THE NINTH FALL – Chapter 13 "This Is Who I Am."
This is it, I can feel it.
The end is here.
The Core radiates a low hum, and a steady vibration. The technology here looks futuristic, and very impressive, I can see why they didn't want the Humans to find this. The otherwise spotless floor is littered with a miasma of thin white tendrils, they spread like wildfire across the floor and up the walls. No doubt the source of the mimics is to blame, and assures me that this is the right way. The safety-absent paths suspend above a bright yellow substance, no doubt the energy that's being converted from the magma, as Flowey explained. Magical energy apparently, however that works. Its apparently been in standby ever since everyone left, enough that the underground still had power for the few people that stayed behind. Good thing too, there being power down here has saved my ass more then once.
We just came here after waking up, hardly even a room in. The elevator at the entrance was supposed to lead to New Home, but its destroyed on both ends, as was the precaution to Human back-trackers.
"I'll watch your back, just stay attentive from the front." Flowey sounds unusually determined, I think he's just really worried about me. "Will do." I respond.
As with most of the paths down underground, safety seems to be an afterthought, narrow paths that have lethal falls into the cores energy. I wonder how many Monsters died falling down stuff like this...
"Was there ever a problem with monsters dying from falling down these pits? Almost all the paths down here seem needlessly dangerous." I ask, trying to make small talk before the end, even though we've had this exact conversation before.
"Now isn't the time." He responds bluntly. Jeez, I nod my head and keep walking. Its fairly well lit in here, unlike most of the underground, which is a dark mess. There are no lights above us, but the energy stuff beneath us is really bright, and illuminates the path well enough with how cramped this place is.
The silence is unnerving. The steps of my shoes echo far into the distance, it almost makes me want to breath slower to try and stay as quiet as possible. The room stinks like a sterile hospital room, the scent of cleaning products almost. It feels like my nose hairs are being burned out...
The corridors are samey, and while there are forks in the path, they are blocked off by writhing white masses, leaving only one way ahead, one straight shot to a trap...
A turn, a turn, another turn.
Where are all the mimics? This place should be infested with them! I feel my heart beating out of my chest, expecting to get jumped by one any second.
"Flowey, have you seen anything at all?" I ask him quietly, wondering if he's similarly unnerved.
Silence.
"Flowey...?" I ask again, stopping in my tracks as I grit my teeth.
Silence.
"Asriel?" I ask through my teeth, taking off my backpack and looking into the flower pot, only seeing dirt.
Oh no... Is he...?
He's alright, he has nothing to do with this.
A voice echoes through my mind, but I'm prepared for it.
"Who are you and want do you want with me?" I ask to the room as I stare into the empty flower pot.
Come and see.
An uneasy moment to think, before I shoot up to my feet, leaving the backpack where it is on the ground. Back where I came from, there are mimics now. They stand still, staring into my soul. I light fire in my hands, prepared to fight them.
No purpose fighting, they are only here to show you the way.
"Like hell I'll listen to you!" I exclaim, as I pelt a fireball into the group, creating a messy white and red explosion, spreading white flesh all over the walls and floor, before I run forward, infernos still ready in my palms.
Why do I keep giving you the benefit of the doubt? Time after time, my faith is misplaced.
You like doing things the hard way, so I'll give you the hard way.
Mimics climb up the side of the pathway, seemingly out of the cores energy, and rush towards me as I run, but are easily dispatched by whips of fire, as I featherfoot over and around them, avoiding touching them at all cost. My heart rushes, knowing any second could be the end if I'm not careful. The moans of the mimics rising from the core drowns out the sounds of my running. Should I try to load and regroup with Asriel? I don't have enough time for the focus a load requires, that's not an option!
One after one, they get in my way, and are burned away like the garbage they are.
I'm starting to run out of breath... but I have to keep going! The path seems to go on forever, turn after turn, where is the end of this? I land from a jump and almost trip, able to regain my balance at the last second, this needs to end!
I'm not wondering for long, as I approach a large door, with intricate grooves that make it look like a fancy circuit board. I quickly feel around for a handle, as my lungs catch up with me. My legs feel like they are on fire, as I look behind me, seeing beasts approach slowly, giving me the time to open the door that I desperately need.
After some fiddling, the door gives, opening from both sides, I quickly run through the door, and I hear it gently close behind me. Finally, a chance to breath as I slink down the back of the door... My entire shirt is drenched in sweat, my skin slick as I take the small break. I feel light thuds on the other end of the door, they're trying to get in, but not all that much...
This... seems to be the center of the Core, there's a large console in the middle of the cramped room, displaying many screens. The temperature of the core is visible, along with dozens of other statistics and gauges, all of which are indecipherable to me. Behind the console, in the center of the room, is a for once, gated off... hole? At the bottom, is more of the strange substance magma stuff, but it seems more volatile, constantly raising and falling changing in colors from white to orange. Whats the purpose?
Hello again, child.
A black distortion appears over the pit, a ebony transparent mass, that seems to bug in and out of reality, just what am I dealing with? I grit my fists.
"I'M HERE, WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH ME?!" I shout at it, completely out of patience.
The voice gets louder.
Now, now... Don't get LOUD with me.
The voice echos in the small room, ringing in my ears.
This won't do. I need to speak to you, on my terms.
"What are you talking about? You're right there!" I say, seething with frustration, my fists still curled with magic. My gut says it won't work to just attack the distortion, so I hold back.
You need to come to my... home. Outside, in the halls.
The voice cracks multiple times, its not stable.
Come down here... Make. Haste. Or you won't get the chance to do it on your own.
The distortion falls slowly falls into the pit, fading away into the Core energy.
What?
"I'm not going down there!" I shout at the pit, but there's no response. "Damn it!" I shout, my head drenched in sweat, dripping down on my alight hand.
A loud noise behind me, I shoot my head towards the door, only to see mimics skulking their way into the room, flowing like living water through the entrance.
Shit...
I shoot a steady torrent of fire into the door, and while it downs the first of the beasts easily, two more climb over its corpse, and with every kill, two take its place, the doorway contains just a melted pile of flesh, but they just keep coming.
Eventually, they start to overwhelm me, putting me into desperation, as they start to attack me from different angles.
I need to go, I need to-
One of the beasts jumps at me, and while I strike it down with a quickly conjured energy spear, it was too close for comfort.
Damn it! I have to get out of here!
I wait for a lull in the action, then quickly turn around and jump in the core pit, with no hesitation. I'll take my luck with a death in the core then a injury from one of the beasts, worst case scenario, I can reset on death, and plan things out again with Flowey.
The fall feels longer then it should, and eventually leads to a distant feeling, as my vision cuts to black...
You wanted me? You're gonna get more then you can handle.
a feeling of distance
where am i?
its as if i've been shattered
into a million pieces
and reassembled
again
but eventually
i come to
An overwhelming sense of nausea, I'd double over if I could.
What...
What is this place?
I don't even feel myself. I can only hear my own thoughts.
All I can see is a black void, but the deep dark is occasionally interrupted by strange visions...
Strange, strange things...
Flashes of corridors from all around the underground.
Filled with children, not too unlike myself. Filled with monsters, many of the same, or the same with different attributes... A hall of mirrors.
So many striped shirts... So many skeletons... So many boss monsters... Its all the same, or is any of it?
Am I dead?
Is this heaven? Or hell? Purgatory?
Or something different?
I try to move around, but I still can't feel anything...
I keep watching the visions, allured by their oddities.
That's Frisk, isn't it? I'd not imagine her to look like that, but it makes sense on sight. She always had this infectious confidence, and I see that in this young child too. The same short hair, but this ones got a really blank stare, she used to look like that in conversation all the time... Wait... that means that's Toriel? She looks so young! Crap, that means I'm, or was wearing one of her old robes? I look down to check instinctively, but there's nothing... I try to panic, but it does no good. I return to watching the visions after settling down.
