I do not own Syfy's Alice.

Should tho. It's my story. Partially anyways.

Not So Mad

Another Name

Alice just won't believe me. Says I'm pulling her leg.

I can't pull your leg, I tell her. You'll just kick me with it.

This makes her laugh. I don't why. I don't want to get kicked by a karate expert, do you?

Naw, didn't think so.

Still and all, I'm telling the truth.

Because that woman, that Lady, is a Wonderlander through and through.

What? You didn't think I was the only one to ever cross over in pursuit of something, didja?

I crossed over in pursuit of love, of Alice.

Yeah, yeah. Dig at me all you want for being a sappy git, but it's true.

And it's really hard to adjust here.

Buildings on the ground and teeny lil mushrooms and cars and paper currency.

Honestly, most Wonderlanders that pop on over pop right back soon enough.

Just burn out, burn up, or something.

Some though, like her and me, we stay in pursuit.

Me for Alice.

And her for noteriery, for fame.

Her, that Lady.

That Gaga.

First time I saw her singing on the the tellyvision, me jaw dropped open.

"Blimey, that's fantastic! She did it! She really did it!"

And I was so glad for her.

"I'm tellin' ya, Hatter, one day, I'm gettin' outta here. I'm going somewhere bright and different and free. I'll have all the clothes I ever wanted and I'll be fabulous and I won't have to answer to anybody for myself!"

We were sitting in me office, passing the time. She'd convinced me to unplug the silver headphones I usually listened to music with and "let the magic out into space", as she put it.

So I did. She was a sweet girl and I always liked making her smile.

Even if she did work for the Hearts.

Yeah, you heard me.

That sweet girl with the big green eyes and pouty lips worked for the Hearts. And by default, the Queen.

Oh, and she was smitten with the Prince.

Yeah, you heard me.

The Prince.

She thought he was just dreamy with sky blue eyes and proper English and mannerly ways.

I felt for her, I truly did.

Even if The Prince could have seen past the Duchess (she was much more curvy and forward at the time than my sweet friend), she never would have made it past the Queen.

Because you see, even then my friend, your Gaga, was a free thinker.

Boy, was she ever. The ideas she came up with and chatted about blew me mind. You've probably seen the echoes of them in her attire and music videos.

That's how I knew her, you see. She'd changed her hair and her name and everything else about herself she could in this, Alice's, world.

But when she presented herself as the Mother Monster with all her strangeness, I coulda picked her outta a line up, as you'd say.

And then when she let that magic out into space, it was even more clear.

And even though her sounds don't really appeal to me personally, I always feel happy to know she got wanted.

Freedom. Fame. Fortune.

Because I remember when she sad, frustrated, malcontent.

"I'm so sicka bringing that snooty Queen drinks for her to just throw 'em in the Suits' faces! Or that beaten down husband of hers! And then I have to clean it up! Once she even made me clean her shoes with her smelly feet still in 'em! And the Prince saw, he was standing right there the whole time!"

She, my sweet friend, not the Queen, had been sold as a servant in the Hearts Casino by her Tea-addled father when she was younger. Which as I'd told her before, was not the worse thing he coulda done in an emotion-smudged haze.

"Hey," I encouraged. "It's not so bad, love. And you never know, that King of hers might give her the right smack she deserves any day now."

I meant for it to lighten her mood but she only tilted her head at me in frustration.

"That's not enough, Hatter! I don't wanna just get by and survive! I wanna be seen! I want everyone to know me! I want to be the Queen!"

I shook my head in disagreement, smirking fondly at her.

"Naw, love, you're too good to be a smarmy queen. You're too much of a lady."

A smile, a real smile, started to find its way onto her uniquely lovely face.

"Besides, you're gonna get free of her, I gotta a feelin', love. You just wait, it'll happen."

She smiled, big and bright then. Kissed me on the cheek.

"You're the best, Hatter!"

And off she went, humming something deep and throaty and slightly happier than the forlorn tunes that usually followed her wake.

It wasn't long after that she stopped coming by me shoppe to chat. I wondered if the Queen had gotten carried away in a fit o' manical rage or something. I asked around but nobody seemed to know.

Eventually, I just hoped for the best for her and moved on with me life.

Once, Alice teased me a little.

Call her up, she said. Say hi, congratulate her.

I chuckled at her, my naive Alice.

Why in the worlds would I want to do that, I asked her.

She looked confused, of course she would. She's always so direct.

Because she was your friend, she countered.

Exactly, I replied. So if she was my friend, why would I want to remind her of how miserable she was back then? A good friend would let her move on with her life and be happy, not upset her all over again with remembrances and such.

Alice had no answer to this.

But she hugged me real tight then.

And I let her.

Hey, let's keep this on the downlow, as you'd say, yeah? Wouldn't want anyone gettin' all riled up, would we? Naw.

And thanks again to you, DinahRay, and your lovely enthusiasm. ;)