Thank you so much to anyone out there who is reading this story. I hope you enjoy some more of the Edward and Bella interactions

Huge thanks go to Emmauk26, Kaylie Kay and Twilight-Vamp-Sis who always take the time to leave me a review. It is really nice to know that you are still reading

Chapter 14

BPOV – Friendship?

Friendship with Edward was easy.

And hard.

We spent time together as friends do. We went out within our group and enjoyed the company of everyone. When I decided that it was about time for me to start looking for a job seriously it was Edward who helped me with my resume and the one who encouraged me to go for any little position that could possibly get me my dream career. He was the perfect friend; attentive, helpful, considerate and way too aware of the line I had drawn between us, the one he never crossed. He gave me what I asked for and I couldn't fault him in anyway.

Except that the ache did not disappear; the awareness did not suddenly become less of a concern and it was getting harder to ignore that I was feeling way more for him than I had ever imagined possible. It had become very apparent that in becoming his friend I had opened myself up to a more intimate knowledge of him and there was not a single thing that I did not like about him. If there was such a thing as a perfect man, he was it and any woman would be lucky to have him. I wished I could relax enough with him to demonstrate how much I cared.

But I couldn't.

It wasn't until I got to Forks to celebrate his sister's birthday and have a week long break in his family home that I allowed myself to consider the ramifications of our friendship. I struggled with the visual reminders of Peter in the house along with the very real presence of Edward. The two always seemed to be in bitter conflict in my head and sometimes it was hard to keep up the improvements that I had made over the course of the previous few weeks. There was no pressure from Edward of course; he kept up his role as friend but it didn't escape my attention that there were times, like at his sisters party where other women's advances made me seeth or question myself, that I reacted to him in ways that were more than just as a good friend.

I never let him see how he affected me.

Not until Alice's flippant reminder that his time was limited with us and that eventually he would have to return to Paris. The thought of him leaving left me feeling empty. I couldn't help but react to that, although I was hoping it would be unseen by the others. Edward's small touch under the table told me that he at least had recognised my discomfit.

Why didn't that surprise me?

And then there had been the meadow; one of the most beautiful places I had ever experienced and the one place where I completely let my guard down with Edward. Had he known that would happen? He had taken me there in response to my own melancholy and our subsequent discussion about how I was coping with Peter's memories. He did not push; just gave me the opportunity to enjoy an environment that was not only beautiful but one that held no memories, good or bad, for me. It was here that I was finally able to admit to myself, and then aloud to him, that I was glad he was staying; that he wouldn't be leaving to head back to Paris any time soon.

Reaching out to him had been easy for the duration of the time we stayed in that magical place.

Not so easy when we returned to the reality of his home and our friends.

The meadow had been two days ago and there had been no repeat of that comfortable time between us. We interacted as usual with our friends and family and I continued to learn about the man who was sending my senses reeling but beyond that, we were what we always were….friends.

Tonight we were going out as a group to a night club in Port Angeles. Edward, Alice, Jasper and Emmett left in the late afternoon because of a friend that they wanted to catch up with and one that Jasper was determined should meet Alice. I chose not to go so Rosalie stayed back with me and we had a very girly time getting ready for our night out before we left to join the others at the club. It was good to have that breathing space in all honesty. By the time we reached the club it seemed that the place was pumping and the house was packed; probably due to it being the only decent night club in the area. Rosalie and I scanned the room until we saw Jasper and Emmett sitting at a table and we made our way through the throng of bodies to get to them.

"Where's Alice and Edward?" I questioned as I sat down in the space Emmett made for me, looking around to find the missing two pieces of our group.

"Alice is chatting to the deejay about some music requests for the night," Jasper laughed lightly at his girlfriends need to be the organizer "and Edward is getting a round of the drinks from the bar."