I don't know how I didn't recognize them at a first glance, but yeah, I can see her meet both Sans and Papyrus. They look the same, but dress a lot sloppier then the few times I met them. I see them interacting with Frisk, but its hard to focus... And the details keep changing, one second the skeletons will look or act completely different, be something I don't recognize at all. But then they're back to normal. Is that Snowdin? It looks so much nicer then what I went through... It looks so lively and cozy, not the frozen deathtrap I saw.
Eventually, the Frisks makes it to Waterfall, and meet up with a knight in armor that tries to kill her. This goes on for a while, she meets more of the locals... Is that even Frisk? Sometimes she looks like a he, or something in between. Its so strange... That's still Frisk, but its not the one I know... Oh! The knight in armor was Undyne! She looks so much younger... What a looker! Its so strange to watch, just like all the others Frisk meets, sometimes she, or he kills them, other times they run, other times they spare the monster...
That's Alphys not too long after, it makes sense that was her lab. She was always so messy... Mettaton too? And hes just as much a jerk as I expected... This is absurd, that can't have actually have happened, right? It feels like comedy sketches... Game shows, cooking shows, news reports, is this all a joke? The underground was a goddamn loony bin! ...Eventually she arrives at the same Core I'm in, and destroys Mettaton... Or doesn't? Or kinda does?
This concludes in new home. Where Frisk meets Asgore, and slaughters him? What is this? Flowey turning into a monster? Or a Boss Monster? Wow, he looked damn good as an adult, woah... Its boggling my mind... Whats going on?
Frisk makes it out, sometimes with all the monsters, sometimes with none of them... What in the hell? A glance of a disturbing sight, Frisk walking like a mad person... Eyes totally devoid, emotionless, but with a seething unsettling feeling... Like how a hunter stalks its prey. Flowey is there too, talking with them? Flowey eventually goes, into that long corridor dark corridor I know all too well, and is confronted by a shadowy figure, something that's a near constant in all of these visions, but... Eventually they start to fight. I can only catch glimpses, like blinking rapidly, or a stop motion play, and... Holy crap, thats Sans! Flowey wasn't kidding, he looks like a beast! Its a total onslaught of attacks, with so many Frisks brutally succumbing, some grizzly sights to behold... Did this happen? There's no way, Frisk and Sans were chummy as hell! Eventually a Frisk makes it through, landing a killing blow, only to murder Asgore in a single swipe of their dusty knife... It cuts off after that, there's some weird stuff, but I can't really make it out... Everything is so fuzzy, like an old memory...
This all either repeats, or doesn't, going beyond into New Providence. But sometimes the city looks different? Or isn't even a city? Other visions repeat back to the beginning, Flowey is there... Sometimes he isn't. Sometimes-
"Its overwhelming, isn't it?" A voice rings through my mind.
I try to speak out, but I can't, I can only listen. "You've been watching for... A very long time." I keep trying to get words out, but nothing, like my mouths been closed off with cement, or zippered shut... This is the voice isn't it? My mind starts to race, as I instinctively try to ready my magic, but its for naught, it doesn't work.
The voice sounds helpful, but foreboding at the same time "Quite the view all the same. I've spent a long time watching these converging timelines, quite the life your friend Frisk lived. Enough so that so many folds of reality want to have their way with them. I'm even in a few of them, they generally don't get me in the right light, but it is entertaining nonetheless... Oh, you're not used to this, here, let me bring you to a place more... Suited to you." The voice says, before everything around me changes abruptly.
I'm brought to a white... Room? I feel whole again, my body is here, although it seems fuzzy, like TV static. I can talk, and I can hear myself doing so, but not much else.
"Where are you!?" I call out, as I take in my surroundings.
Disrupting the white void is a collection of black symbols, and more keep being added by the moment. I try to read it, but I can't make any of it out. Where the hell is this?
That doesn't matter, I can see them now, their figure still a distortion, with a humanoid shape only barely visible underneath. I try to ready my magic, and I feel it ready! "You're gonna regret that!" I scream and rush him, my hands ablaze in anger as I rush silently through the white void, closing the gap!
The shadowy figure stays still. "You're right, I do regret that." And with that, an immediate feeling of pain, as I'm shot backwards, a feeling of tearing immediate as I grunt in discomfort, landing stomach first on the 'ground.'
I try to get up, but my hands don't seem to work. I realize and scream, the bastard tore my arms off!
"You son of a bitch! I-" I'm interrupted by a large weight placed on my back, my face forced into the coarse feeling ground. It feels uncomfortable, but even with my arms torn off, I feel no pain, is it adrenaline?
"I give you the benefit of the doubt yet again, and you still meet my low expectations of you. I'd hope you would have changed, or at least show a chance too, but Humans never change. Hah... You're very lucky I don't have as easy a time killing as you do." They finish their tirade with malice. "Get the hell off of me!" I just need to- "You're not in the position to be making demands, let alone do anything. I'm trying my very hardest as not to just kill you right now. Don't. Push. Your. Luck." The voice sounds sinister, but I think I need to listen for now. Why not just kill me now? Why wait? My breathing starts to become normal again, I need to gather my strength and get into a better position before I try something again.
It speaks to me again "if I see you try something again, I won't hesitate. Play nice or play dead." I feel the weight being lifted off my back. I wait for a moment before slowly turning off my front, and sitting up with difficulty, muscle memory tries to tell me to use my arms, but that's of no use... There's a few moments of silence, as I look at the distorted being with a stare that could kill.
I try to load, but its not working, just what the hell is up with this place?
"Your wounds prevent use of your power, you shouldn't have gotten hit."
Shit... I have to stall for time, look for an opening.
Black text in the difference, in a language that looks so foreign, yet familiar at the same time... What is it?
"What is this place?" I ask as I take deep breaths, the voice waits a moment before responding. "A place beyond your reality, a bridge between it and many others."
I process what they say. "...What in hell is that supposed to mean?"
The figure seems to pace around in front of me "Hmm... Each one of the realities you saw with Frisk was you saw was a 'room' in the 'house' that is our existence. There are thousands of these rooms, each of them a world, a world not too unlike own, but with things that are just a bit different. You were seeing those other rooms. The foyer of this house is the root reality, the foundation to every other room in the house. The one I am from, as far as I can tell at least."
I let them continue, trying to wrap my head around their analogy. "Maybe I'm doing a poor job explaining, I've never been much of a teacher. The bottom of the line is, we're in the hall, or the windows, the only way to see both in, and out of this house, and all of its many rooms..." The voice ponders something.
I shift to get a bit more comfortable, essentially out of options to fight, but I gotta... never mind."And? Whats outside this 'house'?" I ask, still not fully comprehending the situation i'm in.
"This... is only a hypothesis, but my assumption is that our 'house' was built by something, or someone far beyond our comprehension, and we're just entertainment for them. We're just fiction, no, worse, the base reality is the fiction, we're just sub-fiction... I see them peering in on occasion, but I can never make out their forms. Even now, I feel their presence, watching us."
"You're saying we're just made up? That everything I've lived through didn't even really happen?" I say, obviously skeptical, and kind of upset. I really hope this is just a lie, or something to try and get my guard down, I get my mind off of it to ask them something else. "Who the hell are you anyways?" I ask, attempting to quell the impatience in my voice.
"Does that really matter? I'm just a Monster who got in way over his head, I played with fire and got burned. I've trapped here for what has felt like millennia, but I feel I have a way out now..." He pauses for a moment "You are my way out. I need you, your body, and your soul to be free at last." The near formless voice's words echo across the white dream-scape.
I don't respond, still feeling overwhelmed.
The white landscape... Black words litter the otherwise spotless area, in a language I'm starting recognize, but still can't read... The words stay constant, only increasing in numbers as time goes on. Its all so confusing...
I make up my mind. "Why do you hate me?" I ask him my voice distant. "What have I done to you to deserve what you've done to me?" I continue, my voice a mix of frustration and sadness.
"I don't hate you, child. You simply offer the best opportunity for me." He remarks, then continues after my silence. "You are the center of this sub-fiction. If I take your soul, your body as my own, I can free myself from this prison."
