Angel in Demons

Rated: T

Chapter 13: Scent

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha otherwise I would've been rich!

Rin lie sleeplessly on her bed staring at the roof quietly. Everything had been a dream. Him coming through the window, asking for her, making love to her, crying in her arms, it was all a dream. It was all like a dream to her. Kagome and Inuyasha had both decided that for now, it was best to just leave Rin in the palace and let her recover mentally. But even they had duties to their village so it was decided that they would return to their village and come to check up on her after a few weeks.

Rin didn't want it any other way either, owing to how she didn't want to be around them at the moment either. She just wanted to be left alone with Sesshomaru. She wanted to have him for herself. She wanted to spend every waking and sleeping minute with him like she always used to as a child. She wanted to do all that she always dreamed of doing. And she knew that once the human folk left, she would be free to do as she pleased around him as there would be no boundaries. No one ever came into the main palace to ever come across Sesshomaru except Jaken so she needn't hide her scent either. It was all that she could dream of.

Yet it had been three sunrises since Inuyasha people left and she had not seen Sesshomaru's face. She spent the whole day idly waiting for him to return only to never have him come back. She would constantly ask Jaken but the green youkai did not know the answer to that himself. If Rin's persistent questions weren't enough, the lack of knowledge towards his Lord's whereabouts was boiling his blood and eating him alive.

"This is all your fault! You would have surely done something to upset him, stupid Rin!" Jaken pointed his Two-Headed Staff at Rin.

Rin didn't look back at him but just kept staring at the roof. She didn't understand where she went wrong. She couldn't point it out because surely from what she could remember, Sesshomaru seemed very pleased by her. His tears had another meaning entirely. But then why had he not once spoken to her or even met her ever since that night. That morning she woke up to have him gone and he had been gone ever since. She wanted to know. She wanted to see him, if not anything else, then just to ask him where she went wrong.

"Sesshomaru-sama…" Rin whispered to herself.

The day passed by and the sun finally set. It was yet another day passed and he had still not returned. Jaken had left for his quarters cursing Rin all the way through at her insolence.

She took the blankets off and then covered herself with them like a robe so she could walk around without feeling cold. Then she got up to her feet from her bed and walked towards the window. There was nothing but a treacherous blizzard outside which was murderous to even a youkai. She would be foolish to worry about Sesshomaru as he was Daiyoukai born and raised in such an environment but for how long could she wait for him like this?

She stared outside for a minute before wearing her sandals and putting on her full kimono. Then she covered herself with her blankets again, head to toe full, and with an unflinching resolve, ran down to the main gate and then opened them. It was not only stupid but she had done this without once waiting and thinking about the outcome. She had a history with rashness but none this wild.

A burst of wind hit her exposed eyes and she closed them quickly so as to not damage them. It was cold, very cold, but with the amount of cloth she had on, she could barely support its weight, so it was good in the weather for a little while.

Against the wind, she pushed herself forwards and lowered her head to protect her eyes. But in the blinding snow like this, how was she to find him? But then she thought that he could smell her from anywhere so if he was even remotely nearby, he would smell her out and surely come for her. It wasn't an act of damsel in distress but rather a desperation to have him come back.

After only a few feet, though, she started to feel the splintering wind coarse through her layers of cloth to her skin. Initially the cold seemed to be barred but even Rin knew that the cloth would hold for only so before slowly becoming useless until she began shivering. Her feet started to stagger and slip in the hardened snow and her socks were almost at the verge of getting wet. If they did, she would surely get a frost-bite. She didn't know how long she could hold herself up so, at the top of her lungs, she began to scream out Sesshomaru's name.

"Sesshomaru-sama!"

Her eyes became so dry that even her tears could not keep them open. Her bones began to ache and her feet became numb. She could feel the water freeze around her eyes and this scared her. That fear itself made her lose the last of her strength.

But as soon as she knew that she couldn't go on any further, two arms grabbed her from behind and enclosed around her waist. And the next thing she knew, she stood where through her eyelids, she could see light around her.

Everything at that moment happened so fast that she couldn't even register her surroundings too well.

The cold from moments ago had not left. With the layers she had on herself, now they were only sustaining the cold instead around her. But her feet and her eyes finally felt the warmth of the room. They did not stop hurting. It was most likely that they were at the verge of paralysis from the extreme change. But she tried not to think about it.

The arms around her did not let go. She looked down at them to see red markings on white of his kimono with his hands hidden inside the sleeves and gave a very faint smile at knowing who it was. Her idea worked. He came. She knew he would come. Even if he hated her, she knew that he would still come.

