Chapter 14

Cicada's heart was pounding inside her chest. It was like a drum playing the same rhythm. She had a feeling Sidney Freedman was going to do something. She didn't know what. Cicada stood up, uneasy about the whole thing. She paced back and forth until she made a decision. When she was done packing, Cicada was going to go up the hill at this MASH unit. No one would find her. Besides, it gave her peace and quiet for a while away from the tent. She hasn't been out in over a day, and needed the fresh air.

Cicada finished the last suitcase and inspected the room to make sure she didn't miss anything. She noticed something. The knife. She completely forgot that the knife was there. She hoped that Sidney Freedman didn't see it; if she was lucky. She wasn't. Cicada went to the table, grabbed the knife and stared into it. The blood was dry. She rubbed her thumb on the sharp edge that she cut herself. Debating whether to put it back or not, Cicada put it in her pocket and ran out of there to the hill.

--

Sidney went into the Colonel's office asking where Cicada was going tomorrow. Once he got his answer, he explained Cicada's situation to him. Sympathetically, the Colonel finally responded. "What are you proposing to do, Sidney? She can't stay here, although I would live her to stay due to her condition. Where are you going to take her where she won't become suspicious?" The Colonel then helped himself to the liquor cabinet for some brandy, offering some to Sidney who declined.

"Well, if she's going to Tokyo, I'll ask the driver to take her to Tokyo General. Then, I'll work with her then. They have more to offer than in Seoul." Sidney said sure of the decision.

Colonel Potter took a sip of brandy, sat back at his desk and told Sidney. "Do what you have to do. Make that girl well."

"I'll try." Sidney said getting up and making the phone calls.

--

Hawkeye, who was back to normal celebrated his new found self and had a drink in the officer's club on the house. He still had lost weight, but he could gain it back in a month or so. He sat in the stool with BJ and was laughing hard enjoying his life. His mind was off of the war and the wounded. His only concern now was getting drunk but not too drunk since he had Post Op in an hour or so.

When he was satisfied with his drinks, Hawkeye went back to the Swamp and freshen up for Post Op. He didn't want to go in there as a drunken man. That was unprofessional. He then went into Post Op. He was finally back to normal.

--

For the majority of the day and part of the night, Cicada sat under the tree on the hill with the knife in her hands. She heard that Hawkeye was back to normal and was happy for him. She knew he would get through it all. And Cicada knew that she wouldn't.

She sat and reflected. Cicada remembered her suicide attempt when she was only sixteen. She thought that things probably wouldn't go her way back in the states. If that happened, she was going to try to commit suicide again. This time thought, she was going to succeed. If the psychiatrist was going to put her away, she was going to try it. Nothing was going to stop her. She wasn't going to end up like her mother.

Cicada loved her mother, but not like any other person with their mothers. Hers wasn't always there to cook and clean or greet you with cookies when you came home from school. No. Hers was the one in and out of the mental institutions because of her own reality.

The times that her mother was there it was a miracle. Her mom (when she was normal) would tell her stories of her tribe. Of how they traveled through the harsh ships of the white men. Or the legends of the forces of nature and the ceremonies they celebrated. Lastly, her name. Cicada. Her mother named her after the beautiful noise of the cicada. Her mother adored the sound they made as a whole team. It sounded like a chorus doing a concert for all to hear. Ginger, her middle name was from the most used spice and of course, Rose her other middle name was her mother's favorite flower. Cicada loved to hear these stories. It made her forget that her mother wasn't all there.

Cicada was Cherokee. Full breed. Her mother use to tell Cicada to "be proud of your heritage and stand strong even if the people around you do not." That did nothing for Cicada now. She was always picked on at the schools. After all, it was tough being the only 'Native American' in the entire school. Sometimes, Cicada wished that she would disappeared but at other times, made her proud that she was different.

Then again, she always wished she would disappeared. Her father was an abusive man. It seems like that she was blamed for her mother's illness. After all, it did occur after Cicada was born. Cicada always lived with the guilt feeling. If people told her it wasn't her fault, she couldn't believe them. She always blamed herself.

Cicada took a deep sigh and tapped the knife on her knee. She then decided to go back to her tent for the remainder of the evening. She got herself up and headed to the camp. It was already dust and the stars were out. She took her time going back, no one was going to miss her. She held the knife tightly.

Five minutes later, she was at her tent. It was silent. Cicada turned on the light remade her bunk and lay back down. She shut the light off and held the knife close to her. Shortly after that, she fell asleep.

Eight Hundred Hours the next day. (8:00)

Cicada woke up early that day and went into the sunlight. It was warm and beautiful. Cicada enjoyed it. She grabbed her suitcase of what little she had waiting for her ride home. She put the knife in a little compartment. Hawkeye was up too and greeted her.

"Morning, Cicada." Hawkeye said as he grabbed her waist. Cicada giggled.

"Hi, how are you?" She replied.

"Pretty good. I'm not going home, although I deserve it. Sidney said I'm sane enough to stay where I am."

"Oh, really. Did he leave already?"

"Yeah, he left an hour ago. Had to go back to Tokyo."

"What a coincidence. I'm headed there to catch the first flight to Texas!" Cicada answered cheerfully.

"Lucky."

"I am going to miss one thing though. That'll be you, Hawkeye." She locked lips with him. It was long, and memorable.

At that moment, a jeep came by and honked his horn shouting, "Cicada? Cicada Sarkinsian? Are you Cicada Sarkinsian?" He pulled the jeep near the two and asked his question once more.

"Yes, I am. I'll be right with you." She turned back to Hawkeye. "Tell the Colonel I am grateful for all he has done. Goodbye, Hawkeye. May you be good at everything you do. I will not forget you." She kissed him again.

Hawkeye let go of her lips and replied back in a whisper, "Goodbye, Cicada." With that he gave her a hug. A moment later, she let go, headed to the jeep and was on her way. Cicada turned around and waved to Hawkeye once more. With his traditional grin on his face, he raised his had up and waved again as well. He watched until she was out of his sight forever.

--

Cicada got to Tokyo ok, except she was going to a hospital not the airport. The driver that picked her up from the airport had special orders to take directly to the hospital-no exceptions. Although she was supposed to go home three weeks, there had been a change of plans. Aside from Sidney's plan, HQ realized they made a mistake and she could go home ASAP.

They drove to the hospital.

"Aren't we supposed to go to the other airport?" Cicada asked with concern in her voice.

"Nope, I had special orders to take you elsewhere, Miss." The driver responded still keeping his eyes on the road.

"What kind of special orders?" Cicada asked angrily.

"Sorry, not suppose to reveal that, Miss." He replied.

About ten minutes passed and they finally came to where they going. Cicada read the sign which was loud and clear. Tokyo General Hospital.

That rat! Cicada thought. She knew that Sidney had something to do with this. The driver parked near the entrance since he wasn't going to be there for very long. They both got out and went inside the building.

It was a long building. All the walls and floors were white. They headed to the visitor's desk. A nurse asked them a few questions and forcing Cicada to sign some papers. From the left side of the desk, came Dr. Sidney Freedman who greeted his next patient.

A/N: Almost done! Please keep the reviews coming. They help a lot.