Chapter 14

The days turn into weeks, and slowly but surely things start to fall back into place.

I start up at school again, having mostly caught up on my make-up work and tests. I walk the halls with as much confidence as I can, still uneasy knowing everyone knows what I did and where I've been for the past few weeks.

While most people smile at me and say "Hi", which is something they never did before, there are still a select few that give me dirty looks. I've accepted it though; these people don't need to be in my life anyways.

True to her word, Johanna must have really laid Clove out, because when I see her, I can tell her nose is slightly crooked and the skin around her eye still looks a little dark. We make eye contact, and she gives me a look mixed with hatred and fear, but she doesn't say anything. I avoid her as much as I can, but to be honest, I think she's the one trying to avoid me.

While things are going better at school, my home life still leaves a lot to be desired. My father and I are still on very shaky ground, having shared no more than ten words since the night of his little speech. I've felt my anger towards him start to wane over the past few weeks, but I think my stubbornness is stopping me from forgiving him. Half of me hopes that one day I will be able to have a relationship with him again, and the other half just wants him to know that I'm still resentful.

This is a main topic I bring with me in my daily sessions with Cinna, and he does his best to switch my train of thinking towards my father, but I don't feel like it's working. When he asks about my friends, I tell him they are all treating me the same as before my attempt, and they have been a great support.

"That's very good," he says while smiling. "And what about Peeta? Did anything ever come of that?"

I smile at the mention of Peeta, and nod. "Yes, actually. He came to visit me the day before I got out of the hospital and we talked all afternoon. He's become a good friend of mine. He even asked me out on a date, another thing my father and I disagreed on."

"Oh really, what happened?"

"Well, I told my family that Peeta had asked me out, and my father rhetorically asked me if I thought that was a good idea, and then proceeded to compare Peeta to Cato."

Cinna takes this in and asks me, "Do you think you're ready to start dating again?"

I look at him, a little stunned at his bluntness. "I don't know. Maybe? I mean, dating and going on one date are two completely different things. Peeta is so nice, and if anything this is more like two friends hanging out having fun. I don't think he is expecting anything serious, we just want to get to know each other better."

Cinna nods and accepts my answer. "Well, it is up to you when you think you are ready to start another relationship. Just know that Peeta or anyone else should not pressure you into it. This has to happen on your own time, or it could end very badly. You understand that, right?"

I nod, a little defeated. Why doesn't anyone have faith in me that I know what I'm doing?

We end the session for the day and my mother drives me back home. It's Friday night, and I invited the girls to come over and watch movies, but Johanna is the only one who could make it. A few hours later, Jo and I are sitting on my bed, halfway through a terrible romantic comedy and a half-eaten pizza between us. Jo is on my computer, scrolling through a mindless celebrity gossip site when I hear the New Message tone from my Facebook go off.

"Ooooo, someone has a new message. Let's read who it's from…" She teases.

"Give me my computer, Jo." I say, reaching for the device. She pulls it away and clicks to the Facebook tab.

"Just as I suspected, it's the golden-haired baker."

"Jo, give it to me!" I say louder, trying to lean over her to grab the computer.

She begins to read dramatically, "Hey Katniss! Sorry to get back to you so late, I've been a little busy. I was wondering if you wanted to do something tomorrow night? Maybe get some pizza or go see a movie or something…"

I finally overpower her and snatch the computer away, my anger over the situation causing Jo to fall into a fit of laughter. I give her a dirty look and re-read the message for myself. "Oh, come on Kat! He so wants you. The boy is like sex on a stick and obviously wants to skewer you."

"You are vile." I spit back at her. "And wrong. He doesn't want that, he's just finally asking me out on the date I told him I would go on a few weeks ago. Not everyone has a dirty mind like you, Johanna."

"They do when they're an eighteen year old boy." She retorts back. I roll my eyes at her and try to think of something to type back to Peeta.

Johanna speaks again, but this time the teasing is absent from her voice. "Kat, I know Peeta is a good person, but promise me you'll be careful. Don't just jump into another relationship again. Give yourself time to heal, please."

"God, why does everyone think that one date with Peeta means I'm devoting the rest of my life to him? It's one date that is more to get to know each other then anything."