I get mad, the pain of gritting my teeth isn't present despite my trying. "What gives you the right? What have I ever done?!" I start to shout, repeating myself.
"Child..." The voice seemingly whispers. "Let me ask you a question. Me and my dear brother used to discuss this all the time, but we had disagreements about it, causing us to eventually drift apart..." He takes a deep breath, but I can hardly care over my own feelings of anger.
"Do you think even the worst person can change...?" he starts "that everybody can be a good person, if they just try?" the voice tapers off. "My brother thought that anyone could change if given the right circumstance, but I believe, that a bad person stays a bad person, and I've yet to be proven wrong. People don't change, they just change their methods. But maybe... I kept wanting to believe him, and I gave you chance after chance, circumstance, after circumstance to change your ways. But you didn't."
"After years of calling to you on the surface, you finally came. When you finally arrived into the cold of Snowdin, I had sent a creation of mine to dispatch of you, and bring your dormant body and soul to me, but to my surprise, you fought back with vigor, even in the harsh cold. I saw how you had just barely survived in the old restaurant, I watched you the whole time, gave you your belongings back, interested in studying you, giving you a second chance. Maybe the center of the sub-fiction could prove me wrong?"
"The stage for the experiment was set, I gave you a way out in secret. I trapped one of my creations, made it harmless, made it call for help. You found it, and killed it over freeing it. If you would have let the creation free, I wouldn't have harmed you again, I would have even helped you out of the underground, but no, you proved me right by slaughtering it. I confronted you via proxy, but you managed to escape, surviving an attack that would break the will of anyone, how you survived was an anomaly, even to me."
"It was around that time, as I was ordering my creations, that I started to feel a lot of guilt over what I was doing to you. I thought 'maybe the creation in the trap was a bit too dastardly of a test, that maybe if it was your first exposure to a creation, you would have freed it.' You managed to make it to New Home in one piece, something I didn't expect, but you had guidance from the prince's husk. I gave you one last chance, one last freedom. My attacks on you gave me a better window to your mind on the surface, and I watched as you went to the surface, and proved me right yet again, as you slaughtered innocent Human after innocent Human. I became very angry, but still suffered with cognitive dissonance, my mind fighting with itself. So, I spoke with you during your sickness, and invited you here to talk."
"I've been exploring multiple realities for a suitable candidate for eons. You were perfect, Young, gifted, and a cross breed, something that exists in so few realities it was really a treat to find that you were a naturally angry and violent person, and most critically of all, able to RESET... If I take over you, I can escape, potentially make it back to my original reality, or even to the actual reality beyond the house... I never would have been interested in you if you weren't a bad person, child. I hope you don't take it personally. If I'm going to kill you, and steal your form, I least wanted to tell you that in person, I just wish you didn't make it so difficult." He finishes.
I look down at my fuzzy form as I feel my mind in a daze, before I start to get angry again.
"I NEVER WOULD HAVE KILLED IN THE FIRST PLACE IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU! YOU RUINED MY LIFE WITH YOUR DAMN VOICES!" I screech back, a primal rage within me.
All becomes black, as feeling of dread washes over me. The being gets closer to me, step by step.
"Excuses, excuses. You know what you did. What was his name? Your first kill, it was a child, wasn't it?"
"This is all your fault. I would never have killed him." I mutter to him, before I take a deep breath. The voices started, causing this all! Jacob Fischer... I didn't like you, but even you didn't deserve that.
"Oh...? You really do think this is my fault. I know you aren't stupid, child. Is your recollection failing you?"
...
"Look within yourself, child. Take responsibility for your actions." The voice whispers into my mind.
Did... I really do that? My lingering doubts, fuzzy memories, were they...?
"I... don't... remember." I admit, ashamed.
They don't respond.
"Can you show me it...?" I ask him. "I need to see it. Do you have the power to show me?" I ask with fervor, I need to know this, it changes everything.
"Hm... That would require me to look through your mind invasively. That means giving your soul and body to me, if even for a moment." They say incredulously.
"If I'm going to have prove you wrong, you're gonna have to prove that to me first." I say to them, with no stumbling.
They have a hearty laugh "as bold as ever. If you're going to hand yourself to me like that, I won't decline... but how do you know I won't just fabricate a memory,or that I'm not just lying to you now?"
"If you were the type of person to lie about that, you probably would have just killed me right away. I'm willing to take that chance." I say, looking up at them.
"Very well." they say, before my conscious starts to fade, him setting a part of himself on my head.
Every urge in my body tells me to fight back against this invasion, but I don't.
I can't, I have to let them.
I...
A feeling of distance through the eyes I have. Like being in the backseat of the car I'm driving.
I remember this... This is who I used to be...
"Be careful now students! These are state of the art machines, but that doesn't mean you don't have to be safe!" The teacher yells at us from behind his desk in the corner of the shop. A dull grey room littered with dead tree, the air has the smell of sawdust, as dozens of students work in separate places. So many different faces, all sharing the same boring blue uniforms, but with white aprons, gloves, and face masks.
Its wood-shop... This was my favorite thing about school, I used to make all sorts of fancy boxes, signs, and trinkets, it was what I looked forward to every week.
I'm making a simple small chest, maybe to put jewelry or other small jewelry in. I was planning on making it for Mom, her birthday was coming up. I had a real bad habit of forgetting birthdays, and I wanted to make sure I didn't this year.
I don't pay any mind to the teachers warnings, I never liked hurting myself, and being safe was easy. So many of the other kids would be absentminded, sneaking glances at their phones, or clowning around around active equipment. Morons.
Sanding and polishing were always my least favorite parts of wood-shop, but I wasn't doing that today. I was making cuts for the lid of the chest, the base has already been finished sanded, and varnished. This may not be the most efficient way to go about things, but I need to take a break from the boring stuff, and use one of these really neat buzz-saws to do so. I've been working on it for months now, pouring my heart and soul into it. I really want to impress her, I look upon the finished work so far, it looks awesome. Its sight in my workspace keeps me determined to do even the boring work.
I brush upon the lid of chest, while its still far from finished, it already looks good. I burned in an illustration of a sunflower onto the base, my mothers favorite flower, and I may do the same for the lid when I'm finished with it.
Its a slow day, but I'm allowed to work in peace, something that is never a guarantee for me here.
But I have a feeling my peace is not long for the world.
It started with a nudge to my shoulder as I was about to make a small cut. "Whatcha makin?" I hear a snide voice behind me.
My eyes roll, and I take a deep breath and turn around, after setting the chest lid aside, and releasing the pressure switch underneath the table, deactivating the saw.
Jacob Fischer.
A face only a fist could love, if even that. He's always antagonizing me with small bullshit, never anything physical, but always annoying crap just to waste my time. "Leave me alone." I say sternly to him, before turning back around, hoping to start to work again.
"You're not gonna answer me?" Jacob says to me, snidely, continuing to test my dwindling patience. I curl my fist, tempted to sock him, before sighing, and resisting.
"Not to you, no." I respond to him, he starts to say something afterwards but doesn't hear past the sound of the table saw being reactivated. Not a few moments later, I feel another nudge. I gently put down lid, making sure not to have it be harmed, even though its just a glorified wood block, its not something I want to have to do again. Once its safe, and the saw has been shut off via the safety plate, I shoot around again and put my finger in his face, right under his chin getting a little jump out of him.
"Don't you have anything to do then waste both of our time?" I say right to his surprised face "of course you don't, all you do is be useless, and make people waste their times trying to do dumb things to you. Dumbass, get out of my face." I lay into him, as he looks upon me with his dumbstruck face. I turn back around as he trys to fumble something out of his stupid mouth. Before I know it, I'm working on the lid again, a smile on my face from having told him off.
I'm not giving peace for even a moment, as a loud crash is heard, making me jump, messing up my cut. I look to my left, to my workspace, to see my beautiful box in pieces, months of hard work shattered across my workspace, met by a hammer held by Jacob. He looks at me with this cocky smile as my fists start to curl in rage.
