Lily briskly walks to her room, ignoring everyone around her. Snape's voice echoes in her head, over and over she hears him call her those things. Filthy. Mudblood. Petunia's voice joins his. Echoing in her head. Freak. Filthy. Mudblood. Freak. Lily throws her bag down on the ground and throws herself on her bed, tears stinging her eyes. How could it all have gone south so quickly? How could Severus' feelings switch so fast? It made no sense to her. Why would he call her that? Him of all people knew how bad that word hurts her.

Tears slide down her cheeks as Lily sits alone on her bed, not wanting anyone to walk in. She prayed that her roommates were busy elsewhere. Sobs rack through her body, making it hard for her to breath. A lump forms in her throat so she isn't able to swallow. Lily let's all of her dark thoughts come to the forefront of her mind and consume her. Why would anyone say these things to someone? Don't they realize how damaging it is?

Lily cries to herself, hopelessness washing over her in waves. Everyone knew that she was a sham. Everyone knew she didn't deserve to go to Hogwarts. That she wasn't really a witch. Not really. Not according to books done by famous wizards. Not according to Voldemort. Not according to her best friend. That's what being a mudblood meant. That you were fake. That you were dirty.

Lily's sobs slowly die down, leaving her feeling more alone than ever. Her breathing eventually evens out and she manages to stop crying. She stands up, her knees weak and her body feeling drained. She finds her way to the bathroom and stands in the mirror, looking at her reflection. Her eyes were puffy and red, her cheeks as dark as her hair, and her skin was over all blotchy. Waving her wand, she uses a beauty spell to get rid of the puffy eyes and redness. She pulls her hair up into a messy bun and takes a deep breath.

"Y-you are Lily J. Evans. You can d-do this. Sc-screw what they say." Lily tries to tell herself, her voice breaking and the lump forming in her throat again. She shakes her head and puts her wand in her pocket, focusing on the task again. You can be upset during the summer but not right now. Right now you have a job to do. Lily reminds herself. She grabs her bag and goes to the Common Room. It was time to cram before her practical exam. No way was she going to let this affect her grades. They could take a lot from her but no way was she going to let them take that.

The rest of the testing period passes in a blur and before Lily knows it it is the last day of school. Snape had come to say that he was sorry and ask for her forgiveness but Lily wasn't going to have it. He had call her a mud-blood. She would have prefered he just punched her in her gut. Lily had said something that she wasn't going to forgive him and put her disapproval of his friends out in the open and left him there in front of the Fat Lady's portrait.

Lily puts her final shirt in her trunk and shuts it, looking around her room one last time. Next year she could be a prefect and she would be one step closer to becoming a full fledged member of the magical community. She was one step closer to her dream. Mary smiles and bounces over to her red headed friend.

"Promise me you'll write this year. You never do." Mary begs, taking her friend's hands in her own. Lily smiles at her friend and nods, allowing her to pull her into a hug. "I'm going to miss you but next year you'll be a prefect."

"You don't know that for sure." Lily argues, blushing sheepishly. Mary and Rebecca both roll their eyes, knowing that their friend was a shoe in to become the Gryffindor female prefect.

"Oh please! You're a show in! Slughorn loves you, McGonagall loves you, Dumbledore adores you, and you're the top of our class. You'll get it for sure, no doubt about it." Rebecca chimes in, walking over to her friends. "Both of you have to write to me this summer. I'm being forced to go with my parents to the States."

"You'll be okay. Don't worry. I've heard the States can actually be quite fun. Bring me a picture of New York City will you? I've heard it's beautiful." Mary assures her friend, grabbing her trunk. "Now come on. It's time for the end of year feast."

"You two go on ahead, I'll catch up in a few minutes." Lily urges her friends, gathering up a few odds and ends. Lately, she did not have the energy to do much. She felt like losing Severus had also caused her to lose some of her energy. Normally it only took her a day to pack her things but this year it had taken her much longer. The year had been a struggle for her between Nott's bullying and harassment, her issues with Severus, finding out that Remus was a werewolf, and the general work of school. She was exhausted, emotionally and physically.

Lily shuts her trunk and latches it closed, yanking it off of her bed. She sets it down on the ground with a heavy sigh and looked around. The room seemed to bare without Mary's posters of boy bands from the muggle world and Rebecca's quidditch poster of the Holyhead Harpies. Instead you could see the beat up wood walls and the scratches left by past students of Hogwarts that had stayed in that very room. Lily walks out and into the common room, just watching her fellow Gryffindors go about their business. A few of the students seemed upset at leaving, particularly the younger students who had never had to leave before. Lily wanders out and let's her feet guide her through the castle, not really thinking about where she was headed because she didn't have a particular place that she wanted to end up.

She wanders the halls, not feeling lost but not feeling whole or at home. She was lost but not in the castle, in her own thoughts. Looking back on her year, Lily couldn't help but wonder what next year would hold for her. She honestly hoped that it would not be as eventful as this one.

While Lily is happy that this year is over, she can't help but dread going home to her family. Her parents would want to hear all about Hogwarts and would listen intently as she talked about it while her older sister would despise her even more. It was an impossible task for Lily. Her parents would not stop until she caved in and told them every single detail, which would include lying to them because if Petunia found out that her and Severus are no longer friends then she would never shut up about how she was right. Once again she was trapped between two worlds. When would it end?