Home Fires
Chapter Fourteen
(Three Days Later)
Eliot parked the truck in the garage. Both Kenna and Sarah had fallen asleep after leaving the helicopter at the airfield. The both looked so innocent. Eliot chuckled to himself. He so knew better. Taking their bags he put them by the door. It had been a nice three days at the farm. They found an old pick up in the shed and between Kenna and Eliot they got it running in one morning. They road to town for some shopping and dinner. Sarah laughed for the first time in front of them. She had the sweetest giggle. They talked about Jodi and Charlie and Sarah's new brother and sisters. The girl seemed genuinely happy. Kenna let his sister meet the little girl via the internet. It was a really good three days. He climbed back into the truck leaned over and kissed Kenna.
"Mmmm peppermint." Kenna smiled, not opening her eyes.
"We're home darlin'." Eliot smiled.
"I guess that means its back to the real world." She opened one eye.
"For a little while." He kissed her again. "I had a good time with you and Sarah."
"You had your doubts?" Eliot looked over at the girl.
"No." He helped her out of the truck and woke up Sarah. "Hey kiddo."
"Are we home?" She said sleepily.
"Yeah sweetheart, we're home." Eliot whispered. "You can go back to sleep when we get upstairs." He lifted her out of the truck and before he set her down the girl wrapped her arms around his neck.
"Thank you." She said, kissed his cheek and pushed herself down and ran into the bar. Eliot was frozen. Kenna looked at the man who could lay eight men down in thirty seconds, floored by a child's kiss.
"You get all the girls with that hero thing you do so well Eliot." Kenna smiled. He turned to her and the look in his eyes would have scared anyone else.
"I'm nobody's hero." He ground out loudly. Turning he grabbed the bags and headed upstairs, leaving Kenna to wonder what just happened.
o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/
"Welcome home." Nate hugged Kenna as she walked into the bar. Hardison, Parker and Sophie sat at the table with him.
"Thanks." She pushed away from Nate and looked at her friends. "Thank you all for what you did for Sarah."
"No problem." Hardison answered.
"Where's Eliot?" Parker asked.
"He went to bring the bags upstairs. I'm going to head up too."
"Kenna what's wrong?" Nate asked.
"Nothing, just tired, I'll see you in the morning." Nate watched her go. Something was wrong. Kenna was never tense around them. Maybe it was the way things were left with Sophie but something was defiantly wrong.
o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o
Kenna found Topher and Sarah cuddled up in the spare bedroom fast asleep. She tucked the little girl in and stroked the cat for a minute before she headed to look for Eliot. He wasn't in the apartment so she grabbed a couple of sweatshirts and headed to the roof. She found him standing near the ledge by the herb garden. She stood and watched the sheer perfection of him. The way he controlled a room from the moment he entered it always amazed her. He lifted the beer bottle to his lips and it sent a chill down her spine.
"Are you just gonna sit there and stare Kenna Shane?" He said without turning around.
"I was just enjoying the view." She walked over to him and put her arms around his waist and laid her head against his back. He didn't relax into her like he normal did. He was stiff and cold. "What's wrong?" She whispered.
"What you said before got me thinking." He didn't say anymore. Eliot looked out over the city.
"You've always been my hero Eliot." She ran her cheek over his back. He turned and pushed her arms length away.
"I did what I did because I loved you Kenna. It was for purely selfish reasons. That's not a hero." Kenna looked at him. His hands gripping her upper arms almost painfully. He noticed what he was doing and let her go.
"Selfish or not Eliot, you did it because you're a good man." Kenna crossed her arms over her chest and hugged her self.
"Kenna I haven't been a good man since I stole your virginity twenty years ago." Said with a sarcastic chuckle.
"You can't steal what's given to you outright Eliot James Spencer." Kenna shot back. She rubbed her hands over the red and swollen skin of her upper arms. "Why are you trying to make yourself something you're not?"
"I left Kentucky and never looked back Kenna. That should be enough to prove to you I'm not the man you want me to be."
"You are everything I ever needed Eliot. Then and now."
"How can you say that knowing everything I've done?" He looked back out across the city. "How can you trust me with a kid, knowing I've hurt people?" Kenna touched his arm. He tensed.
"You could never hurt us Eliot." She took a step back. "I'm going to leave for Kentucky in the morning to bring Sarah. I thought we'd wait for Thanksgiving but…you need some time to work out whatever it going though your mind." He didn't turn around. Kenna turned and headed inside. "Sophie wins." Kenna whispered to herself.
o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o
"Are you out of your ever loving mind?" Hardison stood in front of Eliot as he sat at the table in the corner of the bar. Eliot looked at him with cold blue eyes. "I knew you were a cold son of a bitch but I thought she meant more to you than that."
"Hardison, what the hell are you talking about?" He took a long drag from his beer.
"You're just letting her walk."
"Kenna is a big girl Hardison. Delusional at times but a big girl none the less. She knows what she's doing."
"Yeah she's leaving your sorry ass as we speak."
"She's going to Kentucky Hardison, not Timbuktu. She'll be back." Eliot really didn't care right now. His head was so full of bad memories and even worse sins that he wished Kenna would go to Kentucky and never look back.
"You need to talk this out. Aren't you the one always sayin' that's the best way?"