"I know, just promise me you'll be careful."

I look at her and see the sadness in her eyes. She probably thinks that if this goes bad, I will relapse and slip into another depression, or worse. I want to tell her that I'm fine, but the truth is I'm afraid of that happening too. But for some reason I have faith that I will gain a good friend in Peeta from this, and that chance trumps my fear at the moment.

"I promise." I say with a small smile. She smiles back, and the playfulness returns to her voice.

"So, what are you going to say back? Send him an ambiguous sext, something that says you want a boyfriend, but don't need a boyfriend, like

'Yes, I would love to spend time with you. I want to see if all those years of kneading bread paid off…' It's not too forward, but gives him an idea what a little sex kitten you can be… "

"Oh, God…"

After forcing Johanna to be quiet so I could think of something to say, Peeta and I decide to go to dinner at this little Italian restaurant in town that is known for their pizza. I offered to meet him there, but was relieved when he insisted on picking me up, because I don't have a car. I'm more nervous than I want to admit about this date, but am looking forward to it at the same time.

I fear that, because Peeta knows what happened and what I did to myself, it will be awkward and we won't have anything to talk about. I tell my mom this, and she does her best to calm me down.

"Honey, I'm sure you will find something to talk about. When in doubt, ask him about himself. Boys love to talk about themselves." She says with a smile.

When I told her about my date tonight, I could see she had the same worries Cinna and Johanna did. But in the end she was surprisingly lenient, and made me promise to text her every now and then to tell her where I was and what we were doing. I rolled my eyes at this, but I can understand where she is coming from. I know she told my dad about my date, but he hasn't said anything to me. Yet.

I'm standing in front of my closet, freshly showered with my hair back in a braid and a robe around my body. The restaurant is pretty casual, so I go with some black jeans and a soft purple top. I slip some sandals on and sit at my vanity to start my makeup. I never really wear a lot of makeup, mostly on special occasions, but I figure I should probably make more of an effort tonight.

I'm just putting on my foundation when Prim walks into my room, startling me a little bit.

"Whatcha doin?" she asks innocently.

"Just putting on my makeup." I say back.

"For Peeeeeeta?" she drags on, giving me a teasing look. I give her a dirty look.

"No, not for him. I'm doing this to look nice for myself. Is that so bad?"

"Uh-hu." She says, grinning. I continue my makeup, but Prim eventually takes over, and if I'm being honest, she does a better job on my makeup than I usually do.

"The key to makeup is to make it look like you're not wearing any." She says professionally.

"Jeeze, since when did you become a makeup artist?"

"Since ten minutes ago." I laugh at her, and start putting my makeup away when I hear the doorbell ring. I look at the clock and see that it is 5:58, so it must be Peeta because he said he would pick me up at 6:00. Prim gives me a teasing smile and I walk down the hall to answer the door.

When I open it, Peeta is standing on the other side, and my heart skips a little. He looks so good, (dare I say hot) wearing a pair of dark jeans that cling nicely to him and a dark blue shirt that makes his eyes look even impossible bluer. He's also wearing a casual black jacket, and it looks like he got a hair cut because now his hair is fairly short, when it used to hang a little in his eyes.

He smiles softly at me, his eyes quickly scanning my body, taking in what I'm wearing.

"Hi, Katniss." He says brightly.

"Hey Peeta. Would you like to come in? I just need to grab my purse and a few other things."

"Sure, take your time." I hold the door open as he walks in, and I leave him standing in the living room as I go to my room to grab my purse and try to calm myself down.

Holy fuck, he's here. He's actually here, and he looks so fucking good.

I'm breathing heavily as I chastise myself for thinking these things.

Get your mind out of the gutter. There's no way he wants you like that. No one does. He just wants to be friends, that's it.

I can feel my chest tightening, and I beg my body to get it together. The last thing I need is to have a panic attack right now.I take a few minutes to compose myself, and grab my purse off the desk. I check to make sure I have money and my cell phone, and start to walk back to the living room.

I'm about to round the corner when I hear a deep voice I know all too well speaking firmly in a hushed tone, and I must be catching the end of the conversation.

