A/N: Sigh... Several weeks of depression, sickness, and downright exhaustion later, here's chapter 14. I feel really bad about being so late with this, I just had a rough few weeks for no reason in particular... However, never fear, it will not affect the storyline or mood of this fic.

Misshapen mirrors surrounded Shikamaru, portraying him in all sorts of unflattering ways. Breathing hard, he looked around for some means of escape, aside from the doorway he'd just come through. Sweat trickled down his neck and his ears pricked at the sound of heavy footsteps behind him. What the hell is chasing me? Slamming the door shut, Shikamaru felt his heart begin to thump hard against his ribcage. Hearing the footsteps halt, Shikamaru took a fighting stance, ready to make a last stand if necessary. Silence. Maybe it went– THWACK!

Shikamaru couldn't help but jump as the door groaned and threatened to give. Guttural grunting came from the hall, accompanying the rhythmic clunk of a broad shoulder against the door. An explosion of nausea brought Shikamaru to his knees, clutching his chest in agony. Staring down, he gaped in disbelief as liquid skin seeped between his fingers into a bubbling mass on the floor. He yelled in mounting terror as he felt something wriggling underneath his grip.

A reddish lump of tissue broke free and lay, pulsating, on the ground a few feet from him. The organ beat for a few seconds before rolling into the shadows. Shikamaru only had a few seconds to sit in stunned incredulity before the door splintered, small shreds of wood showering down onto him. Back against the wall, Shikamaru's mouth gaped at the creature in front of him.

It's skin was rubbed raw, muscles and tendons showing in places as it shambled towards him. Mouths, ears, noses, and eyes covered it's body, and it's misshapen limbs all ended in rotting clubbed feet or crab claws. Worse yet was the fact that its face was a distorted version of his own, transformed by a hideous snarl and sightless eyes. For a moment it opened its mouth to taste the air, before fixing it's blind gaze on him and grinning.

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Shikamaru woke up, pale and sweaty, but otherwise unharmed. Rubbing the last traces of sleep from his eyes in bewilderment, he sat up. Judging by the golden glow on the horizon, it was sometime shortly after 6:00. Creakily, Shikamaru crawled out of the sleeping bag and pulled on his black shirt. I don't remember eating any magic mushrooms... I haven't had a nightmare in who knows how long. Weird. His thoughts were interrupted as Temari entered through the tent flap, blinking in surprise.

"You actually woke up on your own? I am soooo proud of you." She started to laugh, before noticing he had blanched and his hands were trembling. Cocking her head to the side, she frowned slightly at him.

"You feeling all right, Pineapple head?" He blinked and waved her off, all ready stuffing his sleeping bag into a rucksack.

"Yeah, I'm just peachy." Temari looked at him strangely, before shaking her head and taking her bag outside. Shikamaru sighed, realizing he was practically radiating edginess and anxiety.

As he stepped into the clearing, he brightened slightly at the scent of food. Stretching, he plopped down onto the soft earth and sat cross-legged, hungrily eying the food inside the frying pan Temari was holding. She smirked sideways at him, noticing the improvement in his mood. With one flip of the skillet, she sent the meat paddies flying and expertly speared them on four kebab sticks.

Handing two to Shikamaru, she watched in amusement as he tried to restrain himself from wolfing them down. Grinding his teeth, Shikamaru forced himself to take one dignified bite at a time. Puzzling over the peculiar, yet delicious taste, he waved one of the sticks at Temari.

"What is this? It's actually pretty good." Temari beamed at him, causing him to cock an eyebrow. Uh oh.

"Why thank you! I think that's the closest you've come to complimenting me. And don't tell me you've never had ground prairie oysters before?"

Shikamaru paused in mid bite, eye twitching and his face turning a strange color of pea green. When he looked like he was about to hurl, Temari patted him consolingly on the back, looking smug. Sputtering, he managed to force down the bite he'd been chewing. The thought of consuming another mammal's reproductive organs was not pleasant to him.

"You're kidding, right?" Temari shrugged and rose, kicking dirt on the fire and shouldering her bag.

"You know what? I'm not going to tell you. But it is a delicacy in Suna." Shikamaru eyed the last half of his kebab warily, before sticking it in the earth for some forest animal. Muttering, he grabbed his duffel and slung it across his back.

