A/N: Here it is people. It took me a while but in my defense it's twenty five pages long. Yeah... it's a monster. I hope you guys like it. Won't make this long. Thank you to all who review! I made my 200th review the other day and I couldn't have done it without the support of my amazing readers. THANK YOU! Thanks to my betas! You guys rock!
"What's going on Dad? Are you okay?" I asked.
"Bells… I need you to go upstairs and pack a few things for the next three or four days," he said.
"What? Where am I going?" I asked confused by his sudden directions.
"We're going back to Forks," he said and looked to the ground.
"What?" I asked shocked by this news. I turned to Damon who all of a sudden was very serious.
"Harry Clearwater died."
My immediate reaction was to launch forward and hug him. Harry Clearwater had been Charlie's friend for… ever.
"Dad I'm so sorry," I said as I hugged him tightly. Over Charlie's shoulder I glanced at Damon. He was serious, and a small frown was starting to form on his face.
I let Charlie go and looked at him. He was still avoiding my eyes, and looking at the ground. I was pretty sure he was trying to fight back tears.
"My most sincere condolences Chief," Damon said as he extended his arm to Charlie. Charlie took it and Damon patted his back with his free hand.
Charlie nodded and glancing towards both of us said, "Thanks, both of you." He then turned to me and said, "Bells could you go and hurry? Our flight leaves at ten and we have to be at the airport in an hour."
"Sure Dad, I'll hurry up," I said quietly and glanced at Damon. He was quiet and concern was written all over his face.
I turned around and saw Elena standing on her porch with her hands crossed across her chest.
I waved at her and signaled her to come over. She nodded and quickly crossed the street.
"Hi Charlie," she said as she passed him while making her way to our door.
"Hi Elena," he responded quietly.
"Well hello to you too," Damon said.
Elena rolled her eyes and made her way up the stairs to the front door where I was standing. I smiled as she came over, she did the same. I let her into the house and we went straight upstairs to my bedroom. Once I had closed the door, I went to my closet and pulled a small suitcase out.
"Sorry Charlie called you this afternoon," I told her.
"He was worried that you weren't home, I get it. Specially after all he's learned in the past few days, it's what's expected," Elena said shrugging as she sat down on my bed.
"Yeah, I guess so…" I said as I took the suitcase and put it on top of the bed.
"What's going on? Where are you going?" Elena asked confused by the suitcase.
"Oh… yeah… one of my Dad's oldest friend passed away today, we're going back to Forks for a few days."
"You're going back to Forks?" she asked a little surprised.
"It seems so," I answered and turned around to my closet again, with the clear intention of looking for my "Forks" clothes.
"Isn't it going to be… weird for you?" Elena asked.
I stopped looking for my clothes and turned around to Elena.
"I don't know, I haven't really given it much thought," I answered.
"You've never really told me what happened back there."
"I know… and I will, I promise. It's a long story and I'll tell it once I get back," I answered.
"And I'll be here, waiting for you to do so," Elena said smiling.
"Thanks," I said and turned around to my closet again.
"I am a little worried though, I don't know how it's going to go with Jake," I said absently staring at the clothes rack.
"Jake? Who's Jake?" Elena asked.
I turned around as I grabbed a jacket, "I haven't talked to you about Jake?" I asked.
"Nope."
"Oh… Well… Jake is like my best friend, like my little brother," I explained.
"Why are you worried about seeing him?" she asked.
Oh boy… this was going to be difficult. How would I explain this without revealing too much? I trusted Elena but I don't think that telling her my best friend back in Forks was a werewolf was a good idea. Then Jake would really be pissed at me for revealing his secret.
"Jake's mad at me. He thinks I told someone something that he trusted me to keep secret," I told her as I frowned a bit.
"A secret?" Elena asked, emphasizing on the word secret. She was silently asking if it was that kind of secret.
I nodded, "Yep, a secret."
"Oh… I see… that's a tough one," she said.
"Yep," I said nodding and putting the jacket in the suitcase.
"Well… did you?" she asked.
"No, I didn't… Once Charlie was exposed to all of this chaos of supernatural he started digging in and put two and two together and he found out. But I didn't say anything."
"Have you told Jake about this?"
"I tried, he's not answering my calls. Now I'll have to face him in a few hours and try to explain," I said as I ran a hand through my hair.
"Yeah, talk with him and explain," Elena said nodding.
I went to the closet and grabbed a few clothes. I went back to the bed and threw them into the suitcase.
"What exactly are you going to tell him? Does he know about your ex and vampires? If he does know… did they get along? Are you going to tell him that Charlie now knows about vampires? What about Stefan and Damon? Are you telling him about them?" Elena asked between quick hushed whispers.
She was asking me a bunch of things I had yet not even thought about. What was I going to tell him?
"Honestly I don't know, Elena. I'm so confused right now," I answered as I sat down on my bed and stared at the comforter while holding my head with both hands.
"He knew about them," I said after a while and looked up at her, "he was actually the one who told me about them."
"He was?"
"Yeah… I think that, it would be best for him not to know about Stefan and Damon, I'll keep him in the dark about that. I'll just tell him about the town legends and that there were some 'animal attacks' here but that there haven't been any in a while. Do you think that's okay? Will I reveal too much if I say that?" I asked her.
"Umm… I honestly don't know Bella…" she said quietly.
I leaned back on the bed and rested my head on my pillow.
"All this lying and making up excuses is exhausting. I'm afraid I won't be able to keep up with all the lies I've told to cover all these secrets," I said as I closed my eyes.
Elena threw herself back on the bed and sighed.
"I know… it's… tiring, it drains you," she said as she stared at the ceiling.
I opened my eyes and looked at her, I started grinning and a laugh escaped me. Elena covered her face.
"Oh my God, excellent choice of words huh?" she said chuckling.
"Can you believe this? We're laughing at something that shouldn't be funny, something that is legitimately scary, shocking, and terrifying," I said.
"How weird are we? What is wrong with us?" Elena said laughing.
"I don't know… but we're seriously… bizarre," I answered her.
"I like this. Having someone I can relate to," Elena said as she turned to her side and looked at me.
"I know… me too," I said smiling.
"Come on, I'll help you finish packing up," Elena said as she sat up. I got up too and walked up to the bathroom to grab my toiletries.
