Well that was a good response to last chapter. 109 for JJZ-109. Anyway, this chapter is a landmark one because it marks a year of JJZ-109 on FF! It all started with a silly little idea for a Lion King fanfic and that grew into my flagship series, and an FF obsession. If someone showed me all my work now, in May 2012 I would not have believed it. It is just too unreal, looking at it from that perspective. And this story in particular, is shaping up to be by far my most successful. Anyway, May the 4th be with you! Finished watching the whole saga last night in celebration. Anyway, too many reviews to respond to this time around. I'll try and do it by PM tomorrow.
Cheers: JJZ-109
CHAPTER 14. ESCAPE ORLANDO
Everyone's heads slowly turned to look where Leia was pointing. Chewie quietly growled his uncertainty and Han scoffed. How was that rusty piece of junk supposed to get them out of here? Deep down, Han still hadn't lost belief in the Falcon. But he couldn't help but think that this may be the last time he saw it. He shot another glance at the Pizza delivery truck distastefully. How was he supposed to pilot that thing? It did look like there only hope though, with all the other vehicles locked down in the Imperial perimeter, especially the Falcon.
"Mistress Leia, I do not believe we are qualified to-" 3PO started, but Leia slapped a hand over his mouth.
"Shut up professor, now come on..." Leia urged and started carefully making her way to the car park through the foliage, in a crouched position.
"Perfect. Someone should be ready to get out and push." Han scowled looking at the car.
"I used to say the same thing about the Falcon." Leia whispered back to him.
"Took it for granted, didn't you?"
They quietly reached the Pizza Planet truck, and carefully hid behind the side of the car as they stopped to open the door. Leia tugged on the handle, but it gave out only the dooming click of denial. She sighed in frustration and backed away from the door a little. A large, rusty dent was visible on the side of it. Han pushed past her and cracked his knuckles.
"Let me."
SMASH! He struck the window with his right elbow, shattering the glass. That was all it took. They all jumped back in fright as the car alarm instantly sounded, and their hearts sank as they saw all the Stormtroopers' heads snap around to look at the disturbance. Chewie roared in alarm, and they all got the message.
"Heroes! Blast them!"
Han shoved his arm into the window he smashed and pulled open the door lock, before diving in as the laser bolts started flying. Chewie leant up against the hood and fired a few covering shots with his crossbow as the others frantically got in. He flinched as a blaster bolt struck the side of the car, sending sparks showering on him. He too then dived in the car and scrambled into the front passenger's seat as Han rummaged through all the glove compartments, searching for a spare key. Eventually, he found that it was hidden under the floor mat. Han scooped up the key swiftly and plunged it into the ignition.
"Come on! We need to get out of here now!" Leia shouted from the back seat, above the roar of blaster fire.
The fire then ceased when the troopers realized that nobody was shooting back at them, and they started running over to the car.
"Come on, come on, come on!" Han said frantically as the old engine coughed, refusing to start.
Suddenly VROOM! It roared to life and Han managed a smile. He felt around the floor with his feet, getting them onto the pedals. He stamped his foot down hard onto what he thought was the accelerator, but the car remained idle. The engine just revved again loudly, and the car jolted. Han thumped the steering wheel in frustration.
"Han, hurry! They're right here!" Leia urged; the Stormtroopers were all of 30 yards away now, and closing fast.
"Why won't it go?" Han asked. He had no idea how to operate one of these Earth land-crawling vehicles. Everything he had done so far was out of common sense.
Leia thought for a moment, and examined the instruments before Han. An idea then dawned on her, and she hoped it would work. It was the only logical solution. She pointed to the gearstick, which was still in 'P'.
"Use the wand of power!" She instructed him as the Stormtroopers reached the vehicle.
Han slammed the stick into 'Drive' and the car suddenly flew forward, making the Troopers dive to get out of its path. To not surprise the blaster fire started up again, and a stray shot smashed the back windshield open. Han quickly gained control of the speeding Pizza Planet truck, and found himself swerving through the car park with the Imperials in hot pursuit.
"That was too close." Han panted as the reflection of the Stormtroopers in the rear view mirror became smaller and smaller.
"LOOK OUT!" Leia screamed just as Han started to relax and lose focus.
He slammed on the breaks, and car skidded across the asphalt, making the tires shriek. When the car finally stopped, it was at the foot of an AT-ST assault walker.
"Uh oh." They all seemed to say in unison, and the AT-ST slowly turned its main guns around to face them.
Han then shoved the car into reverse, and sped away from the walker with the screech of tires and smoke flying. PEW, PEW, PEW! Adrenaline pumped through Han's veins as he skillfully slalomed the car in and out of explosions created by the AT-ST's powerful laser cannons.