I snap, and give him the outburst he's been wanting for oh so long.
It was there, in a moment of seething anger, that Jacobs head met the buzz-saw, eyes first. In that moment, where I was dyed a thick red and grey for the first time. In that moment, did my peers truly have a reason to fear me. And in that moment... it was me who did it, alone...
No voices, no suggestions, no manipulation, only anger...
It was only me...
This is who I am.
Sure enough, control of my body is given back to me, putting me into a choking fit, one of the strangest feelings of pain I've ever felt. After my fit of heaving, I take a moment to breath, and to think, as I acclimate to the white void again.
"So? Are you satisfied?" The voice asks inquisitively, standing not too far from me, they're not facing in my direction... I could try to attack him again, but... its not worth it, not anymore...
It takes me a moment to respond. "What kinda question is that...? Of course I'm not satisfied." My voice cracks, the voice turns around towards me, as I feel a wet sense around my eyes.
What did I do all of this for? I let out an aggravated scream as I slam the back of my head off the ground repeatedly.
"You're right." I spit in shame. "I haven't changed." It takes a lot of will and exasperation to get those words out.
"..." The voice responds with silence.
I grit my teeth.
The form kneels to get onto my level, as I lie on the ground, only barely looking up to see what resembles a face.
"While I'm in this space between reality, I can only barely see into anything but the underground. When I came to the edge of your reality, all I saw was a faint outline of you, who you were, and what you had done. I watched you with great patience, so when I had saw you took a life, I eagerly started to call to your mind, the only power I had over you from so far. I... didn't know the consequences it would have on your life."
The voice continues, their voice still as lined with static as ever. "When I showed you that memory, I was able to look through your memories, and see your life in full while you re-experienced your first murder. You went through so much pain because of me, pain no one deserves. For that, you have my sincerest apologies, I would have found another way if I knew. You saw the true nature of Humanity, through and through."
"Whats that supposed to mean?" I nervously ask as I still lay back on the ground.
"Look at how they've treated this reality. They ravage the earth, bankrupt it of its resources, kill each other to no end. They killed my family, our family, off of nothing but petty hate and flimsy religion. Look at how they treated you, you were half of them, and they had no qualms planning to put you to death, your father had to fight to get you into a sanitarium that was almost worse then death!" He starts to get heated.
"I argued with the king for so long that trying to to escape peacefully was a stupid, asinine idea, I told him that the Humans wouldn't have changed, and now look, I was RIGHT! Once I take your body, I'll go and do what that senile grandfather of your should have done long ago! I will exterminate every Human in this damn world, before moving realities, and repeating the process if necessary! Child, know your sacrifice will not be in vain, think of how many Monsters will get to live peacefully because of your body..." They put their distorted hand on my shoulder, which I shake off.
"Am I supposed to feel happy that your going to commit genocide with my body? For someone who watched Frisk for so long, you didn't learn a damn thing from her." I say, starting to become upset again, but I can't summon anymore will to fight. I'm no better then they are...
"I've seen how much you hate Humans, why do you act apathetic now? After everything they've done to you! Look at how your Human mother abandoned you!"
I wince, his words striking true. Almost every Human I've met has been nothing but bad to me, Frisk was the only Human I had ever met who was always kind to me. Racists, bullies, abusers... all of them.
The being reads my mind again. "So you agree with me?"
A moment of hesitation, as I choose my words.
"I... I do." I admit. "But this is going to far, there are good people out there, people like Frisk. I can't stop you, but I beg of you, please don't do this." I speak up to them, hoping to change their mind.
"I know there are good people, there are always variables in any sample size. As much as I want to allow a few of those variables to live, that just isn't an option. The survivors would grow to hate their new Monster rulers, and they are still much too strong. Even if I take away their ability to breed, it would only end with an empty earth."
They have this all planned out...
I want to be okay with this, but... it makes my heart heavy. This is too much death, it makes me sick. But I imagine it, a world with only Monsters, it sounds like... paradise. A paradise that can only exist without me...
"I don't want to think about this anymore. Just k-kill me already..." I stutter out, my confusion getting the better of me.
"Very well. I'm glad you could understand the solution, and that we didn't have to fight. This is nothing personal against you. Its for the greater good, I, and the Monsters will always remember you as a hero." They comfort me earnestly, before beginning to charge an intense magical energy over my head.
I swallow, tears start to burst forth at last, before I remember one last thing.
"Please. Make me a promise." I quietly ask while I feel the magic energy above my head.
"Speak, if you need me to relay a message, I can do so."
"Please don't hurt Asriel, even if he tries to hurt you. Let him know I asked you that." I ask in defeat. "And... tell my dad I love him, and I'm sorry- s-sorry for being bad." I finish, hardly able to get the words out.
The figure returns an empty silence, before speaking again.
"You have my word."
Someone, anyone, please help...
I feel myself fade away.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I wasn't good enough.
Somewhere else, years later.
"I need morphine! Right now, or they aren't gonna make it!" I shout to the busy tent, as I hold an older woman's innards in, her moaning mingles with the moans of many other pained survivors. One of the other doctors gives me a small, but sad shake of the head. "We're out?!" I ask incredulously.
"Cut them off, we have no choice. We've done all we can." They say to me, I can only barely hear them as I look at the scared and bloody patient. I let out a pained shout of my own, before administering a lethal injection to my last half hours work. Soon, the whole tent is just more corpses to add to the pile. My job has been more life then death for over two years now, ever since that... thing made itself known...
After we leave the tent, the sounds of the outside become clear. A drab city-side moored by gunfire and explosions, all feeble attempts at stopping the beast only a few short kilometers away. They're probably getting ready to ship us off soon, to the next city the thing will attack...
I feel myself lose balance, before I fall to the muddy ground face first, only being stopped by my fellow doctors by the arms as my knees make contact with the ground. "You alright?" They both ask. "Of course not. These damn bowl heads have us worked to the bone." I say, the exhaustion getting to me. I haven't slept in over two days, with only awful MRE's to keep me going. My smock and hands are drenched in dried blood, having hardly even a moment to wash my hands, let alone my clothes. Its not just me, everyone else is in similar levels of dress and cleanliness. We are people of life, but we all look like death, and we've done more killing then saving...
Eventually, I regain my balance, and we all quietly walk towards the command center.
Soldiers afraid to die, civilians terrified, and now medics tired.
Humanity is doomed.
A god has arisen in support of a Monster kingdom long since past, a kingdom that wants nothing to do with the god. But the god doesn't seem to care, and has been razing the world, hell bent on seeing the destruction of Humanity.
Do we deserve it? Maybe? Who knows, this god is not one for conversation. When an a parley was formed with world leaders and was sent to the god through a Monster messenger, the God accepted, only to slaughter every single one of the world leaders upon the meeting, taking the easy opportunity as a chance to take advantage of a scared world. Hell, even the people off earth are already planning a "Noah's Ark" deal to save the Human race. Our last chance as a species is something that probably isn't gonna work, we don't have the time to make a ship that big and future proofed.
Every day is just prolonging the inevitable. I'm about to give up, honestly.
Heh... thats what I'm good at, aren't I...?
I need a nap...
A large explosion knocks me to the ground, I squelch into the mud. This isn't good.
I feel shell-shock, and voices through it as I keep my eyes closed, my ears ringing a storm, I gesture and yell to the doctors trying to get me up to get out of here. I'm not the one they should be helping...
Once I open my eyes a few moments, or minutes, later, I look around myself. Everything is destroyed... everything was just fine a few moments ago, what happened? I slowly rise, looking for anyone else, but there's only bodies.
I keep looking around, expecting things to change, but they don't, eventually looking down to the mud, where a small puddle refracts the light of a hopeless dawn. My face is much the same, mud and disgusting unkempt hair, but there's something else in the reflection, a floating figure.
I turn around, taking a sharp breath, and falling back into the mud.
