Chapter 14: Promises
For a long while after I woke, I laid unmoving in the bed with Edward's arms wrapped tightly around me from behind. The sheer white curtains that hung from the open windows danced gracefully in the light breeze. I didn't want to move. I wish I could freeze frame this moment in time; I never wanted it to end. I couldn't seem to get last night out of my head - or let alone want to. He had overcome all odds, and fulfilled his promise. And for now, that is all I asked.
His lips felt remarkably soothing as they met my neck, like placing ice on a burn.
"Good morning, Mrs. Cullen." He muttered against my skin. A smile spread across my lips at my newly acclaimed title. Mrs. Cullen; it sounded formal, sophisticated. I rolled over so that I was facing him.
"Morning."
"How were your dreams?" he asked, kissing my forehead lightly. I thought for a moment. Did I have any dreams last night? I couldn't remember.
"I don't think I had any." I said slowly, still trying to dull down the memories of the previous night. However, if anyone were to know, it would be him.
"Why? Did I say anything?" I hoped it was nothing too embarrassing, especially since I had no memory of it.
"No." he breathed. "I was simply curious."
I let out a low sigh of relief. After that, it was quiet for a long while, and I didn't mind. I never minded when I was with him. Rays of sunshine brightened the room. I watched as they playfully reflected off of Edward's skin, sending an array of sparkles across the walls. All the while, he was laying there - my personal angel. Softly humming my lullaby. His fingers brushing gently against my cheeks. His eyes never once straying away from face. His face was so beautiful, almost to the point of being unbearable. I found myself wondering how I would look once I was like him.
"Edward?"
"Yes, love?" he crooned.
"Will I be beautiful?"
"You are beautiful." He misunderstood my question. I looked directly into his eyes.
"No. Will I be beautiful after?" I asked hesitantly, trying to keep the serene mood. His body momentarily stiffened beside mine, but quickly relaxed. Did he think I would forget?
"That is an irrelevant question."
"Why?" I demanded. All silence now deceased. He took my face between his stone hands and gazed into my eyes.
"You will always be beautiful to me."
I grumbled for a moment but let it go. He chuckled. I knew he had one, and by the smile on his lips, so did he.
Just then, my stomach let out an embarrassing loud growl.
"Breakfast time for the human." He laughed. I grimaced. I was beginning not to like it when he called me human. It seemed like the more he said it the longer I would have to wait to inot/i be one. But I knew he was still biding his time. Still trying to convince me that being human was not all that bad. And every time he brought it up, I swiftly reminded him of his promise and he became quiet.
"Bella, it's time to eat." He said once more, this time removing the word "human".
I stumbled awkwardly out of bed and my feet met the hard wooden floor. With one hand I reached to pull my hair back into a low pony tail as I looked back up. Edward's expression had turned horrified.
"What is it?" Panic colored my voice and I reached out to him. I followed the path of his eyes. They led toward my hipbone. Small dark blue and purple bruises stood out vividly on my ivory skin - created when he gripped too hard during last moments of passion. With his cool fingertips, he gently traced the outlines of the inflictions. Cursing under his breath as he did so.
"I'm sorry." He whispered, unable to look at me. "We should have waited. You were much too fragile for this."
I drew back from him. He looked up, sorrow and disgust flooded eyes. And I immediately regretted my callous action. I reached out to touch his face and he dropped his eyes once more.
"Edward." –I turned his chin so that he was looking at me- "I wanted this." He removed my hand from his face and took it in his own. His eyes shifted once more away from mine. "Edward" I said again, this time a little more lighthearted. "Every little bruise"-I poked at them-"totally worth it."
"Bella, iplease./i" He almost begged. "I didn't want to hurt you. I wanted it to be...perfect." The last word was only a muttered whisper.
"iPerfect?/i" I spat the word. I could feel my blood beginning to boil and my pulse accelerating rapidly. "I don't want 'perfect'. I don't want it to ever be any different than this." Once more, he ran his fingers along the dark smudges but didn't say another word.
"I'm hungry." I complained. I really hate how whiney my voice sounded when I would do that. But I was desperate to distract him from his masochistic obsession with my wounds.
"What would you like?" He looked up. His smile was halfhearted, but at least his eyes were calm.
"Ummm" I pressed my finger to my chin. "Pop-Tarts!"
"Pop-Tarts it is."
