I am so sorry for the wait! I was swamped with life and personal issues which made my brain refuse to work. To put all you lovely people at ease I want to inform you that I have NO intention to abandon this story :) Thank you all for reading and leaving reviews!
"There's so much more to you than you know. Not just pain and anger. There's good too. I feel it."
"You do know you are stress baking, right?" Natasha asked in bemusement as Salem fluttered around the large kitchen.
Salem stopped her movements of piling freshly baked cookies on a plate to glance over her shoulder and saw the redhead perched at the island table in the middle of the kitchen, with Echo slumbering at her feet, munching on a pilfered brownie. The Agent was dressed in loose gray sweatpants, a pastel pink camisole, and her auburn hair was pulled into a neat French braid.
"I am not stress baking," the blond muttered as she tried to make room for the new plate of cookies on the countertops that was covered in different sorts of cookies, brownies, and pastries.
Staring at the clutter, with Natasha looking at her with a raised eyebrow, Salem sighed and cradled the cookies to her chest as if to protect them from her troubled mind.
"Okay, maybe I am" she admitted and her friend hummed in agreement.
She jumped down from her seat and walked over to the small blond and gently pried the treats from her hands before leaning a flared hip against the stainless steel refrigerator. Despite Salem being upset with Natasha for not telling her the truth about the incident at the diner, the slender woman found herself not being able to stay mad at the woman. Barton had visited her late one evening begging Salem to talk to the melancholy assassin. Salem hated to admit that when she found Natasha, curled on the couch with red-rimmed eyes and dismantling a gun with more force than strictly necessary, she immediately knew that she would forgive the Agent. Salem would admit, however, that she felt a lot better with her friend back to keep her company. In return for her forgiveness, Natasha vowed to always be honest with her, and Salem couldn't help but to smile at the sincerity in her glittering bright green eyes. Natasha seemed to need Salem's friendship just as much Salem needed hers.
It warmed her heart to be able to call the infamous Black Widow her best friend.
"Want to tell me what's going on in that overanalyzing head of yours?" she urged with a small smile, and Salem momentarily regretted inviting her to hang out with her when she couldn't sleep.
Dressed in pajamas consisting of powder blue sweatpants and a simple white t-shirt, the young woman chose to stay up all night baking, she eventually gave her friend a very short version of what happened with her Soulmate, and Romanoff nodded along as if she knew the whole story already.
It figured the woman wouldn't let her mope around for long.
"Nothing is wrong," Salem stated, and avoided her friend's unimpressed face by ducking her head so her pale hair would shield her face, and stared at her royal blue painted toenails, but the force of her stare had her shoulders slumping in defeat only after a few heartbeats of silence.
As if sensing her defeat Natasha gently led her over to the island she was just sitting at and waited for her to talk. Fidgeting with the hem of her shirt, Salem searched for words.
"I don't know what to do," she eventually muttered and as Natasha waved her on to continue the slender woman quickly stood to pace around her kitchen.
"Bucky! He told me about his past and I had no idea what to say to him," she explained, indicating to the night a few days ago when she learned the truth about Sergeant Barnes, and pushed her glasses back into place.
She roughly smoothed a hand over her hair, that was left down, in a fit of agitation.
"I feel absolutely horrible for not saying anything after he basically laid his scars out for me to see, I should be able to say something," she continued while growing even more upset.
"So, because you didn't say anything to him you are stressing out?" Natasha asked while popping another brownie in her mouth, chewing thoughtfully as she listened.
Salem made a noise, something between a sigh, a whine, and a groan, before crossing her arms over her chest as her amber eyes dropped to stare at her bare feet once more.
"I'm his Soulmate, Nat. I should be able to offer some sort of comfort instead of running away with my tail between my legs," Salem whispered.
Suddenly her friend stood and gently rested her hands over Salem's slender shoulders.
"Just because you are Soulmates doesn't mean that you can magically make all his troubles disappear," she said softly and Salem sighed and wrapped her own arms around her friend's waist in a much needed hug.
The redhead seemed momentarily surprised before gingerly returning the hug and unexpected tears stung the young woman's eyes.
"I don't know if I can help him," she whispered brokenly, finally voicing her darkest doubt, and she buried her face on Natasha's shoulder as she fought back tears.
The two women were quiet, the only sounds were the radio used for background noise, and the small huffing noise of her pet Pitbull.
"I think you might surprise yourself," Romanoff said as she pulled away and smiled at the small woman with twinkling green eyes.
Steeling her nerves, Salem felt determination fill her as well as a sense of purpose.
"Then I have to go talk to someone," she stated firmly before spinning on her heel and marching to the elevator.
