Warning: This is where the M rating comes into play…

Chapter 14 – Soothing Doubts

A hard body moved above her, hands caressed her skin. She moaned when a tongue invaded her mouth and a hand cupped her breast. Nicole was experiencing complete bliss, she felt utterly complete with this man looming above her. She needed to see his face, to know who this was. She leaned back and found passionate amber eyes gazing back, searing her soul. Nicole reached up, one hand touching the perfect side, the other soothing the ruined side. He closed his eyes with a sigh, leaning into her touch. She ran her hands down his shoulders.

He fixed her gaze with a stare, "You are not revolted?"

Nicole smiled up at him. "Of course not, you are amazing."

Pleasure warmed his eyes and he leaned down for another kiss…

Nicole jolted awake, her heart pounding and her breaths coming in sharp gasps. She looked around wildly and then calmed when she realized she was in her room. She lay back down and ran her hands over her face.

A few days had passed since Erik had exposed his entire face to her. She hadn't seen him since. Nicole wondered if she had done something wrong. But that didn't feel right. Before Erik had left it felt as if they had reached a new step. As if they were moving forward. She still had doubts however. Why hadn't he come to see her today?

Nicole glanced over to the large mirror with suspicion. Something kept coming back to her. Before Erik had removed his mask, the look in his eyes when he had turned on Carlotta. It hadn't been Erik then, the Phantom had been there, staring out at her. The Phantom who killed, sought revenge, ambition. It was the Phantom who all but claimed her as his own when he snarled at Carlotta that she wasn't to go near her without his permission. That was what confused her the most. His actions were contradictory. He wanted to be with her, but he wasn't here now. Why? Where was he now?

Twisting and turning, Nicole couldn't find a comfortable enough position. She couldn't go back to sleep. Where is he?

It was a spur of the moment decision, she liked it. Nicole leaped out of bed and threw on a robe. She went to the mirror and began searching along its edges for a catch. She finally found it along the right side and swung the door wide. She took a torch to light her way and found a rat scuttling along the passageway.

Well, it worked once, Nicole thought and followed it.

Eventually she was led to a place she recognized and left the rat to its own path. She continued on for a few more turns until she found the gate. Since it was open she made her way inside. A few candelabras were lit, enough to see her way through the room. Nicole found herself to be slightly disappointed, thinking – rather naively, perhaps – that Erik would be up this late working on one thing or another.

Suddenly feeling like this wasn't such a good idea after all, Nicole turned to leave when she heard a cry of distress. Nicole raced up the steps and went into a room she had never been: Erik's.

She leaned over his bed and, using the light from the torch, saw Erik's unmasked face screwed up in pain.

It's a nightmare.

Nicole found a holder for her torch and went to Erik's side.

"Erik, wake up."

XXX

He and Christine were sitting at the organ. Christine was leaning her head on his shoulder.

"She fears you, you know?" Christine murmured.

Erik immediately thought of Nicole. Her calm, smiling face appeared before him. The last image he had of her when he had left her room through the mirror.

"No, she doesn't."

"How do you know?"

Erik's mind started to fill with doubts, but he pushed them away, keeping the last image of Nicole and their agreement to search for new replacements at the forefront. "She didn't run from me. In fact, she actually approached me and touched my face. She does not fear me."

Christine looked up at him with narrowed eyes. "She's a brilliant actor. She only acted the way she did so as to not incite your formidable anger. After all, she knows all of your previous exploits. In fact, she was even there for your latest one…"

Erik flashed back to M. Firmin and how he had murdered the hated ex-manager. "That was in her defense. She was grateful."

"She was afraid." Christine crooned. "She had just seen the proof of your villainy right before her eyes."

A claw gripped his heart. Uncertainty began to strike. Had Nicole really been acting? Erik thought. What if she was just biding her time; waiting to betray him?

As the horrible thoughts continued, Christine added to them. "The way you went after Carlotta last night has convinced her that your anger can also be applied to women and won't stop at the fair sex. She has now seen your true face and is secretly horrified."

Erik couldn't help listening to Christine, she was so persuasive.

"Nicole isn't like me. She hides and plots and schemes. With me, at least, you knew where I stood. You could trust my reactions mirrored my heart. But with Nicole…"

As Erik looked into Christine's eyes, he found a malicious glint, "With Nicole, you never saw her betrayal coming."