Only when he walked out of the room did I notice he was fully clothed. My luggage was propped up on an old maple chair. The intricate designs caught my attention momentarily. Little angels with wings were carved delicately into the wood. I was almost afraid that the heaviness of my bag would cause the chair to buckle under it's weight. At least I had only brought one instead of the five that were almost forced on me by the Cullen girls. However, leave it to Alice to find the largest bag known to humanity. Since I refused to bring five medium sized ones, I was stuck with this one; a large pink and white duffle. In reality, it was more of a body bag than anything else. I had also made the mistake of letting Alice pack my bag. She did not give me one pair of jeans to wear, only frilly skirts and lacey blouses. Of course. I noisily unzipped the zipper and found Jacob's bracelet patiently waiting on the pile of clothing. I had placed it there before we boarded the plane, afraid that somehow the little wolf would come detached and get lost. I picked it up and clasped it to my wrist. The only thing I was grateful that Alice packed was my blue dress that I had worn to my bridal shower.
I ambled into the large bathroom that connected to the room. The shower took longer than expected. The hot water was relaxing as it smoothed out all the knots and kinks. When I was finished, I dried off and carefully slipped the dress over my head. Loosing my balance and stumbling on little puddles of water in the process. I ignored my dripping hair and tied it into a messy bun that sat at the top of my head. When I entered the kitchen, Edward was perched on the stool and the Pop-Tarts placed on the space beside him. I smiled while I took my seat.
"So." I started. But I didn't quite know how to ease into the question. Maybe now was not the best time. Maybe tomorrow. But how silly of me to be so hesitant. He knew what I wanted and I had no trouble asking for it before. Was it because, this time, I knew that the response was not too far away? That the moment I asked, he would sigh but have to give in because of our agreement? Quickly, I nibbled on a Pop-Tart to stall for more time. He just looked at me, waiting.
"Bella, please tell me what you are thinking about." He said after I had finished
I frantically wracked my brain for another topic. Any other topic. My Pop-Tarts were done, so eating was no longer an excuse.
The words sputtered from my mouth without second thought. "When will you do it?" I thought it would be safer not to mention the word vampire as it often had negative connotations. And I didn't want anything I said to sway his answer in the wrong direction.
He sighed and looked into my eyes.
"Soon." He whispered. His answer was one of dread and at the same time recognition. I could tell by his tone that he knew this was inevitable. I was no longer afraid. I had no doubt, no fear. He was the one I wanted to be with, forever and always. That would never change. On many accounts, I had told him this. And his answer was always; "Bella, I do not doubt your love." That was all. He never said anything more on the matter.
This time, it was different. I was going to fight back.
"How soon, Edward?"
"Too soon." He muttered so fast under his breath, I almost missed it. I took his face in my hand, forcing his eyes, for the second time today, to face mine. The ring on my hand glittered in the sunlight seeping through the windows - though not as brilliantly as Edwards skin.
"You promised." I whispered. His expression twisted with agony at my words. He did not like it when I would talk of promises. It reminded him of the one time he had broke a promise to me. The time he left, leaving me broken and shattered. It was a low blow- and I knew it. But I was grasping for anything.
"Soon" he repeated. "I" -his voice was strangely hesitant for a moment-"promise. No matter what Bella, I will." His lips twitched ever so slightly into a smile and I couldn't help but return it. Soon. That wasn't too bad, I guess. Or was it?
"This weekend?" My eyes darted back to his. My voice was demanding, expectant. He closed his eyes as if considering the possibilities being able to talk me out of my decision by the end of our trip. Finally, his eyes opened, meeting my gaze.
"This weekend." He finalized. I could tell he was planning something by his smile, but I didn't want to upset his sudden change of mood.
"So, what's on the agenda today?" I prodded playfully while hopping down from the tall stool.
"Well" His voice indecisive. He looked at me, a tentative smile on his face. My eyes narrowed suspiciously.
"Well, what?"
"How do you feel about heights?" he asked, suddenly playful. My mind immediately raced back to the day I had decided to cliff dive without my supervision: Jacob.
"Depends on the height." I concluded pushing the thought firmly out of my head.
"20,000 feet?" He smirked. I could literally feel my eyes bulge out of my head and his smirk grew even wider.
"You're not taking my skydiving, are you?" Of course he was. The Cullens were known for their love of the fast lane.
"There is no need to worry, I will keep you safe. Besides, this might be a pleasant experience for you. There is no way for you to trip, because, well love, you're already falling." I scowled at him for the jab at my clumsiness. He just laughed.