His explanation complete, he returned his attention to the conversation that had been taking place as we'd walked in which revolved around his sister's escapades with a doting Jacob in tow. We all found it quite amusing that she had him so completely wrapped around her finger and that he was willing to do anything at all for her. This time in Forks had certainly cemented their friendship and Emmett was teasingly muttering that the Cullens and the Swans seemed to have a natural attraction to one another that went beyond just Alice and Jasper. It didn't escape my attention when he raised his eyebrows up at me as he spoke but I chose to ignore him because frankly it wasn't something I wanted to dwell on, even if he was right.

Rosalie and I were discussing Esme's exceptional hospitality when Alice returned to plop herself on Jasper's vacant lap. His arms were instantly around her and she settled herself against his chest with a serene smile on her face.

"All sorted." She stated with a devilish grin. "I made sure he understood we were in the mood for a dance and wanted some good music tonight."

"I'm sure you did Ali," Jasper responded with his usual doting air.

"It had to be done. I'm all in for a good night." She moved herself off Jasper's lap but didn't break contact as she slid into the place right next to him. "I am interested though, in who the glamour puss is that Edward is talking to at the bar right now." Alice nodded towards the bar but it was hard to see through the crowd. My heart took a swift nose dive. Edward with some glamorous woman made me kind of feel sick to my stomach. Jasper stood up so that he could get a better look and then sat back down groaning.

"Great. Just what he needs. That's Tanya and let me tell you that she might be good looking but she is far from a nice person."

"Well why doesn't he ignore her and head back here to us," Rosalie said with more impatience than was warranted, which made me look at her with curiosity.

"Oh our Tanya there doesn't just let someone go when she has her sights on them and she has had her sights on Edward for years. She knows Edward is too nice to outright embarrass her and she uses that to her advantage. I can assure you that Edward is not enjoying that little tete to tete over there. Not at all."

Emmett scoffed. "Edward needs to start being as ruthless with the woman as he is in business. If Tanya was a competitor he would have her out of there in no time, regardless of her entreaties."

"He's a gentleman," My soft voice surprised even me and everyone turned to stare. I shrugged. "He wouldn't want to hurt her feelings and he hasn't got it in him to be rude to a woman."

"Exactly," Jasper conceded "and Tanya is even harder because she is a friend of the family and it would make things difficult. Actually you met her parents the other night at Camille's party, along with her sister Irina. I guess Tanya wasn't available to help Camille celebrate her birthday."

"So basically our Edward needs saving?" Alice piped up and Jasper nodded his agreement. "Well off you go then. Go help your brother."

The look of horror on Jasper's face was priceless and I couldn't help but giggle. Rosalie and Alice did the same.

"Um…..no. I don't want to draw Tanya's attention away from Edward because that would be detrimental to my health."

"What do you mean?" Rosalie was starting to get even more narky. What was her problem?

"Edward is the one she wants more than anything but let's just say if she can't get one Cullen brother she would be more than happy to settle for the other. I don't want to spend all night sidestepping her. I'm here to enjoy myself."

Alice no longer thought the situation was amusing. "She'd have to get past me first and let me tell you that I have no need to be polite to the girl. In fact I could…"

"Oh for goodness sakes I will go get him." I stood up from the table quickly before anyone could disagree and pushed my way through the crowd. I was at an angle from them when I was finally close enough to eavesdrop and it was very apparent that Edward was uncomfortable. That made me feel so much better about the beauty standing in front of him. She might be gorgeous but he didn't want her. The tightness in my chest was alleviated a little.

"What's your hurry Eddie? I haven't seen you in over a year and you can't spare me a few more minutes?"

"My friends are waiting Tanya. I need to get back to them with their drinks." Edward sounded resigned and it made me annoyed that she couldn't just let him go without the fuss like he obviously wanted her to.

"Fine. Why don't I join you and your friends then?" The words were not so bad but when she stepped closer to him and started to run her fingertips up and down his arm I wanted to run in there and snatch her hand away from him. Instead I stood frozen and waited for his reaction, which was for him to tighten his hold on the tray of drinks he was holding so that his fists were clenched . He spoke in a very controlled voice.

"Tanya. I actually have a girlfriend now so could you please stop touching me like that."

