CHAPTER 14: SIMBA'S FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL
THE DAY AFTER THE WEDDING SHOWER GINNY DECIDED TO SIGN SIMBA UP FOR SCHOOL.
SIMBA: NOW
THAT I AM 2 DAYS OLD I FEEL LIKE I AM READY FOR SCHOOL.
GINNY: AS
DO I.
JUST THEN SIMBA BECOMES ANXIOUS
SIMBA: MOTHER
WONT THE OTHER CHILDREN MAKE FUN OF ME BECAUSE I AM 2 DAYS
OLD?
GINNY: MOST LIKELY, BUT THEY WILL ALSO MAKE FUN OF YOU
BECAUSE YOU ARE VERY FUCKING UGLY.
SIMBA: THANK YOU. IT IS
TRUE.
GINNY: OH YEAH I CANT DRIVE AND ITS COLD AS BALLS OUT, SO
YOUR GONNA HAVE TO WALK TO SCHOOL, OK?
SIMBA: CAN'T I RIDE YOUR
MAGICAL TURTLE?
GINNY: FUCKS NO.
SO SIMBA WALKS TO TOT OGWARTS
SIMBA: WOW I HAVE MADE IT AND ONLY ACQUIRED SEVERE FROST BITE. THIS IS GOOD.
SIMBA THEN GOES TO HIS FIRST CLASS. THE TEACHER WALKS IN
PROFESSOR NORTHQUILL: LAWL IM FUCKING TEACHING YOU SONS OF BITCHES.
NORTHQUILL THEN SPOTS SIMBA IN THE CORNER OF HIS EYE.
NORTHY: FUCKSHIT!!! THAT BABY IS SO UGLY. LETS ALL MAKE HIS LIFE A LIVING NIGHTMARE. LOL.
SO ALL THE STUDENTS ATTACK HIM AND KICK HIM IN THE THROAT
SIMBA: I FEAR I CAN NO LONGER BREATHE.
SIMBA THEN RETURNS HOME NO LONGER BREATHING AND BEING COVERED IN FROSTBITE.
GINNY: OH HI
SIMBA, CAN YOU MAKE DINNER?
SIMBA: I GUESS...
SO SIMBA GETS OUT A PAN AND BEGINS TO FRY RICE
SIMBA: LOLZ WELL I GUESS WEZ
EATING FRIED RICE.
GINNY: I FUCKING HATE FRIED RICE AND YOU.
PLEASE LEAVE THE HOUSE.
SIMBA: BUT MOMMY I THOUGHT YOU LOVED
ME...
GINNY: DID I EVER SAY THAT? FUCKING TWAT...
SIMBA: TIME TO VISIT DADDY!