"Oh yes," I sneered. "Plummeting myself from a plane that is 20,000 feet above the ground is completely safe. There is no way I could possibly be injured."
"You're rather feisty today." He commented, while pulling me into his chest. He leaned his head down so his lips were at my ear.
"I will never let go of you." He whispered.
"Never?"
"Never."
Every inch of fear drained from my body as my nerves subsided. I could feel him toying with my bracelet that was crushed against him. I pulled wrist away gently, not wanting to hurt him with my actions. And he didn't say a word as I strategically removed my hand from his.
"You look beautiful." He sighed. "I don't want you to have to change." His mischievous tone didn't match up with his statement.
"Change?" Confusion plane on my face. "Into what?"
His lips curved into an impish grin. He detached himself from my arms and before I had a chance to protest, he was back. In his hands was something long and spandex. A jumpsuit.
"Oh no." I shook my head.
"It's for your safety, Bella." He insisted, thrusting the suit into my hands. "Please put it on."
I looked at him in sheer amazement. Did he seriously expect me to wear this?
"Wait." – He handed me a pair of goggles- "These as well."
"Edward." I protested. There wasn't time for me to finish my argument or even think of a logical statement. Because before I could speak anything more, I found myself on the bed, and Edward inched from my face.
"Put it on." He muttered, his breath intoxicating me. It was impossible to win when he did this. His kissed my lips gently and then left me to try on the dreaded black and silver lump of cloth.
"Oh my goodness." I mumbled to myself while examining the tightness of the jumpsuit in the mirror. It wasn't horrible, but it definitely wasn't something I would want to be seen in – or even see myself in. The tight fabric clung desperately to my skin, as if at any moment it would fall off.
"Edward!" I screamed. It wasn't necessary to yell, but I felt better voicing my anger.
"No way." I objected. He took me by the shoulders and spun me around, assessing my complaints.
"It looks...sexy." He said after a minute. I had only heard him call me that once before and that was when he had bought me a biker's jacket and helmet. I looked at him with skeptical eyes.
"Well, I'm not wearing it."
"Yes, you are."
We both glared at each other. Neither one willing to give in just yet.
A smile slowly started to form on my lips as I deviated a cunning plan.
"What are you thinking?" he inquired when he witnessed my change of emotion.
"How about a compromise?" I suggested, my smile sly.
"I am not compromising your safety, Bella."
"No." I interjected. "I will still wear ithis/i" –I motioned with one hand to the hideous outfit. "But you have to do something in return."
"What would you like me to do?" He chose his words carefully. Making sure not to agree to anything too quickly.
"You have to wear one too." His face wrinkled at the idea, but quickly gave in.
"Ok. Anything for your safety." That was surprisingly easy. A little too easy, even for Edward. He snapped me from suspicions with his sudden proclamation.
"Are you ready?"
"We're going now?" I asked, not entirely ready for my near death experience yet.
He nodded and took my hand.
center/center
The car pulled to a smooth stop in front of an old fashion plane. It was like the type little children build as model airplanes. The air was crisp and cool as the breeze whipped gently against my hair. Edward and I were both fully dressed in our jumpsuits. He looked unbelievably gorgeous as always. Unlike my goggles, Edward's were deeply tinted to the point where it was impossible to see his eyes. His entire body was completely engrossed in the spandex material, no skin was visible. Even his face was concealed from view. Only then did it hit me, he had never planned inot/i to wear one. The sun would have given him away if he didn't. His charade was carefully planned out from the beginning, all to get me to agree to wear the jumpsuit. My compromise was for nothing. I elbowed him angrily in the ribs as we walked over to greet the pilot. But regretted it instantly. A throbbing pain was jetting out from my arm. It was like hitting a rock. But I didn't dare complain, I had to let him know I was furious.
"What was that for?" He asked, looking down at me.
"You're a cheater." I sneered.
"I don't get what you mean" His voice was innocent. But his eyes gave him away.
"Yes you do. And you know it."
"I'm sorry. But you wouldn't have worn it any other way." He apologized. I grumbled and surrendered. It was hopeless to try and be angry at him.
"Hello there. Are you two ready to dive?" A man in a yellow jumper asked. I laughed internally at his funny little Hitler mustache.
"Yes, Sir." Edward replied, his arm wrapped tightly around my waist.
"Have you ever done this before?" He looked at both of us.
"No" I answered.
He explained the rules and safety precautions. And before I knew it, we were in the air.
The wind thudded angrily against my ears. I couldn't hear a thing.
"Edward" I screamed. "I can't do this!"