"Oh come on Eddie, we both know that you don't have a girlfriend because, let's face it, you're not the relationship kind of a guy."

I was already moving as Edward began to retaliate to her accusation. "Firstly, it's Edward Tanya, not Eddie and secondly you're wrong. I am capable of….."

His words halted and for a brief second his eyes lit up when he saw my approach. Then his face went a horrible ashen color as he glanced from me to Tanya.

Oh no Edward. You've got nothing to worry about.

"Hi babe," I sidled up and situated myself into his side so I could place my arm around his waist and reach out to lightly rest my lips against his shirt clad shoulder in a pseudo kiss. He smelled remarkably good. Edward tensed a little in surprise but before I had a chance to say anything he had juggled the tray against himself so that he had one free arm which found its way around my shoulder. His face held so much thankfulness and admiration as he leant down to kiss my forehead that I almost forgot that we were acting for the girl in front of us. The clearing of her throat reminded me very quickly and I let my eyes move from Edward's face to look at her straight on.

"And you are?" The anger at my disruption was very evident in her voice.

"Oh sorry, how rude of me. I didn't mean to interrupt your discussion with a friend Edward. Emmett was getting antsy for his drink." I smiled up at Edward warmly and he gave me a huge grin in return. My heart fluttered a little. This position was all too comfortable and exciting. I liked the feel of his arm around me and the way he was looking at me as if I was the only girl in the world.

I held out my hand to Tanya. "I'm Bella. Edward's girlfriend. Pleased to meet you."

She looked down at my offered hand and raised an eyebrow in scorn so I let it drop again but kept my eyes trained on her face so that she knew I wasn't intimidated by her rudeness.

"Tanya…" Edward's warning was not in any way friendly now and he gripped my shoulder in a sign of support.

She looked at me with contempt and directed her words at Edward. "You don't actually want me to believe that this little nothing is your girlfriend, do you? You could have anyone you want Edward. Settling for less than nothing is against your nature."

Edward's face was taking on a life of its own as the anger took over. I would have made my own response to her insult if I hadn't been so worried that he was about to blow a gasket and definitely lash out at Tanya for what she was saying. Jasper had suggested that she was a family friend and it wasn't worth the angst of dealing with the politics of it just because someone I didn't care about had insulted me. My right hand came up and placed itself against Edward's chest and I could feel the thundering of his heart. I stretched up to whisper in his ear and felt his breathing accelerate even more. I didn't have time to question the reasoning behind that.

"She's not worth it. I came to give you an excuse to get away from her. Use it."

Edward struggled. I could see every emotion as it flitted across his face. He was angry and embarrassed and I was asking him not to follow through on what he wanted to do, which was berate her for her attack on me. His eyes searched mine to ensure I really wanted him to walk away and then he brought his hand up to graze his thumb from my earlobe down to my chin. My whole body reacted to his light touch and again I had to remember where I was; that I was not in some alternate universe which only encased myself and Edward. He took a deep breath and faced back to Tanya who was seething at the intimacy he had just displayed.

"On that note Bella and I are going to return to our friends Tanya and I hope you understand that after the way you just insulted my girlfriend, you are not welcome." His arm came away from my shoulder and I instantly felt bereft but he moved his free hand down and took my hand into his before moving away from a gobsmacked Tanya. "And just so it is completely clear, Bella is way out of your league; there's absolutely no comparison."

Edward was still angry as we approached the table where the others were giving us a standing ovation.

"So the prodigal son returns." Emmett teased as the two of us took our seats. "From all reports that should not have been so easy. I take it that Tanya didn't enjoy the competition?"

"I don't think she considered me competition at all actually." My words were flippant but there was a small ache when I thought about how right she was; Edward could do so much better than a girl like me, a girl who was somewhat broken and not able to give him what he deserved. "In fact she thought that me as Edward's girlfriend was a bit of a joke."

"Girlfriend?" Alice asked with interest and I was about to explain how I'd backed up Edward's claim that he was a taken man by pretending to be his girlfriend when Edward spoke with quiet determination.

