Aftermath
Chihiro refused to come out of her room for three days. She hardly slept and only drank water from the taps in her bathroom. She did not eat; she could not face the thought of food at all. She began to hear the bathhouse coming back to life. Repair crews hummed through the night and voices echoed in the corridor during the day. It gave her little comfort that someone was taking care of the place. What did it matter to her now? Looking back, Chihiro knew what she must have experienced was something akin to shellshock. She had shared so much of herself with Haku that the edges of their consciousness had started to blur; where Chihiro ended and Haku started had been a fluid thing, they were in truth part of each other. Now he had been ripped from her, and her shocked mind needed the time alone to adjust.
Linca, Rin and Meeka all tried to get her to open the door. In gentle, sympathetic tones they called to her, telling her they would not force her to come out but she should eat. Chihiro would just ask them quietly to leave; eventually she gave up responding altogether, leaving them to worry. Yes, she was being ridiculously selfish and there was plenty of work she could have turned her hand to but she could not shake off the feeling of emptiness for long enough to want to leave the room.
On the third day, something changed. Chihiro was curled up in the windowsill watching the early summer grass of the plain dance, a sea of lush green tips blown before a warm breeze. Strange grazing animals like oxen browsed the grass and predators hunted their herds, taking the young the old and the weak. Chihiro felt her nail catch on something and she hissed as a splinter worked its way under the nail. She pulled out the sliver of painted wood and squeezed the digit to make sure there was no wood left in the puncture wound. She sucked away the blood, crushing the thought that someone would be getting a little crazy about now if he was here. She looked down to see what had hurt her.
Between her feet the paint had started to come loose and bubble as the summer air turned humid and damp seeped in. The paint was not old but it was damaged. Someone had scratched characters into it. Chihiro turned her head so she could see the scrawl.
"Chihiro Ogino's home is here," the sill declared proudly to the world. Chihiro gasped. Her hand fluttered to her mouth and her bottom lip trembled. She remembered writing those words, carving the characters into the wood with her now lost hair sticks, trying to leave part of herself behind in case she was not bonded to the spirit world.
That evening she had become the first human bonded to this world in centuries. That and a white dragon announced to the spirit world that he loved her. For her own obtuse reasons and because she had a romantic streak, the goddess of the spirit world had bent ancient laws and bonded her. The memories flooded her and for a moment Chihiro thought she would drown in them. With the memories came emotions; hope, fear, need, want, lust and above all love; love that had pulled together a human and a dragon and bound them so tightly they could not live properly without each other. Without Haku Chihiro would exist, but not live; life would lack colour and depth. Tears pricked Chihiro's eyes and she hiccupped forlornly.
Haku was far from the only thing she loved in this world; there were her sisters, her Granny, her friends and she loved the life she lived here. She loved the spirit world with all its cruelties and prejudices; it was not that different from the human world, it just had that extra layer of mystique that had drawn her to it.
"Chihiro Ogino's home is here," she whispered and she started to weep, grizzly heart-sore weeping.
"I want him back," she sobbed. "I want him here right now!" Chihiro had thought she had known everything it meant to be in love with someone. She did not know this love, this howling, hungry emptiness that demanded something from her but she was unsure what. Her soul felt like it was being shredded but somehow she was enduring it, somehow she was still breathing when she felt like she should be dead.
Something clattered, making her jump and she looked in the direction the sound came from. Haku's sword had fallen from the bed. Chihiro wiped at her eyes and frowned. She had put it in the middle of her bed; odd that it should have fallen to the floor. The black ball in the hilt of the sword glinted at her as if taunting her; Chihiro's frown deepened to a scowl. She got down off the windowsill and bent to pick it up. The sword jerked and slid across the floor away from her. Chihiro gasped and jumped back.
The sword lay still. Chihiro knew that the vile weapon was so packed full of her mate's magic that it was almost sentient. The first time she had touched it she could have sworn she felt its glee as it slowed and then stopped her heart. When she had used it to defend herself she almost thought she could feel the blade sing for joy be handled by someone it recognised, she definitely remembered the sensation darkening as it bit into the flesh of the shadow spirit. She eyed the beautiful weapon suspiciously.
"I must be insane," she thought. "I am about to talk to an inanimate object."
"I know you don't like me," she said, her voice still rasping from crying. "I am hardly fond of you either, but you are his sword and he made you so I suppose I respect that… And you saved my life; for what it is worth, I'm grateful." She approached the weapon and bent to pick it up.
"I can't leave you on the floor, you will get damaged," she murmured in a way she hoped might placate the bit of metal. She grasped it by the scabbard and lifted it up. The thing seemed heavier than ever and she had to use both hands to lift it. The blade vibrated in the scabbard and Chihiro clutched it to her, frightened she would drop it.
