Not gonna lie I hated writing this chapter which is probably why it's taken so long. I find stuff like this actually more awkward then chapter 11 (I think it was chapter 11) to write so yeah... I hope my awkwardness doesn't show too much in this chapter and it isn't too bad.

Thank you again for the wonderful support you've all shown me. I love reading all your comments and asks etc.

So without further ado I'm just gonna get on with this haha. Hope you enjoy xx

P.s. Again this is definitely an M rated chapter. ;)

Chapter Fourteen

Nikki

When she opened the door to me she hadn't changed. She was still wearing her fitted black knee length dress and black heels. I hadn't either. I'd literally went into my house, grabbed a handful of toiletries and bits, some work clothes, some round the house or workout clothes, and some clean underwear. Then I'd turned around and left again straight away, not bothering to change out of my skinny black work trousers and plum coloured shirt.

I took a second longer to look at her. One thing had changed, she now had no make-up on and her face was tear stained. "Oh babe, come here" I dropped my bag on the floor and pulled her into a hug.

"She's right though, why would you want to be with me. I'm nothing but a bitch, all I do is upset everyone and piss them off, why didn't you just run before when I gave you the chance?"

"So that's what that was about, not you running away this time but you thinking you're not good enough for me? Lorri that's bullshit and we both know it."

"No, we don't" she looked at me, cheeks red and sore looking from all the crying she'd obviously been doing since we went our separate ways in the car park.

"Yes, we do. At least I do." I pulled her towards me and slowly started kissing her, still aware of the conversation from the previous day, but knowing that nothing mattered more now than showing her how much she meant to me.

After a few minutes of kissing in her doorway we broke apart and walked into the house. I shoved my stuff onto the floor in her room (there was no point putting it in the guest bedroom we both were more than aware of where I was going to end up again tonight) and then headed into the living room.

"Now everyone knows" she whispered, looking at me uncertainly.

"I know, but I guess at least that means we're allowed to make out in your office now."

She couldn't stop a small smile appearing on her face. "Hey I don't think so, I'm sure we had some rules about behaviour in the work place." Her face fell again. "But that's not just what I meant."

I nodded, understanding. "About you at school and stuff? Lorraine you really think they're all that interested in how much you got at school? They're far too busy worrying about how much they're getting... and possibly a little bit about how much you're getting now." I teased.

"Well maybe we should give them something to really talk about then" she said, looking at me suddenly with a look in her eyes I couldn't quite place. Feistiness, determination, passion, anger, love... a mixture of all of them perhaps?

And then I was being hauled to my feet and dragged to the bedroom, pushed backwards on the bed as she straddled me and began kissing me with as much force as she could master.

"Lorraine, wait" she stopped, and I could see the fear in her eyes. "Are you sure about this beautiful?"

"I've never been surer about anything else in my entire life. I'm so sick of all of this. All of this drama; all of this shit. I'm so sick of spending my whole life worrying about what other people think. Because in the end Nik people are always going to gossip, aren't they? So you know what, I love you, and I think you love me too, and if people are going to talk about us then let them talk. But I'm sick of everyone else dictating what we can and can't do. I want to be with you, completely, and I don't want what happened to me when I was nineteen to stop that. I want to lose my virginity, properly this time, and I want to lose it to you."

She was bright red, obviously embarrassed by what she was saying, but there was a conviction in her voice that I hadn't heard before. I spoke, carefully, not sure how to explain what I wanted to without upsetting her. "I do love you, but I want our first time, your first time, I want it to be special. I want it to be about love, not making a point."

"The only point" Lorraine continued, "that I'm trying to make, is how much you mean to me, and how much I love you."

We looked at each other for a second and then I felt myself pulling her towards me, kissing her again, with a passion I didn't even know it was possible to feel. We fell backwards, a messy tangle of limbs, with me landing on her chest as we went.

"Ouch" I heard a small whimper from beneath me and remembered that her chest was still covered in second degree burns. I stopped for a second. "Sweetheart I don't want your burns to stop us, but we can only do this if you promise me that if it hurts too much you'll tell me. I will be as gentle as I can but I don't want to risk doing more damage to you so if you can't guarantee..."

