Not The Plan

I hope you guys are still enjoying the story, because you are in for the long haul with this one ;P

Alright, some of you might argue that this is chapter is OOC, but this is my interpretation and I believe it is very much in character depending on the observer's vision of the character. Everything will be further explained next chapter.

-Btw slight trigger warning I guess, if you read between the lines a bit, there are traces of depression and slight suicidal thoughts, so do not read if you are very sensitive to these topics!

Onto the story then ;)

I do not own any of the characters or the TV show, this is merely my interpretation on it. No copyright infringement intended.

-o0o-

Weeks had passed since Euron's execution and the men he had taken with him had slowly started accepting Yara as their Queen. After the initial hatred she had received from them, they quickly realised that she wasn't such a bad ruler after all, even if she was a woman. As Euron had come to Meereen with not nearly the number of ships he had set out to build, they still needed to build more in the former slave city to have enough to cross the Narrow Sea with Daenerys' army.

Which is what was being done. Ships were being built and preparations were being made for when they eventually left for Westeros. Who would rule the city, how the food would be distributed and on it went. Yara never really listened when it came to logistics. Her forte was the ships and perhaps fighting. Speaking of fighting that is also something she did often in recent weeks. Every morning at dawn she would walk to the training grounds where the blonde female she had come to adore would be waiting for her.

Every day passed like this, they never missed a morning. Even on extremely busy days, they still made time for these training sessions. For Yara had convinced the blonde that knowing how to fight was of great importance. That is also how she found herself training with the dragonborn girl this morning.

The Targaryen girl had improved tremendously throughout the weeks. From working with the staffs to hand-to-hand combat, however they had not started to use any actual weapons yet. And it seemed the blonde was getting more frustrated each training that she kept landing on her back even though she was holding her own in a sparring session for longer than in the beginning. But even if she was improving, Yara still beat her each time. In the beginning the younger girl would merely shrug it off and get up again, but as weeks passed the other girl got more and more irritated. Until this morning when her irritation reached a boiling point.

As Yara yet again pulled the other girl's feet out from under her with her staff, she saw the girl fall to the ground, but instead of getting up she lay still. The brunette immediately became worried and she asked whether the blonde was alright.

"Yes, fine." the Dragon Queen sneered at her. The smaller girl planted her elbows in the ground and leaned on them, not moving to get up.

Yara looked taken aback, not understanding exactly what had happened. I mean she had seen the irritation of the other girl, but still. "What is wrong?" the brunette asked.

"What is wrong?" Daenerys asked her incredulously, "You have been putting me on my back for these past few weeks and it seems as if I am not learning a thing. That is what is wrong."

It was said with so much self-loathing and contempt that Yara couldn't reply for a second, merely gaping at the other girl. "Of course you are getting better." the brunette eventually rebutted.

"I am not."

"You are." the brunette denied the other girl, "Now get up and pick up the staff."

"No. I am not getting better at this, so we are just wasting time training if it doesn't result in anything." the blonde said, still not making any move to get up.

Realising that approaching the girl in a comforting way was getting her nowhere, the warrior knew she needed to try another approach. So as Yara looked down at the other girl, she imagined all the ways in which the other girl could die in battle if she did not learn to fight. All the ways in which she could be assassinated if she didn't know how to protect herself. And slowly she felt herself get angry at the people who would try to hurt her. She felt herself get slightly angry also at the stubborn girl who didn't want to learn to fight. She channelled this anger and then focused all of it on the other girl.

"Get up, now." Yara spoke with so much authority that it would make men quake in their boots and immediately do her bidding. The blonde however did not seem to have the same reaction and merely looked at the warrior. The only indication that she had heard her being a raised eyebrow.

The brunette stormed over and without preamble gripped the chin of the other girl in her hand in such a fierce grasp that she knew it would hurt. She did not wish to hurt the other girl, but if it was what it took to make her continue then that is what she would do. Yara gripped her chin more firmly still and then looked into blue eyes, which looked slightly hurt now. Good, at least hurt was better than indifferent. She could not let the other girl be indifferent about her life and safety.