She stood still next to his body for as long as her legs would allow. She could not feel his warmth from the layers but she still felt him enough to calm down before her aching legs gave out because of the cold which would take some time to leave her. She slipped through his arms down to the ground. She expected him to hold her up only to find that he just let her slip down. Rin fell to the ground and, in shock, looked up at Sesshomaru.

He was the same Sesshomaru that he was always. The same nonchalant expression pasted itself on his face, the same brilliant gold eyes and soft silver hair falling over his back to his knees.

"S-Sesshomaru-sama…?" Rin stuttered, wanting to know what had happened. "W-Where had you been gone…?"

Sesshomaru did not reply but instead just kept staring at the fireplace. Rin could not read him at all.

Rin felt encapsulated and her movement was being hindered by the quilt around her. So she slipped out of it and left it on the floor and began to force herself back on her feet. But before she could force herself up on her still-trembling legs, she felt Sesshomaru's arms take a firm hold of her shoulders. She blinked blankly at what was going on and the next thing she knew, she was pinned against the wall right next to the fireplace.

Rin looked up at Sesshomaru's face only to find his soft golden turned to grass green surrounded by a bleeding red. She could feel his blood pulsating through him from his hands. She had never ever felt his heartbeat like this before. She couldn't understand what was happening. Everything was happening too fast for her. She couldn't register thing at his pace. But as Sesshomaru's purple marks began to extend below his eyes, she felt her body ease. Her eyes fixated on his still lips. Even without any comprehension of the current situation, she wanted to reach out to him.

She leaned forward as much as Sesshomaru's grip could allow her and tried to reach his lips. But she couldn't. The moment she felt his breath on her lips, the grip on her shoulder tightened and Sesshomaru threw her to side towards the bed. She fell on the bed and her heart began to race in slight fear of what he had just done. Sesshomaru had done a lot of things in his life but nothing like this. He had never intentionally tried to hurt Rin, ever.

"S-Sesshomaru-sama…" She whimpered, trying to sit up straight on the bed.

He turned around from the wall and stared at her with blood-thirsty eyes. His fangs started protruding and he began to breathe heavily. The sound of his youkai voice growling made Rin's heart skip a beat.

Rin backed up a little as Sesshomaru stood there facing her with blood-shot eyes. She couldn't understand what was happening or why it was happening. He had been gone for three days and now that he was back, he was acting like a youkai gone loose of humanity from his eyes. As she examined him with fear-struck eyes did she go down to notice his claws. They were extended and covered in dry blood. They had been hidden in the sleeves before so she didn't notice but they were completely filled with blood.

Rin jumped off the bed to her feet and started to move slowly towards the door. Her mind was becoming such a mess that she didn't know what to do at that moment. But the blood on his hands were enough to strike terror within her. But just as she was about to creep away towards the door, she looked into his eyes one last time.

Nothing. She was expecting nothing. But there was indeed something in them. Something she had never seen in Sesshomaru. She stopped in her tracks and gazed into them as her soul could possibly allow. They seemed so familiar. They looked like… Inuyasha's eyes.

Rin's heart skipped a beat as she recalled every time that Inuyasha obtained these eyes. It was every time he lost control of his human/ hanyou self and was dominated by the incomplete youkai within him. But Sesshomaru was a full youkai, a Daiyoukai for that, then why?

"S-Sesshomaru-sama… Its me… Rin…" Rin spoke softly.

Sesshomaru's hands were trembling and so was his body. He was shaking all over. But was he conscious of what he was doing?

"Sesshomaru-sama… can you hear me?" She asked, still standing still in her tracks. "Sesshomaru-sama, please try to get a hold of yourself…"

She took a step forward with still trembling feet. She wanted to let go of the fear, she wanted to stop trembling but her humane self wasn't allowing her. She wanted to find a way to bring him back. But in the process of wanting to do so, failed to notice the rolled up mass of cloth on the floor that she had taken off of herself. And resulting from that lack of attention to the surroundings was Rin falling face-first, on the ground.

"Ow…" She winced in pain and rubbed her forehead as she turned to lie straight from the fall.

But as she looked up, Sesshomaru was looking down at her with his usual, soft eyes again.

"S-Sesshomaru-sama…?" Rin asked, letting go of her forehead and staring at him from the ground.

"Rin, you are still as clumsy as before." He stated before walking from above her and out the room.

She kept staring at the roof trying to understand, to even closely comprehend, what just happened.

'How can he just walk away like nothing happened? Does he really not remember anything!' She thought.