"Yeah, well Tanya doesn't know squat and what she said was way off the mark. You shouldn't have been exposed to her lies and insults and all I can say is I'm sorry." Edward was way too worked up and I placed my hand on his knee to let him know that it was alright. "I'm so angry right now that I feel like going back over there and giving her a piece of my mind."

"So much for his inability to be rude to a woman," Emmett scoffed. As usual I ignored him.

"Easy there Mr Protective. She means nothing to me so there's nothing to worry about. Geez, I'd hate to see what you would have done to her if she had insulted a girl you were actually in love with."

Emmett spluttered as he choked on his drink and coughed harshly as he received death stares from both Rosalie and Edward. I frowned at this interaction between the three of them and turned to Jasper to see what he made of their strange behavior. His eyes were very deliberately looking down into his lap and I was getting no answers from him. Only Alice was looking at me directly and she had a small smirk on her face as if she had suddenly realized something. It was all very strange and just added to my discomfit of knowing how willingly I had let myself fall into a role that was all lies.

"Okay. I get it. A little over reaction on my part, but she just gets under my skin. Let's forget about it and get on with the good night we intended." Edward's nervousness did not make sense to me but I was happy to follow his instructions. He lifted his glass and raised it onto the circle. "Here's to good friends and a fun night."

All our glasses clinked together and the night seemed to get back on track with conversation beginning again on something other than Tanya and her rudeness. When the others were otherwise busy Edward leant into me so that his breath tickled my ear. Warmth seeped through me and I held my breath.

"Thanks for what you did Bella. Thanks for backing me up with the whole girlfriend bit."

All too soon he moved his mouth away from my ear and I struggled to be coherent when I told him 'anytime'. We smiled at one another and rejoined the discussion being held around us. I wasn't completely in the moment though because I was coming to the understanding that the way I felt when Edward was this close; so that his thigh pressed against mine and his arm every now and again brushed against me, was not normal for a girl who didn't want anything from him. My emotions were all over the place and the underlying thrumming of life within the bar combined with the intoxicating presence next to me was making my head spin.

Emmett returning from his turn at the bar, to hand me the non alcoholic concoction he thought I should try, made me focus on the rest of the table more fully. Jasper and I were the designated drivers for tonight since the trip from Port Angeles to Forks was a little far for a taxi fare but I was happy with my choice given the way my sober head was buzzing with confusion without the complication of alcohol.

"Edward you might like to show your girlfriend a little more attention since you are being watched like a hawk by one Tanya." Emmett taunted and winked at the two of us in amusement. "Put your arm around her at least."

"I'm not going to make Bella feel uncomfortable just to prove a point to Tanya. She can think what she wants."

My words came out with very little thought. "It doesn't worry me Edward. What's an arm slung around the shoulders between friends huh? I'd prefer that than having her nasty self over here trying to get into your pants."

Everyone let out a guffaw and I continued.

"It's not like Emmett is suggesting we make out."

"I could if you wanted me too." Emmett threw back and Rosalie smacked him across the back of his head with a little too much oomph. My lips turned up in a grin and I looked at Edward expecting him to have his own go at Emmett but instead found him staring at my lips intently and his adams apple moving up and down as he swallowed. I felt my cheeks redden and Edward shook himself out of whatever thoughts he was lost in, when he realized I was watching him, and turned nonchalantly to Emmett to respond.

"I think we'll stick with the arm around the shoulder for now Emmett but thanks for the offer."

The next fifteen minutes were spent with me trying to ignore the feel of Edward's arm sitting comfortably across my shoulders so that I fit perfectly into the crook of his arm, and the exhilarating feeling of him not just resting his hand on my arm but combing his long fingers through the hair at the nape of my neck at inconsistent intervals. He didn't falter with the conversation he was having with the others so I could only imagine he didn't realize that he was even doing it.

I didn't want him to stop.

And I desperately needed him to.

"I need to visit the ladies," I spoke to no one in particular but Alice was instantly up offering to come with me, so I moved reluctantly from under Edward's hold and breathed a sigh of relief. When I looked at Edward he merely smiled and kept up his banter with Jasper and Emmett.