He looked at me, a reassuring glance. His crooked smile melted my heart.
"Cheater." I mouthed.
"Are you ready?" He leaned over and whispered in my ear.
"No." I said stubbornly. He chuckled. Both our harnesses were strapped together in a way so that my back was against his chest, both of us looking down.
The instructor hollered the last number enthusiastically, like he was counting down the launch of a space shuttle. "Jump in 3...2...1!"
The breath immediately left my lungs. He had neglected to inform me of the free fall. I couldn't scream, I could speak. But strangely enough, I found this exhilarating. The adrenaline pulsed rapidly through my veins. With one arm, Edward held me securely to his chest and with the other he yanked on the chord that released the parachute. A sharp tug dragged us back, as we were both floating peacefully through the air.
"Are you alight?" he asked me. I still had difficulty finding my voice.
"Bella?" His tone anxious.
"Yes." I croaked. "I'm fine." Both his arms found my waist and he kissed the top of my head. Our feet hit the ground and we both stumbled and fell into the cool grass. The parachute gliding gracefully downward and shielding us from the outside world. His released the harness that connected us but did not relinquish his arms from my body.
"Thanks" I said. "That was fun."
"I thought you would like it. That is, after you got over your fear." He chuckled.
Just then, his tiny silver phone was at his ear. His expression suddenly unreadable.
"What is it?" My eyes frantically searching his face, trying to find a crack in his unbreakable mask. He ignored me and continued with the urgent call.
"Yes. Ok. Now? Alright. Bye." Then he snapped the phone shut and pulled me to my feet.
His hands worked so fast to remove the buckles that they were just a pale blur.
"Edward." My voice verging on hysteria. "Who was that? What is going on? Edward!" After a long moment he answered.
"It was Alice. Apparently we should be expecting some visitors."
I gulped. I don't know why I asked this but I did. "Who?"
He looked at me, his eyes worried.
"Jacob."
I let out a sigh or relief - being glad the word he hadn't spoken was Volturi.
"And he continued." And? There was an and? "The Volturi."
Both? At the same time? No. This could not be happening.
"When?" I murmured.
"Tonight. Alice saw the Volturi arriving at 3:00am. And Jacob." His eyes staggered towards mine. Making sure I was alight to hear the next set of news.
"Jacob?" I asked
"Well, Jacob had actually gone to our house to apologize, but we had already left. It was Emmett who confronted him when he saw Jacob at our door. He was ready to attack when Jacob just fell to his knees. Emmett didn't know what to do, he was ready for a fight, not a surrender. He immediately called for Carlisle. They questioned him. And Alice said every word he claimed was sincere. He apologized for every action he had committed. When he inquired our whereabouts, Alice told him she didn't think it was a good idea. But he said that he wanted to get a chance to talk to you before it happened." He looked down at me, his eyes searching my face. I was still trying to absorb this news.
"She told him where we are?"
"Yes." He nodded. "She said he left only a short time after we had. He is currently here in New Zealand. It will only be a matter of time before he finds us. Would you like to stay and talk to him or would you rather not?"
I knew what he was asking, though he was too polite to ask it straight out. Behind that question, lied another one. One filled with hate and malice.
"I think," I hesitated. "I will wait for him." I couldn't look into his eyes.
"Whatever you would like." His tone was casual, light. Like I was just going to catch up with an old friend. I stole a quick glance at his face. It was composed, but not at all natural.
"Edward, if you don't w-" I began but he interrupted me.
"Bella. It's okay. This is your decision. And I know you've forgiven him. You are a far better person than I am." He lulled. I toyed with a charm on my bracelet absentmindedly, this time the heart.
"He's here." Edward said as we arrived back at our cottage. Jacob sat unmoving on the wooden rocking chair. His eyes locked with mine for a brief second before they shifted to Edward's.
"Don't count on it." Edward sneered towards Jake. He didn't even attempt politeness.
"What? What did he ask?" I murmured.
"He wanted to know if it were possible if he could talk to you alone, and I told him no."
"Oh."
Edward misunderstood my answer.
"Unless that is what you want." He amended. If I were to talk with Jake alone, I knew without a doubt that Edward would not be far away, listening. But if I said that I would like him to stay, that might make the situation worse and inevitably uncomfortable.
"Do you mind?" I asked. He didn't answer and kissed my lips gently. Then he sprang lithely from sight.
I walked warily over to where Jake sat and stood a few feet away in front of him. His head hung low and his black hair covered his face. I was the fist to speak.