"Does it really rain that much in Forks?" Elena asked, she had my jacket in her hand.
"Oh yeah… it rains, all the time. It's a little depressing really," I answered.
"I can only imagine," Elena said as she helped me thrown stuff into the suitcase.
"So… what happened this afternoon?" she asked casually.
"I really have no idea. One minute Damon and I were sitting on the porch, he was suddenly willing to answer all my questions and the next thing I know I'm following him through the woods to his house and riding with him out of town on that monster of a bike," I said shrugging.
"Damon can be… quite convincing. Did you have fun? Did he try to make a move on you? Do I have to tell Stefan to kick his ass?" she asked quickly one question after the other.
"No… he was okay, in his own way. I did have fun, I guess I needed to let loose for a while, let everything go for a minute and just… live," I said as I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.
"Oh… okay," she said surprised.
"I'm impressed at how he has Charlie wrapped around his little finger though," I confessed.
"Like I said, Damon can be very persuasive. He gets his way."
"I know… I've noticed," I said as I finished packing the last of the things I needed.
Once I double checked that I had everything Elena helped me carry the small, yet heavy suitcase down the stairs. We had reached the last step when I saw Charlie and Damon coming out of the study. Charlie had let Damon in. I stared at Damon in shock, as expected he smirked. I glanced over at Elena who sighed and put her hands in her pockets while she frowned.
"Bella, I'm going home. I hope you have a safe trip. Call me if you need anything," Elena said as she gave me a small smile and walked over to Charlie.
"Charlie I'm really sorry about your friend," Elena said to Charlie.
"Thanks Elena," Charlie said quietly.
"Bye Charlie, Bella," Elena said as she opened the door and glanced back at us, then she nodded and said, "Damon."
"I'll see ya later Elena," Damon said smiling.
"Chief, once again I would like you to know how sorry I am about your friend. My brother and I, we've lost almost everyone close to us, I know how it feels," Damon said as he had one hand on Charlie's shoulder.
"Thank you Damon. It's a shame that you boys are all on your own. If anything, you are always welcome to come over and watch a game or something," Charlie told him.
Great, this was just what I needed. Damon being here whenever he pleased, Charlie had not only invited him in today, he had also given him a free pass to come and go as he pleased.
"Why thank you, I think I'll take you up on that offer," he said smiling and looking at me, I looked away. He then added, "And Chief, thank you for lending me this book, I'll give it a look tonight."
I turned to look at him and saw that he was holding my book on Quileute Legends.
"Oh, Bells, I hope you don't mind I leant it to him," Charlie said to me.
"Actually I do Dad," I said as I went over to them and tried to take it away form Damon, who obviously had a strong grip on it.
"Bells come on," Charlie said.
"Dad, it's Jake's book and I don't know how it even got here. Now that we're going to see him I think I'll give it back," I said as I tried to take it away from Damon.
"I'm sure you can give it back some other time kid," Charlie said to me.
"No Dad, I can't. Jake is mad at me right now," I said as Damon finally let the book go.
"Alright then, if it's that important," Charlie said.
"Yes, it is," I said.
Charlie shrugged and then turned to Damon.
"Thanks for everything Damon," he said as he shook his hand.
"No worries Charlie. Look, if you want, I can give you a ride to the airport, I'll bring your car back once I drop you off," he proposed.
There was no denying this guy knew how to get on the good side of people. Well… when he wanted to.
"That would be great Damon, thank you."
"There's no problem," Damon said smiling, Charlie turned around to grab his bag and Damon winked at me.
Manipulative prick.
We got our stuff into the car and Charlie handed the keys to Damon. I climbed on the backseat and waited for the two of them to get in the car. They were outside, exchanging a very quiet conversation.
What was Damon up to? What could they possibly be talking about?
They finished their conversation and got on the car. Our drive to the airport was quiet. No one spoke a word. Damon would occasionally look at me through the rearview mirror and give me a wink or a small smirk. I would turn and look to one of the windows.
How was it that this afternoon I had felt kind of normal around him and now all I felt towards him was irritation? I felt as though he had invaded something that belonged to me. My home. The only place that up until now, was mine. I wasn't ready to let him in yet. Him or Stefan. I guess that the fact that I could control this had given me some peace of mind. My house was my sanctuary, away from the supernatural.
Ultimately I blame Edward for this. A few months ago, on one of those sleepless nights, I had started thinking about Edward and his overwhelming presence. I realized that it was a bit creepy really. Having him there in my room, watching me sleep, almost stalkerish. He came into my room through the window every night, and all he did was watch me sleep. I didn't have any privacy when I was with him, and this was something I craved for now. Privacy.
Knowing Damon was able to come and go as he pleased made me mad. By the few things I knew about him, I had a feeling he would come over more than I could want him to, and this, this made me angry.
When we got to the airport, Damon accompanied us. While Charlie was making the line to check us in Damon stayed with me. I didn't look at him and he didn't look at me. He just stood there quietly by my side.
"I told you it was a matter of time," he said breaking the silence.
"Don't you dare hurt Charlie Damon, he trusts you way too much."
"What makes you think I'd hurt Charlie?" he asked irritated.
I turned to look at him, "I… just don't hurt him okay?"
"I don't plan on doing it," he answered.
"Good."
We were quiet again and after a few minutes he broke the silence again.
"So you're patching things up with you little case of puppy love?" he asked mischievously.
"What?" I asked him quickly. Did… did he know about Jake?
"You know what," he said seriously.
"No I don't."
"Yes, you do," he told me.
"No," I said coldly.
"Come on, are we doing this again?" he asked.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," I stated.
He looked at me out of the corner of his eye and then turned to look at Charlie making the line.
"I admire your determination and loyalty. You're a vault Swan, aren't you? You're full of secrets."
Oh yeah… he knew.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," I stated again.
"Right," he said.
Charlie had our boarding passes and was making his way towards us.
"Be careful Bella," Damon said quietly.
"You're asking me to be careful?" I asked him a little surprised. Wasn't this the guy who merely a few hours ago had asked me to be stupid?
"Yes. I'd hate to see Elena lose the only person who she can relate to. She's been through enough already," he whispered quickly.
I looked at Charlie coming over to us and whispered back to him, "I'll try, but I'm not making any promises."