Salem quickly backtracked and slipped on her gray suede house slippers, leaving Natasha grinning as she picked through the sweets Salem baked, with Echo laying back down in his previous position. It was only when she was in the elevator, the bright lights making her squint and cool air making her shiver, that she remembered it was nearly three o'clock in the morning. Feeling heat rise in her cheeks at her brash behavior she was about to abort the ascent and head back when the doors slid open to Steve and Bucky's floor. Salem stood in silence in the bright steel elevator as she debated, in growing panic, what to do before she heard a voice call out from the living room. Swallowing thickly, she quietly crept towards the voice and was surprised to see Steve dressed in gray sweats and a blue t-shirt with damp hair sitting on the wide black leather couch sketching while Bucky sharpened and polished wicked looking daggers. They both stopped and stared at her when she poked her head around the corner.
"Salem?" Bucky asked in surprise as he blinked at her and Steve furrowed his brows in confusion as they both sat up in their seats.
"Uh, h-hi," she stuttered out softly and cleared her throat while shifting on her feet.
"May I?" she asked jutting her chin towards them in permission to enter the room, feeling increasingly awkward since the last time she spoke to them she was near shouting in anger and teary-eyed.
The soldiers quickly snapped out of their surprise and motioned her in and her cheeks heated as she hesitantly made her way into the large open space of their modern styled living room. She was momentarily distracted by the floor to ceiling window that showed the twinkling city lights in the moonless night sky. Realizing exactly how high they were up she immediately became nauseous. Tearing her gaze away from the beautiful, yet daunting view, she saw Bucky reach out to a slender remote and with a click of a button the window darkened until it resembled the other three walls. She was blinking in amazement before someone cleared their throat to get her attention.
"Is there something wrong?" Steve asked with a frown and Salem blushed again before nervously tucking a pale curl behind her ear and took a deep breath.
"N-no, I came to talk," she muttered and Bucky placed his dagger on the simple coffee table in front of him and looked ready to leave the room.
"To you…I, uh, came to talk to you," she hurriedly continued to Barnes.
A feeling of guilt bubbled in her chest at his shocked expression. Both men shot each other a look and when the silence dragged on Salem twined her fingers together in front of her stomach that was busy twisting into knots.
"I can come back at a later time," she offered quietly while taking a step back.
Barnes nearly tripped over himself when he took a few steps closer with a look of panic flashing across his features.
"It's fine, this time is just fine," he said in a rush and Salem nodded and Steve looked over them both curiously.
"I'll give you two some privacy," he offered while standing up and snapping his sketch book closed, not before Salem spotted a drawing of a familiar looking slender woman with a small toddler on her hip pointing at a duck waddling to a lake, and disappeared somewhere in the back.
Bucky began cleaning up his pile of knives and polishing cloths and Salem couldn't seem to tear her gaze away from him. He was clad in black track pants that hugged his thighs, a snug gray long sleeve Henley made out of soft worn cotton with the sleeves pushed to his elbows. His thick dark hair swayed against broad shoulders as he moved and his bright pale blue eyes were locked on his hands, she spotted a silver chain peeking out from the collar of his shirt and she was momentarily transfixed by the contrast of smooth tan skin and silver metal. She fought back the sudden urge to walk over and sweep his hair away from his face as he ducked his head. Salem swallowed past the lump in her throat when he finally turned back to her.
"You want to sit?" he asked quietly and Salem shook her head, feeling too antsy to sit, and he crossed his arms over the muscular expanse of his chest making the shirt tighten over the thick muscles in his arms.
They both stood there staring at each other for a few heartbeats until Salem couldn't bare his intense gaze and she lowered her light brown eyes to her hands which were twisting nervously together. The silence was heavy as she tried to think of how to form her words as all earlier determination faded away.
"Will you say something, doll?" Bucky muttered after what seemed like hours of silence.
Salem cleared her throat as her thoughts alternated between chaos and utter silence. Images flickered through her mind, of vicious experiments and cruel tortures, and at the center was Bucky Barnes with a blank cold face. His words from that night had haunted her relentlessly and it painted terrible pictures of gruesome murders and pain. Yet, the memory of her Soulmate cradling her to his chest while she sobbed and the absolute sincerity in his eyes when he swore she would never be hurt again pushed the darker thoughts away. She thought of his small smiles that she has seen him wear and how he touched her with feather-light hands as if afraid to bruise her. Salem also couldn't help but to remember the disgust and self-hatred that was etched into face as he talked to his past, of what he done, and that was the image that plagued her most. Pushing her glasses higher on her nose and she looked over at Bucky.
Her heart broke at his expression.
His pale eyes were filled with concern and worry, his handsome face lined with anxiety, and his large body was rigid. She took a few steps closer until he was within arm's length and looked at him with her head still spinning and heart beginning to gather speed in her chest. She gave him a small and reassuring soft smile.
"It wasn't your fault, Bucky" she said softly and would have laughed at his stunned expression if it wasn't such a serious topic.
"You had no control over what you were doing. It wasn't your fault, not one bit," she continued.