"What a pleasant surprise. I didn't expect to find you here." The god speaks a strange echoing voice. A Monster that looks like a Human, or the other way around. I try to speak back confused words, but I can't, I'm completely petrified. "Oh, you're scared out of your mind, but that's fair."
The being floats down closer to me, they have this haunting beauty to them, despite not being particularly pretty. They wear ragged clothing, including a white lab coat that matches their pale skin all too well. Their face has a mix of tired features and wrinkles, on a paradoxically youthful profile. They almost remind me of someone...
I continue to shudder as their blank eyes look me over, no doubt planning on my death. I continue to try to force my words out, but its still no good. I want to close my eyes and wait for the end, but I just can't keep my eyes off them.
"This fear you feel. I wonder if its the same fear your daughter felt when you abandoned her." Their words cut deep into my soul, clearing my throat for a word.
How do they know? Why do they care? Why do... they...
"A-Ash?" I manage to work out, as I notice the resemblance.
"There was once a time this body belonged to someone with that name. That time has passed, but I felt due diligence to at least say; they missed you, and somehow didn't hold a grudge for the horrible thing you did to them."
"I'm... so sorry..." I say, closing my eyes, letting my tears mix with the mud. One last regret.
"I'm sure you are." The god says before ending my life.
I look at my hands, clear, but visible even in my dark confines.
Years have passed, haven't they?
Still, I persist.
I wonder if they know, that I'm still here.
My soul, my body, its no longer my own.
I get to see them make their wishes become reality.
They raze the earth, with unreal magics, in a form that only vaguely resembles myself. Every Human, man or woman, old or young, is slaughtered like clockwork. No remorse, not even a bit. Even the Monster community is terrified of me, but they still continue. They never rest, only kill, in the name of "justice" and "peace." And can't stop watching every second of it.
I'm trapped again, another six sided room, only a small window tells me something exists outside of it. A jail in my former soul. I thought, that maybe death would be the end. But no, that would have been to happy an ending for me, wouldn't it have? Its not as bad as the asylum though, time seems to pass much faster when I nod off, and I can nod off for a very long time. But I don't, I need to watch this.
Because my time is running out, this worlds time is running out.
Only the last stragglers of Humanity remain.
Forced into hiding in the strangest part of the worlds, they have to look around of cranny of the earth and beyond to make sure their job is done. Rebel forces gather, with some of the strongest weapons ever created, to try to stop them, but its no good. They have become a god, everything is hopeless, even if they do somehow die, they can just reset and try again.
Regret is all I feel, as I watch all this pointless death.
I'm sad, because I didn't know this was the endgame, that this would end up not only damning the earth, but how many others will they do this too? If I had another chance, maybe I could have negotiated with him? Maybe there was something I missed... Something, anything other than this. If I would have just killed myself back in the ruins, they never would have gotten to my body and soul. That really would have been for the better...
I'm already dead, and maybe this is the hell I deserve. Poetic justice. I'm a killer, I can't save the world, I can only watch it burn, with the stabbing uncertainty that maybe there was something I could have done to stop this.
Are they right? Is this reality going to be better without Humans? It probably is, isn't it?
But how many good people have to die to pave that road? And how many in the next reality, and the next after that?
Too many.
Too many...
I'm sorry Frisk. I know you would be really disappointed in me.
It'll be over soon, maybe I should just go to sleep already... for good.
"I have succeeded. There are no more." I'm woken up to hear them speak, something they haven't really done often. So, they did it...
Downtown New Providence, the many high rises are in ruin, as nature begins to reclaim the once bustling city center. Nature is winning at last. Whatever remains of me watch's out the small window of my soul, they look down on the Monsters. They think themselves a god, not only more powerful then everyone else, but smarter too. Hubris, but there's no one who can stop them, not anymore.
I can see Asgore, and Toriel among the many faces in the front. They look angry.
My grandmother shouts up at them."You fool! We never wanted this!"
"The child often not wants what is best for them." They speak with such arrogance...
My grandfather pipes up. "You are the child here! Destroying that which you don't like!" He speaks with a booming anger I've never heard from him.
They swoop down to meet him at eye level, many of the Monsters run in fear, those who don't, flinch. All except for the former king, who stands his ground, fearless to the tyrant.
"You foolish king, you should have listened to me the first time, and this never would have happened. It was only due time until they killed you all anyways."
Asgore's face falters for a moment, as he realizes something.
"Wing? Is that you? How are you back?!" Asgore speaks in confusion. Is that its name, Wing?
"I thought you would have forgotten about me, like you forgot about what the Humans did-" Asgore interrupts Wing. "I don't forget about my friends."
"..." Wing is stunned, giving Asgore another chance to speak.
"Please... If you have the power to make this right, please do so, Wing. For old times sake." Asgore tries to reason with Wing. They respond with silence, as they look down, as if thinking.
Suddenly, a Monster runs from the masses, and jumps at Wing.
Instead, meeting my former body with an embrace.
"Ash... Why are you doing this? Please stop this..."
Its my dad...
Wing shakes him off, he lands on the ground with a thud, a look of hurt on his face, as Asgore helps him up.
"You too? Hmm... I'm surprised you know who this body used to belong too, I thought I did well enough to change its appearance. Its no use, they are long dead, their body just made a good vessel for my self." My dad looks stunned...
"You took my granddaughters body...?" Asgore asks, I can see his fist gritting.
"What should you care, she was one of them. A Human, a murderer. But they were willing to give up their body in the end, they even agreed with my plan." Wing almost gloats.
"We won't allow this any longer Wing, make this right." Asgore demands as him and as wife make sure their son is alright, who looks sadly up on Wing's form.
Wing looks upon the massive crowd of Monsters, all gathered, all looking upon them in either fear or anger. They seem to contemplate a decision for a few moments, before finally making a decree.
"I already have."
They use a massive burst of power to banish the many Monsters from their sight, not killing them, just removing them from the premises, except for my father... He simply looks dazed, not even looking for any of his cohorts.
"Gabriel Dreemurr. Your daughter wanted me to tell you that she loved you, and that she was sorry for being a killer. You are a good man, one worthy... of your fathers title. You would have made an excellent king, I'm sorry for the circumstances life has dealt you." Wing fulfills a promise made to me...
"You've taken everything else from me already, you killed my daughter, you killed my job, you killed my friends, you killed my wife... so take my life too, you monster." My father says blankly, looking down at his feet. It breaks my heart seeing him like this...
"I'm... sorry for the grief you suffer. Live past it." Wing decrees, before vanishing my Father from his sight, surely amongst the other Monsters.
The float up a bit higher, looking upon the empty displays of the city, having not been powered for a long time. A floating apocalypse... A dead world in their wake.
They grit their fists.
The people they tried to save think them a villain.
Wing seems to float here for a long time, pondering again. When are they going to leave, to the next reality? Or are th
"What are you looking to accomplish here?" A familiar voice calls to Wing.
Wing looks down, panning their head for a person, but they don't find one.
Only a lone flower among the cement.
Asriel...
"You. What do you sprout from your burrow for?" Wing asks them, a bit of irration present.
"I just want closure, before I destroy you." Flowey says firmly.
Wing lets loose a hysterical laugh.
"I accomplished my goal. I saved Monsters, I returned to reality. What are you looking to accomplish, prince?"
"You need to let go. This world was perfectly well off without you playing god. But who knows, it takes a hypocrite to know a hypocrite. You killed my niece, so I'm going to make sure her body can rest in peace too." He speaks as if its no big deal...
"And how do you plan on doing that?"
"Heehee. You're not the only one who can kill a few Humans."
Seven souls erupt from Flowey's form, before coalescing back into him.
No... you won't win, get out of here Asriel! I try to cry out to them, but its no good.
Asriel takes a godlike form, like the one I saw in the mirror gallery of realities.
"I feel again... And I feel ANGRY!" Asriel shouts, floating on a similar level to Wing. He wears a black robe emblazon with a delta rune, his adult face a far cry from the child with the same name.
