Greetings again, my loyal fans! Sorry I haven't updated lately, work's been hectic. Some of you may have noticed that I posted the Cameos Christmas Special. Funny on how only one person has bothered reviewing. This displeases me, and thus, Floating Skull has devoured ten more souls.

Flt. Sk.: Floating Skull at last agrees! It truly is the most wonderful time of the year! The souls were plump with holiday cheer, and Floating Skull enjoyed every juicy bit!

B.B.: Dude! You're grossing me out here! Anyway, I spent the holidays with my friends at Titan's Tower.

Ght. Flx.: I be 'sizzlin with fellow pizzles at the grand sokizzle! I met a fizzle who now be my homie!

B.B.: Ghetto Felix says he went to a ghetto convention, where he met one of DRX9's associates, GhettoRaiderX8.

Yes he did. Now let us never speak of this again. In any case, some of you may have noticed a relation between Ghetto Felix and the character Felix from the last chapter. This is because Ghetto Felix is in fact a ghetto clone of Felix. To find out how this happened, read chapter 7 of my Golden Sun story, Pointless Arguments.

Enough, enjoy the chapter, and review! Or else…

Floating Skuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuull!!

-

Forest Temple

"PSI Freeze Omega!" shouted Paula as she unleashed an icy wave against Link and Ivan. Link used Din's Fire to nullify the attack while Ivan used Whirlwind to deflect it towards a wall. Navi hid safely within Link's hat.

"You two are trickier than I thought," growled Paula. "But I know how to deal with you!"

"Bring it!" shouted Link. Behind him, Ivan readied his staff.

"PSI Magnet Omega!" Strange streams of light shot out of Link and Ivan and into Paula. Within seconds, Link could feel its effects.

"My magic!" he exclaimed. "It's gone!"

"My Psynergy's gone too!" agreed Ivan. "She must've drained it!"

"I'm not done yet! Shield Beta!" Silver light wrapped around Paula, making her glow slightly.

"What's she doing?" asked Link.

"One way to find out!" Ivan rushed up and struck the side of Paula's head with his staff. As she was knocked down, Ivan too felt a sharp blow to his head. He cried in agony and looked around. Seeing no one, he retreated to Link's side.

"Ivan, what's wrong?" asked Navi from her hiding spot.

"I'll tell you what's wrong," replied Paula. "My Shield Beta cuts all physical damage to me in half. But half of the damage that is dealt is reflected onto the attacker. And don't even bother with projectiles!" she added, seeing Link draw his bow. "Same problem!"

"How can we beat her without getting pummeled," asked Ivan, still nursing the side of his head.

"We've got to play smart," answered Link. "I've only got six hearts left, and I forgot to stock up on faeries before coming here."

"What about the faeries in the mini-boss chamber?" inquired Navi.

"The jars were broken during the fight, and the faeries fled. Anyway, listen up." Link drew closer to Ivan and dropped his voice to a whisper. "Distract her for a few minutes, I've got a plan."

Ivan nodded and ran past Paula, stopping about ten feet on her other side. "Hey Paula! Why did the chicken cross the road?"

"So it could DIE! PSI Fire Omega!" ravaging flames flew from her body and streamed towards Ivan. Luckily, Ivan had trained long and hard with Garet, a Mars Adept, to dodge fire, and his training paid off once again. He effortlessly weaved in and out of the spewing flames, but he was gasping for air as the last fire died down. Grasping for ideas, he made an observation.

"Hey, how come you only used a Beta move for your PSI Shield?" he asked.

"Shield!" scorned Paula. "Not PSI Shield! That's for PSI attacks, while Shield is for physical." Ivan smiled; he had gotten her riled up. "And to answer your question, Shield Omega does the same thing, but hits all my party members. As I am fighting alone, Beta sufficed. No need to waste my PP needlessly."

"PP?" asked a confused Ivan. "You have that?!"