"Want… him… back," a low whispered voice echoed through her mind. Chihiro squeezed her eyes shut and did her best not to listen.
"Mate of my creator… avenge him," the insidious voice hissed.
"I can't," Chihiro whispered, tears beginning to leak from her eyes again. "I don't know where he is, or even who has him and I…"
"TOO WEAK!" the sword spat, interrupting her.
"Yes," Chihiro admitted.
"You will avenge him," the sword repeated.
"I told you I don't know how, I…" White hot pain suddenly shot up Chihiro's arms. She squealed and tried to drop the sword but it seemed fused to her fingers.
"You will avenge him!" the sword sang in her mind. "I will drink the blood of your enemies and we shall take back what is ours."
Chihiro screamed and finally dropped the weapon. She fell backwards and hugged her arms to herself. Her forearms burned as if scalded. Lip trembling, she sat up and looked at her right arm; running up her arm from wrist to elbow was what looked like a tattoo. It was a dark blue zigzag line that was indelibly etched into her flesh. The pattern was repeated on her other arm.
"They look like bolts of lightning," she whispered with confused wonder.
Just then the door that had kept the world at bay for so long shattered into a million splinters. A worried looking Linca hastened over the remains of the door and stepped into the room.
"I know you want to be alone but I heard you scream and…" She trailed off. Chihiro saw her take in the dropped sword and herself huddled in the corner, hugging her arms. She could see Linca put two and two together and arrive at nine point four. Linca's white eyes widened and she stormed across the room and grabbed Chihiro by the front of her shirt and dragged her to her feet.
Chihiro choked back her explanation in surprise as she watched Linca raise her delicate blue hand, cut and blistered from repair work, and deliver a stinging blow across Chihiro's left cheek.
"How dare you!" Linca hissed in a disgusted tone. "This was the answer you came up with after three days to think about it?" The spirit's body shook with rage; she closed her eyes and her hands clenched into fists. Suddenly she gave up trying to control her temper. Her eyes snapped open and they were completely black. All the pent up worry and struggle of the last few days was now released onto her sister.
"For all that is Holy!" she roared "I never met such an appallingly dense race of humans in my entire life as the one you come from! There is no such thing as an honourable death Chihiro and don't you forget it!"
"Wha-!" Chihiro squeaked.
"Of all the unfeeling and ungrateful things to do! Did you consider anyone else at all? Rin and I have been worried sick about you but you…" Linca's tirade was interrupted by a low throaty chuckle from her sister.
"I'm sorry, but I fail to see what you find so amusing about this, human!" the spirit ranted.
"I'm sorry, Linca…" said Chihiro still laughing. "I did not intend to kill myself."
"Then what were you doing?" snapped the sprite. Chihiro stopped laughing and simply looked at her sister. In that look Linca could see all Chihiro had been through in her solitude but most of all she saw her sadness; deep penetrating sadness.
"Chi," she breathed. Chihiro shook her head, not wanting to be consoled. She held out her arms to show Linca the marks. The spirit frowned at them, puzzled, but from the doorway there was a gasp of recognition.
"Da' tant." Rin whispered. The spirit woman's dark eyes were round and frightened.
"Huh?" said Chihiro and Linca together. Rin stepped gingerly into the room and with a trembling hand touched the marks on her sister's arms.
"Rin," Chihiro asked softly, "do you know what this is?"
"It…it's…" stammered Rin. Then she sighed and pulled at her rough work tunic. Chihiro and Linca glanced at each other, nonplussed, as Rin lifted her tunic to reveal a similar mark running up her taught stomach. The lighting bolt was interrupted by a flattish depression which Chihiro assumed was the non-bonded spirit's equivalent of a belly button.
"I have had this mark for as long as I can remember," said the spirit. "It is the mark of Da'tant."
"But what is it?" whispered Linca, touching Rin's mark.
"It is a warning to others, a warning that you are on a holy mission and that you will let nothing get in your way."
"What mission?" asked Chihiro.
"Normally the mark is bestowed on one seeking justice or more often, righteous revenge."
"Revenge?" echoed Chihiro weakly. Rin nodded and her hand fell to her stomach.
"I can't remember my mission, but I'm fairly sure it was something to do with why I came here. I will never seek my justice or get my revenge because I can't remember the crime against me. You, however, have two marks, meaning your mission is two fold."
"I have no idea what I am supposed to do," the human whispered. She held up one arm. "One of these is something to do with Haku and the sword is in a rage and ordering me to get him back." She held up the other arm. "But what is this for?" Rin shook her head.
"Maybe you have to kill the one responsible for all this," muttered Linca darkly.
"You are not helping," snapped Rin. Linca bristled at her tone.
"The universe is a cold, unfeeling place. How do you know that her vengeance does not involve murder?" Linca snorted.