As we walked Alice weaved her arm with mine and leant in close so that I could hear her above the noise of the club.

"Do you mind telling me what's going on with you and Edward, dear sister because it seems I'm the only one in the dark and it's not a nice place for me to be."

"Don't know what you're talking about Ali. I'm only helping him out of a jam. There's nothing more to it."

"Yeah, like I'm going to believe that. I'm not only talking about tonight either. You two have some kind of connection that goes beyond this friendship you're both trying to enforce. He looks at you as if he wants to consume you in every way and you look like you are constantly struggling with being close to him."

"Oh please Alice, don't you think you're being rather melodramatic? And besides if there was something going on you'd be the first to know because it's your thing to know what's going to happen before it actually does."

"Yeah well it seems I've been a bit off my game since I've been concentrating so hard on helping Jasper get where he wants to be. I can tell you that alarm bells are well and truly ringing now though and you need to come clean with me."

Alice suddenly stopped and then began moving again. "Actually hold onto that thought because right now we have incoming and this could get nasty."

I followed her scowling stare over to see a very annoyed looking Tanya heading towards us, as if she was going to follow us into the bathroom. Alice's eyes widened as she glanced the other way and I saw that Tanya was about to be very neatly cut off from her attempt as a living looking Edward stepped in front of her. Alice quickly pulled me into an alcove so that we could no longer see the altercation but could still hear it.

"Going somewhere?" Edward questioned with ill disguised sarcasm.

"To the bathroom if that is okay with you." Tanya answered with her own sarcasm.

"Actually it's not. Think it might be worth your while to wait for a little while."

"You're kidding right? Do not tell me you feel the need to protect your so called plain as Jane girlfriend from little old me Edward. Isn't she capable of speaking for herself?"

"You really have no idea Tanya. Bella is far from plain. In fact I think everything about her is beautiful and she is more than capable of looking after herself, but this time I'm choosing for her not to have to deal with your insults when she's trying to have a good night."

"Oh come on Edward. You can drop the charade. This protective crap is just making you look like an idiot."

"Well an idiot I am then because I would do absolutely anything to protect the girl who just walked in there Tanya and I'm not going to let you hurt her because you've got your nose out of joint. She means too much to me."

Alice was gripping onto my arm so tightly that it was beginning to hurt and her eyes were like saucers when she looked at me.

"Oh my god how can you possibly stand there and tell me nothing is going on." She whispered to me. "The guy would take a bullet for you."

"And the guy is only acting to get rid of a nuisance," I hissed back, trying to find the conviction I needed. "And have you forgotten Peter Alice? Do you think I'm going to forget him as well?"

Her eyes dropped in apology and she squeezed my arm once more in sympathy.

"I'm sorry sis. It's just the two of you seem so right and…."

"Anything, you say?" Tanya's calculating voice made us bring our attention back to the conversation playing out just beyond our view. Edward didn't speak so I could only assume that he nodded.

"Well how about we make a deal. I'll leave your precious Bella alone if you prove you don't find me attractive by kissing me. If you don't realize that you've made a mistake with little Miss Average in there after the kiss, I'll leave the two of you alone. No strings attached. I only want you to see what you've been missing out on all these years."

My hand went to my mouth in a defensive motion and Alice grimaced.

"He wouldn't," She hissed at me but my mouth was dry and I couldn't answer. There was no reason for him not to do it; she would be off his back if he did this one thing and it wasn't like he would be betraying a real girlfriend; we weren't really in a relationship.

But my brain was screaming for him not to succumb, not to make me imagine his lips against someone elses. Not to show her that I really meant nothing to him.

His silence was worrying and made me think he was considering that it might all be worth it. Then he answered and the disgust in his voice spoke volumes.

"You've just reinforced why I've never wanted to be with you Tanya. Why would I want to be with someone who acts like a school girl instead of a woman and needs to make such contrived attempts to be with someone even after they've made it quite clear that they only like her as a friend. I'm kind of disgusted right now."

