Chapter 14

The first thing James noticed when he stepped into Kendall's hospital room was Kendall himself. The blonde was lying so still on his bed that he looked… well, dead. Kendall was usually so tough and always on the go; seeing him so weak and helpless lying in a hospital was almost too much for James.

James shook his feeling of unease off, trying not to worry. He had to stay strong for Kendall, for Logan, for Carlos. But he didn't think he could anymore.

Mrs. Knight was on her way to hospital with Katie, too. When she'd heard about Kendall's… well, disease, she'd broken down. James, Logan, and Carlos had to calm her down while Katie stood by the corner with tears in her eyes.

Suddenly, Kendall stirred. The sudden noise startled all three boys, and they quickly turned toward the noise.

"Is he… waking up?" Logan whispered quietly, not wanting to be too loud. James knew that none of them wanted Kendall to wake up, at least not yet. They were scared of what they'd find when Kendall came back into the conscious world.

"I think so." James replied, rubbing and twiddling with his hands nervously. Was this it? Was this the time they finally saw who Kendall was now?

It was. Kendall blinked his green eyes open, and his eyes held something different in them. Something that wasn't really… well, Kendall. James had seen it in Carlos's eyes all the time… it was innocence. Innocence and confusion, as if he didn't know who they were.

James froze. His heart stopped beating. What if Kendall didn't remember them? What would they do then? Nothing would ever be the same again… Kendall would never be the same again. James felt his knees go weak, but then Kendall smiled.

"James?" Kendall's voice was slurred, like he was mumbling in his sleep. His smile was a little… well, it looked a little insane. Like a smile a… retarded person would smile.

That smile changed everything. James was even more scared than before. This was worse than if Kendall forgot who they were. Kendall was… he would never be the same again, would he? And that was what James was scared most of.

"Hey, Kendall. How are you, buddy?" James was surprised to see Logan talking to the blonde like nothing was wrong. James had expected him to be panicking like crazy about now. But once again, James was wrong.

"Where's mommy?" Kendall slurred, his eyes unfocused and wide. James gulped, clearing his throat uncomfortably.

"She's, uh, coming, Kendall. Soon." He added. Talking to Kendall like he was talking to Carlos was a little… weird. Uncomfortable. Really really weird. Kendall was their leader… and now they were talking to him like he was a baby.

"I want my mommy! I want mommy!" Kendall cried, whacking his hand around, hitting Carlos in the process. The shorter boy flinched, staring at Kendall with wide eyes.

James took Kendall's hand. "Hey, buddy, calm down. Your mommy is coming. Promise. L-Look, there she is!" Luckily, Mrs. Knight was actually making her way over with Katie by her side. James breathed out a breath.

"Mommy!" Kendall cried, trying to sit up. James held him down while Mrs. Knight ran over, Katie following behind her.

"Kendall, honey, don't cry. Mommy's here, alright?" Mrs. Knight looked so broken, so sad seeing her son changed into someone so different, but she tried to hide it. James sighed, his heart feeling like it was cracking in two. This wasn't supposed to happen. None of this was suppose to happen.

"Mommy, it's coming." Kendall whimpered, shaking his head back and forth.

"What is, honey?" Mrs. Knight asked worriedly.

"The monster. The boogie monster." Kendall whined.

Mrs. Knight ruffled Kendall's dirty blonde hair. "Honey, there's no monster. It's just us."

Kendall giggled. It was an odd sound coming from him. "This stick is funny." He squealed, his words still a little slurred. He pointed at the hockey stick on his shirt. His Minnesota Wilds shirt. The shirt he only wore on happy days.

Before anyone could answer Kendall, he'd already closed his eyes and fallen asleep. Everyone seemed to deflate like a balloon without enough air, watching Kendall practically transform into a different person right in front of their eyes.

Mrs. Knight was the first to break the painful silence. "Oh, my poor baby…" She let out a broken sob, falling onto her knees. Logan caught her, telling her not to worry and speaking comforting words into her ears. Empty promises, that's all those words were.