"Yes, of course I…" Paula gasped as she realized what Ivan meant. In a fury, she rushed over to Ivan and slapped him hard, sending him flying. "PP stands for Psychic Points you pervert! Now you die for sure this time! PSI…"

But she never got a chance to finish as Link began running around her with a chain. Upon observation, Ivan noticed that it was the Hookshot, and that the tip had been planted firmly in the ceiling. Within seconds, Paula was bound.

"This means nothing!" she screeched. "I don't need to move to use my PSI!"

"I know," agreed Link. Before Paula could act, Link stuck a pair of headphones on Paula's head and turned on the CD Player it was connected to. Paula began screaming incessantly. With his free hand, Link plugged one of his ears, while Ivan and Navi were able to do both. After about a minute, though it seemed like hours to the listeners, Paula passed out, and the torch flared up with the blue flame.

"What was on that CD?" asked Ivan, rubbing his temples in an attempt to ease his headache.

"Nails on a chalkboard," replied Link as he removed the headphones.

"Nails on a…why on Earth do you have that?" demanded Ivan.

"Look, it's a long story," replied Link. "And trust me, it's not that interesting. Let's just say it came up once."

Ivan sighed. "Whatever."

"She's coming to," announced Navi.

Paula groaned and opened her eyes. "What happened? Where are the others?" Link quickly filled her in on the doings of Sephiroth and the battle that had just taken place. "Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry! Here, take these Magic Truffles." She reached into her back and produced two strange looking truffles. "They'll restore your magic."

Link and Ivan both accepted a truffle. They had a strange, if not unpleasant taste to them. The two warriors felt their magical energy refill in a rush. They thanked Paula and proceeded onward.

After some complications with the twisted rooms, Link and co. finally reached the room with the portrait of Jeff. After solving the block puzzle, Jeff appeared, surrounded by many machines. "So, you finally made it. I knew Poo and Paula would not be able to stop you. I've told them many times that science is far superior to their Psychic powers, and now I shall prove it!" He laughed loudly.

Link began to move, but Ivan held him back. Giving Link a look that told him to stay put, Ivan calmly walked up to Jeff. "I agree, science is truly a great force, but your machines all share the same flaw."

"Oh," said Jeff cynically. "And what might that be?"

Throwing his hands up in the air, Ivan shouted, "Plasma!" Four or five bolts of purple lightning struck his machines, causing them to short circuit.

Jeff frantically tried to stop it, but the machines inevitably exploded. Link and Ivan quickly fled the room, returning only when the noise died down. Inside, smoldering remains littered the room, and Jeff's body lay twitching on the ground. The green flame graced the torch once more.

"Damn," muttered Jeff as Link and Ivan tended to his wounds. "That never happened on Earthbound. I hope we never are forced to fight like that again, but I'll be ready all the same."

"That was disturbingly easy," remarked Link as the left the room.

"We had a lucky break, but normally, he's a force to be reckoned with," replied Ivan. "He has a machine that stuns enemies, one that blocks magic, and another that drains health." He ticked these off on his fingers. "But worst of all are his bottle rockets. Two or three of his Multi-Bottle Rockets can bring down some of the later bosses."

"How do you know all this?" asked Navi.

"The author wrote a fic awhile back where Jeff got the powers of Spiderman. It was a stupid, silly fic, but I was introduced as a muse in the fourth chapter, so it's not all bad," concluded Ivan. "Well, third chapter really. The first chapter consisted of nothing but a theme song."

"I'm glad this guy stopped being so stupid with his stories," commented Navi.

"Yes," agreed Ivan. "If this story had turned out like Spider-Jeff, we'd all be in trouble."

The trio re-entered the central room to find Ness awaiting them. Link smirked. "No trouble, I fought this guy plenty on Super Smash Bros. Just don't give him time for the PK Flash!"