She got up to her feet and stomped her way out the room and towards Sesshomaru who was now found sitting on his chair with his hands already clean.

"Sesshomaru-sama, do you remember what just happened? You had red eyes and-" Rin got cut off.

"I'm not stupid like my brother to not know what I'm doing when I'm in my fully taken youkai form, Rin. You need not remind me of what I did in it. I was in full control of everything." Sesshomaru blankly stated, closing his eyes.

Rin stood there for a second before nodding. Now she felt stupid. Of course he was in control. He was Sesshomaru-sama, the Daiyoukai. How could she be foolish enough to think that he had lost control?

"G-Gomen…" Rin apologized, lowering her head a little.

She felt like a little child in front of him at that moment. Her brought her hands together and joined them in nervousness.

"Sesshomaru-sama, you did not come back for-" Rin got cut off again by Sesshomaru.

"Yes, I did not. I don't need your permission or approval to go anywhere Rin; I hope you understand that already." Sesshomaru spoke with a hint of taunt in his tone.

Rin heard his emotionless tone and felt her heart shatter. It was really as if that night had not happened at all. But every moment of it, every sigh and every tear was still burning in her mind, from that night.

She lowered her head further and stood silently, but had no tears to shed anymore. She got what she wanted. She was the one who asked for him. Hadn't she known him long enough to know that he isn't one to show any sort of affection?

"Jaken, stop hiding behind the door and go back to your chambers." Sesshomaru stated to the closed door of the Main Hall connecting to the corridor.

Rin heard a high pitched yelp after which a few sounds of scrambling feet followed. Jaken had been standing behind the door most probably because he had sensed his master return. But it was obvious that Sesshomaru did not want anyone around him.

Rin slowly started turning around to leave the main hall when Sesshomaru spoke, "Next time, be careful with your scent Rin."

Rin looked up at the door she was facing now and then instantly turned around back towards the porcelain figure that was her master. Her eyes were slightly teary and she had an expression of desperation pasted on her face.

"But Sesshomaru-sama, I was covered with two layers of quilt which was in Jaken-sama's scent! No other youkai could have-" She tried to explain, stretching her arms out and letting the arms of her pink kimono flap around.

But before she could finish her sentence, she found Sesshomaru inches away from her, looking down at her from his perfect posture.

Rin took a step back out of imbalance due to the surprise. He was already standing still when he went backwards; he was too fast for even her reflexes. She instantaneously looked up his face before her eyes widened in shock of what she was doing. At the moment, she could not be looking at him like that. He was still her Lord after all. She quickly looked down to her hands again, her breath still disturbed by Sesshomaru's actions.

"No Rin, be careful of your scent around me." He spoke silently.

Rin kept staring up at the stoned ground in bewilderment. She did not understand at all of what he was saying. He had never had problems with her scent before so why now…? She didn't look up because she still had sense enough to not be disrespectful of him.

But as soon as she tried to make sense of what Sesshomaru had been saying, his warm left hand rested on her cheek softly and pulled her face up to look directly into his eyes.

"Especially when you so careless throw away that quilt."

And with that, standing silently, Rin was left alone. In that split second, Sesshomaru disappeared into his room leaving Rin standing with nothing but awe and loss in her eyes. She didn't understand. Did her scent suddenly start bothering him? Or did her scent make him want to attack her?

She wanted to know what she was for him but with this, things had become so much more complicated. If he couldn't stand her scent, how could she be foolish enough to think that he'd want to have her as his mate? Did he really not at all find pleasure in the night that they spent together? Had she really been a naïve little child all this while?

Regret filled her body as she felt pain still linger silently through her, coursing rapidly along her bloodstream, the pain of the memory of how he took her. Was it really all in vain?

She began to shiver at the thought of it all. She had chosen to give her all to her Lord the day he brought her back to life. She had chosen to vow to do anything for him. She wanted to be his relief, his joy, his hope, his strength. Yet she couldn't be any of them. At the end, she always ended up a burden.

Her eyes started to fill up with desperation and insanity. Everything that she ever wanted had been right in front of her and then suddenly, collapsed. Everything shattered. She had truly believed that after they spent the night together, they would become one. She believed that once he shed his tears in front of her, he would open up; that he would let her in. Yet it was the exact opposite. He shut her out even more. He couldn't stand her anymore.

"No…" She whispered to herself as she thought of how she had lost everything. "No… No!"

