A.N. Hey, guys!
Alright, so this is the beginning of the six-month chapters, which will be basically formatted as such. Unfortunately, Rachel only gets one of this chapters, but Gar doesn't get any day sections in this part, so I feel it's only fair he get most of the month ones.
Alright, I've got one warning before I do the dedications/thank yous:
There will be other people in the Gar/Rachel ship.
Gar's got Terra, and Rachel's got…well, read on, and you'll find out.
So, don't be coming at me with pitchforks because I'm widening the stories love triangle to a love square, okay?
I love yous to:
Banana Luvs Myths Sweetnsxy, fei. fie. fo. fum, and BUTTERCUPISME for following!
nusicqueen124 and BUTTERCUPISME for favoriting.
God, will I ever be able to spell that correctly?
And of course, to Chickie-Poo, Guest, Guinea. Pig. Ninja, BUTTERCUPISME, musicqueen124, Katwizzle, Curse you Perry the Platypus, jaytennis, and sweetnsxy for reviewing!
Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop
January
She doesn't really know when she really realizes what's happened.
She thinks that it might've been watching him walk away, wondering how the hell she was supposed to move on.
Or, it could've been seeing the hurt in Jessi's eyes, the disappointment and sadness.
But maybe the moment that hit her home the most was when, in a burst of energy, she logged onto her email account and noted that she had one new message.
From Terra.
It contained two simple words, two words that sent her spiraling into a well of self-pity.
Thank you.
She doesn't really know when the numbness ends and the aching begins.
She can't pinpoint the moment when she suddenly understood that she's, for all intents and purposes, given up her first love.
But then again, isn't that why it's called a first love?
First loves are the testing zones, the time to try out attractions, the time to have your heart broken and gain knowledge about the game everyone plays.
So, then, she thinks, if first loves are meant to be disposable, then why does she feeling like she's being stabbed every time she thinks of him?
She decides that first loves are disposable, but first heartbreaks are like tattoos.
She spends the next week typing into her computer, writing a meaningless love story, one with a beautiful damsel in distress and a happy ending.
And then she thinks about Gar and Terra, and she decides right then and there that there's no such thing as a true happy ending.
She turns on the radio once, because she thinks that if Kiss Me runs through her head one more time, she'll go crazy.
So she turns it on, just in time to hear the beginning of Miss Me, by Andy Grammer.
She listens to it silently, letting the words wash over her.
And I promise you this…you're gonna miss me…miss me…
She throws a shoe at the radio, knocking it off of her desk, and collapses on her bed.
She spends the next two weeks curled up on her bed, not crying, not screaming, and certainly not showing any signs of her inner pain.
Kole and Joseph come by every day, but eventually she starts pretending that she's not home, and the only thing that gives her any remote joy is hearing them talk and laugh in the unique, one-sided way they have.
The only time she wishes they'd leave is when it starts getting romantic and she can hear them kissing from her bedroom.
When that happens, she pulls the covers over her head and curls into a ball.
Eventually, Karen comes with Kole and Joseph, and she sits on Rachel's stomach until she gets up and forces her to clean her room.
And while she's going through the piles of old, ratty clothes, she finds a hoodie.
The hoodie Gar had given her when Reggie had cut her stomach and they'd had to remove her shirt.
She slowly lifts it to her nose and gives it one small sniff.
And then she curls back into her ball, clutching the hoodie against her again, and for the first time she can remember, she cries.
She stays like that for a few days.
But then, Jessi comes, and she knows that she can't live like that anymore.
"Get the hell up, Rachel." Jessi says flatly.
Rachel raises her head slightly, blinking. "No."
In one swift motion, Jessi grabs her arm and pulls her off of her bed, dragging her down the hall and shoving her in the bathroom.