"I'm not going to kill anyone," said Chihiro firmly. "But how on earth am I even going to attempt to get him back? I don't know where he is or how far away, or who has him. I'm only human; how can I be expected to do this without help?"
"Only human?" said Zeniba's voice from the doorway. "Now that is an oxymoron if I ever heard one." The old witch looked tired and there was a half healed cut across her forehead. Her blue frumpy dress had tears in it but it was clean and washed. She probably hand not had time to repair it. Zeniba smiled as Chihiro stared at her.
"No power to spare on making myself presentable I'm afraid," she chuckled. She shuffled into the room and Chihiro saw Zeniba was carrying the bag she had brought from the human world. The witch dropped the bag at the human's feet and it rattled with broken glass.
"It's not all shattered," said the witch happily. "And who says you will not have help to do this?" The witch took Chihiro's face in her papery hands and took a deep breath.
"Let's get a better look at you now those pesky hair sticks are gone. They really were troublesome my dear." Chihiro felt magic start to build in the room and tensed up.
"Don't fret," said the witch calmly. "I just want to see things more clearly. Just relax; I won't be more than a moment." Chihiro's tac'tal grew hot and the old purple band on her wrist glowed.
Suddenly what Chihiro had always assumed to be a large wart on the witch's face, low down on the centre of her forehead, snapped open to reveal a large violet eye behind it. Chihiro shuddered and her sisters gasped. Zeniba's wicked nails dug into Chihiro's skin a little.
"Be still," she hissed. "And let me look."
Chihiro could not help staring at that eye and soon she was aware of very little else; the eye looked through her and beyond, seeing what she never could; past, present and future all merged together in a great loop and her tiny place in it. The eye snapped shut and Zeniba let her go.
"It seems that the prophecy that I was witness to has at last come into play. As I suspected, your bonding here has set in motion things that were foreseen millennia ago," sighed the witch. "Your path is still uncertain, Chihiro, it is up to you how you proceed but you will come up against a number of obstacles that only you can surmount. Getting the dragon back is only half the challenge and to be honest the lesser part. Fulfilling the prophecy is your true goal."
"How can I fulfil a prophecy I know next to nothing about!" Chihiro cried. Zeniba shrugged.
"I wish I could tell you but I swore an oath of secrecy, one that I fear that my sister may have broken."
Chihiro had not felt so lost since learning of Haku's kidnap. She could almost feel fate starting to press down on her. The petty matter of a lost love was nothing in the great scheme of things. But if she was lucky she might be able to placate fate and gain her mate back, thus her arms bore two marks.
"Well!" said Linca brightly immediately lessening the tension in the room. "This is far too much to think about sober." She had been rummaging around Chihiro's bag and found an intact bottle of vodka. "I say we all have a drink and something to eat then think about the heavy stuff."
Chihiro smiled. Linca took a long pull from the bottle, gulping the liquid as if it was water. She handed the bottle Chihiro and Chihiro sighed gratefully; a drink was just what she needed to steady her nerves. She tipped the bottle to her lips but before she could drink Zeniba snatched it off her.
"Just tea for you I think, Chihiro." The look Chihiro gave the witch could have shattered stone.
"Why?" growled the human.
"Because you've starved yourself for three days; drinking on an empty stomach is never good for you, and also it might hurt the baby," came the kindly reply. It took Chihiro almost a full minute to grasp what Zeniba meant. Linca's mouth was hanging open and Rin had tears in her eyes but Chihiro failed to understand why until the word she needed floated to the surface of her mind.
"Pregnant?"
"You are only about a month gone," said Zeniba gently. "And it will be about five months until you feel anything. I can only guess at the gestation period, but I think it will be about fourteen months." Chihiro was not listening.
"I can't be pregnant I have an infertility spell on me!"
Zeniba smiled at her sadly. "Sometimes life finds a way around such measures; it's rare but it happens."
"Well, you could have warned me," muttered Chihiro, her mind still playing catch up.
"Is this stupid fate of mine part of this too?" Zeniba nodded.
Rage filled the human; she had been manipulated at every turn, but had no idea who was pulling the strings.
"So basically I'm knocked up, mate-less and have a prophecy to fulfil?" No one answered her.
Chihiro started to laugh, and found she could not stop. It was a bitter and twisted laugh of despair.
"Well, at least my critics can not say they told me so!" On a whim Chihiro lifted her bag up and tossed it out of the window.
"The Vodka!" cried Linca.
"The Chocolate!" cried Rin.
Chihiro picked up Haku's sword and felt almost immediately better to feel its weight in her hand. The human grinned to herself maliciously and swung the sheathed sword experimentally, then she tipped the sword up and pointed it at the ceiling.