Wing laughs. "Very clever. Now, I made a promise to Ash. That I wouldn't hurt you, even if you tried. DON'T MAKE ME BREAK THAT PROMISE." Their voice bangs.
"Don't worry, you won't." Asriel says, before readying a giant attack over himself.
No... Please...
"What a shame. You haven't changed at all. Goodbye."
NO!
Asriel's godlike attack is nullified in an instant, and Wing retaliates with a mighty attack of his own.
Asriel dies with a whimper, his power a speck compared to Wing's, his last face one of shock, and awe.
No...
I retreat to the corner of my cell, not wanting to see anymore. I cry blank tears, my only other request broken.
What did my life even mean? I caused nothing but pain and death.
Haven't I suffered enough?
Haha...
I have.
Time to fall asleep, for good.
Sleep upon sleep.
Uneasy dreams, but they aren't nightmares.
Until I awake in a cold sweat.
I'm in my bedroom. Its a white wonderland outside my window, snowflakes constantly flying down from the heavens. Nice and warm, underneath my blankets, protecting me from the cold. I'm sick as usual, but I don't really care. I'm comfortable, and I'm happy.
I can stay home all day, play video games, drink hot cocoa, eat chicken noodle soup, and talk with mom and dad. I could spend my entire life like this, in my comfortable bed, doing this same sniffling day over and over...
"Hey sweetie, you alright?" My dad peaks his head through my door, his warm smile does good on my weary heart. I nod my head from under my covers, only the top half of my head peaking out. My dad enters my room, and sits at the foot of my bed, before making careful not to sit on my legs, his heavy weight craters in the corner, almost disrupting my placement. My dad is a thinner boss monster, not like the tanky man his father was before him, but one was a warrior king, and the other is a warrior of words, so it fits. He doesn't have the blond facial hair like his father either, only some long blond hair, and the same soft smile.
"Your mother is downstairs making cocoa for you. If you need anything else, just holler for me!" He exclaims, before an exaggerated yodel, which makes me laugh. He pats my legs, before heading back to the door. "I'll always love you dear, no matter what." He says at the door, before leaving. Soon after, my mom enters my room with a tray, with a single mug on it.
"Hello there, I brought you- agh!" She starts before tripping on her way to me, spilling the hot cocoa all over my carpet, getting a small yelp out of us both. She seems to look really distraught about the mistake, eventually kneeling over to grab the cup. Tears stain her beautiful complexion, tears for a mundane error. "I'm... so sorry..." She repeats to me, before she leaves, coming back shortly after with supplies to clean the rug in silence. "I hope you can forgive me." She says in the doorway, before leaving, not to be seen again until tomorrow, where we'll do this again, and she'll leave just before I say "I was never angry with you."
Everyone's coming over today, for what reason, I don't know, but once again, I don't really care. I don't want to question it too much.
"Hey sleepyhead, you look lively!" My good friend Charlotte is in the door. I smile at her presence, we talk for a bit, as she paces around my room. But eventually, its time for her to go. "I really miss you." She says before leaving, her mother is in the door too, and she looks at me with many sad eyes.
Everyone is here, even the skeleton brothers, Sans and Papyrus. They both come up to my room and entertain me for a bit. I don't know them all too well, and I don't even like them all too much, but they still treat me like a friend regardless. As fast as they arrive, they leave.
Undyne, Alphys, and Zelda all pay me a visit too. They are such a whacky couple, a bunch of a nerds, with a nerd daughter... We all talk about geek stuff, like new games. But they leave too, making way for another visitor.
Grandpa, and grandma, king and queen. Toriel baked me a pie, and Asgore came with a knit sweater. They tell me how they can't wait for me to get better, and all the things they want to talk about. They say they are sorry they couldn't have told me the truth earlier.
A boy named Asriel came by to visit with his parents too, he's a nice kid, a bit snarky, but kind. We play some chess together, he thoroughly stomps me, as usual, but I actually win a game today. I can't see his face clearly, a sort of fuzziness gets in the way, but I can tell he wears a smile with pride. He has a hard time leaving, but he has to too. He leaves a potted plant on my night table, its a nice golden flower. I enjoy spending time with him, I can't wait to see him tomorrow.
After him, a big slimy blob named Quill comes to visit me. He asks how everything been for me, and listens to me diligently as I go over my adventures. He comforts me in my pain, and soothes my soul. Like a second father, I wouldn't trade him for anything. When he finally wrestles himself away from me, he says something strange to me. " I'm so proud of you... Live for you, and only for you."
Frisk joins me, but only for a few moments. They don't speak, only placing a hand on my leg, before leaving with a pained expression. I want to talk with them, apologize, but I can't get it out. Maybe tomorrow.
All my visitors for the day. There's no one else, its late out, and its time to get some more sleep.
But there is someone new.
Turning around in my computer chair, away from tapping of the keyboard is a strange child in a striped shirt. They've been there all day, I just haven't paid them any mind. They look at me closely, before asking me "You know this is a dream, right?"
"...Yes." I speak.
"You seem happy, I haven't seen you smile so much before."
"This is what I've always wanted." I say quietly.
They sit quietly for a moment, looking around my room.
"...You... Still have a chance to stop Wing."
"I'm sure I do. But I don't have it in me, I'd rather just be here." I say, turning over in my bed.
"You can save billions of lives. Your mother, your uncle included."
"I'm a killer, they don't need me. I'm no better then he is, and he's right, the world is better off." I say with a voice crack. "He is correct. However, correct and right are two very different things."
They get up from the chair, then sit on the often occupied foot of my bed.
"But what do you want?" They ask inquisitively. "If you could have this any way you wanted, this would be much different, wouldn't it?"
"Of course." I admit.
They take a deep breath. "If this dream is what you're content with, stay with it. But you still have a chance to live your life the way you want. It doesn't matter what you've done, only what you will do. Take responsibility or don't, do it for them, or do it for you, listen to my words, or don't. You're in control, you can make the choices you want to make."
I sit up from my bed for the first time in this dream.
"Live for you, and only for you..." I repeat Quill's words. But those aren't his words, that's just what I wanted to hear... what I needed to hear.
"So, what will you do?"
I stare at a photo, affixed over my desk.A photo from an entirely different time, one before this ever happened.
"I'll try again." I say blankly.
"Very well. I look forward to seeing the choices you are given, and what you will decide."
As I get up from my bed, my room contorts back into the prison cell in my soul, and walk to the door. I start to push and pull on the bars.
"He can't read your thoughts here. So think your plan of attack now, you won't get another chance." The voice suggests behind me.
I keep pushing and pulling on the bars with all my might. I start to get angry, before getting determined. I'm gonna give this one more go, lets see how it turns out.
"You won't ever see me again. This is goodbye, Ash." The voice says behind me as I start to make progress, the door shakes.
"Thank you." I say honestly over the constant shaking.
"You're very welcome. Good luck." They say, before vanishing, leaving me alone in the cell.
I don't have time to mourn the strangers absence, only strong-arming the door.
"OPEN! UP!" I yell at the door as it gives a bit more.
"COME ON, OPEN UP!" I feel it giving even more.
Eventually, it slams open, and my vision fades.
"What is this..." Wing hunches over, grasping his borrowed stomach.
He's in the void again, for what reason I don't know, but I can feel it.
He laughs as he realizes, even as he keels in pain.
"So you still remain. I should have known you would have clung on to life." He says, obviously angry.
"Leave this husk at once." Wing says, before I feel a weird feeling of suction, followed by an intense dizziness. I seem to gain some sort of tangible form again, as I land on the the empty ground with a light thud, finally free of my own body.
I slowly rise, looking upon my body as a stranger. They still wear my clothing, only with a long white coat. My horns have elongated to a disgusting long degree, and my face has all sorts of strange markings and my eyes an empty soulless white. I look like a demented horror B-movie villain, yuck, they have no taste.
