A thousand thoughts flashed through Allison's mind at that one moment, buzzing around her head like a swarm of angry bees. "What?" She stammered, her eyes daring to stare into his. She lowered her voice to a whisper, her voice strained. "Please, don't,"

Bender wavered for a moment, narrowing his eyes in consideration. "You heard me."

"John," Allison murmured, and he felt his stomach flip at hearing her say his name, a sensation that was neither bad or familiar. Sure, he'd felt a horrible twisting feeling in his gut when he heard his father slam the door or yell a string of curse words, but he'd never felt his stomach back flip like that, apart from when she said his name like that. "Don't do this."

Her hand reached out, and he snatched the book from her reach. Allison shook her head minutely to herself, and sighed. She hadn't actually been reaching for her sketchbook, and once again tried to grasp for his hand. This time, he stayed still and silent. Anxiety bubbled beneath Allison's calm exterior; her fingers shook as she curled them around his, and she breathed in deeply. The scent of his cologne filled her nostrils and it slowed her heart rate as she remembered those days and nights spent so close to him.

Biting the bullet and setting her anxieties aside, Allison leaned her head in and pecked him on the lips. Though it only lasted a second, and it was more like a child being dared to kiss the boy from across the street than a lusty teenage lip-lock, it surprised the both of them. "Oh," Bender says in surprise, not knowing what else to say.

Allison smirked in spite of her shaking hands and sweaty palms, and the heat rose to her cheeks. Holding her hand out, she smiled sweetly. "My book, please," she says calmly. The expression that crossed Bender's face was half amused, half annoyed. Allison did not expect Bender to actually hand over her sketch book, and so when he did, she smiled happily, her whole face lighting up. Standing, she raised her eyebrow and motioned for Bender to follow her.

Allison walked slowly to a corner of the library, with Bender trailing slowly behind her, watching her every move careful. He watched how she walked, how she looked to the ground, how she curled her pale hand into a fist as she concentrated on getting to her destination and not on the many pairs of eyes that were glued to her small, dark frame.

"I don't want to fight with you." Allison says to him quietly, her voice wavering on the last word. "I don't know what I did wrong."

Bender, although hurt by her comment about not knowing what she had done wrong, felt anger stirring within him. "You acted as if you were...you..."

Never one to voice his true feelings, Bender grappled for the right words to say, struggling greatly to find words to correctly express his feelings towards her. Allison waited patiently, gently encouraging him with a nod. "Go on,"

"You acted as if you weren't the same." Bender says mechanically, trying not to let any emotion seep into his words, that, while being meaningful, sounded robotic. "The same as the rest."

Allison laughed humorlessly, a sour expression washing over her delicate features. A smile skimps Bender's own features for half a second, long enough for her to see it, but not long enough for her to memorize it for a sketch. "Who are "the rest"?" Allison asks, her words dripping with a non verbal contempt. "We've been brainwashed, you know," she states, leaning back onto one of the many book shelves. Bender shakes his head, lights up a cigarette, and raises his eyebrows, a gesture she takes as if to say, "continue."

"Brainwashed." Allison repeats, sighing, and taking a drag from his cigarette. She blows out the smoke with a small cough, and he smiles for a second. "Mm."

"How so?"

"You..." Allison begins, her eyes scanning the library for something, anything, to take her mind off the fact that he was biting his lip as he listened to her. "You think you're so different to me."

He scoffs, but then catches himself. "And I'm not?"

"Nope.." Allison shakes her head. Bender wonders what is going through her mind as she speaks, because she talks in a way that he had never come across before. Her words were never rushed, never meaningless. Everything she said was carefully thought through, meticulously and scrupulously combed through to find the exact right words, strung together in a perfectly coherent sentence. "You're stupid, and so am I."

Or, at least, most of the time.

"What?" Bender laughs.

"It's very simple." Allison sighs. "We believe what we're told. When we're little, we believe that our parents are the bravest, most wonderful people in the world. When we're ten or eleven, we believe that the world is full of hope. And now? We believe that each of us in this room is different. Well, I'll grant you - we're different now. There's a criminal - that's you. A basketcase, moi. There's also a princess, an athlete, and a brain. And yes, we're all so different and you're not getting straight As and I can't dress like I stepped out of a magazine, and the world is absolutely brimming with possibility and hope..but do you think we'll all be so different in five years from here? Ten? Nope. Because when you grow up, your heart...it dies."

Allison shakes her head. Bender doesn't speak. He wants to hear her speak more, because she's speaking so much sense and to be perfectly honest, he could listen to her soft voice all day long. "If that doesn't bother you, then I don't know what will..." she continues, close to tears. "I care. I care that my heart is going to die. I want the world to be full of possibility and hope and yet all I can get is a room full of judgmental stereotypes." She shakes her head. "I wanna see the world, John. I don't want to die before I've lived."

Before he even knows what he is doing, he makes a promise that he knows will be the only promise he'll keep in his whole life. He promises to show her the world, and he intends to make good on every single word he's said.

A/N:

Sooo...I hope you like this. Allison's words may or may not reflect my own attitude! Haha. I do hope you like the chapter and thank you all for the kind words, it really inspires me!