"Jesus Christ you're going to get us all killed..."
Han then slammed on the breaks and swerved the car the right way around, the old diesel motor rattling in protest. The Fedora hat flew off his head as he did so, making it roll across the dashboard. He then started accelerating back towards the main Disney Park, and the crude loading docks, where all the characters and supplies has been captured.
"You're not going back there, are you?" Leia snapped from the back seat.
"Well we aren't getting out through the conventional exit." Han commented and recklessly gunned the car through the loading docks.
He narrowly passed through a tight space between two parked speeders, and quickly turned to avoid a group of hostage Rebel guards, who could only watch as the out of control truck rolled past them with countless Imperial troops in pursuit. A crane then swung across the top of them, just skimming the roof of the car. The frantic drive through the unloading docks soon became another deadly slalom, as they left mess and destruction in their wake.
"Can you even drive one of these properly?" Leia managed to get the words out, despite being thrown around in her seat.
"Drive? Yes. Park? No." Han said as his hands danced across the steering wheel, trying to navigate the car through the maze of unloaded supplies, ships, people and Imperial soldiers.
Han noticed as they narrowly avoided hitting a group of oddly dressed and colorful people.
"Who the hell even are these people?" Han asked as they started to steady now that they had some distance on their attackers.
"Well, I think that's the first of the prequel characters. Starting with the Phantom Menace."
Phantom Menace characters...Hmm...I wonder if...
The question Han had on his mind had been answered before he'd even manage to say it.
"Youssa gotta slowsa bombad car down! How wude!" A familiar high-pitched voice yelled out to them.
Han slammed on the breaks. No imperial insult or torture could compare to the sound of that voice. The car jolted to a stop, and slowly turned around to face the first few Phantom Menace characters. He eyed down the small group of characters, and locked onto the one that slightly resembled a duck, except with large earflaps behind him.
Their eyes then met, even from a good 40 yards away. The best and worst of Star Wars exchanged gazes. One snarled, and the other gulped. Han then revved his engine in anger, and spun the wheels, behind him, flicking up white smoke. Even the Emperor's whole 501st couldn't mean anything to him now. He then released the brakes, and car sped forward towards the small crowd.
"What the hell are you doing? Get us out of here! We haven't got time for this." Leia nagged at him angrily, but soon saw what he was charging at, and shut up.
The rest of the Phantom Menace characters ran away at the sight of the charging car, and only one was left clumsily standing there. Jar Jar's heart sank as he saw the Pizza Planet truck speeding towards him. Han smiled as Jar Jar began running away screaming his usual chaotic, childish, slightly racist and fanatical panic.
Jar Jar sprinted off to the left, flailing his arms behind him, and Han swerved the car so he could follow. A Stormtrooper raised his rifle to shoot at the truck, but his Sergeant gently pushed his blaster down.
"We'll blast 'em later. Right now, let him kill the abomination." The Stormtrooper ordered his peer.
Han managed to get Jar Jar Binks running out in the open, and that was his chance. He planted his foot down on the accelerator and closed the gap between them. Soon, the bumper was touching Jar Jar's back, as he fled in fear. Enough of the games... Han thought and switched on the windshield wipers. Time to cure 13 years of distaste for Episode One.
He ran over Jar Jar, and watched his body get sucked under the front of the car. The vehicle bounced upwards as the front wheel rolled over him, and with as the second wheel went over, they heard the sickening but ever so delightful sound of his spine being cracked. Han drove forward and swung the car around to face Jar Jar's crippled body.
"Is he dead?" Leia asked from the back seat.
"Why you do dis to meesa?"
"No." Han answered and planted his foot down on the gas pedal again.
This time, he stopped on top of Jar Jar's mangled body, ignoring his protests and winces. He then proceeded to make sure that the back wheel was on top of Jar Jar's body, before doing a massive burnout upon him, sending blood and incompetent Gungan body parts showering over them.
"WOO-HOO!" Han shouted in joy as the blood rained down on the wind-shield, and he switched the windshield wipers to full.
Han, Leia, Chewie, the droids and even Stormtroopers watching on cheered in joy, exchanging laughs, high-fives and hugs. Eventually, before the motor was worn down, Han continued off the bloody mess and continued fleeing the Imperials. The engine roared as they smashed through a chain link fence topped with barb wire, and rolled down a dirt hill.
Suddenly, Leia felt an odd sense of peace. One she hadn't felt since the 1980s. Before the dark times. Before Jar Jar Binks. With his death, a massive disturbance in the force had been calmed. Across the galaxy it was felt, among force adept and non-adept alike. The franchise was partially cured.