Damon gave me a small nod that I knew Charlie couldn't be able to notice from where he was standing.
"Make sure you get your shots before coming home, you don't want to bring an infestation of fleas with you," he said with disgust.
"I'm not bringing fleas back."
"I sure hope so," he said with an obvious fake smile and then added, "Just be careful okay? And don't forget to have fun… well, as much as you can under the circumstances," he said while rolling his eyes.
"I'll try," I said quickly, Charlie was a few feet away from us.
We said goodbye to Damon and made our way through the airport. We waited for our flight, apparently it was a bit delayed and ended we up getting on the plane around midnight. We would arrive in Port Angeles around five a.m. It was going to be one long flight.
I was putting my seatbelt on when Charlie turned to me, "Jake's picking us up at the airport once we get to Port Angeles."
I looked up at him surprised, "He is?" I asked.
"Yes, I spoke with Billy while I was waiting in line to check us in. He told me Jake would be there waiting for us."
"Did you call and tell him our flight was delayed? I know he hates to wait around," I told him.
"Yes, I called and let them know."
I nodded and let my head rest on the chair. Suddenly I really hoped that this flight was long. I had no idea what I was going to tell Jake about Charlie finding out. I had to figure it out, and I had five hours to do so.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-
We were waiting for our bags. Any minute now and I'd have to face Jake. I didn't understand why I was so nervous about seeing him, it wasn't as if I had gone up and told Charlie about him and the pack. Maybe it was my lack of sleep from the days before. I hadn't slept at all during the flight and not to mention I had only slept a few hours yesterday morning. I felt tired and groggy. Five hours of flight and I hadn't come up with anything.
Once we had our bags we walked to doors of the airport. It was already light out, but the rain clouds made it dark.
As soon as the doors opened I felt the dampness in the air hit my face, and that familiar smell of rain invaded ran though me. Yes, we were back, and for some reason I felt as a heavy load of an invisible something was put on my shoulders.
"Jake!" Charlie called out. I was lost in thought as I heard him. I lifted my head and saw Jake leaning against his old Rabbit, he was wearing a light t-shirt and shorts. He looked up at Charlie and me and gave us a small nod. He didn't smile, he was very serious.
We made our way up to him and once we were a few steps away from him Charlie walked up to him and gave him a hug. Over Charlie's shoulder he studied me. Charlie let him go and glanced over to me and then back to Jake uncomfortably.
"I'm gonna put these in the trunk," he said quietly. Jake nodded and took the small suitcase from my hands.
He didn't even say hello. This was a weird place for us. I felt as though it was the whole werewolf transformation period all over again.
We got into his car and he quickly turned it on.
Awk.ward.
Charlie looked awkward in the front seat, and I could see him trying to look back at me from the corner of his eye.
"You finished the Rabbit, it looks great Jake," he said, trying to make conversation.
"Thanks," Jake said coldly.
Okay…
"How's everyone holding up?" Charlie asked with concern.
"They're… coping," Jake said with his eyes glued to the road.
"Have they decided a date for the funeral?" Charlie asked.
"Tomorrow."
I sunk in the backseat and sighed. This was going to be one hell of a long ride down to Forks.
After Charlie asked Jake about the date for the funeral no other word was spoken. We drove in silence the rest of the way.
I had assumed that we were staying at the crappy motel in Forks, but according to what Charlie was speaking with Billy on the phone while we were on the road, we were staying with them, at their house in La Push.
Confrontation, there was definitely going to be some sort of confrontation in the next few days, or hours… there was no way we were avoiding it.
Once we got to the reservation we went straight to Jake's house. Billy was waiting for us at the door. Charlie got out of the car and slowly made his way to him. They looked at each other, sadness clearly written across their faces, and then Charlie leaned down and gave him a tight hug.
I looked over at Jake who had also stepped out of the car. He ignored me and looked to the other way. I opened the door and got out. I went over to Billy and told him I was very sorry about Harry. Billy just looked at me and nodded. His expression was very solemn. I knew he was upset with me too. First I had dated a vampire and now he thought I had revealed their secret.
Jake walked pass me carrying my suitcase. I followed him inside, he was heading to his room, apparently I was staying there.
I stood by the door with my arms across my chest. He was putting the suitcase on the bed.
"We need to talk Jake," I told him.
"You broke your promise Bella. We have nothing to talk about."
"You're blaming me for something that I didn't even do, and that I didn't quite understand what is was until yesterday morning Jake," I said irritated in a whisper. I didn't want Charlie and Billy to listen in.
"Oh really? How the hell would he have found out if it wasn't for you? Huh?" he was furious. He turned and walked over to me. I looked up at him, suddenly feeling very small next to him.
"He found about you because of this," I said as I opened my cross body bag and took out the book. I slammed it into his chest.
Jake took it and the looked at me irritated.
"Am I supposed to believe that Charlie suddenly believes in our legends because of a stupid book? He's heard the legends before! He's known about them for years! Why now Bella? Why would he believe them now?"
He was upset. Jake was very upset. I closed my eyes, I was scared about what I was about to do. I prayed that what ever came out of my mouth didn't wreck havoc and that more information than the one I needed to say came out.
"Charlie has been exposed to the supernatural," I said quickly and quietly.
Jake was quiet and then he spoke, "What? What is that supposed to mean?"
I looked at my boots, the ones I had not worn in three weeks, and that after stashing them in the back of my closet I thought I would never have to wear again. What was I going to tell him now?
"Well… it's his new job…" I said in a whisper.
"He's the chief of police in some small and crappy town in the middle of Virginia, how is that related to the supernatural?"
"Well… there have been some strange animal attacks there," I said as I made small circles with my left shoe.
"So?" he asked aggravated.
"The bodies were drained of blood Jake," I said as I slowly raised my eyes and let them meet his. Understanding came over him.
"What?" he asked silently.
I looked at him.
"You know what Jake," I said nodding.
"So… what you're trying to tell me is that…"
"Charlie know about vampires, and at least ten more people know about them in Mystic Falls. I don't have all the details yet, but I've been snooping around and I've gathered some information," I told him, trying to be convincing.
"What do you know so far?"
"Well… they're different from the ones we know about. They're very different," I told him.
"How different?" he asked intrigued.
