Disclaimer: I don't own Labyrinth.

LEGEND

Riddles in the Dark

"Ya're…ya're a Sphinx!" Hoggle stammered, and the beast grinned nastily. Corner of his mouth twisted, and the dwarf could see a sharp row of shiny teeth flashing in the eerie light. He backed off.

"Of course I am. What did you think I was – a rodent?" The Sphinx snorted and wagged his tail.

"But, but…ya're a he!"

"Oh really!" He snorted. "A dwarf that can see! Would someone, please, kill me!" He cried and snarled at Hoggle, slowly circling around him and Cobweb. The dust flew in the air as his pawns hit the ground. "What did you think? That the Sphinxes are born of stone? Of course there are male Sphinxes too!"

Hoggle blushed viciously at his words, still trying to retreat, and halted. He looked around. "Where…where 're th' nightmares?" He stammered questioningly.

His tail sway up and down as a whip, and his mouth opened in a bored yawn. "I have nothing to fear from dreams. We Sphinxes do not sleep."

Hoggle stared at the beast, mouth jarred open. "But…" He scraped his head.

"They feared you," Cobweb said silently, "and everybody knows, they fear nothing…"

The Sphinx grinned at her while seating down, and scratched the back of his ear. Sharp obelisk claws flashed, and Hoggle yanked a frightened breath. The loud rasping echoed in the oubliette, and, glittering, like a gush of small diamonds, the dust fell down from his head. "They fear His Majesty," the Sphinx reminded, stretching his neck and lowered his pawn back on the ground.

"'Cause he created them…" Hoggle muttered, staring at his feet. "That sniveling pig…"

"Why now…" He said with a mock surprise. "It seems His Majesty has some ungrateful subjects."

"I'm no subject of him," Hoggle spat. "He sent me 'ere."

"With due reason, I assume…" The Sphinx snickered. "This oubliette is the most desolate and deepest one in the whole Underground. He sents here those committing the worst crime of them all…" His tone fell down as he leaned closer to two, "…a treason."

"I've done nothin' wrong!" Hoggle grumbled defensively.

He sat straight, watching the dwarf in spurn. "Yet, here you are."

"Oh, quit playing games!" Cobweb suddenly cried frustrated. "Just tell, why did you come?"

He rumbled displeased, rising on his pawns, and his tale wagged restlessly again. "I was commanded to guard here, beneath Nightfall's Land. And so few get here…." The Sphinx complained a disgusted frown on his beastly face.

"Ya wanna spend time with us?" Hoggle finally found courage to ask.

He halted and gave them a sly look, grinning. "I've become bored," he confessed. "I find nightmares tedious company."

"Oh?" Hoggle dampened his lips and briefly glanced at the fairy. "What did ya have in mind?"

He flashed his sharp teeth. "Guess…"

They looked at each other, and finally Hoggle turned to meet the monster. "Err… riddling, I takes, would be a safe bet?"

The answer they received was even deeper grin. "Whatever gave me away?" The beast asked amused.

"Somehow it figures…" Hoggle muttered and, eyeing the Sphinx, asked hesitantly, "I think we have no other alternative…?"

"The way I see…" He pretended to think for a while before answering, "…no."

Hoggle sighed desperately. "I'm no good at riddles. Ya should search some other to bother, ya know?"

"Oh! But that's precisely the joy in riddles..." He sounded smug at himself, "I always win."

"Wait a moment," Cobweb interrupted the gloating beast. "But what if we win instead?"

He barked out an amused laugh and bent closer. Hoggle shivered when feeling the breath of the beast against his skin. The beast smelled of wet soil, moss -- and something he nearly recognized, like an old book. Dust and age. "Fairy! You have no idea whom you are talking to…"

"It could be possible," Cobweb met the Sphinx's stony gaze unflinching. It occurred to Hoggle only then she didn't seem to be scared. "And even more important, we don't know the stakes that we would be playing for."

His face twisted in surprise as he stared at them. "Your lives of course!"

"But ya were gonna kill us anyway!" Hoggle cried out loud, staggering backwards and nearly tripped when his feet hit against a cold rock. The fairy whimpered at his movement and grasped tightly on his hands. Feeling her sharp claws boring into his skin, Hoggle suppressed a shout of agony. Regaining his balance, he hastily handed the fairy down.

"Oh no," The Sphinx sounded offended. "I was going to kill you slowly…" He explained and then smiled brightly. "But if you would happen to win, I'll be fair and grant you a swift death instead. There, am I not nice…?" He sounded enormously content with himself.

"Hardly nice…nor fair," Cobweb muttered, trying to tidy up her scrunched wings, and glared at the dwarf, before turning to look at the monster. "And you have the advantage anyway." The fairy accused.

"Precisely!" The Sphinx laughed delightedly. "And because I am the one giving the challenge, I shall start now. Tell me an answer to this -- or meet your death…" He took a breath and lowered his body down, pinning them down against the wall of the oubliette.

"Five hundred begins it, five hundred ends it,
Five in the middle is seen;
First of all figures, the first of all letters,
Take up their stations between.
Join all together, and then you will bring
Before you the name of an eminent king."

Hoggle scratched his head, staring at the beast. "Jareth…?" He finally asked questioningly.

The fairy hissed angrily and glared at the dwarf. "Idiot! Where do you see numbers in his name! David is the answer," She turned to meet the stonefaced creature and shouted, "David, we say! D is five hundred in its both ends; V is five in the middle, I is the number one and A is the first alphabet, and, therefore, also first figures. Together they create a name "David", who used to be a king." She noticed the dwarf staring at her and asked obnoxiously. "What? You thought we fairies couldn't read?"

