I woke up in a daze, my head layed on Franks chest; I could feel it rise and fall, gently. That's when I looked up and saw Franks surreal face above mine, his eyes tightly shut in sleep. I jumped up in shock. A blanket covered us...what had happened last night? I remembered coming to Franks house...Goonies...sleep...NO! Holy crap, I didn't... did I? I checked under the blankets, I was naked...I caught my breath...crap. Franks eyes napped open at my movement and he sat straight, bolt right up.
"What the hell?" H e said his eyes wincing as well looked between each other and grabbed for the sheets...
"We didn't do that...Um...did we?" He asked... I looked around the room, everything was everywhere, scattered around in our daze...my clothes lay in a messy pile...so did Franks...I guessed that we had by that time.
"I think so..." I whispered.
"Oh shit...umm...we better get changed..." Frank said pulling the blanket tightly around him, his brown eyes skimming over me.
"Yeah....why don't you face that way...and I face this way..." I said going bright red. He nodded so I got up quickly and pulled on my clothes...my make up was smeared over my face. When I was done I turned around to see Frank pulling on his t-shirt, had I ever notice how amazing his toned body was before. I looked down that back at him feeling guilty, I couldn't look at Frank the same...After he pulled his top on h stayed looking at the other side, like he had said...wasn't he such a sweetie?
"Frank...you can look at me..." I whispered...my breath, my voice...the only sounds filling the room. Frank turned around very slowly...he still looked at the ground...
"Frank, look at me..." I said feeling my cheeks burn. I walked forward slowly...I took his hand.
"What happened last night...it was a mistake, right?" I told him...He looked up, he looked like he was going to answerer at first but his mouth closed...he looked down again, then up and answered.
"Yeah..." He said his voice almost apathetic.
"Then we're not going to tell any one...we're just going to act like normal...like best friends..." I said, unsure of my words...
"Yeah, yeah...ph shit 'Elena...I just cheated on my wife...I just slept with one of my best friends daughter and my best friend in one!" He said pulling his hands over his face.
"Frankie...oh god I know...I just did it with...You...y'know? My uncles and dads pal...my friend...my best friends husband..." I felt myself moving back and sitting on the couch. Just saying it made everything feel so much...realer...
"'Elena you've got..." He pointed to my neck. I touched it...it stung...fuck a stupid hickey.
"Oh fuck! I better go and cover it up.." I sighed... that's when something hit me.
"Frank...did we use a condom?" I asked. He face changed...
"Shit I don't think so..." he whispered. That's when I felt that deep feeling in my stomach, burrowing it's way deep into me.
"Oh god 'Elena I'm so sorry...you don't need..." I interrupted him before he got any further, our eyes stuck together.
"No...Frank don't say sorry...I'm not sorry about what happened. I'm just going to go and get the day after pill..." I sighed, getting up, my hands brushing through my hair.
"But I'm the eldest...I should be the adult about this..." He said betting up and walking towards me. I jumped back...anger flared through me.
"Oh that's what you think of me as? A 16 year old kid?" I asked insulted.
"Oh god know...of course I don't...I just mean after everything that happened..." he stopped, straight away you could see in his eyes that he had said the wrong thing.
"Oh of course you don't think of me as a 16 year old...I'm the 16 year old Bipolar freak! Oh that's so much better!" I screamed walking towards the door.
"'Elena, please don't..." He whispered...pain in his voice made me feel sick.
"NO! You're as bad as the kids at school!" I screamed opening the door and running out. I pulled on my sunglasses over my eyes. I ran down the street...I could hear Franks voice from behind...He shouted after me...but he didn't peruse me...When I looked back he was sitting at his door, his hands over his face...Oh god how could I have let this happen? HOW? Why did I feel like this? What was this feeling...Oh shit...I had promised myself that I would never let anything like this happen, not after everything...I would let myself have a one night stand, but how could I call this a one night stand? It was Frank... I ran along the road, down the street...past all the happy little houses where people played happy families behind fake smiles. When I got to the pharmacy I found some Ebony concealer and walked sheepishly to the counter. The woman looked at my hickey disapprovingly.
"Can I have this and a early conception pill please..." I said looking through my sunglasses, burning red...
"Yeah...I need to see some ID..." she said. I huffed as I pulled out my passport and showed her it from my bag.
"16, huh? A bit young to be having one night stands..." she laughed to herself.
"It wasn't a one night stand..."I said handing her the money...It was even her business. She stopped; looking at me after I handed her my money.
"You're THE 'Elena Way, aren't you? She smiled to herself.
"Um...who? I'm just 'Elena Way..." I said nervously.
"No, no...you're that rock star dudes daughter!" She said proudly.