"We can't talk this one out." Eliot looked down at the table. "Just let it go, okay."
"Your not going to let her win are you?"
"Who?"
"Sophie man, you can't let her win this." Eliot looked at his friend.
"Sophie has nothing to do with this." Hardison shook his head.
"What does it have to do with?"
"Kenna sees me as something I'm not."
"The way I see it, you're everything to Kenna."
"She needs more than I can give."
"Eliot, she's carrying your baby man. I think you've given her pretty much everything you've got." Eliot closed his eyes and shook his head.
"I just can't do it." Hardison looked at him.
"You do what you have to but think it through man. Remember what the two of you went thought to get to this moment. Think about your baby." Hardison got up. "Think about your family." The hacker looked into the cold blue eyes of the hitter. "She's what you've been fighting for your whole life. Don't let those bad memories spoil all the good ones." Hardison walked away. Eliot slammed the rest of his beer and headed up to his empty bed.
o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o
Kenna stood looking out the bedroom window. The crib had been delivered sometime while they were gone and Parker had said that they waited for Eliot because it was something a daddy should do. Kenna tried not to cry but the tears welled up in her eyes and spilled onto her cheeks. Sliding down the wall she hugged her legs to her stomach and began to shake. Eliot had bad days, she knew that. She knew that this would blow over but it still hurt none the less.
"Kenna?" Sarah's voice broke through the darkness. "Kenna, are you okay?" The little girl came to her.
"I'm okay sweetie." Kenna wiped her tears. "Go back to bed."
"I'll go get Eliot." The girl got up. Kenna grabbed her hand and stopped her.
"No, I'm fine. You go back to bed."
"Are you sure, I can go get Eliot."
"Eliot's gone baby." Kenna stood. The fluttering in her stomach made the tears start again. "Go to sleep. We'll leave for Jodi's and Charlie's in the morning."
"I thought I was going to stay here till after Halloween and Parker's birthday." Kenna touched the child's hair.
"It's better this way. You can get started with school and make new friends."
"Please. Just till Parker's birthday." Sarah begged. Kenna looked at her.
"Okay, but we'll go to the farm." She answered. "Get some sleep." Kenna tucked in the girl.
"Thanks Kenna." Kenna nodded and headed out of the room. She hoped that Eliot had gone to bed and she wouldn't have to face him tonight but he was standing in the kitchen with his hands on the counter. He looked up at her. Again she wasn't afraid. Just sad.
"I hurt you and I'm sorry." Eliot looked at her. "I can't be your hero Kenna."
"You already are." She stood, arms crossed over her chest. "If what you've done makes you a bad man, what does that make me?" Kenna felt the tears well up again. "I've hurt people too Eliot. I've been to the places you've been to, done the things you've done. What does that make me?" He looked at her.
"You did it for all the right reasons." What reasons did he have for stealing for the highest bidder? Purely selfish. After the Ranger's threw him under the bus, what was he suppose to do?
"You did too¸ and you do now. Haven't we gone through this over and over? The past is the past."
"What are we going to tell her about us?" Eliot motioned to Kenna's expanding abdomen. She moved her hand down and stroked the bump she had marveled over for the past few days.
"That we love her." Kenna looked into his eyes. "That we love each other. Has that changed?"
"You know it hasn't." His voice was soft but his eyes were still full of hate. Not for her but himself.
"Then we still have a chance to work this out." She turned and went into the bedroom. Eliot watched her walk away for the second time tonight. He knew that he needed to fix this before she walked out of his life for good. Finishing his beer he headed to try and salvage what was left of his relationship with the one person who understood him.
o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o
Kenna looked in the mirror. Her puffy eyes and red nose glowing in the florescent light of the bathroom.
"You can do this Kenna Shane." She whispered to herself. "You've faced men with guns and woman with beer bottles. Eliot loves you for some God forsaken reason, so make him see what you see in him." Running the cold water Kenna cupped her hands and leaned over dousing her face in the frigid liquid. When she stood straight and looked into the mirror Eliot was behind her. There was something different in his eyes. Fear. He looked at her upper arms. The bruises were just starting to form.
"Oh God." He reached for her and she didn't flinch. "You should be scared of me."
"I could never be afraid of you Eliot." She turned and looked at him. "You have never hurt me on purpose. You've always made me feel safe."
"Till now." He said Horsley. She shook her head.
"This …" She pointed to her arm. "was raw emotion Eliot. It's nothing."
"I hurt you." There was a panic in his voice.
"No, you could never hurt me Eliot." She touched his cheek and kissed the stubble on his chin.
"But I did." At the sound of her father's voice the baby started her dance for him. Kenna reached out and put his hand on her.
"Have faith." She whispered. "Just this once." The tears welled up in her eyes again. "Have faith in us." He pulled her into his arms and held her close. He didn't know if it was faith or what it was but he needed her in his life. Needed them. "Have faith in her."
"I'm sorry." She held him close.
"Never be sorry for talking it out cowboy." He knew she was right. If they talked, they could figure anything out. Maybe if he would have talked more and fought less it wouldn't be so hard to let himself be happy.
"I love you Kenna Shane." He whispered in her ear.
"Don't you forget that Eliot, ever." She pushed him back into the bedroom and proved that make up sex was the very best kind of sex, ever.