"What's happened to you Edward. You've never treated me like this before and you've never been so keen to accept mediocre."

"You've never quite overstepped the mark in the same way before Tanya and as for what has happened to me….nothing…you've never bothered to look beyond what you see in front of you. You have no idea what makes me tick otherwise you'd never have made such a ludicrous suggestion. I would never, ever kiss one woman while I was in love with another and I don't need to kiss you when I already know that one touch from Bella would eclipse anything you had to offer. Have I made it clear enough for you? I am not interested and never will be."

Alice pulled at me and guided me away from the verbal confrontation that had left me reeling.

"I think we've heard enough. Come on, before he thinks we've been gone to long and sends in reinforcements."

I followed her mutely, absolutely stunned with what I had heard go down between Tanya and Edward. It amazed me that someone would be that desperate for attention that they would ask someone else to cheat just to make a point.

And then I became livid.

I may not be Edward's girlfriend but she did not know that and what she had suggested was plain wrong.

I may not be the most beautiful girl in the world but I was a decent person who would never dream of doing that to another girl. Not everything was about how perfectly good looking you were.

Who the hell did she think she was to insult me like that and at the same time treat Edward so badly? Like he had said to her, she didn't even know him and that made me angrier considering she had apparently been around him for years.

Alice didn't speak a word, merely staring at me as I angrily touched up the small amount of mascara and lip gloss I had put on earlier. It was as if she knew that I was about to crack and she was just waiting for the moment. I flung the gloss back into my bag and then faced her with a determined shift to my shoulders.

"Ready?"

She gave me an evil grin. "Of course"

And the two of us marched out of the bathroom in a manner that showed we meant business.

I almost halted when I noticed Edward leaning against the wall as if he didn't have a care in the world and was only patiently waiting, rather than playing a bodyguard role. He was gorgeous and I tried extremely hard to ignore my minds plea to forget the hussy and solely think about how Edward was there for me; how the jeans fit him perfectly and his crossed arms over his chest highlighted how fit and trim he was, how his hair was in its normal disarray as he tilted his head at an angle to greet us silently with the crooked smile that always did funny things to my heart.

I ignored the plea.

Tanya was not in his immediate vicinity but that only served to spur me back on so that I almost walked straight past Edward in my one tracked attempt to have it out with the girl who thought I was worth nothing and treated Edward like a piece of meat.

Edward gently grabbed my arm as I passed and I saw him give Alice a meaningful look. "Is everything alright?" Concern laced Edward's question and I rounded on him. All the pent up emotions of dealing with Peter's death, all the confusion of what I felt for Edward, all the words Tanya had said that I knew deep down were true because I could never be good enough or pretty enough for someone as perfect as Edward came to the fore.

"No it is not," I spoke through clenched teeth and Edward's concern turned into surprise at my vehemence.

"Okay?" Edward hadn't relinquished his hold on me and somehow it was already having a calming effect that I didn't want right now.

"We heard Tanya speaking to you Edward." Alice explained as I stood there willing him to let me go and not get into this with me. "And can I just say that I hope Jasper has that same stance on sticking up for the people he cares about because frankly I found that kind of hot."

"Oh." The small crease between his eyebrows deepened but after that one word he remained silent. Alice chose that moment to let us know that she was leaving us to sort this out ourselves and I hardly noticed her moving away because I was so caught up in my own indignation and the look of sorrow in Edward's eyes, that nothing else meant much to me.

I broke my own silence. "Yes we heard everything and I am going over there to give her a piece of my mind."

"Understandable but I'm wondering if it's worth it?"

"It would make me feel better."

"Really?" I could see from the look on his face that he knew me better than that. He knew that right now I was angry but later I would be upset with myself for giving into my emotions.

"I heard her tell you I'm a plain Jane."

"Then you must have also heard me tell her that you are the most beautiful woman I know."

The coil of tension that was at breaking point within me loosened a little.

"She thinks I can't look after myself."