"Apparently the common legends apply. They can't go in the sun and they have to be invited into a house… all that stuff."
"Are you sure about this Bella?" he asked concerned.
"Yes. Charlie has been acting weird since we got there. I went into his study and found a bunch of files and read a few of them. It all checks out Jake," I said to him.
"Does the stake to the heart apply too?" he asked, I could see hate in his eyes.
Shit. No, this I was lying about. I didn't want Jake getting on a plane, or running to Virginia to go all Buffy on Stefan and Damon. No, this was a detail he didn't need to know. So I lied.
"I don't know Jake, I couldn't get all the info. But I do know that there haven't been any recent attacks. Maybe this means that they've moved on and the vampires are gone?"
"They're vicious creatures Bella, they're smart," he said looking into my eyes.
Jake was not believing my lie and I knew he wouldn't let it go, so I did the only thing I knew that would make him uncomfortable and that would make him drop the subject in an instant.
"Yes, I know that, but Jake once they get bored they leave," I said as I faked my voice breaking and let tears flood my eyes. My lower lip started trembling and I clenched my jaw. The tears fell from my eyes and down my cheeks.
Jake sighed and looked at me with worried eyes.
"Bells, come on, don't cry. I… I didn't mean to make you think about… I hate it when you cry over that idiot and his bloodsucking family. Come here honey, don't cry," he said as he took me into his arms and hugged my gently. I had forgotten how warm he was.
"You know Bells, that bastard will pay for what he did to you. I promise, I'll see to that," he said as I nodded against his very muscular torso.
He let me go and wiped the tears from my face.
"You should really get some rest, you look like crap honey."
I chuckled and nodded.
"We'll talk more about this later," he told me as he walked out of the room and closed the door behind him.
I rubbed my eyes with my hands and got the rest of the tears out of my face. I laid down on his bed and put my hands beneath my head.
I should get an Oscar for that performance.
That was my last thought as I quickly drifted to sleep.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-
When I woke up it was almost three in the afternoon. Someone had put a blanket over me, I was tightly tucked in. My guess was that it was Jake.
I took some of my stuff out of the suitcase and went into the bathroom to take a shower. Once I was done, and I had changed into a clean pair of clothes I walked out of Jake's room and went into the living room. There was no one home. I decided to go for a walk.
I opened the door and put my hoodie on, it was raining. No surprise there.
I started walking towards the beach. I had always loved the smell of the ocean, even though I didn't dare go in and die of hypothermia.
Once I reached the beach I sat on an old log that was lying there. I looked to the horizon and took a deep breath of fresh air.
I guess I sat there thinking about nothing in particular for a while. I just watched as the waves came in and then shrunk right back. After a few minutes of staring at the horizon, I heard a footsteps against the sand and looked to my left. It was Charlie. He sat next to me and stared at the ocean too.
"How everyone Dad?" I asked.
"They're… holding in there," he said sadly.
"I know Harry was one of your oldest friends Dad, I'm really sorry about that," I told him honestly.
"Thanks kid," he said as he put his arm around my shoulder and rubbed my back.
"That was one weird drive wasn't it?" he asked.
"Yeah… I told you he was mad at me," I said glancing at him.
"I'm sure he'll get over it, and you'll sort things out," he said trying to make me feel better. He wasn't. I was feeling a little angry at him. It was his fault we were in this position in the first place.
"We talked a bit this morning, I think he'll get around it," I told him.
"That's good Bells, I'm glad."
We were quiet for a while, and I had a feeling that Charlie being here next to me wasn't for free. He wanted something and by the looks of it he didn't know how to approach me.
"Listen Kid, there's something that I've been meaning to ask you, but I've never done it because it's a delicate subject for you, and the last thing I want is for you to go back to that state that you were in last fall."
Please don't Charlie, please don't.
He was not going to ask me the question I was dreading him to ask me since I found out he had my book. He couldn't ask me about them.
"Dad, please don't," I begged him as I looked away from him.
"I need to ask you this. If it wasn't important I wouldn't be doing this," he said seriously.
"I don't want to talk about it," I said standing up and walking towards the beach.
"Bells, this is important," he called from behind me.
No Charlie please don't open the can of worms.
"I don't care Dad. We're not going there." I said getting irritated.
"We need to, I need to."
"Well… I don't, and I would appreciate it if you would respect that," I told him aggravated by his begging as I turned around to face him.
"Did they ever hurt you Bella? Did he ever harm you in any way? Did you notice anything weird or odd about them? Did they try to make you do things you didn't want to do?" Charlie asked rapidly. I knew he was concerned, and that probably these questions had been roaming through his head since the minute he had put two and two together about the Cullens.
"No Dad! No! They never hurt me, or harm me, and no they weren't weird. And the only thing I ever did against my will was let Alice try to give me a makeover," I answered furiously.
"Do you know where they are? Can I contact Carlisle?" he asked.
Oh my God the nerve of my father! Did he think that after last year I would want to contact them? Well… part of me did. But the other part of me, who had a little self respect didn't and knew otherwise. But did he even think that I knew how?
"No. I don't okay? They left Dad, and they didn't even bother to say goodbye to me. So no, I don't want to contact them, even if I knew how I wouldn't do it."
"Alright Bells, calm down."
"You want me to calm down after you make me talk about something I had no intention of mentioning ever?"
"I'm sorry kiddo I just wanted to make sure," he told me with a frown.
"Why Dad? Why now? After almost a year, why do you ask me now?" I needed him to tell me what he had found out in this past few days, and one way or another I would get him talking.
"I… I… I don't know Bells, I just wanted to make sure…" he said stuttering.
"Make sure of what? You've been acting weird lately Dad. I'm honestly worried about you. You have been jumpy, and nervous and irritatingly over protective."
"You don't have to worry about me, I'm fine," Charlie said, he became very serious all of a sudden.
"Are you sure? Cause you really don't look like it," I asked him trying to get something out of him.
"I am… I… I have to go to the Clearwater's, I'll see you for dinner Bella," Charlie said avoiding my questions. He stood up and walked back towards the reservation.
I was so angry at Charlie. There he was trying to get information out from me but refusing to let me do the same with him. Although I already knew what was bothering him, it made me furious that he tried to trick me into telling him about why the Cullens left.