The troopers then snapped out of it and hopped into black Jeeps with Imperial markings, in pursuit of the heroes.
"Han, we've got Imperial cars on our tail." Leia reported, looking out the back window.
"Ah...Should've used his head as a hood ornament." Han thought aloud as he recklessly directed the Pizza Planet truck onto a highway.
As he left, he got a faint view of the Falcon still in the parking lot, and sighed loudly. He may never see his ship of many years again at this rate. He then looked in the mirror, and saw that the jeeps were gaining rapidly. He weaved in and out of traffic, to the annoyed beeps and wails of several civilian cars.
"Yeah, yeah...shut up...WHOA! Moron in the Volvo!"
PEW, PEW! Blaster bolts truck the fender of the car, making it swerve a little, but Han managed to regain control. The old Hilux was simply too slow though. It wouldn't make it. The Jeeps were much newer and faster.
"Leia, give 'em a taste of their own medicine!"
"Got it." Leia replied and poked her blaster pistol out the window, before replying with a few hopeless shots back at the Jeeps.
It was no use though. They were gaining too rapidly, and there were far too many to handle with pistols. Leia grunted in frustration as she shot.
"I can't hold them! They're too fast...Theirs too many!" She cried out frantically.
Han nodded. He couldn't lose them on the highway, that was for sure. There was only one thing left to do...if it would even work.
"Chewie, where's the lightspeed on this thing?" Leia's jaw dropped at the question. Had the man lost his mind?
"What? Are you insane? Going to lightspeed in the atmosphere of..." Han wasn't listening. All that was on his mind was shaking his pursuers.
Chewie barked and pointed to a silver switch on the dashboard. It read: Nitrous Oxide: ARM. Han saw it too. Whatever that is, it'll do.
He flicked the switch, and it beeped, illuminating a red button on the center console that read GO, BABY, GO! He quickly maneuvered into relatively empty lane and gulped, before crying out:
"CHEWIE, PUNCH IT!"
The car suddenly sprung forward, and everyone's bodies were pressed flat against the seat with the G-force. The speedometer's needle spun around the gauge aimlessly as the speed went off the its reading capability. Han gripped the wheel with all of his strength as they flew forward. What the hell is NO2 doing on a delivery truck? He thought as the images of the world outside him were in a colorful blur. In the mirror, he saw the reflection of the Imperial cars fade away as they gunned down the highway. The car eventually started to slow down, giving everyone an opportunity to get their breath back.
They had made it.
"My head..." C-3PO moaned and straightened his metal body up on the back seat. A slice of pepperoni pizza was stuck to his face.
"What...was that? I can't believe we made it," Leia panted and smiled at Han, leaning forward.
"Sweetheart, we got five of the main characters in the car, I'm pretty sure we were always going to be alright."
Han allowed a moments silence as he casually drove through the expanse of Florida, further and further away from Orlando. They had all just been through a lot. What the hell was that Imperial attack about? Where did all those troopers and AT-STs come from? More importantly, where the hell was Luke and was he alright? Even more importantly, what would they do now they didn't have a ship? A rusty old Toyota pickup certainly couldn't do.
"Now what? Where do we go now? We can't go back to the park."
"To Iger perhaps? Maybe he can set things straight?" 3PO suggested, but R2 chirped his disapproval.
"Or maybe to Lucasfilm, to Skywalker Ranch! We'd be safe there." 3PO continued.
"Hey, I always wondered, why do they call it Skywalker Ranch? Why Luke and not the rest of us?" Leia managed to find something to complain about.
"I got an Asian Food chain named after me. Han's cafe? Ever heard of that?" Han pointed out, but 3PO shook his head.
"I do not think that was named after you Captain Solo." C-3PO argued from the back.
"Anyway, your highness, I wouldn't complain. Half of the fanboys have named their right hand after you." Han joked and Leia scowled. That stupid scene. Thank the force Han was blind during it, otherwise she would never have heard the end of it.
Han noticed how the fuel gauge was getting low, and turned onto a highway exit. He cleared his throat to get everyone's attention and spoke out.
"Here's what we're going to do. First of all, we're going to find Luke. According to Leia's voodoo powers he's still all good. Then we regroup and figure out what the hell is going on, okay?"
Chewie roared in agreement, and R2 whistled.
"Sounds like a plan for now." Leia confirmed.
How was that? Sorry to any offended JJ Binks fans. But the majority of the fans hate him. Including me. I had to do that at some point. Hope you enjoyed!
This has been JJZ-109, and as always...Have a nice day.