Barnes stared at her for a long time before glancing away, expression more tortured than she could bare to see on her Soulmate.
"I could've refused…could've done something instead of following orders like a dog," he sneered after a long stretch of silence, the harsh tone more pointed to himself than Salem, and the young blond gritted her teeth at his words.
Her heart hurt for her soldier, and in a rush of determination and stubbornness, she marched over to him and cupped the sides of his face with trembling hands while finally giving into the temptation of smoothing his hair from his face. The slightly wavy dark brown locks were thick and soft, contradicting his sharp eyes and the fierce frown he normally wore. His eyes fluttered shut instantly as if the feeling of her skin on his was too much to process. Her pale slender fingers smoothed across his beard stubble and she let her fingers trace the arch of his cheekbones. Goosebumps exploded across her skin as his body heat wrapped around her and the scent of gunpowder, mint, and fresh laundry filled her nose. His breath brushed against her pink cheeks and she tried to compose herself before she let her hand slide to his broad shoulders, the left more unforgiving than the right, making his eyes snap open to look at her. She then stood on her tiptoes to get them on the same level, even though she only reached his shoulders in the position and stared him in his eyes.
"They would have killed you," she stated, feeling her rapidly beating heart skip a beat as the words left her mouth, but her words didn't seem to faze him.
"At least I wouldn't have had to hurt people anymore," he admitted softly and her blood went cold at the truth in his eyes.
Suddenly burning anger and fear erupted inside her and her bashfulness evaporated.
"If you ever say that again, think, that again I swear to everything that is Holy you will not like the outcome," she hissed while curling her nails into his shirt and shaking him.
He barely moved, but the action made her feel a little better.
"It was not your fault," Salem stressed each word in a tone that could end any argument.
"Evil people made you do evil things and they all should rot for what they did to you. You did the only thing you could do, you survived! And I don't care if every single person I know tries to say otherwise, to me you are innocent! Because you are innocent," she continued with as much honesty and passion she could muster.
She couldn't bare thinking of Bucky feeling that way, it clawed at her heart, and she hoped that he would see and hear the truth in her words.
"You actually believe that?" he asked roughly and Salem nodded frantically.
"With every fiber of my being," she responded genuinely while staring at him with beseeching bright amber eyes.
Without a warning, not even a shift in his expression, Bucky surged forward and pressed his mouth firmly against hers. Shock had her jerking their mouths apart with her small hands braced on his chest to put some distance between them. His hands, one hot and one cool, slid into her hair and he tugged her against him as he once more slotted their lips together. Once the initial shock wore off Salem soon felt her eyes flutter shut at the feel of his soft full lips pressed against hers, of his hair drifting forward and brushing against her freckled cheeks, to his rough stubble rubbing against her chin as he pressed closer. She sighed at the pleasant feelings and her Soulmate chose that moment to deepen the kiss. His lips were soft, his mouth warm wet silk, and his kisses were hot and languid. His hands tangled softly in her pale blond hair and at the first brush of his tongue she jerked back slightly, but he chased after her lips and resumed their kiss. Heat soared through her veins as he pressed her flush to him, the feel of his hard body against hers had her shivering, and she twisted her hands, still curled against his shoulders, in his soft shirt to anchor herself against the powerful rush of heat that swept through her like a blazing fire.
Bucky let out a small groan as he licked into her mouth, claiming every inch of her, before letting his tongue roll against hers until she shyly began to mimic him. He growled, nipped at her lips, and she melted against him. Salem's heart thundered in her chest as blood rushed in her ears in a dull roar and her skin burned hot when she felt a warm rough hand cup her jaw and angle her face to deepen the kiss. She couldn't stop the moan that bubbled from her throat as her senses became overrun by the scent, smell, feel, and taste of her Soulmate. With a final nip at her lower lip, he broke the kiss and rested his forehead against hers, and Salem panted lightly while her head swam. He nudged her nose with his and she slowly blinked her eyes open to look up at him. Bucky's eyes glowed with warmth and the gentle way he looked at her stole any air she managed to drag into her lungs.
He kept his flesh hand against her back and he lazily traced the dip in her spine with gentle fingertips. His metal hand hesitantly lowered from her hair, one finger brushing against her cheek and she closed her eyes and lightly nuzzled her burning skin against the cold metal. He let the metal digits map the freckles on her cheeks and followed the curve of her jaw before tracing the seam of her kiss-swollen lips.
"You are so lovely," he murmured softly, as if he spoke any louder it would shatter the peaceful tender moment they had created, and she couldn't help the bashful smile that curled her still tingling lips.
She looked over his face, bright warm eyes and handsome face soft, and felt her chest warm at the smile that twitched at the corners of his full red lips and he brushed his knuckles across her cheekbones.
"I think I'm falling for you, Salem," he whispered before leaning down to kiss her once more.