CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Clarys pov
"Oh really?"
"Yes" i said with an eye roll
"There is no way in hell you remember that, i dont even remember that" i laughed put down my fork, he followed my lead
"You dont even remember what you had for breakfast this morning" i said and he rolled his eyes
"Yes i do. I had...i had pancakes?" i laughed at his answer, he smiled
"Nope, you had nasty eggs" i said, he chuckled as i wrenkled my nose
"I would have remembered that though" he argued, i laughed
"Im telling you, you ate duck before, we didnt tell you it was duck, and you loved it" he looked discusted and i just laighed again. Jace was deadly afraid of ducks
We were at Takis eating lunch, and it felt good to be normal, not having to look behind myself every ten seconds. I was safe with Jace, in fact i was safe with them all
"So, how is therapy?" i rolled my eyes again at him "That bad huh?"
"She keeps telling me that i wont be better unless i forgive myself and feel pretty" i said, i picked up my firk and started to eat again, but looked up when Jace didnt reply, he had this strange look in his eyes
"You blame yourself?" he asked, i looked down, then back uo at him after i had collected myself
"It was my fault for trying to help him when i thought he was hurt and-"
"No, shut up, what happened to you is not and never will be your fault Clary, and i will be damned if you think like that under my watch" i shivered as he grabbed my hand, but not in a bad way. "And you are the most sexiest girls i know" he said in a whisper "if you ever feel other wise, then come to me, ok?"
All i could do was nod, i was speechless, i was in so much ahock, that i didnt stop him in time and he had lifted up my sleaves on my shirt, i heard him suck in a breath and i prepared myself for the look of discust that he will shoot my way
But i stead he just pulled tgem back down, "And dont let me find out you had cut yourself again, yeah?"
"o-ok" i stuttered, shaking my head yes. He never let go of my hand through out the rest of dinner, and we ended up walking home hand in hand
The next dayI sighed and knocked on her door, only opening it when i heard a faint come in one the other side, i walked into my sisters roome and layed down nextbto her on the bed, she put away her book and smiled at me
"When i was with Raphael" i begain before she could speak "I never thought thatbi would be home again, i always tgought that it was my fault that i had gotten taken, i thought it was my fault every time he beat and rapped me, i thought it was my fault when i miss carried, i thought it was my fault that i was used by man after man, but its not my fault" i had tears coming down my face, so did she as she pulled me into her
"Its his fault Clare" she whispered to me, i smiled and hugged her back, with a nod of my head, i k ew that i had just forgave myself, i didnt think it would have been that easy. I hugged my older sister tighter
"Whats going on in here?" we broke apart and looked at our brother who was standing in the door way with a smile
"Im forgave myself" i laughed "And Jace helped"
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