"I'm trusting her with you, but if she gets hurt again, I won't hesitate to do what I need to do to protect her. She's been through enough, and I won't see her suffer any more."

I am appalled my dad is threatening Peeta like this right before our date. He has absolutely no right to be this way; Peeta hasn't done anything wrong. I am fuming as I round the corner, trying to save Peeta the trouble of having to respond to this bully. I plaster a fake smile on my face and ask Peeta, "Ready to go?"

He nods, and I can see the terror of my dad's threat instilled on his face.

"It was nice to meet you, Mr. Everdeen." Peeta says politely.

"You too, Peeta." My dad responds in a cold, warning tone. Peeta audibly gulps as we walk out of the house, and I refuse to even look at my dad.

We walk to his truck and he opens the door for me. I thank him and slide in as he closes it and makes his way to the driver's seat. When he sits down I can tell his conversation with my dad really rattled him up, as he appears very nervous and shaky.

I try to ease his mind by saying, "I'm sorry about whatever my dad said to you. He and I are still not getting along and he had no right to do that."

"No, no, it's fine. Really." Peeta says quickly. "I understand where he's coming from. Dads should have the privilege of trying to scare off the new date. I know if I had a daughter, I would do the same thing." He says through a laugh, but I can tell he's still a little shaken.

I smile and say again, "Well, I'm sorry anyways."

"Don't be." He grins.

He puts the car in reverse and backs out of the driveway. We start to head down the road, when Peeta speaks up again. "By the way, you look really nice tonight."

I can see the sincerity in his eyes when he says this, although I'm not used to taking compliments, so I give him an awkward thank you and reply, "You look nice too."

He smiles, but I can see his pale cheeks turn a shade of rosy pink. It gives me a sense of relief that as nervous as I feel, it seems like Peeta feels it worse.

The drive to the restaurant is mostly silent as I try to create a list in my head of things to talk about with him. I can't think of anything but the past few months I've known him, and I am all of the sudden dreading this date.

When we get to the restaurant, Peeta parks and hops out of the car, opening my door for me chivalrously. I normally think these types of things guys are expected to do for girls are stupid, but it seems so second nature to Peeta that I just let it go. I wonder how many girls he's done that for.

Whoa, where the fuck did that come from?

We walk into the restaurant and are seated immediately, and given a breadbasket and some water. We spend some time looking over the menu, and finally decide to split a pepperoni, mushroom and black olive pizza.

"Are you sure that's okay? We can get something else if you like?" I ask him.

"Oh no, that's perfect! I'm glad you suggested it, it sound great."

"Okay." I reply silently.

We sit there in silence until the waiter comes to take our order, and then we sit in silence some more. I wish I could just force myself to start a conversation, but the tightness in my chest is preventing me from doing so. I look down at my hands, wishing I never agreed to come on this date.

Finally, I hear Peeta clear his throat as he says, "Katniss, please, if you don't stop talking I might go crazy." I look up at his serious face, not being able to tell if he is joking.

His mouth betrays him and he smiles wide at me, laughing at me confusion. I start to laugh with him, and just like that the tension between us lessens dramatically.

"I'm sorry I'm no fun to be around." I apologize.

"Oh, please, don't be ridiculous. You're perfect." I can see his cheeks redden a little when he says this, and mine redden as well.

He sighs and says, "How about we play a game? Let's play 20 questions."

"Okay." I reply. "You first."

He thinks for a second and says "Favorite color?"

"Green. You?"

"Orange. But not a harsh shade, more soft. Like a sunset."

This makes me smile, and now it's my turn to ask him one.

"Okay, favorite movie? And please don't say The Notebook, because I know that's not true."

This makes him laugh and he thinks the question over for a little bit. "I would have to say my favorite movie is probably Indiana Jones."

"Wow, really?"

"Yeah, I love all those movies, but Raiders of the Lost Ark is the best. I wanted to be him so bad when I was little. I'm pretty sure I dressed up with a hat and a whip for, like, five years straight on Halloween."

"Those are great movies." I agree.

"What about you?"

"Mine is a tossup between Robin Hood and Dumb and Dumber." He looks a little suprised at my answer.

"Interesting. Both very different, but classics nonetheless. My brothers and I were obsessed with Dumb and Dumber. Still are."