"There is no chance in hell I'm ever going to Suna, then. Crazy people..."

Temari flashed a smirk at him and turned away. Leaping gracefully onto a branch several yards of the ground, she called back to him.

"And what makes you think we'd ever want you, lazy?" Shaking his head, Shikamaru stretched his leg tentatively, wincing slightly at the protest of his injured muscles. Ehhh. The sooner I get back to Konoha, the sooner I get to sleep. Shrugging, he took off after her, struggling to match her loping pace.

"Slow down, dammit!"

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Leg cramping, Shikamaru grunted and landed strangely on the branch in front of him. Flailing his arms, he managed to regain his balance. His leg buckled beneath him and he was forced to sit awkwardly on the thick branch, resting. They had been traveling for almost four hours, and the strain of rigorous movement had finally worn out Shikamaru's wounded quadriceps. Grimacing, he struggled to his feet and hopped down from the tree to rest more comfortably on the ground.

Temari, just realizing what was wrong, leapt back to him and crossed her arms. Closing his eyes, Shikamaru grumbled at her and sat back, hands behind his head. When he heard no movement or protest, he opened an eye warily. Temari, just stood there, looking down at him strangely. Resigned, she shrugged and sat down beside him, close enough to make his eyebrows raise involuntarily.

"I'll let you off the hook this time. You have ten minutes, then we're leaving."

Shikamaru nodded gratefully, before looking sideways at her.

"Why did Gaara send you to Konoha anyway? It can't have been just to strengthen relations."

The characteristic fire left Temari's eyes, and she looked dullly up into the thick foliage.

"It's about my marriage..." Gulping suddenly, Shikamaru almost broke into a coughing fit, choking on the saliva he'd inhaled. Recovering not so gracefully with an 'Urk' like sound, he continued to stare, bug-eyed at the girl next to him. Why do I feel like I've been punched in the stomach?

"What's wrong, did a bug fly down your throat or something?" Searching frantically for a subject changer, Shikamaru settled on the first one that came to mind.

"Who would want to marry a scary woman like you, anyway?" Oh, real nice. You have an elegant way with words, that you do, Shikamaru.

Glaring, Temari punched him in the arm, snarling.

"I'll have you know that guys are lined up halfway across Suna trying to woo me." Her gaze dropped and she rubbed her arm sheepishly, like she'd been the one struck.

"It just so happens that they're all chauvinistic, greedy, old guys. Or sexual predators."

Shikamaru snorted, but he made sure to soften his tone when he spoke.

"That sounds like a great selection. So who's the lucky– errr unlucky guy?" Temari's eyes shot up, and she looked half angry, half bewildered at his comment. Searching his befuddled eyes for answers, she murmured her response.

"That's why I'm here. I haven't picked anyone, and the suitors are getting... antsy. One started to stalk me, and wouldn't take 'no' for an answer. So, here I am on a 'vacation.'"

Shikamaru had to look away to hide his sigh of relief and compose himself. When the blush had faded from his face, Shikamaru turned back. Startled, his heart began to beat even quicker. Did she get closer? Doing his best to keep his voice steady, the shinobi felt Temari's warmth against his arm and leg, causing an electric tingling to travel down his spine, hairs on the back of his neck standing up. Gulping nervously, Shikamaru felt all his wits escape him. Panicking at the numbness filling his head, he searched for any sort of distraction, and settled on clearing his throat.

"Sooooo... ummm... err?"

Temari's face flushed, as their hands brushed up against each other, and they locked eyes nervously. Neither knew exactly what was supposed to happen next. Her aquamarine eyes remained focused on his ochre orbs, and Shikamaru felt a dumb sort of transfixion, unable to look away. He was dimly aware that his mouth was still agape, groping stupidly for something... anything to say. The only thing on his mind had four spiky pigtails and was extremely dangerous.

Temari, seeming to gain some confidence in the fact that he hadn't pulled away, relaxed a little bit and smirked slightly at him.

"What's wrong? You look like you've blown a fuse, or something..."

Normally, Shikamaru might have completely shut down, going into a completely unresponsive catatonic state. Instead, something coursed through his veins, and he felt his brain begin to whir again, exiting standby mode. Gritting his teeth, he shook the vacant expression from his face. A man can't let a woman have the upper hand at a time like this. Smirking back at her, he cupped her soft cheek and gently rested his thumb against her lips.