James sighed, turning towards Carlos and Katie. Katie looked like she was frozen in shock, pain and fear etched on her face. Carlos's lips quivered, and James could tell that the only thing keeping him from crying was Katie.

"Katie, you alright?" James asked quietly. Mrs. Knight's sobs were muffled by Logan's shirt, and Katie looked like she'd just seen a ghost. Well, she kinda had… a ghost of the old Kendall.

Katie turned and looked at James, her eyes full of pain and confusion. "Why… why'd this happen to Kendall?" She whispered, his voice cracking and so sad that James wanted to break down right then and there.

James gulped, wrapping his arms around Katie comfortingly. "I don't know, baby girl. But sometimes, bad things happen to good people." It wasn't fair. Kendall was a hero, a leader, a role model. Nothing this bad was supposed to happen to people as great as Kendall Knight.

"I-I just don't get it… I want my Big Brother back," Katie whispered as a tear came down her face. James had rarely see Katie cry. He'd probably seen Logan, Carlos, and even Kendall cry more times than he'd seen Katie cry. If this was enough to make Katie cry… then something was really wrong.

James scoffed to himself. Of course something was wrong. Right when James saw that horrible smile Kendall had smiled at him when he'd woken up, he knew something was wrong. Kendall was never going to be the same again. Never. Never again.

James didn't know why he wasn't crying. He didn't understand why he wasn't sitting with Mrs. Knight, sobbing with her and Logan, who had broken down next to her by now, too.

Maybe it was because he had people he had to stay strong for. He was the leader now… now that Kendall was gone. Or maybe it was because he was just… in shock or something. Yeah, that was probably it. He was just in shock. Or maybe not.

"I don't get it either, Katie… I really don't." James whispered back, swallowing the lump in his throat that was slowly increasing in size.

Katie just nodded, her big brown eyes staring at James. James admired her for being so brave… she was probably braver than he felt at the moment. She was only 11, and yet she was so mature, so courageous.

Mrs. Knight muttered something with Kendall's name in it, and Katie walked away to where her mom was sitting. Mrs. Knight looked up, and the two females hugged each other tightly. James looked away, afraid he would start tearing up, too.

James turned towards Carlos when he heard a sniffle coming from the younger boy. James wrapped his arm around Carlos protectively, pulling him in tight.

"Carlos, buddy, you alright? Don't be scared, it's gonna be okay." James said comfortingly. Carlos just buried his face into James's shoulder.

"It's n-not gonna be okay, James…" He whispered, tears running down his face. James's heart broke. Seeing Carlos and Katie and Logan and Mrs. Knight… and Kendall… so broken and sad made James fill with despair. This wasn't supposed to be happening. They were all supposed to be smiling and living a normal life. Why did everything have to ruin it?

"I know, little bro. I'm sorry. But we'll stick together, and we'll have to stay strong for Kendall, alright?" Carlos just nodded. James reached out and squeezed Carlos's hand in his.

"It'll get better, Carlos. Really." Carlos shaky fingers eagerly squeezed back, a small smile on his face.

They all sat in that room, Kendall's room, every single heart and soul slowly disintegrating and falling into a bottomless pit of devastation.

Things were going to get worse before they got better.

A/N- Hey… it's me again. *chuckles nervously* Please don't hurt me? I'm really sorry… really really REALLY sorry for not updating in such a long time… I'll try to update more often, but now that I'm in high school, I'm a little more busy, ya know? ;)

And Big Time Gold was AMAZING! Logan's totally a SUPERFRIEND! I think my favorite guy in this episode was Logie! Cuz he's just awesome like that, ya know? And when Kendall was all like "PLEASE don't do that at the store!" That totally made my week! :)

Anyways, poor Kendall (we're talking about the painfully slowly updated story again)… my heart almost broke writing this. Did your hearts almost break reading this?

Peace, Love, and Giraffes,

Anonymous Skrtle :)