"And we both know that is not the truth." His thumb was now moving backwards and forwards over my wrist as he looked me straight in the eye. I doggedly kept my anger simmering to counteract the warmth and rightness of what he was doing.

"She called you an idiot." I said with harsh indignation and his lips lifted slightly to show he was amused by the turn around in protectiveness.

"I've been called worse."

"She said I was nothing."

"And that's far from true."

I was becoming deflated under his calm assurances and my need to go speak to Tanya was waning. Then an image of Edward kissing the perfect beauty of Tanya invaded my mind and the simmer became a roaring inferno again.

"She's a vile human being and I don't care how pretty she is, she had no right to…..to…."

Edward was watching me intently and this time had no response.

"She doesn't even know the kind of person you are Edward. She asked you to kiss her. Even though you told her you were taken, she was willing to make you cheat."

"And you heard my answer to that too Bella. You must know that I didn't want to kiss her; that I don't want to kiss anyone else."

My tirade was quickly quelled as I took in his words.

I don't want to kiss anyone else.

I tried to pretend I didn't know what he meant but it didn't work. He was too close. He was too perfect and had just stuck up for me in every way possible. I wasn't going to think about it anymore. The coil loosened entirely and a rush of adrenaline coursed through me.

"I'm so sorry Edward." I breathed as I took a step closer.

"What on earth for?"

"For this."

My hands found their way up to grasp his shoulders. He was as still as a statue as I pulled his head down so that I could reach his lips with mine. When my mouth finally got to its destination Edward hesitatingly placed his hands on my hips as if the movement might frighten me and stop what was happening between us.

Beyond the first touch, that sent shockwaves up and down my body, there was the gentle lingering touch of the lips as I explored the outline of his mouth. Every one of my senses was on high alert; taste and texture combined to make me want more…..always more and when I took his bottom lip into mine he immediately opened up to me to give me exactly what I was silently asking for.

Bliss…..complete bliss.

It seemed an eternity of soft caresses using only our mouths before Edward's breath caught and a change came over him so that he was no longer letting me have control of the kiss. Up until that moment he had not touched me anywhere but at my hips but now one hand slipped around my waist and I could feel him tugging at me, trying to get our bodies closer while the other wound its way through my hair. My own hand moved to the back of his head and I returned the passion that had so suddenly ignited between us with such force. I lost myself completely in his nearness and his kiss. There was no thought, only feeling and it was like nothing I had ever known before.

A discrete cough from behind me snapped me back to reality and as I froze, Edward tensed waiting for me to withdraw from him. I moved my face a little away so that I could look into his eyes. They were smouldering but there was a touch of panic there as well that made my heart break. His fingers were still entangled in my hair and I had the sudden need to escape.

"Please don't do it," Edward whispered and his breath fanned my face as his forehead fell to rest against mine. "Please don't regret it Bella. Don't kiss me like that and then walk away as if it was wrong."

My words were wrenched from my mouth and I couldn't look at him anymore. "I can't….I'm sorry….I…Oh god….."

The last thing I noticed were his slumped shoulders and hurt expression as I did exactly what he had just asked me not to.

I walked away feeling like the worst person in the world.

Besides complete strangers, only three people had witnessed the kiss that was still eliciting a tingly feeling on my lips; Emmett, Rosalie and Tanya.

Emmett's proclamation that my willingness to help Edward out of a tight spot was admirable only made me glare at him, although his next words relating to Tanya leaving when she saw the kiss made me feel a little better that I had not embarrassed Edward with at least one thing.

I ignored Emmett's evident delight in seeing Edward and I kiss and spoke solely to my sister who was staring at me with her usual knowing look.

"I need to go home now." I was starting to shake in the aftermath of what I had just done and Rosalie duly noticed it.

"Fine. I can't drive but I'll keep you company."

I didn't bother to argue, only wanting to get out before Edward returned and I had to face his pleading eyes and the knowledge that I'd hurt him. The two of us quickly left with Rosalie giving Emmett instructions to let Alice and Jasper, who were currently dancing, know that I wasn't feeling well and we'd gone home.