For the next hour and a half we ask each other questions back and forth as we eat.

I learn that his favorite band is The Clash, his favorite subject in school besides Art was English, his favorite breakfast food is French toast with a cup of tea (no sugar), and he got into the habit of double-knotting his shoelaces after he tripped one time and careened into a cake he had been working on.

I learn that he likes to sleep with the windows open, and his oldest brother is already married with a baby on the way.

"Just call me Uncle Peeta." He says with an excited laugh.

Even though this night started out rough, it is honestly one of the best nights of my life. Talking to Peeta is so much fun, and he always knows the right things to say. I learn that we have a lot in common, and it's really nice to be able to talk to someone with the same interests.

Our pizza was delicious, and when I ask the waiter to split the check, Peeta refuses to let me pay for my half.

"It's my treat, I insist. I'm the one who dragged you out here, the least I can do is pay for a pizza." I sigh heavily and relent.

"Thank you. But you didn't drag me here, I was happy to come."

He smiles softly, and after he pays we leave the restaurant.

"So, where do you want to go now?" He asks me.

I think about it, and get in the car, telling him, "Come on, I know the perfect place to go."

When we get to the boardwalk, there is a gentle breeze coming in from the ocean, making the air feel crisp and clean. We walk along the wooden path, talking about this and that, just enjoying each other's company. It feels good to take a nice walk after a heavy dinner. Even though I've gotten better, my stomach is still sensitive and feels weird if I eat too much.

I've really liked being with Peeta tonight. I regret so much how I treated him when we were little, I feel like I missed out on a great friendship all throughout school because of how I acted. He is so nice and intelligent, but also really down to earth at the same time.

I can tell from the way he talks about working in the bakery and his art that he is also very talented at drawing and painting and sculpting things. He just makes me feel so at ease, and even though we hardly know each other, he makes it feel like we've been friends for years. His smile is so encapsulating, and it feels like he smiles at me a lot more than I deserve.

It's true: I don't deserve someone like Peeta. He deserves a nice, beautiful girl who will treat him the way he deserves to be treated and who will be as caring to him as he is to her. I am definitely not that girl: I'm a selfish bitch who probably shouldn't even be thinking about dating anyone ever again.

Not that anyone would ever want me.

No one wants to have to take care of a damaged person.

"So that was my favorite painting I ever did. Camping out on the beach with my brothers to watch the sunrise was spectacular, and I know the painting I did off my picture of it doesn't even come close to being as beautiful, but it was still a good memory."

"What did you do with the painting?" I ask.

"I entered it into a few art shows and used it as my final for my art class junior year. I wanted to give it to my parents, but my mom didn't want it because she said it didn't match the décor in any of the rooms. I was about to either throw it out or donate it when my brother told me he and his wife wanted it for their new house, so now it's I their living room."

I can hear the sadness in his voice when he talks about his mother. I know there is a story behind it, but I don't feel like it's my place to ask him what it is.

"Well good, I'm glad he has it. I hope I can see it some day."

"Yeah, I hope so too." He says softly.

When he looks up, the sincerity I see in his eyes makes my heart soar. It's true when they say there's still good guys out there, and Peeta is one of them.

So many men our age are taught that being an asshole and getting into drinking an doing drugs and being stupid is what's cool, or that's what will get you the most friends.

And then there's Peeta, who takes such pride in his work, and who's best memory is camping on the beach with his brothers to watch the sunset.

Peeta Mellark will grow up to have a wonderful life and fill it with people who are capable of as much love as he is. I know he will.

We walk along, still looking at each other with soft gazes, when all of the sudden Peeta trips and falls to the ground. He lets out a surprised cry and tries to brace himself with his hands. I look and see that the end of his pant leg got caught on one of the nails in the boardwalk.

But it's not the tear in his pants that catches my eye.

It's the metal I see peeking out from under the material, where his ankle used to be.

He doesn't see me looking, and when he tries to free himself, the pants ride up even more, revealing a silver rod-looking prosthetic leg in place of his real one. I stand there, frozen in shock.

I didn't know Peeta lost a leg? Why didn't he say anything about it? How did it happen?