"If you don't show yourself in ten minutes I'm burning this hovel to the ground then me and this sword are going to dish out some "righteous vengeance" without guidance!" Chihiro shouted at the ceiling. "Do you hear me?" she screamed. "You owe me for helping you bring your whelp into the world!"
No one thought to correct Chihiro for her blatant blasphemy, after all, she was holding a very powerful sword and was in an evil mood, and none of the spirits could blame her; they could only guess at how she must be feeling. Zeniba wanted to hug the child and let her cry but it seemed Chihiro was done with tears. The marks on her arms and the trauma of having her mate ripped from her were fanning the flames of her anger. Zeniba guessed it would be a while before she even accepted she was pregnant. Zeniba held out her hand and called Chihiro's name softly, but before she could get near the human, the sword swung round to point at the witch.
"Don't touch me," Chihiro hissed.
"Chihiro, please," said Zeniba carefully. "I know you are hurting, but insulting a goddess is not the way to…"
"I don't need your sympathy," Chihiro snarled. "What business is this of yours anyway? Why do you constantly feel the need to take an interest in my fate?"
"I'll admit that I have meddled where perhaps I should not have," sighed Zeniba. "However, I know that if I did not help guide you in the right direction, the prophecy could have fallen upon you before you had allies or an awareness of your future. The tools the gods choose tend to be used harshly or even broken. I did not want to see that happen to you."
"Why?" Chihiro snapped. "Why should you care as long as I do what I am supposed to?"
"You're my granddaughter," said Zeniba, holding her hands out, palms up.
"No, I'm not," Chihiro growled. "I have no grandmother; my father's mother died before I was born and my mother's mother died before she was even married." The tip of the sword wavered a little. "That makes you just a lonely old woman who meddles, doesn't it?"
The witch's eyes flashed with annoyance but she reigned in her temper. The girl was half mad with hunger and shock and the sword she was holding was designed for a dragon to master, not a human. Zeniba could sense that it was just itching for an excuse to shed blood and Chihiro was in no frame of mind to resist it. Zeniba smiled fondly at her; she was doing well considering.
"You are overtired and have not eaten or you would never say such things to me."
"You think so?" Chihiro scoffed. "Maybe I have wanted to say these things for a while."
"Perhaps," said the witch with a smile. "If that is the case then perhaps I'll tell you what you want to know but first let me ask you a question. Have you ever wondered why I helped you as a child?" The sword tip dipped a little.
"I don't know," said Chihiro at last. "But you nearly killed Haku." The sword tip inched up again.
"And I could have, if I wished," said Zeniba. "But when you broke the spell I decided to forgive him; but only because you asked me to. The golden seal could have ended you both back then, why would I be so merciful towards you?"
"I don't know," said Chihiro and the sword lowered slightly. "I never really thought about it." The sword's voice in her head rasped on about the witch manipulating her but Chihiro managed to ignore it.
"Well," Zeniba sighed. "That is very unusual, you normally question such things. But I believe I may have an explanation."
"Oh really?" drawled Chihiro in a very Haku-like way. "Then by all means, enlighten me."
"The reason is that family help each other and family members expect help from each other."
Chihiro was confused; the sword lowered a little more.
"I don't understand."
The witch's large mouth broke into a genuine smile. "When the water horse that insists on hanging around Haku's home told you that you had spirit blood in you, did it never occur to you that you might be related to someone you knew?"
"What are you saying?" breathed Chihiro, then her temper flared again. "For once just tell me straight and don't wrap it up in riddles!"
"I am saying that there is a reason this world appeals to you so much, that there is a reason I helped you that day when you came begging for Haku's life in my kitchen. There is a reason that you fell for a dragon and a reason that you now carry his child, despite precautions," said Zeniba calmly.
"Well what?" Chihiro snapped.
"You really are my granddaughter, Chihiro," Zeniba sighed. "We are blood relations."
"That's not possible." Chihiro breathed.
"It is," said the witch firmly. "And I will tell you how if you put down that sword." The sword clattered to the floor, falling from Chihiro's numb fingers.
"Yes, tell us all, if you would," said the Lady's voice from the window. They all turned to look at the goddess who was showing off her new slim figure in an impossibly tight black velvet dress.
"You have kept your secrets for a long time, witch. Tell the poor girl before she falls over, she looks awful." The Goddess turned her violet gaze on Linca. "You there, get us some food then we can all have a nice chat." Linca scuttled off as if burnt, closely followed by Rin. The Goddess turned to Chihiro, clearly displeased.
"You could have been a little more reserved in your address, even if you were angry at me."
Chihiro had no fight left in her. She sank to the ground and arranged her legs so she could sit.
"Just tell me what I need to know so I can decide what to do," she whispered. The Goddess smiled warmly.
"Food and a bath first; you look and smell dreadful."