Once we were on the road I thanked my lucky stars that it was Rosalie with me rather than Alice. I was not in the mood for fifty questions that I had no answers for. We were half an hour into the drive before Rosalie finally spoke.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"He's going to hate me." was the first thing that came to mind.

"I very much doubt that."

"I kissed him Rose. I couldn't help it."

"I saw that Bella and it was definitely not so much a 'friend kiss' but more a 'I want you body and soul kiss'. It was one hell of a kiss."

"Did you have to point that out?"

"Probably not but I wanted you to see how it looked from the outside."

"It should never have happened."

"Well I think it was only a matter of time before it did really."

Her words were doing nothing to ease my guilt and I told her so. She simply shrugged her shoulders at me.

"I can't help it if the truth isn't something you want to hear Bella. At some point you're going to have to stop denying that you feel more for him than what you feel you should."

I glared at her and she stared right back as if to challenge me to argue. I huffed and refused to take her on, concentrating more fully on the road and willing us to get there as quickly as possible.

The house was silent when we got back and I was thankful that I wouldn't have to face Esme or Carlisle. Rosalie and I climbed the stairs to make our way to the guest rooms where we were residing. I was in no mood to talk anymore and just wanted to curl up on my bed and pretend that nothing out of the ordinary had happened tonight; that I hadn't selfishly let my feelings for Edward come forth when we couldn't follow through on them. I hated myself for doing that to him. He was the last person I would readily hurt.

"You're going to have to sort this out in the morning Bella. You can't leave things like this. It's bad enough that you ran away the way you did."

I was about to protest when Rosalie put her hand up to stop me.

"I understand why you did and honestly I think Edward will probably understand too because he is either ridiculously patient with you or purely masochistic, but you still need to talk to him. It's only fair."

She followed up her speech with a curt goodnight and left me to my own devices.

Sleep didn't come easily as I kept my ears open for the sound of the other car getting home and I kept replaying in my mind the way Edward had held me tentatively and then with more force as he kissed me.

Two apologies were whispered into the night before I finally fell into a restless sleep.

The first to Peter and the second to Edward. I hoped that at least one of them was heard.

Strangely enough I slept in; maybe my way of putting off the inevitable confrontation with Edward. When I finally made my way into the kitchen I swear all conversation ceased and the three habitants of Alice, Emmett and Rosalie stared at me guiltily. As I smiled unsurely at them Esme bustled into the kitchen with her usual cheerful greeting, asking me if I had slept well and then proceeding to ask me what she could get me for breakfast. My stomach rumbled at the offer but I was pretty sure I wouldn't be able to eat anything until I had spoken to Edward.

"Actually I wanted to talk to Edward about something first, if that's okay?"

"Oh I am sorry sweetheart, Edward left this morning to get back to New York. I thought he went up to let you know before they left." Esme's face was creased in confusion and I tried valiantly not to allow her to see how much her words had impacted on me. "I guess he didn't want to wake you."

Jacob and Camille chose that moment to waltz into the kitchen and Esme was concentrating on their needs as she pulled things out of the fridge. I took the opportunity to look at my sisters and Emmett to get some answers.

"Edward got a phonecall while we were at the club last night." Alice was the one to explain. "There was an emergency at work and he was asked to return as soon as possible. Jasper had driven him to Seattle to get a flight out. They left hours ago."

All I could do was nod my head. Emmett came over to give me a bear hug and whispered. "He really did go up to speak to you. This wasn't about you. Just unfortunate timing."

All I could think about was that Edward was gone.

I had kissed him and run and now he had left in return.

I couldn't make it up to him. I wouldn't be able to tell him what I had figured out in the middle of the night.

That I couldn't get Edward's kiss out of my head even though along with it came the guilt and turmoil that had been shadowing me for months.

And there in lied the problem because…..

Peter's many kisses had been comfort and devotion.

And Edward's one kiss had been ….everything.

How could I be willing to accept what that actually meant in reality when I knew deep down it was all too much, all too soon?

Maybe Edward's disappearance was a good thing after all.