"You are going to get up and you are going to learn how to fight." Yara spoke so surely it was a statement that could not be questioned. Still as the dragonborn female seemed about to refute her statement she gripped her chin more tightly and spoke up again, "You are improving, you might not be able to beat me, but I have been fighting my entire life. That you are even able to hold your own in a fight at least for a little bit is improvement. You have only been training for weeks, Dany, you cannot expect results immediately."

The outburst had started harshly, but in the end as she had started to see tears form in the younger girl's eyes she had softened her voice and loosened the hold she had on her chin slightly. All of a sudden as Yara was looking into those hurt eyes they slowly started to harden and it was like a wall was going up. Before Yara heard the icily tone that was being used towards her, the tone she hoped would never be used for her: "Let go of me right now. I am the Queen, I am your Queen. Get off of me!"

It was said in a tone, that could be mistaken for indifference, but Yara knew better. She heard the hatred laced in it and even if she hated that Dany was using it on her, the warrior could use this.

"No." Yara simply said, daring her to do something and she did.

In the next second Yara felt a sharp stinging in her right cheek and because of the unexpectedness of the blow she fell with the movement of the blow. The brunette lay there stunned for a few seconds before looking up. She saw the blonde standing there. The way she stood over Yara she almost looked to be some sort of vengeful goddess. As she saw the girl charge at her Yara quickly dove out of the way and scrambled to her feet. Quickly regaining her footing and balance, before getting into a fighting stance. The two traded blows, but all of them were blocked. An example yet again that the blonde was improving in her fighting, but apparently she didn't wish to see this.

They went at this sparring match, both with matching anger and flaring tempers. Directed not at each other, but at things that were beyond their control. People they lost that they couldn't save. People that had hurt them. People that had used them. But still they kept fighting. At least Yara did, the blonde seemed to wish to give up on her life. Why was a mystery to the warrior.

"My entire life men have looked down on me! Beaten me, used me!" the blonde screamed at her in frustration.

"Then let it out!" Yara screamed right back at her, before throwing a punch that the blonde blocked.

"I cannot." Daenerys merely replied before turning away from the warrior, starting to walk out of the training ring.

Oh hell no, this fight isn't over. The brunette charged and took the blonde down, landing on top of her in the dirt. Yara turned her around so she could look the blonde in the eye. Using her hands Yara managed to capture the dragonborn's wrists and held them next to her head while pinning her to the ground with her hips. "Our fight isn't over." Yara remarked.

Daenerys who seemed to be a mix between agitation and hurt at the moment merely glared at Yara who was pinning her down.

"We don't give up." the brunette replied fiercely, "Warriors don't give up."

"I am not a warrior." Dany replied seeming to deflate under the Ironborn's grip.

"We are all warriors, all of us. We are all warriors and life is our fight." the older girl replied, gazing intently into blue eyes that seemed closed-off to try and make her message resonate in the younger girl's head.

"Well what if I don't want to fight anymore? What if I am tired of fighting?" Dany asked her, so much desperation in her voice, "I mean what is worth fighting for if all that we care for dies anyway? If all that we hold dear gets destroyed?"

"We fight so that in the end we live together with our loved ones for as long as possible. We try to stave off the inevitable for as long as possible. We find something to fight for!" the Greyjoy replied, hopelessly trying to get through to the blonde.

Yara had not known how deeply this girl had mentally been scarred, she should have known really. She had heard hints as to how the girl grew up. Add to that the fact that almost her entire family got killed and the only member of her family that remained alive had abused her. Or that the girl had had no parental guidance or parental figure at all in her entire life. Of course a girl like that did not see the world to be a pleasant place or even a place worth fighting for.

"Learn to fight then to get the throne that you always wanted." Yara tried a different approach yet again.

She saw the blonde shake her head and didn't understand what she was saying. The brunette heard her mumble something, but could not quite make it out.

"What are you saying?" Yara asked.

"I don't want it!" Daenerys screamed at her, the wall finally seeming to crack, leaving behind a broken girl in the dirt in that too-warm city.