I took a rock and out of anger threw it into the water. I put so much strength into it that I twisted my ankle and fell back on the sand.
I was very frustrated. Charlie and I had never had a fight like this one. I had never been so angry with him before. I looked to my right and saw Jake standing on the highest point of a hill that was near by. He was watching me closely. He gave me a nod and then a small smile and before I knew it he was gone.
Jake had witnessed my fight with Charlie.
I sat on the beach trying to get myself together and trying to calm down before heading back to Jake's house.
My phone started buzzing. I had received a text message. The number that had sent it was private, and I couldn't know whom it was from until I saw it, so I opened it. The message said:
"Rabies: An acute viral infection of dogs, wolves and other carnivores, transmitted to humans by the bite of an infected animal. Rabies is marked by an increase in saliva production, abnormal behavior and eventual paralysis and death. Get your shots. Be careful"
I didn't need to know whose number it was to know who had sent me the text. It had Damon written all over it.
I decided to ignore the text and not answer it back with a bitter comment. The last thing I wanted right now was to speak with Damon and his bipolar self.
After fifteen minutes of staring out into the ocean trying to relax my cell started ringing. I looked at the caller ID it said "Private Number".
"Can't stand being ignored can you?" I said under my breath as I ignored Damon's call.
After it stopped ringing a few seconds went by and it started ringing again. I ignored it.
After the fifth time the phone rang I decided to get him off my back and answered it.
"I'm ignoring you Damon, can't you get a hint? I don't want to talk right now," I snapped at him.
"Umm, okay, it's not Damon, this is actually Stefan."
I shut my eyes tightly and quickly hit my head with my right hand, this was embarrassing.
"Elena and I just wanted to make sure you were alright. We'll talk when you feel like it then," he said.
"Oh my God Stefan I'm so sorry I snapped at you like that. I just had a fight with Charlie and Damon just texted me and he knows exactly how to get on my nerves, and I was just trying to avoid speaking with him," I tried to explain.
"I'll speak with him if you want," he told me with concern.
"No, that's okay. There's nothing you can do about it anyways. Damon does what he wants."
"Are you sure?" he asked.
"Yes."
"So everything's okay?" he asked with apprehension.
"Up until now, yes. I'll let you guys know if something out of the ordinary comes up."
"Please do. Damon filled us in and we're worried about you," he explained.
Right… they knew about the wolves now.
"You have nothing to worry about, I can assure you of that," I told him.
"Still, let us know if you need anything."
"Okay Stefan. Thank you."
"You're welcome Bella."
"Say hi to Elena for me."
"I will. Take care of yourself," he said and hung up.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-
Last night, dinner had been quiet. After it got dark outside and a little too chilly for me, I had headed back to Jake's house from the beach. When I got there, Charlie was helping Billy set the table.
Jake had not been there, he had rounds, or so I assumed by his absence. It was just Charlie, Billy and I. The three of us sat silently and ate our dinner. I never left my eyes off my plate. I was still too mad to look at Charlie. No one spoke, no one made a sound.
After finishing my food I took my plate into the tiny kitchen and washed it. I had then proceeded to go into Jake's room and let myself crash on the bed and fall asleep almost instantly. I had not realized how tired I actually was.
Today I was woken up by Jake's big and warm hands gently taking the strands of hair that had fallen on my face and pulling them away. He quietly told me to get ready, we where heading over to Emily's before the funeral.
I quickly showered and put on the funeral appropriate outfit I had brought for this occasion. Once I was ready he told me not to bother having breakfast, Emily had prepared something for the pack and I had been invited.
We walked to Emily's in silence. It was early and it was still somewhat dark. The sun had not completely come out yet. By the looks of it today would be one of those very few and unlikely sunny days in the Olympic Peninsula.
I was greeted by a very solemn and sad pack of wolves. They weren't their effusive and overenthusiastic selves. They were all pretty shaken up about Harry's death. I could tell.
Embry and Quill received me with a tight and warm hug, lifting me up while doing so. Sam gave me a small smile and Emily embraced me with a gentle hug. Paul wasn't there. He was on duty, Sam had informed me.
Jake had told them about what we had spoken about the day before, and about the fight he had witnessed I had with Charlie yesterday. Apparently this proved to them that Charlie had not learned directly from me about their secret.
I had asked them the question that seemed to have disappeared out of my mind for the past week but that had entered my thoughts since we had landed in Port Angeles. I had asked them about Victoria. The told me she was still around. She kept coming back every few days. They had not caught her yet, but there had been a few times on which they had been very close. They promised that I had nothing to worry about, and that I could be sure that they would take care of that situation. I was confident that they would.
In Jake's words, "They were taking the bitch down."
The funeral was like what I expected it to be. There was a Quileute ceremony and then we headed to the Clearwater's for a little while. I had avoided Charlie the whole day, and I was planning on doing so until I could gather the strength to speak to him again.
Jake and I had left the Clearwater's a little after four. We headed back to his house. Instead of going inside he had guided me into the garage. Under a big dusty and oil stained sheet was my truck. I didn't have to take it off to know that it was. I could see the rusty worn out red paint, the sheet didn't cover it completely. I felt a small pull towards it. How I missed this old beast.
Jake didn't want to show me the truck though. He went straight to the back and effortlessly carried out one bike after the other. We were going riding. This bike I could actually handle.
I got on mine while Jake got on his and put on my helmet. I turned the bike on and drove out of the garage. Jake was quickly behind me. We drove out of the reservation onto an old road that no one really used anymore.
I liked feeling the cold wind hit my face, and I found myself trying to make this old bike run a little faster. Yep, this was no Ducati.
We had stopped on a hill that overlooked the whole reservation. I could easily make out where Jake's house was, and far on the distance I could see Emily's house too. Jake had been oddly quiet the whole afternoon. He was in deep thought. I had missed having him around.
"Wow, this view is beautiful Jake. We have never been here before," I told him breaking the silence.
"Yeah, I know," he agreed while looking at the scenery.
I turned to him and gave him a small smile he smiled back.
"So… tell me about Mystic Falls," he told me.
"Well… it's a small town. A little larger than Forks, I think. Very historic place. Lot's of civil war history there."
"Do you like it?"
"Yeah, I think I do. It's nice being able to start over and just have a clean slate," I told him as I put my hands inside the pockets of my jacket.