"No, I don't know who she is, but she's definitely not me..." I said grabbing the pill and concealer and stuffed them in my bag. She huffed as I walked out of the store. I quickly put a blob of concealer over my hickey and made my way home.
Gonna take off all my
skin, Can't find my way home, Do you wanna hold my hand? We're not here to pay a compliment, Can't find my way
home, No
way home why Can't find my way home, I can't find the way Come
on angel, don't you cry
Tear apart all of my insides,
When they rifle in,
Mom
and Dad think you'll be saved,
They never had the time,
They're
gonna medicate your lives,
You were always born a crime,
We
salute you in your grave.
But it's
through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get back in her
arms,
Can't find my way home,
But it's through you and I
know,
What I'd do just to get back in her arms.
(Well my gun fires
seven
different shades of shit,
So what's your favorite color,
punk?)
Could you sign this
photograph,
'Cause I'm your biggest fan,
Would you leave me
lying here?
Or sing
about the government,
Oxycontin genocide,
Adolescent
suicide,
I'll give you my sincerity,
{Don't give} a fuck about
a Kennedy,
Here's what I've got to say.
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get
back in her arms,
Can't find my way home,
But it's through you
and I know,
What I'd do just to get back in her arms.
[in
background]
We've got to go
[x7]
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get back in her arms,
Can't find my way
home,
But it's through you and I know,
What I'd do just to get
back, well, in her arms.
My dad stared at my suspiciously as I got in, I ran straight upstairs and into my room. I got changed first...just into some jeans and a tee...I felt seriously ill... I then looked at the instructions on the back of the box for the day after pill...Like everything I was sure I couldn't take it with lithium, but I just swallowed it dry and forgot about it. I had to find some way to get it into the trash...I walked down stairs, the packet stuffed in my bag.
"So what was that all about?" My dad yawned sleepily.
"What?" I asked
"The running upstairs..." he said stretching out and turning of the TV.
"Nothing...I needed to can..." I lied. I sat down next to him hoping Lyn would get home soon and entertain him so I could put this in the trash.
"What's that on your neck?" My dad asked staring at my roughly covered love bite. I blushed fiercly...
"Nothing, I burnt myself with the strengtheners..."
"Oh...you should put some cold water on it...it looks quite bad..." my dad told me...Thanks Frank!
"Oh, Okay!" I said seizing the chance and running into the kitchen and closing the door. I turned the tap on for effect and then squashed the packet down into the depths of the garbage. I splashed my face with some water before retreating upstairs into my room for a snooze.
GERARD
"So what was that all about?" I yawned.
"What?" She sounded very defensive...
"The running upstairs..." I turned of the TV sensing something behind this convocation...
"Nothing...I needed to can..." She sat down next to me...she kept twitching about...
"What's that on your neck?" I had noticed a red, fierce mark on her neck...was it a hickey?
"Nothing, I burnt myself with the strengtheners..."
"Oh...you should put some cold water on it...it looks quite bad..." I said cautiously.
"Oh, Okay!" She jumped up over zealously...running into the kitchen and closed the door. I heard the tap go on...maybe it was just a burn. A matter of seconds later she sneaked out of the kitchen and upstairs...I turned on the TV and tried to concentrate on the countdown of Americas favourite 40 music videos...
"Honey, I'm home!" Lyn laughed as she came in with Bandit, thank god she was home. I jumped up and took Bandit out of her push chair lovingly.
"'Elena back yet?" She asked taking of her coat.
"Yeah...I think she went to bed..." I cooed as I played with Bandit. Lyn smiled and went into the kitchen, probably making coffee. A couple of seconds later Lyn came out holding a day after contraception packet...
"Um...Lyn?" I asked as she stared at me.
"Yeah..."
"Why are you holding that..." I asked presuming it was hers.
"Gee, this isn't mine...I found it when I was putting Bandit diapers in the trash..." She said sounding slightly scared...that must mean...it was... 'Elenas.
"Hell no..." I said getting up. No, she wasn't going onto this stage...after everything I thought she was getting better...
"I'll go and get her..." Lyn through me the packet then ran upstairs. I looked down at it, lying in my hands...this was crazy.
"Dad what's this about?" I heard 'Elena say sleepily. I looked up to see her face...I couldn't believe it...there must be a mistake.
"Do you recognise this?" I asked handing it too her. She looked down at it...tears forming in her eyes.
"I'm so sorry Pa'...oh god, It was a massive mistake..." She burst out crying, she wept into her hands...I wanted to hug her, but I didn't know how to.
"Who was it?" I asked... She looked up.
"No one...a stupid guy from my school, I'm so sorry..." She said through her tears...