The Phantom shoved Christine away who fell off the bench with a shriek. She shot to her feet and stared him down, despite the fact that he towered over her petite form.

"You're right about one thing. Nicole is not like you."

Erik suddenly felt hands soothing the burning skin on the effected side of his face.

"Erik, wake up."

XXX

A vice-grip clamped on Nicole's arm. She winced but smiled when Erik's eyes met hers.

"Nicole?" His soothing baritone was thick with sleep. "What are you doing here?"

He rose from the bed and their faces were level. His grip on her arm softened, but hadn't left. They were so close, almost sharing the same breathing space. Erik's eyes were questioning and guarded.

"I'm sorry…"

Suddenly, sitting there on the edge of Erik's magnificent swan bed with him staring at her as candlelight played upon his perfect and tragic features, she felt that her reason for coming to see him was completely feeble…maybe even childish.

As Nicole attempted to concoct a feasible excuse, she looked around the room seeing books, scrolls of sheet music, and other broken trinkets – But she wasn't even seeing them. Her face was forced back to Erik when he applied his other hand to her chin. The one on her arm refused to leave, as if lifting it would be the unspoken signal for her to leave. Her face was turned toward him, but her eyes still resisted and instead moved down.

A gorgeous, well-muscled chest met Nicole's gaze.

"Nicole…" The tone Erik used was laced with mild amusement.

If possible, Nicole's face grew hotter. Between the two, Nicole still felt his chest was the lesser of two evils. She spoke to it instead of his face. "I thought you might be mad at me. You didn't come to see me lately and I thought, maybe you had decided to ignore me." Out loud, Nicole now knew that these weren't logical assumptions. In the past, Erik would be absent from sight for a week or more. But as he began to trust her, the length of time between absences shortened until rarely a day passed without being in one another's company. Maybe she had just jumped to conclusions.

The hand from her chin dropped. Nicole glanced up to find that Erik's eyes had shifted over to another point in the room. He was considering something. When he looked back at her, he was still considering.

"I suppose I was recovering from shock." Not quite what she was expecting, Nicole waited for him to continue, "I have never willingly shown my entire face to anyone. Not even Mme. Giry who merely stumbled upon my deformity. Even Christine – " Here he paused, a brief look of pain, then it was gone, "Her curiosity had ruled her actions and she discovered my secret."

From his hardened features, Nicole concluded that Christine hadn't taken his secret well. Without conscious thought, Nicole's hand drifted up to Erik's deformity and caressed the ruined skin. His amber eyes flashed in shock and he jerked away. "I'm sorry." Nicole's offending hand dropped back into her lap.

Erik resisted the urge to brush own hand over his tingling face. "No." He met her eyes. "You are welcome to do it again."

Nicole looked as surprised as Erik felt at those unbidden words. She accepted the offer and rubbed her palm across his molten skin. The pace of her heart increased as Erik's face leaned into the touch.

Erik opened his eyes and saw the increased intensity in Nicole's. Never before had he felt this way about another person. Not even Christine. Erik had idolized Christine, worshiped her from afar, believing her kind heart and pure soul could accept him entirely. He had placed too many expectations on her. What he had thought was love was merely idolatry, obsession…What he had with Nicole was truly more powerful, all-encompassing.

Erik leaned in and brushed his lips across Nicole's. Nicole was pleasantly surprised and pressed back, seeking a continuance. Erik obligingly deepened the kiss. When they broke apart for breath, Nicole ran her hands down his bare chest in soothing circles and kissed along his perfect jawline. Erik bent to her neck and sucked on the tender flesh there.

Her moan encouraged him to continue, but he moved away from her anyway.

She was confused, "What's wrong?"

"We shouldn't go any further tonight."

"Why?"

How those words set his heart thumping. "Because…because this shouldn't be rushed." His nether regions disagreed.

Nicole tilted her head. "You want to get used to the idea?"

Erik's lips quirked upward in a smile, "Exactly."

Nicole's smile matched his own. "Promise to visit me tomorrow?"

Erik nodded. "I'll bring the list of perspective replacements to your office tomorrow morning."

For a moment Nicole had to think about that. "Right – the replacement for Carlotta."

They met for one more brief kiss and then Nicole left to get some much needed sleep.