"Are you and Charlie all settled in your new house?"
"Yeah… we are."
"Do you like it?"
I chuckled, "It's yellow."
Jake laughed, "What?"
"Yeah… Charlie bought a yellow house," I said in between chuckles.
"You'll have to send me pictures, I can't believe that until I see it."
"I will, I'll do that," I said nodding.
"What about friends? Have you made any friends?"
"Yes, I have. I'm happy about that. The girl who lives across the street from us, Elena. She's very nice, and we are in the same grade at school. We have most of our classes together. We get along quite well. She's kind of like the popular girl in school, but she's very simple and grounded, not snooty at all. She's introduced me to a bunch of people."
"She sounds nice," he said with a small grin.
"She is. Mostly I hang out with her and her boyfriend Stefan. Eventually we hang out with Stefan's brother Damon. Well, actually he hangs out with us. He tends to appear out of nowhere and uninvited. He's a bit of an ass and tends to get on my nerves. Charlie trusts Damon a lot."
"So he's in that council you told me about?" he asked.
"I believe so, yes."
"Maybe it's good that you hang out with the guy. If these vampires actually exist, and he knows about them, maybe he can protect you in some way or another."
Oh Jake… if only you knew.
"Yeah… maybe."
I was not carrying on with that subject.
"I'm glad you're adapting well Bells," he said as he came over to where I was standing next to my bike.
I sat on it and looked up at him. He was looking at me intently. I got a little uncomfortable and looked down to my feet.
"I've missed ya Honey. This place isn't the same without you tripping all over," he said chuckling.
"Aw Jake, I've missed you too," I said as I gave him a small punch on the arm.
He chuckled and came closer to me. The wind blew and messed up my hair. Jake laughed and tried taking it out of my face and tucking it behind me ears. He took his hand and gently caressed my face. He leaned closer to me and the next thing I knew his lips were on mine and he was kissing me.
I froze. I didn't know what to make of this and I didn't know how to make him stop. He took my face in his hands and held me close to him, and as much as I tried to back away from him the more he pulled me closer. I was sending him mixed signals and he was interpreting them in the way I didn't mean him to. So I knew that by fighting it I wouldn't make him stop and I let him kiss me without kissing him back.
Jake kissing me was weird, it was very warm and he was passionate. Both things I had never experienced in a kiss before. My experience with kisses dictated coldness, and chaste delicate touches.
Once Jake had finally stopped and had released me from his strong grasp I stared at him back at his wondering eyes.
"Are you done?" I asked coldly.
He nodded quickly.
"Good," I said as I pulled my arm backwards with all the strength that I could master and then punched his face.
I screamed. He didn't even flinch.
My hand was throbbing.
"SHIT!" I screamed as I grabbed my right hand with my left and applied pressure to it. I felt as if it weighed a thousand pounds.
"Bella? What was that for?"
"What was THAT for? You kissed me Jake!" I yelled at him.
"And you liked it," he said.
"No Jake, I didn't. I generally don't like being forced into kissing someone," I told him irritated.
"Forced? You kissed me back!" he said, I could tell he was hurt by my choice of words.
"No Jake, I fought you back, but you misinterpreted that."
I looked at him, he was angry and I was angry too.
We heard a wolf howl in the distance. Jake clenched his jaw and hands.
"That's Sam, I have to go," he said angrily.
"Go," I said coldly.
I rolled his eyes and ran into the woods that started at the end of the road. I didn't look as he went in, but I heard the sound of clothes ripping and then a loud bark as footsteps ran into the forest.
I got on the bike with my hurt hand clumsily drove back to Jake's house, where I knew he wouldn't be for a while. When I got there, Charlie and Billy were sitting outside having a couple of beers.
Charlie clenched his jaw and his brows closed together as he saw me pull in on the bike. He immediately stood up. I took my helmet off and looked straight into his eyes. I was not taking any crap from him about the bike.
"What the hell Bella?" he asked me with his hands on his waist.
I shrugged and rolling my eyes made my way into the Black's house. Charlie didn't even follow me. I left him standing out side the front door with his mouth widely open by my response.
I had never been so rude to my father before.
I made my way through the tiny house and locked myself up in Jake's room. I sat on the bed and with my left hand I took my cell out of the pocket of my jacket.
Before I knew it I had texted Damon
You were right.
A few seconds later my cell buzzed and I received a text.
I know I was… I always am.
I scoffed. Obnoxious vampire.
I answered his text.
Do you even know what I'm talking about?
Buzz
No.
I laughed.
Buzz
That doesn't mean I'm wrong.
I rolled my eyes and sighed.
Buzz
Don't even think about rolling those big doe brown eyes.
How did he- I texted him back.
Know it all.
Buzz
;)
Buzz
Seriously, what happened?
I typed again.
Jake kissed me.
Buzz
Eww. Dog breath. Please say you've brushed your teeth with Clorox already.
I shook my head and answered his text.
Ass. I just got home.
Buzz
Go. Disinfect yourself. I'll call you in 5'
I found myself obediently brushing my teeth in the bathroom. Once I realized what I was doing I dropped my toothbrush and rinsed my mouth.
What the hell? I hadn't thought once that Jake's kiss had been disgusting. Why was I brushing my teeth?
My phone rang and I went to answer it.
"Spill," he ordered.
"I already told you what happened," I told him.
"And? Did you kiss the mutt back or what?" he asked.
"What? No. I punched him."
There was a brief pause.
"How's your hand?" he asked in monotone
"It's… okay."
"Did you break it?" He asked and I studied my hand. It was swollen, but nothing was sticking out.
"No…"
"Bella?"
"At least I don't think it's broken…" I confessed.
He laughed.
"Put some ice on it."
"Okay doc. I will," I said sarcastically.
"I heard you fought with Charlie."
I didn't answer him, and he didn't ask me anything. We were quiet for a few seconds.
"Yeah… he um… started asking questions about… about…"
"Them?"
"Yes," I answered.
"And?"
"I told him I didn't want to talk about it and he kept insisting. He started asking a bunch of questions."
"What did he ask?"
"If they ever hurt me, if I had noticed something weird about them…"
"And?"
"And I said they never hurt me."
"Only they did."
"No… the didn't."