"Shut up."

Their roles were reversed, and now Temari was the one taken aback, eyes wide in silent shock. She certainly was not used to Shikamaru acting anything like this. But for some reason, she didn't seem to mind. Her eyes never left his as she shifted her voluptuous body slightly, turning so she could face him more easily.

Taking his digit away from her lips, he ran it through her sandy hair gently. Before he could convince himself not to, he scooped her into his lap, so that her tan legs were both lying in one direction and her shoulder was resting against his chest. Shikamaru heard a sharp inhalation of breath and, closing his eyes, held back a flinch. It's troublesome, but I'm not going to run away. Even if she beats the crap out of me...

When he opened his eyes, he was startled to find two circles of turquoise flecked with gold and orange only about six inches away. Leaning her forehead against his, she put a hand on either of his shoulders, stabilizing herself.

"You're in a rush. I don't think I've ever seen you so motivated. I would've expected you to fall asleep at a time like this... And anyways, what makes you think I feel any different about you than I do about the hundreds of guys back in Suna?"

A slow smirk spread across Shikamaru's face and he scratched the back of his head, feigning deep contemplation.

"Well, you haven't clobbered me yet. I guess I took that for a pretty good sign." Sighing, he threw put both arms behind his head and stretched. He looked sideways at her at winked. "But you know, you're right. We shouldn't be doing this, we have a long way to go, and we should be traveling, hmm?"

A frown manifested itself on Temari's face as he shifted his weight, trying to squirm out from underneath her. Shikamaru couldn't help but laugh at the small growl she gave him. He settled back against the tree and stared expectantly up at her, raising his eyebrows and smiling slightly, basking in the victory. Finally, her eyes disappeared behind her sandy bangs as she lowered her head in concession. Looking into his eyes, she shook her head and muttered.

"Shikamaru Nara, you are a hopeless case. You're quite possibly the laziest and most lethargic person I have ever met." She rolled her eyes, but did not make any move to get off him. Shikamaru offered her a rare grin, too overwhelmed by the situation to maintain his usual bored expression.

"Well you're scary as hell. Doesn't everybody have their quirks? It's what makes people interesting…" She smirked again and inched forwards, cocking her head to the side. The sun blazed high above them, noon rays reflecting off of Temari's hair and bronzed skin, making them glow in radiance. She relaxed against him and spoke quietly, whispering in his ear.

"That's a good answer." Shikamaru gulped slightly, suddenly feeling his nerves starting to kick in again. He watched her lips purse slightly, and drank in her smoky scent. Screw it. I want this to happen.

Closing his eyes, he leaned forward, heart thumping in his ears.

His eyes snapped open at the sound of a dull thwack. Recoiling involuntarily, he found himself face to trunk with a large stump, arms snaked around its "waist" and "back", lips only inches away from a hole oozing pill bugs and sap. Shikamaru scratched his head in bewilderment for a moment, before noticing the glinting spike that had penetrated the wood, halting a few centimeters from his stomach.

Scrambling up, he launched himself nimbly to the side, into the cover of some bushes, hearing the hiss of several more spikes as they whizzed by where his head had been. Shikamaru grunted in pain as he landed ungracefully on his bad leg, collapsing awkwardly down on one knee.

Ignoring the discomfort, the Shadow nin formed his kagemane seal, scanning the wooded surroundings for Temari and their assailant.

A small chakra signature flickered, perched on a branch far above them, but Shikamaru knew that this person was not the man who'd attacked. Probably just another of those troublesome bozos from last night. People never learn. Dismissing the low level ninja, Shikamaru continued surveying his surroundings.His eyes widened as he felt a familiar chakra signature.

Can't be... If he didn't bleed out, I split his leg nearly in half... He'd be a cripple even with the best of medical attention. Temari landed gracefully in front of him, back to him, iron fan spread wide in a defensive position. She seemed to have come to the same conclusion about their attacker as he had, seconds earlier.

"I thought you dealt with this guy." She remarked with subdued frustration at the interruption.

"So did I. There's another chakra signature up in the trees, but I think it's just one of the goons.

She looked back at him in apprehensive contemplation for a moment, a troubled expression on her face. Shikamaru saw her eyes dart to his injured leg and started to protest.

