Iambic Prose has taken over my life at this point I swear. So this is Iambic Prose and in this Andrew is fully human.

Enjoy.

Coffee Shops Are The Worst

::

"Sam, I'm telling you, this is the worst place to work. Ever." Danny Fenton continued scrubbing the counter he worked behind as he complained to his childhood friend, who was sitting on a bar stool and sipping at her coffee slowly, looking more amused than sympathetic at her friend's complaints.

"Your problem is that you haven't been laid in a long time." At the sputtering she got in return she only grinned, snickering as the other flipped her off. "Come on, you're a nineteen-year-old half-ghost college student. You should at least make an effort to have a one-night stand or something."

"Sam I will kill you and keep your ghost in the Fenton Thermos for all eternity," Danny growled, throwing a napkin at her head before walking away to serve another customer. When he came back even more depressed Sam raised an eyebrow. "The people who come here are mean, Sam. They ask for crazy, impossible things and then get angry when I tell them that no, we really can't do that to our coffee."

"Why do you still work here, then?" Sam asked, reaching for a cookie kept in an aged basket, Danny catching the dollar she tossed his way. "I mean, every time I come visit you at work you look ready to go ghost and kill someone."

"I work here because I'm a very poor college student and nowhere else would hire me- Well, they did, but then, you know, ghost attack."

"Ah." The two were silent as Danny served another three customers, each more rude than the last and each time Danny getting more and more irritated. "Okay, seriously, when was the last time you actually got laid?"

"For God's sake, Sam!" Danny hissed, blush on his cheeks, "Just because you're my former girlfriend does not give you the right to ask about my sex life!" At the few looks shot their way he huffed and went back to scrubbing at the spotless counters.

"It's my right as best friend," Sam pointed out, snickering, "And the fact you broke up with me because we found out you did not like girls like you thought you did. So now it's my job to make sure you have someone to be with. So-"

"If you ask one more time I will do something very violent. Like make your coffee de-cafe next time you order." Sam only waved the threat off, looking unconcerned.

"I wasn't going to, I was going to ask if there was anyone you had a crush on around campus." Seeing the light flush of her friend's cheeks she smirked. Jackpot. "So...what's his name?"

"Fuck off."

"Rude, Danny. Rude." Hearing the door bell ring they both looked up, Sam shocked at seeing Danny's wide smile as a guy she had only seen a few times around campus before came in.

"Andrew! Been awhile, get trapped in that library again?"

"It was one time, Fenton." Andrew Riter, 22-year-old English Major, rolled his eyes as he walked to the counter, flashing Sam a polite smile. "You really need to let it go, it was an accident."

"Because of you I was trapped under a shelf of Christmas poems for the rest of the day," Danny huffed, already starting on the man's order, which Sam found interesting. Danny was not good at remembering coffee orders. "It was nightmarish."

"You're overreacting," Andrew waved off, grinning while pulling out his wallet, before he could however Danny cut him off.

"No! No messing with the coffee scores! You know the rules!" At the dry look he was given Danny huffed and crossed his arms resolutely. "You bought coffee last time so this time it's my turn, rules apply even when I'm at work! We've discussed this!"

"Fine, fine, have it your way," Andrew grumbled, putting his wallet up as Danny disappeared into the back to fetch what he needed.

"And if you anonymously try to tip me again I'll know!" Danny shouted, just around the corner. At Andrew's baffled and innocent stare he narrowed his eyes. "Don't play innocent, I know it was you!" A second later and Sam and Andrew were left alone, Sam staring at Andrew intently.

"You're Andrew, right? The guy Danny never shuts up about?"

"I suppose so, yes," Andrew smiled. "Although it's surprising he talks about me that much, we haven't had many chances to interact what with finals being so close." Sam nodded, reaching for the chalkboard that told the barista's name and the special of the day. Erasing what was on there she quickly wrote something new, propping it back up and making Andrew slap a hand over his mouth to hide his laughter.

Getting himself under control he pulled out his phone and sent a text, Sam smiling approvingly as Andrew tried not to laugh at what was on the chalkboard again.

"Alright, coffee is now- Why are you laughing- What lies did she tell you?!" Danny shouted, pointing an accusing finger at a grinning Sam. Andrew only chuckled, taking his coffee and smiling.

"No lies or slander, I promise. Nice seeing you again, Danny." Flashing a smile that Sam noticed made Danny turn an interesting shade of pink they watched him exit the shop. Once gone Sam turned and gave Danny a look.

"What- What, no. No. Sam, no. I swear-" Seeing he was getting nowhere Danny sighed, shoulders slumping. "I am head-over-heels in love with that man, I swear. It's pathetic, Sam. It's so pathetic. I am so pathetic. I spilled coffee on myself the other day thinking about him, it's gotten that bad. No- No do you know how bad it is?!" Sam was suddenly regretting coming to visit her friend at work. Especially since he had bottled up his emotions this badly.

"I was in town the other day shopping, right? I mean, just looking through stuff and and browsing right, right?! So I go into a bookstore and I'm not even thinking about it and I have this book of poems in my hand, Sam, POEMS. And you know what I do? I say to myself 'Oh, I bet Andrew would like this.' Sam, Sam I am not used to this. It is bordering on obsessive how much I care for him!"

"Danny." Getting an overwhelmed look from her friend she sighed and gestured to his pocket. "Get your phone and check your messages."

"Wha-"

"Just do it your dork." Grumbling he did as told, scrolling through his messages. Sam supposed he had found the one Andrew had sent when he wasn't looking considering his face had gone very pale and then very red. "This is why I am your best friend. Because without me you would never get dates."

"...what witchcraft did you use on him," Danny half-whispered, looking morbidly curious. When Sam picked up the chalkboard and turned it towards him Danny had to work not to start screaming at her. Or blushing. Although judging by Sam's look he rather failed on the not blushing part. "Sammy...I hate you."

Today Your Barista is : 1. Hella Fucking Gay. 2. Desperately Single. 3. Absolutely In Love With You

For Your Drink Today I recommend : You Ask Him Out Already He's Going Crazy

Sam is the only reason Danny has a love life. She should be appreciated.