"I don't mean physically."
I was taken by surprise with this comment. We seemed to be having a normal conversation. Without his cocky and ironic comments.
"I told him they were very normal," I said changing the subject.
"Yeah, except they sparkle like a disco ball in the sun, are cold as ice, hard as stone and feed on blood to live. Yeah… they're as normal as they come."
I spoke too soon. Mr. Arrogant Comments was back.
"Yeah I didn't tell him that part."
He chuckled.
"Good girl. Did that convince him?"
"I don't think so."
"I'll take care of it when you get back."
"Thanks."
"I have to go, we're dealing with a crisis over here."
"A crisis?" I asked confused.
"Yeah, you'll hear about it when you get back."
"Okay."
"Ciao Bella," he said and hung up before I could say bye back to him.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
I had waited for Jake to get home until almost three am last night. He never came home. I had gotten into bed around nine, and laid there thinking about what had happened that afternoon.
Jake had feelings for me. Jake had kissed me while taking a chance and actually acting on those feelings. I had punched Jake. Why had I punched him?
I wasn't expecting the kiss, true. But what he did wasn't wrong. I had overreacted and I had hurt his feelings, and my hand by doing so. I wanted to talk with him and set things straight. I wanted to apologize.
I love Jake, but maybe not the same way he loves me. If there's something I'm completely sure about right now is that I need to be alone. I need the time to finish getting myself together. I've started to mend, but there are still broken pieces and parts of me that aren't sown together yet. I need to concentrate on myself. That's my main priority right now.
I woke up late this morning. I took a quick shower and went into the kitchen. Jake wasn't home, and neither were Charlie or Billy. I made some coffee and went outside. I sat on the porch while I drank it.
It was chilly outside and little raindrops were starting to fall. It was a quiet morning, I guess everyone was working or at school. As I sat there, on the steps of Jake's house I started thinking about my conversation with Damon the night before.
Why had I called him and not Elena? Why did I suddenly decide to trust him?
Was it before he knew about Jake and him being a wolf? Did I feel comfortable speaking with him about it? Was it because even though he was an ass I could count on him to tell me the things I needed to hear?
Damon was arrogant, yes. But from the little time I had spent with him I could tell that he was honest. Maybe his intentions aren't clear, but there was no bullshit. He tells it as it is.
With him, and Stefan, I felt like they believed I could handle the truth about things. Not like with the Cullens. They hid things from me, and I hated not being included. Whatever was going on I could take it.
What was going on in Mystic Falls right now? What was that "crisis" Damon told me about last night? Had the other vampires returned? Had there been another attack? Whatever it was I was sure that when I got back I would find out. He told me I would. I wasn't sitting out anymore, I was being included in whatever was happening. This time I would make sure of that.
I finished my coffee and looked over to the garage. I stared at my covered truck and decided to go for a ride, I missed that old dinosaur.
I stood up and walked over to it. I took the oil-stained sheet and pulled it off. I sighed. How I missed driving it around.
I looked for the keys and found them hanging on an old rusty nail that was sticking out the wall of the garage. I climbed into the truck and put the keys into the ignition. It didn't start at first, but after a second try the engine roared to life.
I pulled out of the garage and drove out of the reservation. I had no idea where I was going. I just wanted to drive for a while. Stand behind the wheel and take control of my life for five minutes.
I let in the scenery and the wet pavement extend before me and just drove. I found myself entering Forks a while later. I slowly passed the diner where Charlie and I used to have dinner every now and again. My old friends were there. I saw Angela, Jessica, Tyler and Mike laughing. They seemed happy. It was as if I wasn't even missed. Then again, I had never actually given them the opportunity to really get to know me. And if they hadn't known me, how could they even miss me?
This was one mistake I was not making again. I was making friends in Mystic Falls, and I intended on working on those relationships and keeping them. At least with Elena. Elena got me, and I got her. She is the only person who I believe can actually understand me, I'm not throwing that away.
I kept driving through town. Watching people live their lives. I don't know how or why, but I ended up parked in front of our old house. There was construction equipment and materials laying all over the front lawn. The new owners were remodeling the house.
From the truck I stared out to my old bedroom window. The same window that Edward used to climb in every night.
How come Damon had to be invited in to our house and Edward hadn't? All vampires should be the same. That being invited in part should be programmed into each and every one of them, no matter the species.
I looked at that window and reminisced the countless times I had been happy to stand by that window and wait for Edward to climb in.
Now the only thing coming to my window was a persistent, relentless and pushy crow who craved attention.
I didn't notice when the woman came out of the house, I realized she was there once she had tapped on my window. I rolled it down.
"Hi there," she said smiling.
"Hi," I said awkwardly.
"You're Bella right?" she asked.
"Yes, I am," I said nodding.
She smiled to me and said, "I'm Kristin, we bought your house," she pointed back to the house.
I nodded.
"Would you like to come in and see what we're doing?" she asked.
"Umm… sure why not?" I answered.
"Great, come on in," she said as she walked back to the house.
I climbed out of the truck and followed her.
The house was a mess, there was dust everywhere. Kristin started telling me what it was that they wanted to do with the place. She showed me how they were redesigning the kitchen and how they had torn down a wall from the living room and dinning room to make it look more spacious and have what little light they could master into the house.
I didn't feel nostalgic at all. I liked what they were doing to the house. It felt… right.
"Would you like to see the upstairs?" she asked.
I nodded and followed her.
She took me into my room, my old room. We couldn't really go inside since they were working on it and there were no floors, just the base beams.
"We're stripping the wooden floors and painting them again," she told me as I gazed into my destroyed bedroom.
"They did need a new hand of paint," I said.
"Yes, they did," she said agreeing with me. She looked at me and opened her mouth to say something but then closed it again.
"What?" I asked.
"Well… I'm glad you came over, I've been meaning to contact you, but we've been so busy with the place that I haven't been able to."
"You have?" I was confused, why would this woman want to contact me?
"Is there something wrong with the house? I could give you my father's number and you can sort things out with him," I said.
"No dear, it's nothing like that," she said as she put a hand on my shoulder. She then said, "I think you forgot something when you left.
"I did?" I asked. I double-checked before leaving that we had packed everything, what could I have possibly missed?
"Yes," she said as she walked out the room and went down stairs again. I followed her.