"Jake. Why are you here?" I assumed it was a valid question. But his eyes flashed up to mine. He looked at me like the answer was obvious. He waited for me to say something. When he noticed I was still confused, he began.
"Bella, I'm so sorry. I know I've told you that. But I mean it, really I do. From the deepest part of my heart; I'm sorry." He pleaded. His hand reached out for me.
"Jake. I've already forgiven you." I sighed. His eyes were of wonder as he took in what I had said.
"I don't know how you could have. What I did what inexcusable. I don't deserve your forgiveness."
"You're right." I said. His eyes filled with agony. "But I have given it to you, nonetheless." It was quiet for a moment. I hadn't moved from where I stood.
"You wanna know why I came to your wedding the other day?" he asked, his voice weak. I wasn't going to bring it up, but since he had, I decided to humor him.
"Why, Jacob?"
"Because I wanted to see you. I want you to be happy. I want you to be with him. I see that now. I couldn't live with myself if I missed it." His voice trailed off. It sounded fragile, faint, remorseful. "Then, I came here with the intent of winning your forgiveness. I made you a promise, Bella. I promised to never leave you. And I couldn't just walk out of your life, especially the way I had. I was ready to do anything for you to only say that I was your friend again. But to see that you have already forgiven me..." He was lost in thought.
"Consider us friends, Jake." I said taking a step towards him. He couldn't stand it any longer. With one long stride, he filled the gap that separated us. His arms wrapped tightly around me and crushed me into his warm chest. I hugged him back.
"I've missed you." I muttered. He didn't say anything. But I knew that my Jacob was back. The one I always knew. My best friend.
After a long moment, he pulled away from me.
"I guess I should go." A genuine smile on his face.
"Why?" I demanded.
"Aren't you on your honeymoon?" He accused, his expression was wily.
"Yes Jake, I am." My tone flat. I knew what he was getting at.
"I'll see you later." He said. He gave me one last embrace and whispered in my ear. "Thanks for never giving up on me."
"Thanks for keeping your promise."
He pulled away and started to jog off into the tall grass.
"Jake!" I yelled after him. He turned around. "Be careful!"
"Sure, sure." He called back. Then he disappeared behind the rolling hills.
As soon as Jacob had left, I felt Edward's cool arms from behind me.
"How did it go?"
"Like you don't know" I said playfully. He chuckled.
"Yes, you're right. I just wanted to hear it from you."
"We're friends." I said. He left it at that, not asking anymore.
Edward lay beside me on the cream sheets, toying with my fingers. I began replay today's events in my head. In only a few more hours the Volturi would be arriving at our door. It was now or never.
"Edward."
"Hmm?"
"It's time."
His body turned stiff behind mine. I could hear his jaw tighten.
"No. Not because you're afraid."
"Damn it Edward. I'm not afraid!" I lowered my eyes in shame for yelling at him.
He cupped my chin in his palm and waited till my eyes met his.
"Then what is it, love?" He whispered.
"I just don't want to wait any longer." I said slowly. That was only half the truth. The other half I was not entirely sure I wanted to tell. He saw right through me.
"Is there any other reason?"
"Yes." I admitted. He waited for me to continue.
"They're going to kill me when they arrive and see that you have not changed me yet. I think now would be the perfect time." I spoke so quickly that I wasn't sure if I had said everything correctly, but he seemed to understand.
"I know." He sighed in defeat.
The fading sun trickled behind the trees and shadows danced on the walls.
His eyes seemed to blaze even in the dark.
"Twilight" I murmured. It brought back that night after the prom. He leaned over and kissed by forehead. His mouth traced my jaw line then met my lips. His kiss was passionate. It felt horrifically familiar. I had experienced this kiss before, the time when James had been tracking me. When we were not sure if we would ever see each other again. His mouth moved urgently with mine. His hands knotted in my hair. I pulled away and we were both gasping for air. He sat up and was the first to speak.
"I made you a promise, Bella. And I plan to fulfill that promise. Tonight." His eyes met mine. I cuddled up to his chest.
"Don't be afraid" I murmured. "We belong together." I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words. This moment was so perfect, so right, there was no way to doubt it. His arms wrapped around me, holding me against him...It felt like every nerve in my body was a live wire. "Forever." He agreed.
His lips brushed against my collar bone and glided up to the hollow at my throat. My heart beat frantically. I let out my last breath as his cold lips pressed gently on my skin, binding me to him for all eternity.