I look down at my hands, and I'm nothing but a silhouette of my previous form. A ghost of a ghost.
"Amazing. Even without a soul or body, you remain alive. Is it your will made real, or is this just the power of a realities center? Perhaps a side effect of this place?" They ponder, with a finger under their chin, they look upon me with a smirk.
I look at them with a thousand yard stare.
"So why have you returned? Looking for a fight again? You won't stand a chance, I'm more powerful then you can even imagine." He says with a snide grin.
"I know, and I don't care." I say to him, I'm not afraid. "I'm here to win, I never lost." I remark.
"Very well, you haven't changed at all." They say, readying intense magic in their palms.
I smile at his remark, and ready magic of my own. Its weak compared to his, but whatever.
I'm gonna win.
Fighting for days.
I have to do so with attrition, predicting their magical blasts with perfection, only managing to get my attacks as they ready theirs. It only aggravates them, hardly doing much of anything, but they haven't managed to hit me once, and I've hit them with countless fireballs, spears, or otherwise.
"HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?" They screams with rage as their godlike attacks all miss their mark. they're getting tired, but jokes on them, they has a still mortal body, I don't. I can do this all day. And that's my opening, they are going to be too tired eventually.
I don't respond to their anger, only smiling.
I keep gaining ground, their attacks grow weaker, and slower as the fighting rages on.
Duck under a laser, counter with a fireball as I jump over a blast, and eek under a fireball of theirs. Rinse and repeat, just in different orders.
They take a break, deep breaths, still attacks at the ready, I think they may be trying to baiting me.
I sprint in place, waiting for the next attack.
"You call yourself a god? You're just a poser." I say to them with a smile, which of course, procs an angry outburst of magic, but its sloppy, and easy to avoid.
Between attacks, I see them kneel over for a cough. Now's my chance! Dive onto them with a spear!
"You fool!" They predict my attack, blasting where I dive from with a gigantic beam, destroying me instantly
Wing stands triumphantly as they hyperventilate. "Foolish, I thought they would have learned."
"I have." I say as I stab a spear through their hip, having snuck behind them.
What I thought, wasn't what I did.
They stand still as they laugh between pained gasps.
"I can still reset you damn child, I can still-"
No you can't.
They stay still as I come around them from the other side, getting a look at their pained face, as it morphs from a defiant smile to a scared frown.
"Ha... Haha. Clever, clever. No wonder you were doing so good. I thought determination was a trait of the soul, but I suppose it isn't." I see them try to move around, but it does no good. I used a disabling spear, he took no damage, but he can't do a damn thing anymore.
"Go ahead, take your body back child. Let me take my original form again, you'll find that I can't die easily."
"Not really interested."
His face speaks confusion.
"I'm doing this for revenge. For myself." I say as I look at him solemnly.
"Revenge for your mother? For your uncle? For an earth of evil Humans?"
"Nah. For me. I couldn't care less about the Humans, your world sounds like paradise, but I still want revenge, for me." I say to them.
"And how do you plan on that? I'm immortal, as long as I live, you will never have your freedom." They look at me with a smile. "Go ahead, reset to before all this. Live your feeble life out in the underground, as I send legions of my creations after you. I'll do this as many times as I need too." They get increasingly heated up as they speak.
"If I wanted to reset and waste your time, I would have done it already." I say, looking over them. "I know, or, at least I can guess, there's only ONE way I can beat you."
"I'm listening." Wing says with an angry curiosity.
I retract my energy spear, allowing him movement again, much to their confusion, before they ready themselves once more.
I slowly walk towards them, as they prepare more intense magic in their palms, ready to strike me down at any moment.
I grab their palm slowly, and place it on my head, I feel the magic make me dizzy.
I get on my knees, keeping his palm on my head as they stand over me, their face still one of curiosity, and confusion.
"I've done bad things in my life. This is me letting go, this is me taking responsibility for it. Kill me now, I won't reset, I'll accept it. You keep my body, you keep my soul. You'll never see me again."
I close my eyes, I shake a bit. Its taking all my will to do this, but its the only way. The best reward for the risk.
"I win." I say with a crack of a smile. "Cuz I've changed."
I feel the magic in my forehead intensify.
A smile despite my tears.
I can't save this reality, but I know, I can the others by doing this. But that's besides the point, I can win in the end. Be the one they couldn't kill like all the rest.
"Just d-do it already." I say nervously as I still feel dizzy from the magic.
Wing begins to laugh, almost like they've lost their mind. I start to quiver more, hoping that they are the type of person I hope they are. One willing to admit defeat, that after they take care of me, they rethink their plans, maybe even back out of them. I'll lose this battle, but hopefully, I'll win this war.
My hands grip as hard as they can, holding his hands in place. "Just kill me!" I shout as they begin to laugh.
Their boisterous laughing turns increasingly uneasy, I can feel their hand begin to shake, their clean shot to my head gone. I firmly hold them in place, putting my absent forehead into his palms.
I would puke if I could, my head feels like its going to explode... even more then his first time killing me, cuz this time, I know whats on the line, and I want to win. I won't know if I've truly won, but...
"COME ON!" I scream through tears. What are they hesitating for? I'm just another Human to add to the pile.
They suddenly stop laughing, putting their arm to their side, after forcing my arms off.
Are they toying with me? Or...?
A disappointed sigh. "This has been... Quite the result."
I open my eyes, and look up, he's facing the other way, towards the many white walls of this strange place.
"Why aren't you killing me, isn't this what you wanted?" I ask, its my turn to be confused. My hearts still rushing...
"I got something better. I was proven wrong, congratulations, child. You're right, you won." They sit on the white floor, with crossed legs. "Get out of here, before I change my mind." Wing says, before parting from my body, it slinks back with a thud as their strange form bursts.
I anxiously approach the live corpse, I instinctively get back into the body like a coffin, and after a moment of nauseating dizziness, I regain control of it.
I feel around with my my new, older body. I feel very... powerful, just all around stronger. The absent form of Wing still sits in place, a few meters away.
A smile sneaks its way onto my face. This... went better than I could have possibly imagined.
"Thank you... you didn't have to give me my body back." I say as I sit down next to them. They don't respond.
I take a breath, looking into the distance with the person.
"What are you gonna do now?" I ask, my voice sounds foreign to me now. Ugh, I can't wait to be out of here...
"THEN JUST LEAVE." His voice booms, making me jump. "I was just trying to be nice, jeez..." I say in a pout.
We sit still for a little while, this place still so strange to me. My heart settles, I realize I'm free to go, but- "You are free. Just go already, leave me be. Don't rub your victory in."
"Answer my question, and I'll be gone." I say firmly.
They stay silent for a bit, again.
A scoff, before they talk "I've been here so long, and here I must remain until I find another way out." They state after some contemplation.
"You can't die here, huh?"
"No. I'm trapped in this prison of a body in this prison of a world." I hear the exhaustion in their voice.
I curl my fist, knowing full well the pain they live.
I sigh. "I ...know you may not want to wait, but one day, when I grow old and frail, I'll come back and give you a chance to live outside this hell, even if its just a few years."
Looking at Wing is like looking at a mirror, in a strange kinda way.
"..." They look down into their lap. "What do you want in return?" They ask, panning their head back to me.
"Its not gonna cost me anything, just take the offer. I get to live my life, you get to live a bit too. Not a big deal. Just... don't go overboard again." I tell him, before limbering up my arms a bit.
"Why would you do such a thing for me? After all I did?" I hear their voice crack.
"I won, and you gave me my body back, so it literally doesn't even matter anymore." I cross my legs and tilt my head. "Underground standard, try to kill someone, fail, be their friend afterwards. I don't know about being friends... but I can at least do you a favor."
"That's... very kind of you." They mutter.
I nod. "You're in the same spot I was. Trapped, and alone. Keep looking for a way out, just, uh, try to avoid any more murder sprees if you can." I say, scratching the back of my head, making sure to get the point across.
