"Ashden, your cousin Taylor is on the phone." AJ squealed as she jumped off of her bed and raced for the phone. Her mother gave her a smile as she took the phone.

"Tay, I am so happy you called me. God I have needed to talk to you so badly." She moved at a slower pace back up to her room. "No ... Natty is great. She's starting to scoot around now. Ugh ... I don't wanna talk about John."

"Why not?"

Because he was a complete and total moron and thought I was seeing another guy behind his back and cheated on me that same day. When in reality I had found out that my biological father is not actually dead and was being comforted by a friend. Then he had the balls to be like it isn't what you think." AJ laughed.

"Ugh! Guys are so stupid." AJ couldn't have agreed more.

"Yep I totally used the 'what did you fall into her' line. I miss you so much Tay." She frowned a little.

"Well I was thinking this summer why not come on tour with me. Bring Natty too cause I have not seen her since she was like hours old."

"Really you would want me and Natalie to come on tour with you?" AJ asked a little surprised.

"Of course you freak." Taylor let out a hearty laugh. "The whole family wants too see her again. My mom was just on me the other day about telling you to send some new pictures."

"If you really want us with you then we are totally game." AJ decided.

"Then it's settled. You and my beautiful God daughter are traveling around the world with me this summer."

"Tay, you are playing on the radio." AJ announced.

"Then turn me up."

AJ did as she was requested and began blaring "You Belong With Me" as she danced around like an idiot. But she was laughing because she knew Taylor was doing the same thing on the other end.

--

John smiled as he watched his ex-girlfriend dance in her room. She had left her curtains tied back so he could see right into her room from his. She was wearing the little pajama shorts that he loved and a white tank top. He could see that she was on the phone, he sighed because she was probably talking to her cousin Taylor. There would be a song about him on the radio by the end of the year if that were the case.

"Son, what are you doing?" John Sr. asked as he walked into his second oldest son's bedroom.

"Watching AJ. Is that a crime now a days?" John got defensive.

"Technically yes. It's called being a peeping tom." He joined his son at the window. "You miss her don't you?"

"Yea I really do."

"Then why did you do what you did?"

"I guess I felt that I needed to hurt her before she left and hurt me." He scratched the back of his head. "That's what they do. They make you love them and then they leave and take what is left of your dignity and self-respect with them."

"John, just because your mother left me doesn't mean that all women are going to leave. It just means that me and your mom weren't cut out to be together. Now I supposed I could have your attitude and hate all women for the sins of one. But I choose to look at what I do have. Without your mother I would not have five very amazing sons. So I would take the heart ache I felt any day if it means at the end of the day I still have you guys."

"Do you think she'll forgive me?" John asked.

"Probably not. But maybe it's better that way. In a few months you are going to graduate high school and go to college. Maybe it is better not to be tied down to a girl and a baby. You know I love AJ and Natalie like they were my own daughter and granddaughter but maybe it is better for all of you to end things now rather than later."

"If it's for the best than why do I feel all dead inside?"

"Give it some time John. Things will get better."

John looked out his window again. AJ had left while they were talking and returned with Natalie in her arms. She began spinning around in circles with the baby. Then they both crash landed on her bed. Both of them laughing.

"But I love them both so much."

"Let them go."

John walked over to his desk and grabbed a sharpie and a piece of paper. He wrote out I'm sorry and I still love you before taping it to his window and closing his curtains.

--

It was AJ's turn to look out the window. It was sometime later and she had Natalie on her hip. "What should Mommy do about this Princess?" Natalie looked up at her mother as she gummed on her teething ring. "You miss him don't you?" Natalie removed her teething ring from her mouth and blew a raspberry right into her mother's face. John had taught her how to do that. "I will take that as a yes." She grimaced as she wiped the baby saliva off of her face.

She propped Natalie up against her pillows on her bed and grabbed her own piece of paper and a sharpie. After deliberating on what she was going to write for about ten minutes she wrote the words I'm sorry also but then added but I cannot forgive you.