"Temari, I'm fi–"

"No, no you're not."

"A man can't just hide behind a woman." He crossed his arms in defiance, while fire burned in her eyes.

"Cut the chauvinistic crap, you boneheaded baka!"

Their little tiff was interrupted by a roar of hatred. Standing a few yards away, Kaizuketsu made for an imposing sight, hulking body ending in an outstretched finger, pointing directly at Shikamaru. Disturbed, Shikamaru felt his blood chill as he noticed the foam at the corners of the man's mouth and the absence of color in Kaizuketsu's eyes. The fiery irises were gone completely, replaced instead by an unpleasant bloodshot white, making him seem like less of a human and more of a beast.

The metal wielder struggled to construct a sentence, trying different syllables futilely, before giving up. Shaking his head wildly back and forth, Kaizuketsu let out a guttural snarl before charging blindly forward, hundreds of small metal balls hurtling alongside him, tearing through branches, sending showers of splintered wood raining down on the forest floor.

Shikamaru's yell was drowned out by a powerful gust of wind, as Temari brought her fan crashing down into the ground. Immediately his vision was obscured by a cloud of dust, small blades of chakra coursing randomly through it. I didn't know she could do that...

Kaizuketsu's chakra signature ceased it's advancement and he backed away involuntarily. Frozen in his spot, Shikamaru was in such awe of the giant wall of dust that he might have not moved at all if a slender hand had not gripped him by the wrist and tugged him desperately away.

When they were far enough away that they could actually see each other, Shikamaru raised his eyebrows in appreciation. Temari dusted herself and started to say something, when an earthshaking bellow rang out and a section of the wall disappeared. This is bad...

Temari looked torn for a moment before running through a series of hand signs Shikamaru did not recognize. Immediately, her fan began to levitate, rising slowly but surely off the ground until it hovered around hip level. Checking to make sure the few belongings she carried on her person were secured, Temari gracefully boarded the fan, sitting cross legged across the narrower edge, near the handle. She looked very embarrassed as she motioned to the space behind her urgently.

"Hold on to me tight. I don't need to tell you what will happen if you fall off this thing when we're 500 feet up in the air."

Shikamaru's eyes bugged out as he realized what she was thinking. She's joking right? Humans are NOT supposed to fly... However, he made his decision when the sound of heavy footsteps reached his ears. Grimacing, he clumsily mounted the iron weapon and put his arms around Temari's waist.

Blushing furiously, Temari shut her eyes, and the fan began to rise, giving Shikamaru a sick feeling in his stomach as the ground grew farther and farther away beneath them. Daring a glance down, he saw Kaizuketsu staring in awe up at them, a thin man beside him. For a moment the fan dipped violently and Shikamaru saw his life flash before his eyes as Kaizuketsu tried to manipulate the metal. Then, with one last tug of resistance, they were out of his range and safe. Well, relatively safe... That ground looks hard and sharp...

Daring another glance down, Shikamaru's eyes rolled back into his head and he gave out a small groan. Temari, apparently forgetting the awkwardness of the situation, was completely at ease with her surroundings, and glanced back at him grinning.

"Don't tell me you're afraid of heights..." Shikamaru, whose face was a particularly interesting shade of green, looked at her, rife with misery.

"Apparently I am..." He paused for a moment before groaning loudly in exasperation. Wait a minute... Did we just lose all of our baggage?" Temari nodded. "My mother is going to skin me alive..."

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Finally, after several hours of gut wrenching flight, Konoha came into view, the highest towers visible on the horizon. Loosening his grip on Temari, Shikamaru exhaled deeply and wiped his sweaty palms against his shirt.

"Why didn't you just fly us here in the first place?" Temari answered bluntly.

"It uses a lot of chakra, I'll probably have to sleep for a couple days to get it back.:

"Psh... Sure. WHOA! I'm sorry!" Shikamaru yelled a the top of his lungs and closed his eyes as Temari executed a barrel roll, turning them upside down for a long second of terror. When she finally righted the fan, the sand kunoichi was whooping with laughter, while Shikamaru remained silent and pale. When he did find words, he only muttered.

"Never do that again."

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A/N: Sort of a jumbled chapter. A lot happened and it might have been kind of jumpy. I'm sorry it's so late, but I had a lot going on with the parental units. Next Update: Sooner than this one (maybe).