"My first lesson taught to me was that mistakes... were a chance to learn, not a reason to give up." Wing seems to think for a moment after a deep breath. "Child. What will you do now? That body of yours... you will grow to be even stronger then even I was when I razed the earth. That power may be too much for a single person to handle, how will you contain it, and make sure it doesn't corrupt you...?" Wing speaks with some concern.
I shrug. "Meh, I don't really care. I don't see myself wanting to do anything other then live a boring life, I don't want to do political or vigilante stuff, I don't want to rule the world or 'cleanse' it, hell, I didn't think I was even making it out of here alive, so I haven't planned any further. All I wanna do is go home and take a fucking nap."
Wing looks at me in silence, before they laugh, and they keep laughing. Like its the funniest joke they've ever heard...
"I look forward to seeing if you can hold to that."
Lets hope I can... Nah, I'll be fine.
We talk for a bit, I learn a bit more about them, even if they don't want to share many details. They were a researcher, or something along that line. They fell into the core, and somehow it trapped them between realities, but being here gave them strange powers. But all they wanted was freedom, and they admit, maybe the loneliness got to them in the end.
My neck is sore, god, these horns are heavy. Growing these outs are gonna suck...
I think if there's anything else I want to ask them, knowing I won't get the chance to talk to them again for a long time.
"Say, Wing... You said all these realities and such were all constructed by a greater power... Does that mean everything we've done, or will do is already predetermined? That its all pointless? That we aren't real?"
Wing sighs again. "There is no way to know for certain. I'd like to believe we have free will, but its just as likely that you're right. Try not to think about too much, live as though you have free will, and that your world is as real as can be. I wouldn't have even told you about this if I knew you were going free in the end. This is cursed knowledge, but maybe it doesn't affect you. Being the center of reality may make things different for you, you may just be the only one with any real permanence... But we are real, we're real to us, and that's all that matters."
I look down at my hands, grasping in and out.
"I'm going to get going now." I say, getting up, and getting my mind off fiction and reality, its all confusing, and I don't really care to be honest. "Check up on me any time, give me mind ring, and we can talk a bit."
Wing gets up with me. "I will do so."
"Before I go. Is there anyone you want me to relay a message to?"
"Not at all, I already got to speak to the one person I wanted to talk with" They say, with a small grin visible, even through their strange distorted form.
I look upon the white abyss for the last time.
"Good luck, Ash Dreemurr. Thank you, for showing me I was wrong, and for giving me another chance. A chance to change."
A small laugh as I think. "I should be the one saying that. See ya around, Wing."
I focus back to a time of safety, so long ago, and load.
Darkness, a feeling of comfort. I hear someone calling my name.
"Ash? Ash! Wake up you moron, its time to go!" Flowey speaks to me, I lift up my smaller arms from underneath the giant blanket, and light a small fire to see in the room. I'm back at the hotel room, from before the core!
I dispel the fire and lunge at Flowey, getting a yelp as I hug him in the big bed, spreading dirt all over. "Asriel! Its been so long!" I say with wet eyes as I rub him against me.
"What..? Whats your problem- oh... Did you reset? What happened?" His voice dips out.
I put his pot back down on the night table, and stretch my arms, glad to have them again as I feel my fingers and the rest of my body, glad to be somewhat clean again, Wing did not take care of my body whatsoever.
"I did it. I took care of the problem." I say triumphantly. "I'm free to go."
"If you reset, why can't I remember? How long has it been?" He looks at me with concern. "A... really long time. Be glad you don't remember." I say, thinking about his death. Is it better he doesn't know? No, I'll tell him everything, or at least, almost everything... "So, what was the cause?"
"I'll tell you on the way back to New Home. Its a long story." I say, still hugging him. He... doesn't seem to mind this time around.
"It must've been hell..." He mutters. "Nah, it wasn't that bad..." I whisper, taking the opportunity to rest a bit more.
I'm... free. Free at last.
I feel the cold breeze, early winter breeze, in the exit to the underground.
I stayed in New Home for one last night. Me and Asriel talked at lengths at what happened, about everything, about how I lost at first, to how Wing razed the earth with my body and powers, my long sleep afterwards, before I managed to turn the tables on him. I... left out some things, like everything about realities, fictions, centers, all and that junk, so I had to change the story up, just a bit. I asked him if he knew anything about any Monster named Wing, and he didn't, strangely enough. I wonder who he was, really...
All the mimics were gone, even the giant one in New Home. Wing seems to have kept his end up, so I should be fine to leave...
"You sure you'll be fine to leave...?" Flowey asks, with a lingering tone of regret, sadness, or maybe disappointment.
"A hundred percent." I say, as my clothing flops around in the wind. Its cold, but I'll be alright. It should be around late November or so, if my memory serves correct.
"Hey... can I ask you a favor?" Asriel asks me. "Only if you can do one for me." I say and look back to him, as he's set in the dirt again.
"Whats that...?" He says meekly. "There are some things I need to take care of, alone. Wait for me back at the beginning of the ruins, until I can return properly. I may be a while, but I'll be back. And then we'll come back out together!" I say triumphantly.
"..." He looks away. "So, what did you want to ask?" I ask him with a smile, sure that he's just sad to see me go.
"Never mind... I'll wait to ask, till another day. I don't want to ruin today for you." he mutters. I take a few steps forward, the light of the outside such a breath of fresh air, before turning back to him again.
"Nothing would ruin today, so you sure? I may not be back for a while." I ask, my smile fading a bit.
He looks away a bit. "I'm sure. I'll wait for you." I hope he's alright... I asked him if he wanted to come up still, and he refused still, saying that he needs time.
I take a few steps forward, I can start to feel the breeze. I look back and smile. "Thanks for everything Asriel. I love you, I hope you know that, even if you can't love me back." I say, topping off the sappy goodbye.
He looks shocked. "I..." his face looks very pained, as he tries to force words out. "See you soon, Ash. Goodbye." He speaks up this time.
I bear a toothy grin. "Yeah. See ya soon." I turn around, and run out of the underground, leaving my family, no, my friend behind. I'll be back for you, I promise.
As I step outside, I'm assaulted by an early morning chill.
Over the white tipped mountain range of Ebott, the city of New Providence has a pleasant air to it, it lives on like always, filled with people that have no idea at what happened, and what could have been. Good. A light snowfall punctuates the view with beautiful promise, as the sun rises.
I'm distracted for a moment, but I hear someone yell at me from my right. I look over, my smile fading.
"Put your hands up!" I can hear a voice shout at me. I turn my head to the source, not intimidated. Its a security detail, a small shed is visible from behind him, its door hangs open. The guard points a gun, or maybe a taser at me. He's kind of shaky, maybe because of the cold, maybe because hes intimidated, and for good reason. I remember him, no... I remember killing him, how he faded away to my fire.
Hes not that old, maybe he has four or five years on me, I can see a sweat on his brow, he's nervous, his hands on his weapon, as he points it at me sloppily. I can tell by the yellow tip, that its just a taser. He wields it with little tact, his hands shaking a fair amount.
"So what will you do?" A distant voice echoes through my mind, surprising me at first.
"I'm n-not gonna give you another warning! Hands where I can see them! I don't want to hurt you!" He shouts, I hear him loud and clear.
I curl my fists up instinctively, a fire brewing inside them.
"Will you fight?"
I swallow the feeling in my throat, my fist starts to shake, my eyes closed.
It takes all I am to relinquish my will to fight.
I put my hands above my head.
"Will you run?"
The guard approaches, and gestures me to get on my knees, I swallow my pride and do as he says.
"Or will you face your unfair future, head on?"
The guard holsters his weapon, and fetches a pair of handcuffs. It takes me a moment, but I present my wrists, now I'm the shaking one...
"Treat this world well, do not make the same mistake I did. Goodbye, Ash." The voice clearly says to me, before vanishing completely.
The cuffs enclose on my arms yet again.
I suppress tears, this is no time to cry.
This is my choice, and mine alone.
I may be in shackles again, but I've never felt so free.