"Look, Rachel Roth, as your best friend, I'm calling an intervention. You missed my wedding dress fitting. You've spent literally three of the four weeks in a month curled on your bed, throwing a pity party. In case you're stupid or something, I'm not sending Kole and Joe here so they can be sexually active without anyone walking in. I'm sending them in because you are on the brink of a depression. You've lost so much weight that you look like you're drowning in your clothes. All of this over a guy. So, Rachel, let me lay this out: I am going to give you an outfit and we are going to go shopping so you don't look like a freaking drowned otter, and if we happen across a good-looking, halfway decent guy, I promise you, Rachel, you are going to talk to him. This is not a suggestion, this is an order. So, get dressed, and if you're not ready in ten minutes, I am going to drag you naked into the store, and we will get stared at and probably sued for public nudity. Am I clear?" She hisses.
Rachel glares up at her and sits down in her tub, the message clear: Make me. I dare you.
When Jessi turns on the freezing water and pours the showerhead all over her, she's so surprised she can't even get angry.
When Jessi grabs her hand, still wet, and forces her, still wet and in four sizes too large, out the door and hails a taxi, she literally goes into shock.
But she goes anyway, and she tries on everything Jessi hands her, and she even laughs a little when Jessi pulls out Flash's credit card to pay, saying primly that "We both knew it was time you got some help."
And then, they're trying to catch a taxi and a soft voice says, "I can help, if you want."
She whirls around, sure, for a second, that it's Gar.
But it's not.
It's a redhead.
She allows herself a minute to compare.
Chestnut waves where Gar is dark-haired.
Blue-eyed where Gar is brown-eyed.
Obviously muscular where Gar is wiry.
Tattooed where Gar is bare.
Pretty much the anti-Gar.
"Oh, that's okay, we're good-" Jessi starts.
"Why? Afraid I'll drag you off to my cave and have my way with you?" He smirks. "I promise I'll behave."
"I guess…" Jessi says, raising an eyebrow. "But I've got Mace. And a fiancée worth more than your entire neighborhood."
"Dully noted, " He smirks again.
He then puts his lips together for a high-pitched whistle, and seemingly out of nowhere, a yellow and black Gotham United cab appears.
Jessi grins and thanks him, sliding in with the bags.
"No problem. Hey, if anyone's feeling particularly reckless and idiotic, I'm planning to ride my motorcycle around, and I've got an extra helmet. I could give you a ride?"
Rachel, who is already halfway in the cab, opens her mouth to say no.
But then she thinks about what she's currently got waiting for her, and she decides that maybe a little recklessness is just what she needs.
So she smiles at Jessi, whose mouth flops open and hits the cab floor even as she drives away, and she walks with the man back to the motorcycle, and she gets on.
The wind is stinging her face, the cold January air filling her lungs and mind with an icy clarity, and she wants to actually laugh because this man is the opposite of Gar in so many ways, but she's thinking it might not be that bad, having an anti-Gar around.
She knows that she's using him as a means to make herself whole again, and she knows that's horrible, like, Terra-horrible, but she lets him drive her home anyway.
And she lets herself enjoy it.
As she gets off of the motorcycle in front of her apartment building, she hands him her phone so she can use both her hands to steady herself. She's never ridden a motorcycle before, but she decides then that she likes it, a lot.
He hands her the phone back, and she smiles shyly, opening her mouth to thank him, suddenly self-conscious.
When he kisses her full on the mouth, the mischievous glint in his eyes rendering her immobile, she thinks she can feel her heart pooling around her feet.
His hands go around her waist, and she can feel the warmth and solidness of them through her huge sweatshirt.
The first thing she realizes is that he smells different.
Gar smells woodsy and free, like pine needles and wintergreen, sort of like freedom and wildness would smell, if they had a smell.
This man –she realizes around then that she doesn't know his name- smells of smoke and ashes and a slight hint of Old Spice, of maple and caramel.
When he pulls away, she sees the glint again, and she knows that she'll remember that the most.
His smell, and his eyes.
He gives her a devilish smile as he puts his hands in his pocket.
She feels her brain melting away, so she says the first thing she can think of.
"My name's Rachel Roth."
He laughs.
"I'm Jason, Rachel Roth. Jason Todd."
A.N. And so the wheel turns.
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