"I promise" she interrupted, kissing me again, shutting me up completely. "And anyway if it's okay with you I'd like... to be on top for a bit?"

I nodded understanding why immediately. "Of course beautiful."

She rolled on top of me and we returned to kissing. I felt her fingers start to unbutton my shirt, shaking as they did it, and then stopped her again.

"Lorri look at me for a moment."

She did.

"Sweetheart I know that you wanted to be in control and I understand why, but babe you're shaking so much you can't even undo my shirt. I know this is terrifying for you. I mean it's terrifying for me so I can't even imagine how much worse it is for you; but you said you wanted this to be about our love, and that you didn't want it to be about proving a point or dictated at all by the past. Then please sweetheart, if you're not ready for this yet then I want us to stop. I don't want you to regret this because you needed to wait a little bit longer but you thought you'd gone too far through with it to do that. I'm not her babe. You can stop this at any time you want to."

I saw big wet tears start to fall down her cheeks and watched her carefully nod her head. "Please... please can we stop."

"Of course we can." I held her in my arms for a few minutes, rocking her slightly as though she were a small child. "I know it's only like lunchtime but you want to get snuggled up in bed and watch a film or something."

"Yeah, yeah that'd be nice." She said softly.

"Okay I'll grab us both something comfier to wear..."

"No"

I looked at her confused. "You don't want to get changed?"

"No I do I just..." she didn't finish her sentence. Instead she leant forwards and started unbuttoning my shirt. Miraculously now there was no intention behind it she managed to do it in seconds. Well I thought there was no intention behind it... but then what was she doing? I decided to let it play through and allowed her to strip me down to just underwear and then watched as she kicked off her heels and pulled her dress over her head.

"Stand up"

I did as I was told and stood up. She moved round to be in front of me and then leant behind me, unhooking the catch on my bra, pulling it off. Next she slid my pants over my hips to the floor. Silently I did the same back to her, first taking off her bra and then doing the same with her pants. I looked at her carefully, watching her blush as she thought about the fact I'd now seen her. Properly this time.

"You're perfect."

She shook her head "No I'm not, but you are."

We kissed, with less force than before but with no less emotion. I felt her hands drift to my hips and slid my arms around her back.

Lorraine

I moved my kisses to the side of her neck, sucking softly on her pulse point, pleased when I moved to see that I'd left a mark. I continued down her, kissing her shoulder blade, the top of her chest, between her breasts. And then slowly I moved my right hand to cup one, running my fingers over her nipple, watching it react to my touch.

I slowly bent lower, my kisses trailing the whole way down her middle to just below her pelvic bone. I felt her tense but I knew Nikki well enough to know that if she wanted me to stop she'd stop me.

I moved further down, kissing lower and lower until I reached her opening and looked up at her. I could see she was scared, probably just as scared as I was. Up until now she'd been playing it all pretty cool. I mean there were odd moments when she admitted she was scared about all this, and I'd occasionally seen hints of panic in her eyes, but as a whole she'd dealt with everything pretty calmly. But now she was seriously freaking out. And she also looked embarrassed, shy even. "It's okay, I love you" I whispered.

And I moved lower still, my lips meeting her clit and feeling her whole body shake at the touch. I kissed her and then stood up again, leading her slowly backwards onto the bed. When she was flat on her back I slid between her legs and moved back to my previous position. My lips slowly explored her, and then I carefully let my tongue do the same. I knew that if I wanted to get her to climax then I probably should stick with her clit, but it wasn't just about the finish. It was about learning about her body, what to do, what she liked. I continued kissing and running my tongue over her for a little bit longer, enjoying her squirming, enjoying watching her become wetter as I played. I was pleased that she was just lying patiently, obviously aware that I was exploring and happy to allow me to do so.