"When we were taking the floorboards out of that room upstairs we found this," she said as she took a little box from the dusty kitchen counter and handed it over to me. I had never seen the box before.
"I… this isn't mine," I told her as I inspected the box.
"Open it," she told me.
I did as she told me and opened the small wooden box.
I gasped.
My heart started pounding.
I looked up to see Kristin and then glanced back to the open box again.
"See… I knew it was yours," she said and gently rubbed my arm.
"I… I… thank you," I told her automatically, I didn't even notice when the words came out.
"You're welcome sweety," she told me.
"I… I better get going" I said as I reached into my pocket for the keys to the truck.
"It was great meeting you," she told me.
"You too…" I said as I walked out of the house and jumped into my truck. I turned the engine on and drove out.
I didn't know where I was going. I was on autopilot. I didn't think. I just… drove.
I drove by the school, the police department, the hospital, the dinner and the grocery store. I didn't even notice getting to the end of town. I didn't notice when the truck on it's own made it's way off the road and into that other small one. I saw trees and tress slowly passing beside me.
And then… I stopped.
I was… tired. No, scratch that, I was exhausted. I couldn't keep on doing this.
I couldn't take one step forward and then take three steps backwards.
I was done.
I looked to the little wooden box sitting beside me. I inspected it. It was flawless. It had been carved on the top. It was made form a very dark and rigid piece of wood. It was beautiful, but I couldn't help feeling hatred towards it.
I took it with both hands and got out of the truck. As I closed the door I lifted my eyes and realized where I was, where I had driven with no recollection of wanting to do this.
I was at their house.
I had not been here since the incident with the paper cut. I hadn't been here since September. It seemed like ages ago.
I felt my heart shrink a little, and my stomach started to go into a knot.
I made my way up the stairs of the front door and looked inside from one of the huge window walls.
The house was empty.
I tried opening the door but for obvious reasons it was locked. How stupid of me to think I could actually get in.
I sat on the stairs and passed my fingers over the carving of the box.
I opened it.
There they were, my missing photographs, the CD Edward had made and the tickets Esme and Carlisle had given me for my birthday.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath in.
I stared at the picture. There he was, staring back at me in all his vampire glory. Seeing him in this picture meant I wasn't crazy, he did exist and I had not made him up.
God he was so beautiful.
Why? Why had he hidden these things from me? Why would he take them back?
I grabbed the next picture, it was Alice, Emmett and I. Emmett was hugging me tightly.
I felt tears beginning to form.
Not again Bella, please not again. I thought as I felt the tears streaming down my cheeks.
I had had enough. I know I had promised this to myself before but this time it was for real.
"This is the last time I'm crying for you," I whispered as I looked at the photos.
"I'm not crying for you anymore Edward Cullen. I'm done. You broke my heart, and shattered my soul. You ripped happiness from me, and ruined my life. Because of you I lost every ounce of dignity I had. You made me become insecure, and doubt myself. I had never felt so insignificant in my life, so worthless."
"But that is going to change. This self-doubting and unconfident Isabella is dead. I'm done with her. I'm done trying to fit the mold that you told me to. I hate being like this. I hate not being able to enjoy the small things. I hate having to carry your secret with me."
"You all made me feel trivial, and worthless. I was just a toy for you all. You pushed me around and I let you. Even you Alice, I was just a toy, a distraction from your boring eternal life. Emmett you made fun of me and laughed with my clumsiness, I amused you. Esme, was I another replacement child for you? Were you filling that empty void with me? Rosalie, I… thank you, you always portrayed what you felt and didn't lie to me, so thanks. Now I know… and I appreciate that you weren't part of this circus your family put on for me."
"I'm leaving this place, and I'm never coming back. I seriously hope you don't ever come looking for me again, even though I'm pretty sure you're not."
I took the cd and grabbed a rock from the ground. I didn't need a cd to remember the song Edward had written for me. It had been perfectly engraved into my head. The tune would never leave me, and it would haunt me forever. I put the CD on the ground and putting all my force into it, I smashed it with the rock.
"You guys broke me, and even though right now all I feel is anger towards you, there will always be a part of me that loves you. But the truth is as much as I love you guys, I have to love myself more, and to do this, I have to let you go. I'll go crazy if I don't."
I stood there looking at the broken CD. I still had the rock in my hand. I studied it, it was heavy. I lifted my eyes and saw the big house. Tears were still streaming down my face.
I closed my eyes and wiped my tears.
"It's over. I'm done."
And just like that I threw the rock at one of the gigantic windows. It didn't break, but it left a dent.
"What are you doing here Bella?" an angry voice said.
I jumped, I had been taken off guard and I had been scared.
I turned around and with my puffy eyes glanced back at him.
Jake was standing shirtless in front of the truck.
"I'm saying goodbye," I said looking at him.
His brows were frowned together and he walked towards me.
"Good," he said putting his hands on my shoulders. He then looked back and saw the box. He went over to the stairs and put the pictures inside the box and closed it. He handed it to me and gave me a small smile.
He leaned down and grabbed a large rock from the ground. He looked at me and then quickly turned around and threw the rock at the window.
It shattered to the ground.
He turned to me and smirked. I smiled back at him.
We got into the truck and I handed him the keys. I didn't want to drive.
"You shouldn't be wondering on your own. Specially here Bella, out of all places, you shouldn't be here," he told me.
"I know. I just don't know how I got here."
"Promise you won't come back here again," he told me.
"I promise Jake… I won't."
"I'm sorry about yesterday," he mumbled.
"No Jake, I'm sorry. I overreacted."
"I thought you felt the same way, I was stupid," he said as he shook his head and looked at steering wheel.
"No Jake, you weren't. I was sending mixed signals. It's my fault."
"So you don't feel the same way?" he asked.
"No… I don't" I said honestly.
He turned the engine on and drove out of the driveway.
"There is someone for you Jake. That person just isn't me," I whispered.
He was quiet.
"I'm sorry," I said.
"Sure sure," he said as he glanced over to me and gave me a weak smile.
We drove back to the reservation in silence.
For some reason, I felt like a weight had been lifted from me and I was ready to move on.
So? I know that Damon wasn't physically very much in this chapter but he was in there.
For the love of Damon REVIEW!