Ness smirked. "That statement alone shows how little you know. You never did take the time to play Earthbound, did you?" Link shook his head. "Of the abilities I displayed in Smash Bros., I am only capable of PK, or PSI Flash. And I require no warm-up time. PSI Flash Omega!"

A brilliant flash overtook the room. Link tried to shut his eyes, but was unable to do so in time. He felt an overwhelming sensation overtake him, and tears started pouring out of his eyes. He tried to stop put he just kept crying. Through his blurred vision, he looked at Ivan to find him standing there, completely still. It was as though he was a life-sized statue. Link tried to assist Ivan, put felt a small object fly into the back of his head. Ignoring the new spurt of tears this caused, Link turned around to see Navi flying right at him.

Link ducked to the right and allowed Navi to fly right over him. "Navi!" he called. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know," she replied. "I feel really strange, and I just can't help myself." Navi rushed towards Ivan, hitting him square in the chest. Ivan tilted backwards, but not enough to fall. He swung back forward, this time with enough force to topple over, right on top of Navi. Screaming, she tried to flee, but wasn't fast enough to avoid getting caught under Ivan's torso.

Link turned back towards Ness and charged. At least, he thought he did. In reality, he ran headlong into one of the short, torch bearing walls. He crashed into it, the corner cutting into his chest. He fell over backwards, while trying to back away.

Ness walked over to Link and sneered over him. "This is really all you have? I would expect an adversary such as yourself to be immune to the PSI Flash. Oh well, I suppose with the author that orchestrated this story can't be bothered with little details like that. And now, for the finishing touch!" His eyes shut and he fell silent. Link felt a massive power began to surge.

"LINK!" came Ivan's voice. Link looked over at him. It was hard to tell, but it appeared that Ivan had turned his head towards Link, and was using every last bit of his strength just to talk. "Don't…let…him…" Ivan tried to finish, but his energy was exhausted.

Luckily, Link got the gist. He closed his eyes to prevent his blurred sight from misleading him. Instead, he focused with his mind, and gauged Ness's height and distance from him. Climbing to his feet, he struck Ness's head with the flat side of his sword. Ness dropped his pose and stumbled back, his energy dissipating. Quickly, Link jabbed the butt of his sword into Ness's gut. Ness's hands flew to the impact point, but he lost consciousness and fell forward. The fourth torch was relit with the purple flame.

Link stumbled over to Ivan and pried Navi out from under his body. Fortunately, the force of Ivan's body crashing into hers had rid her of her strange feeling. She flew over to Ness and tried to awaken him.

After several minutes, Ness finally opened his eyes. After noticing Link and Ivan, he rushed over to them and used his PSI Healing Delta. Link's eyes finally dried up, while Ivan's body regained feeling. The team thanked Ness and took the elevator down to the bottom floor.

"So," began Link. "What was that thing Ness was about to do?"

"His most powerful ability," answered Ivan. "He calls it PSI Rockin."

"Ok," said Link. "And that is...?"

"An extremely powerful non-elemental attack," explained Ivan. "He never used it in Smash Bros. so it's no surprise you never saw it. I found out about it in that fic I mentioned earlier."

The trio fell silent as the elevator arrived at the ground floor. After solving the riddle of the rotating room, the team entered the boss chamber. Proceeding up the circular steps, Link and co. saw a large, spider-like machine. Standing next to it was a short, fat kid.

"Hahahahaha!" laughed the fat kid. "You've finally arrived! I was almost worried that those puppets were too much for you."

"Who is this guy?" muttered Link.

"He's another Earthbound native," replied Ivan. "His name's Pokey. He used to be Ness's best friend until the Giygas incident. Pokey turned on Ness and sided with Giygas. He used this Spider-Mech during the final battle. In the game, anyway. In real life, he's just been jealous of Ness's popularity, while everyone hated him."

"Hrmph!" snorted Pokey. "Spurn me all you want! With Sephiroth backing me, this world is toast!" He leapt into his Spider-Mech, let the protective glass dome cover him, and started it up.