Then moving back to her clit I decided to try something different and carefully began sucking on her. I heard her let out a moan from further up the bed and had to suppress a grin. Well that certainly worked. I continued sucking, occasionally taking a break to kiss the whole way down to her opening and then back up again, before carefully pausing with two of my fingers at her entrance. Gently I pushed inside, thankful that after some time playing she was lubricated enough that there wasn't much resistance.

I heard her moan again as I began working my fingers in and out of her, adding a third once I was sure it wouldn't hurt her. At the same time I continued softly sucking on her clit,

"Yes, right, there." I heard her moan out; and as I pushed my fingers in even further and clamped my mouth tightly around her clit I finally felt her go over the edge, continuing what I was doing for long enough to let her ride out her climax.

"You, are, amazing" Nikki said, pulling me up the bed to kiss me. I kissed her back for a moment before sliding back down her body to clean her up a little with my tongue. A few more moans later and once I was satisfied I was done I went back next to her and placed a kiss onto her lips.

She kissed back and then looked down at where I'd been laying. "Oh look you enjoyed yourself too" she teased, and I realised that where I'd been I'd managed to leave a wet patch on my duvet.

"Oh..." I blushed, not really sure what to say, just feeling hugely embarrassed by my reaction.

"I guess that means it's my turn then" she said, before flipping me onto my back. Like me she started at the top, playing only for a few seconds with my breasts before realising there was no way she could do it without hurting me at the moment and instead continuing down my body. I watched as she carefully began touching me with her fingers, knowing I'd probably need a little more time to get used to her touch than she had with me.

"Just let me know if you need me to stop yeah?"

"Yeah" I replied, touched again by how amazing she was being to me.

I saw her playing about with my hair and then stop. She'd seen my scar. Gentle fingers ran over it, moving my hair out of the way so that she could get a better view. "Does it hurt?"

"Not anymore."

She settled herself between my legs and kissed my scar first, before carefully parting me so that she could get to me, a harder task than I'd had with her.

"I'm sorry, is the hair getting in the way" I felt my face flushing again.

"No it's fine beautiful, I'm guessing..."

"Yeah to cover my scar" I finished for her.

She nodded to show that she'd heard and then before I had a chance to worry about it anymore I could feel her tongue on me. Like I had with her she slowly explored me, working out what I liked. After a few minutes I felt her push a finger to my entrance, slowly trying to enter into me. Except no matter how much lubrication she'd made for herself, my entire body tensed when I realised what she was going to do and I tightened so much that there was no way she was getting anywhere.

"Sorry... I'm trying to relax, but..."

"Shhhh it's fine." She moved her fingers away, obviously deciding to fight that battle another time. I may be ready for us to be intimate in some ways, but there were other things I just wasn't ready for quite yet. So instead she went back to just using her tongue. She moved to my entrance and I waited, expecting her to just play around it like I had with her. Except the next moment I felt her tongue push its way inside me, and felt myself moan out. Her fingers found their way to my clit and while her tongue pushed in and out, swirling around inside me, her fingers rubbed against my sensitive nub, pushing me closer and closer to the edge until after over half an hour of her playing with me...

I heard myself scream out as the most incredible feeling swept across my body. I grabbed hold of the bed sheets as I rode it out before laying, panting and out of breath, on the bed above where she was laying. When sure I was done she moved up next to me, before blushing as she asked. "So... I was okay then?"

"You were more than okay" then I remembered what had happened before. "Sorry I... tensed up a bit. I didn't mean to I just..."

"Shhhh" she put her fingers to her lips. I could taste me on them. "Babe it's okay, I found a way around it and at least that means we still have something new to do next time. That's if you want a next time?" Suddenly she was the one that was nervous and insecure.

"Of course I do, if you want one. I mean I know my last... review... wasn't good. So I understand if I was shit and you don't want us to again."

"Shut up you were perfect" I relaxed into the kiss I received with this comment, and then shuffled to the side, pulling the duvet covers over us and snuggling into her.

"I can see what you meant now when you said about not wanting to get into pajamas."

I looked up at her and grinned slightly. "Actually I was just going to suggest that we lay naked together and held each other for a bit, but this worked too."