FRIDAY-DAYS UNTIL PROM: 29-

Kurt warily entered his former cheer coach's office at the end of the day. She sat, chin on her hands, staring at him as he entered. He sat in front of her, swinging one leg over the other and clasping his hands at the knee.

"What is it you wanted Coach Sylvester?" Kurt finally asked after a few seconds of silence.

"You're not yourself today. I noticed the improvement immediately. But, Porcelain, what caused this change?" Sue questioned. Kurt shook his head slightly. "It has to do with the hobbit, doesn't it?" Sue sniffed disdainfully, "He is so short his hair smells like feet."

"We broke up." Kurt blurted, "And it was my fault, because I was a jerk, but now I think he's avoiding me, which I totally don't blame him for, and-" Sue held up her hand, and he immediately shut up.

"Well, then good for you. You'll do fine. I hope for his sake he meet someone new. They say opposites attract. I hope he meets someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured." Sue sighed, "Listen to me Porcelain, men are the downfall of the universe, look at all the screwed up men in the world, like Ronald Reagan, Gandhi and Will Schuester." Sue nodded thoughtfully, "We need more men like you, and Adolf Hitler, and Lord Voldemort, and Charles Manson in the world. Smart, intelligent individuals who plan to make the world a better place." she leaned forward, "Listen to me Porcelain, I like you. People say I've no taste, but I like you and someday you'll go far, if you catch the right train." she leaned back, satisfied. Kurt blinked.

"But I love him." he mumbled, before sighing.

"Would you like some cheese and crackers with that whine?" Sue rolled her eyes, "Get out of my office Porcelain." she commanded with a sigh.

"Have I ever mentioned how much I hate you?" Mercedes grumbled to Santana as she pulled her along. Santana rolled her eyes.

"I'm a bitch, everyone hates me, but that will change." Santana smirked, "You'd be shocked by how well jocks can clean up once they get out of the stupid jacket. Plus, Azimio isn't gonna know what hit him when he sees you." Santana promised.

"Of course. I'm hot." Mercedes stated like it was obvious, running her hands down her sparkly black and silver dress. Santana nodded her agreement, before hooking her arm in Mercedes, her other in Brittany's, and they left for their date.

"I can not believe you're forcing this on me man. That is so cruel." Azimio moaned. Sam rolled his eyes over his shoulder. Dave snickered.

"Man, come on. Mercedes is banging, you know, for a chick." he added when saw Sam glare at him.

"Dude, but she's a total bitch." Azimio groaned. Sam scowled at him.

"No she isn't, she's just protective." he defended, "And she doesn't like you." he added, completely nonchalant.

"What?" Azimio questioned.

"You never apologize to her boy, Kurt." Sam stated as if it should be obvious, "Plus, she thinks you're an ugly jackass." he added. Azimio stared at him.

"Did I do something to you?" he asked sarcastically. Dave snickered. Sam shrugged.

"Nah, we're cool." Sam chirped happily, "Now come on killer. We confided with Brittana, and you and 'Cedes match. Silver and black dress, matching your black shirt and silver tie. You're gonna rock her." Azimio snorted.

"Course I am!" he declared, "Come on now, ladies."

Blaine stared sullenly at the council at the Warblers meeting. David glared at him, silently telling him to cheer the heck up and contribute to the meeting. He sighed, standing. Fine.

"Council, if I may, I feel that we should-" The huge wood oak doors slammed up at the front of the hall, causing all the boys to jump. Blaine's eyes widened.

Oh shit. There stood the devil in a track suit, and she was staring right at him.

"Hobbit boy, out here, now." she commanded. Wes and David stood, probably about to defend him, but Blaine quickly shook his head, following Sue Sylvester out of the room. She turned to him when the doors shut.

"I can't seem to remember you name, and please don't help me, because I really don't care. You broke my star ex-cheerio's heart, and for that, I must break your confidence. I believe that you lack the crucial ability to think, see, and live clearly if you think avoiding Kurt Hummel was a smart idea. You are lucky that he is even interested in you, hobbit." Sue snapped.

"Stop calling me that!" Blaine demanded. Sue raised an eyebrow at him.

"If you don't like my opinion of you - improve yourself! But, seeing as you don't like Hobbit, I won't call you it, Bushy Eyebrows." Sue smirked, challenging him.

"Don't call me that either!" he growled, "My name is Blaine, and-"

"I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away." Blaine ground his teeth together, but decided against acknowledging that.

"And," he continued as if he hadn't been interrupted, "It was stupid of me to avoid Kurt, but-"

"I'm blonde, what's your excuse?" Sue asked with a raised eyebrow. Blaine finally snapped.

"Yeah, well it is such a shame you ruined such beautiful blonde hair by dying your roots black." he growled. Sue's eyes lit up, interested.

"There is no battle of wits between us boy, I don't fight unarmed opponents." Sue threw him a barb, hoping he would take her challenge.

"Don't you realize that there are enough people to hate in the world already without your working so hard to give us another?" Blaine snarled at her, "Kurt was the one that broke up with me, I can be mad as long as I like!"

"Grasp your ears firmly and remove your head from your ass." Sue sneered, "Porcelain is a great boy, he'll move on in a quick second."

"Please breathe the other way. You're bleaching my hair." Blaine insulted. "With who? We're in the middle of Ohio."

"You don't know the meaning of the word fear, do you boy? But then again you don't know the meaning of most words." Sue disrespected, "Sneaky gays fill the hall of McKinley. Lesbian McFakeBoobs, Tweedle Dumber, Trout-Face Beiber, Fatty Meathead, and who knows who else."

"I've come across decomposed bodies that are less offensive than you are." Blaine froze, eyes widening, "Shit! You're right! I need to talk to Kurt!"

"You're right, you do, Poster Boy for Birth Control." Sue shook her head, "Nah, too long, I'm sticking with Hobbit." she decided. Blaine rolled his eyes.

"Thank you." he stated sincerely.

"Don't thank me for insulting you. It was my pleasure and I believe that we'll get along fine as soon as you realize I'm God." Sue smirked. Blaine shook his head, before darting out of the room.

Azimio froze, eyes widening. "Holy hell." He managed, jaw completely unhinged.

"You okay, Az?" Dave smirked. Sam snickered as all Azimio managed was 'uh'.

"Mercedes!" Sam called, and the three girls turned around.

Well, look at that, Mercedes and Azimio could make matching faces.

"You're welcome." Santana whispered in Mercedes' ear. She shoved her forward, causing Mercedes to stumble. Azimio reached out and grabbed her before she could trip.

Well, look at that, Dave and Santana could make matching smirks.

"We're geniuses." Dave nodded and they low-fived so Azimio and Mercedes wouldn't see them.

"Who the hell are you and what did you do with ugly Adams?" Mercedes threw an insult out there. Azimio snorted.

"I could say the same for you, but the bitchy Jones is still here." Dave and Santana stiffened, prepared to jump to intervene if they got into a fight. But instead, Mercedes just smirked.

"You're damn straight. She's here, and here to stay." She hooked her arm through Azimio's and tugged him along. "Now, who's hungry?"

"I like a girl who can eat." Azimio grinned.

"Well, that's good, cause if you wanna stick with me you need to like that."

R & R.