Crazy Kid With Guns
HEAVILY-ARMED POKEY

Ivan began by firing a Sonic Slash at Pokey. Unfortunately, when it approached, a force field appeared in front of Pokey's mech, blocking his attack. Link charged, but was beaten back by a barrage of lasers.

"Great," muttered Link. "Twenty seconds in, and I'm already out of ideas."

"Fools!" shouted Pokey. "There's no way you can penetrate my force field!" He pressed a button, and a gas started leaking out of a vent in the mech. The team was overtaken by a horrid odor.

"What…is…that?" stammered Link, trying to wave it away. "Poison?"

"No," gasped Navi. "It's flatulence."

"Feel the stench of Pokey's bean burrito!" laughed the obese boy, glad to finally be able to expel his gas.

"Cyclone!" shouted Ivan. A twister of wind blew the stench away. It leaked out through whatever ventilation system these temples must realistically have.

"Hey, Link," said Ivan after he stopped coughing. "You notice how his force field only covers his front side? Maybe he's unprotected in the back?"

"Unlikely," countered Navi. "He doesn't think we can get back there, so he's diverting full power to the front side. If he wises up, he'll be sure to spread out the effect."

"What are you insects whispering about down there?!" screamed Pokey. He fired another volley of lasers. In the time he spent dodging, however, Link had an idea.

"Ivan," he said quietly once the lasers ceased. "Focus lightning onto this arrow." He held out an arrow.

Ivan nodded. "Ray," he whispered. Lightning crackled from his hand and shot onto the arrow. Link then used his secret technique to bind the element to the arrow. Drawing his bow, Link strung the arrow and aimed directly at Pokey.

Pokey glared. "What's he up to?" he thought. "He's aiming at me, but his eyes dart back and forth." Pokey broke from his thoughts and prepared his lasers when Link veered to the left and fired his arrow straight into the wall. Pokey almost laughed until he felt a large electrical force consume his mech. Looking back, he saw the arrow jammed in the mech's backside. "But…how!?" he stammered.

"Simple, the paintings in this room are still functional, like in the fight with Phantom Ganon," explained Link. "Only this time, I used the portal to teleport my arrow, and all its velocity, directly behind you."

"Curse you!" shouted Pokey. "I'll be back! If there's ever a Cameos of Time 2, I will return and exact my vengeance!" At that point, the mech fell to pieces, and Pokey disappeared in a flash of light.

"You know, I didn't expect one hit to kill him," Navi commented.

"It's best not to question these things," replied Ivan.

Picking up the Heart Container, Link and co. stepped into the circle of light.

Link's Health
xxxxxxxxxx
xxx

Chamber of Sages

Link, Ivan, and Navi appeared on the central platform. Another light shone onto the Forest icon, and Starfire dropped down.

"Welcome, friend Link," said she. "It fills my heart with joy to know that you are okay. You have freed the Forest Temple from Sephiroth's grip, and have awakened me as the Sage of Forest. I present you with the Forest Medallion." Link looked up and saw the large, green medal descend into his arms. "Go now, the other regions of Hyrule need your help."

Link nodded. "I'm on it. I promise you, I will not fail."

"We will not fail," interjected Ivan.

Link smiled. "Yes, we."

As the white light overtook them, the trio heard Starfire's voice wishing them luck.

-

Well, there it is. Another dungeon down.

Flt. Sk.: Floating Skull is filled with disgust! This chapter did nothing but shamelessly promote puny author's first story, Spider-Jeff.

B.B.: You're just mad cuz he told everyone how Ness wailed on you!

Ght. Flx.: Fo'shizzle yo!

In any case, please read and review not only on this, but on the Cameos Christmas, or any other of my wonderful fanfictions. I believe Numdenu's already familiar with Pointless Arguments. Just click on my author name, and away you go!

Floating Skuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuull!!