The Sphinx snarled displeased. His stone tail waved restlessly as he stared at the fairy, "Very well. That is correct." He kept a small break, collecting his calm, and then turned to look at the dwarf. "It means it's your turn now." There was no doubt about it. He was leering. "Dwarf, you may ask…"

Hoggle paled and swallowed. Cursing that the only thing that came in his mind was a silly rhyme from that senseless fox, sir Didymus, he opened his mouth, briefly wondering what might have happened to him. Hoggle's heart ached a little at the thought of his old friend.

"I'm as plain to see as black & white.
I prefer to roam about at night.
Just don't attack or startle me
Or odiferous emissions may result you see.
I'm an omnivore yes it's true.
But what's my name tell me do.

He fell silent, shivering, and watched the beast contemplating his words. With good luck, the riddle would be so silly, the Sphinx have never even heard of it. The Sphinx stretched, correcting his position, and yawned. His teeth gleamed in the dark. And then, to Hoggle's terror, he grinned and answered,

"Yes I'm a Skunk it's Plain to see.
Just black and white, yes that's me.
Attack or startle me, and you'll know.
How far my stink can really go.
Plants & bugs I eat all sorts.
Just stay clear of me and my cohorts."

"A skunk?" The fairy gasped, turning around and, unbelievingly, stared at Hoggle. "You ask of skunks, in a place like this, from a creature like him?" She pointed at the Sphinx.

Hoggle shrugged his shoulders. "I'm no good at this…" He grumbled. "I told ya so. And tha' ain't mine riddle. I learnt it from a friend…"

"For heaven's sake! Then you've better not to try at all!" The fairy hissed and turned to look at the Sphinx. "It's my turn now." She said, stepping courageously forward. "Answer this, you beast!"

"A cloud was my mother,
the wind is my father,
my son is the cool stream,
and my daughter is the fruit of the land.
A rainbow is my bed,
the earth my final resting place,
and I'm the torment of man.
What am I?"

The Sphinx started to laugh. "That is a good one, little fairy," He said, the echo of his laughter still booming in Hoggle's ears, "But I have heard it from the stars. And the answer is rain." He was clearly enjoying himself when he asked a new riddle.

"A headless man had a letter to write;
It was read by a man who had lost his sight.
The dumb repeated it word for word;
And deaf was he who listened and heard."

The fairy sneered and, keeping her head up, answered, "Simple! The letter in question is the letter "O", because it is zero. And zero is nothing. Therefore, the man without a head has nothing to write, and the blind cannot read. Then, obviously, the mute person, unable to repeat nothing, could say nothing; and the deaf man listened and heard nothing."

"You are good at this," Hoggle muttered in awe, hesitant respect in his voice.

"What do you think we do all the time? Fly from a flower to flower. " Cobweb snorted obnoxiously, turning to look at him. "That would be boring, you must realize." She spun around and said, "It's my turn again." She started to speak so fast Hoggle couldn't follow her words. They sounded like a rain, a dream...He blinked his eyes, listening.

"Many-manned scud-thumper,
Maker of worn wood,
Shrub-ruster,
Sky-mocker,
Rave! Portly pusher,
Wind-slave."

The Sphinx remained silent for a long time, his eyes half-closed. He seemed to be in deep thoughts.

The silence stretched.

"Ya don't know!" Hoggle cried out at last, his heart fluttering in his chest. Maybe they could somehow bargain their way out of the situation after all?

At his word, he jerked up his head. "Of course I know!" The Sphinx said coldly. "I was just trying to remember who asked me the same riddle before." He fell in silence and spoke softly. "It was a runner, during the days I lived above in the light and the warmth, before I was placed to guard the treasures of the High King…" His voice wavered longingly and his expression turned tender, then he shook his head, shaking off his reveries, and looked up. "But, the answer is the ocean. I believe it's once again your turn, dwarf."

Hoggle stared blankly ahead, trying to remember something. He could feel Cobwen moving restlessly at his feet. Hoggle's thoughts wandered to the runner the fairy had accompanied, and he sighed. He missed Sarah. She would certainly invent something, like at the time just before the peach. He winced at the memory; he had been such a coward. Hoggle sighed again wondering if he was any better now. He smiled, ruefully at the thought, seeing it once again in front of his eyes like yesterday...

After his riddle, Didymus fell in silence, and Sarah burst in laughter. She laughed so much tears sprung from her eyes. "Truly, valiant sir knight," she said finally, comforting the crestfallen fox. "That was the most uplifting riddle I've ever heard…I honestly appreciated it, sir Didymus."

"Thou, milady, areth the most kind," he answered pleased, strutting his chest, and then asked. "But, pray, haveth thou also a riddle to tell?"

Hoggle wiggled his eyebrows, trying to remember. What had she told…? Oh, yes. He looked up.

"On a Sunday late afternoon in a mansion there was a house with a man dead in the library. The people in the house called the police. The police called a professor. The professor called the people who were working in the house. The driver said he was washing the car. The cooker said he was cooking. The person that was tidying said she was cleaning up. The laundry man said he was collecting the mail. The professor told the police to arrest the laundry man. Why didn't he arrest the other three?" Hoggle asked the Sphinx and prepared to hear the Sphinx laughing again.

Instead, the Sphinx stared at him, a curious expression on his face, twitching his ears, and then asked,

"What is a car?"