Her whispers became louder and louder and her whole body raced with insanity and hopelessness. She was at that point when she didn't understand nor care of what she was doing that but she would do anything to gain what she had wanted all this time. She was going to try until she died, try to be what she wanted to be for him. She was now being stupid and disrespectful. She knew. She was fully aware but desperation leads one to do the impossible. It was already obvious to her that after knowing Sesshomaru for this long, she was the one who was wrong to believe that he was give into her. But it was far too late to get herself to accept that.

She took heavy steps towards his room and then without knocking, opened it wide.

Sesshomaru looked towards her and stared carelessly. His eyes were slightly narrow at how she entered without knocking.

"S-Sesshomaru-sama… do you not want Rin at all…?" Rin said.

Her voice sounded like that of a crazy child who had just lost all grip to humanity and sanity. Her head was tilted and her hands were clutching the collar of her Kimono.

She took a step forwards and Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes deeper at that thought of what she was about to do.

"Rin, wait." He spoke hurriedly but he was still too late.

Rin had put full force on the collar and pulled it down to her shoulders, exposing her neck and shoulders clearly with her hair drawn back to her back.

"Sesshomaru-sama… do you not want Rin…?" She asked again in the same sick tone.

Inside, Rin was crumbling and becoming lost. She knew that she had lost. She was fighting to get a hold of reality. She was trying to somehow compose herself and not do something even more foolish. This was wrong. She knew it was wrong, she was taunting him. She knew that she was turning herself into an object, thinking that it was only lust that brought him to her. She was throwing herself to him like a wretched whore.

On the opposite end, Sesshomaru's eyes suddenly coveted blood and the rims became green. His fangs seared out and the purple markings began to stretch out. His hands began to shake lightly as he tried to grip control over himself.

He put a foot out to balance himself and then, in a coarse and heavy dual voice said, "Get out of here!"

The Rin who stood there like a rag doll heard the voice boom like she had never heard before and straightened up. She blinked and in an instant, grabbed hold of reality. She looked up straight to Sesshomaru to see him barely holding himself back. It scared her, the sight of him like that. But inside her was not the fear of his eyes or fangs, but the fear of defeat which she had just gained. She had lost in front of him and herself. He would never be hers. All her dreams shattered once again. All her hopes crumbled. Why was fate so cruel to her?

She took a hold of her collar again and pulled it up to fix her kimono. With trailing tears, she bowed in apology and with some fallen tears, turned out to leave the room.

She would go back to the village and get her things. She had had enough of fake promises and lies. Everyone lied to her. She would go far away where no one would know her or ever find her. There, she would live alone and never trust anyone. No one deserved trust. At that moment, not even Sesshomaru.

She was bitter as she was before. Yes, she wanted this; she wanted him to take her. But if he had to just discard her in the end, then it was just as much his fault. She had never in her years with him, thought he would do something this despicable to her. He knew that she wanted to be with him for as long as her human body would allow her, yet he treated her like an asset.

No, Sesshomaru could never be this disgusting. She believed she knew him this much to never do anything pointlessly. Then did he spend the night with her out of pity? He knew she wanted him so he decided, as repentance, to give her what she wanted.

As she wiped her tears and took a step forward, she bumped into a firm body.

She opened her eyes to see a black layer of armor right in front of her. Her eyes widened and she dared not look up anymore with those tear-filled eyes at her master.

His warm left hand sat on her cheek again, this time, firmer. He slowly pulled up her to look into her chocolate eyes.

Her blinks became shorter and her legs began to give out at the purity of the gold in his eyes.

"Your scent gets to me…" He whispered lightly with the same expression.

"W-why…?" Rin dared to ask back, still looking in to his eyes in a trance.

He then bent down after hearing her question and whispered even more lightly in her left ear, "… Because it is no longer yours but an amalgamation of mine…"

A shiver ran down Rin's spine at everything that was happening. The earth beneath her feet was coming back to her. She was gripping back on her dreams again.

Rin stood still, not being able to move from the trance that his low voice and soft breath had put her in. She wanted to break loose but she couldn't no matter how hard she tried.

Sesshomaru moved away and looked into her eyes again before giving a very brief, sly smile and bending down to kiss her lips. It wasn't a kiss, but a brush of his lips against hers.

Rin's lips quivered at the want for more but the desperation to hold back before he did what he wanted to. She was at a loss of foresight. She didn't know what he wanted or what he would do. She didn't care. She didn't have the strength to respond either. She just stood still and waited for him.

As soon as the brush was over, Sesshomaru's lips captured Rin's like a vulture feeds on its prey. It wasn't delicate, nor filled with love but only filled with an insatiable want. A lust to reign over her fragile self. This time he would overpower her like she did, him, last time.