"What?" the warrior was completely taken aback, not understanding at all.

"I…I just… I never wanted it, I just felt that it was my duty." the blonde replied hesitantly, this seemed to be something she had never admitted to anybody else.

Yara was about to interject, but the younger girl continued on, "I wish to take back that throne to avenge my family. To make sure that those that were fighting for my family in the end did not die in vain. I want that throne so that I can help the poor and mistreated like I did in Slaver's bay." the blonde said, naming all the reasons for wanting the throne. Yara did not know whether the blonde was telling Yara this to let her know why she needed to do this or trying to convince herself that this is what she needed to do. Dany let a slight pause fall to take a deep breath before she continued, "I wish to help them, because no one helped me."

Sad and misunderstood blue eyes bore into her grey ones and Yara seemed to almost get swallowed by them. It was like the deep dark water of the sea that was ready to drag her down. But after having heard the girl confess her darkest secret, the pieces of Daenerys Stormborn finally seemed to click. Why the girl acted the way she did and why she wanted what she did. Yara released the girl's wrists, but the other girl didn't move, merely kept staring. Having mulled over what had been said, the brunette finally replied.

"If you do not wish for the throne, no one will fault you for not taking it back."

"You are wrong. I will blame myself and I cannot bear the thought of failing all of those people. Those that already died for my family or those that I could have helped." Daenerys replied.

"Okay." Yara conceded, letting out a sigh, knowing that she would probably never fully understand the silver-haired girl. "But if you so vehemently swear to take back that throne, then you have to keep fighting."

"Why?" the blonde asked her, but the Greyjoy knew that the other girl knew the answer. Dany merely wished for her to say it, so Yara did.

"Because giving up results in death. Because weakness equals death in this world. So we cannot afford to be weak. You and I, we cannot be weak. Not for our people and not for ourselves. Because the enemy will pounce on our weaknesses and kill us. So every time we get smacked down, we get back up again. Do you understand?"

Yara got a nod in return, but she could see that the blonde was still contemplating the warrior's words. They were wise, but harsh lessons, that had been taught to the brunette as well. Many years ago at that. So because the younger girl was still deep in thought Yara got off of her and stood up. She looked down and saw that Daenerys wasn't getting up yet. Holding out her hand towards the other girl she waited for her to take it, which Dany did in the end.

Knowing she still needed to add something, Yara spoke, hoping that Daenerys was listening, "If that damn throne isn't worth fighting for then don't fight for it. Look for something in your life and fight for it. Because if you do not fight for your own life, then how can you expect others to fight for you."

Yara knew it might sound harsh, but it needed to be said. The warrior knew there was nothing more she could do here so she picked up the discarded staffs and went to put them away. She didn't look back towards the blonde, not once. And when Yara had put the staffs away and turned back to the training grounds, they had been totally vacated. Please don't give up, Dany, I would fight all of your fights for you, but this is not one I can fight. Yara let this thought filter through her mind, before tucking it away. The brunette let out a sigh and left to walk back to the Pyramid to freshen up and continue her day. However the Ironborn warrior knew that thoughts about the blonde would be running through her head all day.

-o0o-

I listened to some heavy and awesome music, while writing this, so it explains the angst, oops…

This is totally my interpretation on why Daenerys wants that throne so vehemently, because I do not see her as some power-hungry noble with a well-known last name. I see her as a girl who never had any family or support, who never truly had a home, who has lost the things she loved such as her first husband and child, who was hurt again and again by her brother, who has been the target of many assassinations, etc. etc. I could go on and on, but the point is that the girl is utterly damaged. That a girl like that doesn't see a lot of things in this awful world that are worth fighting for, makes sense to me. And that a throne is not something she desires for the power, but firstly for the duty, then also to avenge, but also to help in the end.

That is my interpretation of her character at least. It might be totally OOC and you might not agree, but review or PM me and we can have that discussion hihi

Well this got long quickly, I am just very passionate about this subject. ;p

Follow, favourite and review! ;)

Xoxo

Vera