I push my questions aside as I bend down to help him up, but it's too late. He's seen the look on my face and knows I saw something he obviously didn't want me to see.

"Are you okay?" I ask him.

He takes my outstretched hand and stands up as he nods. "Yeah, thanks."

I give him a small smile and we continue walking. The atmosphere around us has completely changed from the beginning of the evening, and what was once an easy, conversation-filled night is now full of silent tension. I want to ask him about his leg, but I don't want to be nosy or rude, because it might be a sore subject.

But my curiosity is getting the better of me.

If I ask him, what's the worse that could happen?

I don't think he would get mad at me, if anything he'll just tell me he doesn't want to talk about it.

I make up my mind, and in a small, unthreatening voice I ask, "How did it happen?"

He looks at me with a piercing gaze, but it doesn't look like he's mad, more hesitant and embarrassed. He doesn't respond for a minute, and I take that as a silent refusal to answer, when he finally speaks in a soft, child-like voice.

"It happened when I was twelve." He begins.

"My brothers and I had hiked down to a new creek to try by our house. We loved going out to explore the creeks and rivers around the area, so that weekend had been no different than any other. This one had deep water and jumping rocks, which we loved. We spent all day there, jumping and swimming in the creek. We had walked up to one of the higher rocks, and my brothers dared me to jump off it first."

"It looked to be pretty deep water, and I wanted to show them I wasn't the baby they though I was. I jumped off, and when I landed, both my legs buckled and cracked. It turned out the water was actually only about two feet deep; it just looked much deeper from up above. When I landed, me left leg got wedged between two rocks underwater, and my right leg landed with most my weight on it. It was the most intense pain I've ever felt in my life, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, but I couldn't get out because I couldn't move my legs to swim."

"There was blood everywhere and my brothers freaked out and had to carry me all the way back home. I blacked out from the pain as soon as we reached the house, and the next thing I knew, I woke up in the hospital without my left leg and the other one in a cast. I had broken both my legs in multiple spots, but they couldn't save my left one because it was beyond repair and the bone had cut through one of my major arteries. I had to be in a wheelchair for about seven months, and then on crutches for another four before my mom finally relented and gave me the money to get a prosthetic."

"She said I didn't need one, and that I was just fine with my crutches. But being in school this whole time, I was teased about not having both my legs and being the handicapped kid, so I got really depressed. I couldn't snap out of it, and at my mother's refusal my dad finally stood up to her and got me to see a psychologist. His suggestion for the prosthesis finally convinced her to get me a fake leg because he said it might help my depression and give me more confidence, but she wasn't happy about it. And throughout the years it's been harder and harder to convince her to pay for an upgrade, because I keep growing out of them. And it's the cheapest on e on the market. My dad wants to help, but my mom controls the all the finances in our family. Hopefully soon I'll have saved enough money working in the bakery to pay for it myself, because this one is really starting to hurt more and more every day."

When he finishes this story, I don't even notice the tears running down my face.

To think that someone as caring and beautiful as Peeta had to suffer such a traumatic event absolutely breaks my heart. And to think his mother would treat him like this makes me want to rip the woman's head off.

"Oh my god Peeta, I had no idea. I-I'm so sorry." I pull him into a strong hug, letting my tears stain his shirt.

He wraps his arms around me and says in my ear, "Don't be. I didn't tell you that so you would feel sorry for me."

I can sense the embarrassment in his voice, and when I pull back, his eyes won't meet mine.

"Peeta," I say as I lay my palm on his cheek, "You have nothing to be embarrassed about. What happened to you doesn't make you any less of the amazing person everyone knows you are. You're the most brave, selfless person I know, and what happened to you doesn't define who you are. No matter what anyone says."

He gives me a small smile, and cocks his head with a laugh.

"Funny, I could say the exact same thing for you."

And with that he starts walking back the way we came.

Hello everyone! I am sorry this update took me so long, I've been packing and moving things into my new apartment at school, so it's been a little cray cray the past few weeks. I start school this Thursday, so the updates may take a little longer, but I PROMISE I won't abandon this story! I have every intention of finishing it, and I hope you guys have every intention of reading it! :)

As always, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review! I love them!