Chapter XIII

For Mylia, Saturday morning began just like any other.

Two patients were discharged early in the morning - eager to leave the cold, neutral confines before breakfast came around. The next few hours were spent splitting up the backlog of civilians wishing to give their best regards to her special patient, and the High Summoner by his side. Gifts were placed in the usual spot by his bedside table, and the schedule was quickly flooding with requests.

Yuna had temporarily left for some fresh air and to check up on the Romantique, leaving Mylia to give the young man some company. With her hourly slot fulfilled she had left to check on the queue by the reception desk. What she found weren't curious, chittering visitors, but a silver-haired man clad in decorative green robes, befitting of his status.

"B- Praetor Baralai?"

The New Yevon leader rose from his seat, folding his newspaper and approaching her. "Sorry, I just got here. Are you busy right now?"

"Oh- No, no!" Flustered, Mylia awkwardly bowed in return before saluting one of the most important men in Spira. "Forgive my questioning, Praetor, but what are you doing here?"

"There's no need to apologize; you're doing your job. But if it's not any bother, do you know where a 'Tidus' might be? And is the High Summoner with him?"

"Um, why do you ask?" Mylia asked, the skepticality of his tone sending warning signals her way.

"It concerns his safety and why he is in the hospital at this very moment."

"Ah. Well…" The leverage of mind she had personally developed had withered away under the presence of the influential man. "Lady Yuna isn't here at the moment. But I can page her Commsphere."

"I see. But that wasn't all I asked," he noted with a slight pressuring tone. "I just need to see Tidus specifically."

Mylia struggled to muster up a clear response. Tidus and Yuna were weary with what kind of persons would be allowed into the ward, especially those associated with the factions; they had made her very aware of such suspicions due to the incident.

"Please, Ma'am." Baralai softened his voice and broke eye contact. "All I can say is that this is a state of emergency."

Thoughts crowded her. "I can take you to where he is. But perhaps you're better putting it off until Lady Yuna returns. He's more… lenient when she's around."

"Absolutely," Baralai finished with understanding. "Thank you."

He sat back down, and Mylia contacted Yuna to let her know about the Praetor's appearance. She then quickly went down the hallway and peered through the ward's one-way glass.

Tidus was propped up, exercising his legs over the side of the bed and listening to his music sphere at the same time. He was healed up save for his dominant arm, which was where the poison was focussed.

Mylia supported herself against a wall and fell into a pondering state. As she was doing so, other doctors and nurses gave her confused sideways glances.

'Why's the Praetor here? I know it was an attack, but…' She bore into the rectangular depths of the hallway. 'Lady Yuna? Sir… What's going on?'

She jolted when the cocoon of silence was breached by slamming doors, followed up by Yuna aggressively strutting towards her - and Baralai following suit at a reluctant pace.

"That was quick!" Mylia gasped, taking note of Yuna's reddening cheeks and sheen of sweat.

"Thanks for letting me know-" She paused, giving the one-way glass a hard glare and furrowing her brow. "Mylia, this is serious. Please don't listen in on us this time."

She gave her a firm nod, heading down the adjacent direction and rounding the corner, not daring to look back.

Bevelle Press,

Wednesday, October 2nd, 2 E.C.

An act of assault followed up by an attempted kidnapping had occurred in Luca this Monday. The culprit, identified as official Youth League member 'Rhion of Djose,' was detained by Lucan guards at the back entrance of the Sphere Theater. The crime was discovered by High Summoner Yuna. The victim, Sir Tidus, was transported to the Lucan branch of the New Yevon Health Sanctum for treatment.

Doctors deduced that the victim was paralysed from the shoulders downward. After medical examinations, it was speculated that the culprit had used a crossbow dart containing high-concentrate paralysis poison. Locals expressed outrage due to the alleged political nature of the assault. Youth League founder and leader, Meyvn Nooj, rebuked the claims by disassociating himself with the culprit:

"The morale of my squad is definitely not perfected; there will be rogues whose actions are fueled by their own power trips, such as this man that I will refuse to call one of my brethren. I would like to let everyone know that members such as the perpetrator of the Luca attack do not represent the intentions of the Youth League in any form. Nevertheless I wish Sir Tidus a smooth recovery."

Sir Tidus is still hospitalised, with High Summoner Yuna staying by his side due to wishes of 'protection.' The culprit is currently being held in Luca under an unspecified prison sentence. Interrogations are expected over the following days.

"I'm so comforted by the fact he's that concerned for my well-being." Tidus flung the paper across the room, his deadpan monotone indicating how he truly felt.

"Not convinced?" Baralai replied in a tongue-in-cheek manner.

"No."

"I thought as much," he muttered, peering out of the window. "I wouldn't expect you to."

Tidus leaned back in exhaustion, a sickly feeling pooling within his gut. Just the notion of Nooj creating an alibi felt like an insult to his intelligence. He knew what that man wanted. He knew what he was doing. Yet the people didn't know what was really going on, and that was what mattered.

"I'm glad to see you're getting along well, Tidus." Baralai's soft tone fluttered about them. He pointed to the last paragraph of the article. "But from the sounds of it, that soldier is the one getting the short end."

Of course. Hatred and vitriol was being directed to the wrong person - how Nooj intended in his cowardice. The forces of Tidus' mind compelled him with a want for justice.

"Baralai?" he started, twisting around. "What kind of trial is Rhion getting?"

The Praetor's face slowly sank into a grimace. "...I'm not sure if he'll even have one. The law is kind of muddled in this case."

"In what way?"

"Attacking a legendary guardian is seen as a threat to order, and the consequences are pretty… well- severe. To say the least." Baralai visibly winced. "But it was his choice to attack you. He'll just have to-"

"Nooj gave him orders!" Tidus growled, startling his group. "Why isn't anyone representing him?! Somebody's gotta care, right?"

"That's… really just up to Nooj," Baralai muttered with a disheartened sigh.

"But you said you'd work together. In Luca, remember?" Yuna reminded him.

"I cannot get directly involved with what the League or the Faction decide to do," Baralai countered. "That's the thing with power-sharing, I'm afraid."

Both of them accepted what he was implying with a sad nod. An unwelcome silence stretched out before them. Breaking the awkwardness once again was Tidus suddenly rising to his feet and taking a dominant stance over Baralai. He glared at him with a determined, furious gurn.

"Aren't you angry about all this?"

"What… Well- I never allow myself to. Why?" he responded to the young man with surprisingly little tact, hearing Yuna rising behind them.

"You heard me, right? He's being put in the wrong situation on purpose." Tidus inclined. "Do you think Nooj's giving up just 'cause he can't be bothered to walk the highroad for him? Or is it something else?"

Yuna could sense that Baralai wasn't coming any closer to understanding what he meant. Fortunately she had caught his sly inflections and decided to offer her take on the matter:

"Baralai. I think he's saying that Nooj may be avoiding having to face up, lest his plans get revealed."

All of a sudden his movements stiffened. Both of them could tell that the man had quite the urge to vent, but he swallowed his pride by the bending of his head.

"There's no proof of that, and I'm not going to judge Nooj based off assumptions," he mumbled boldly, earning a disgruntled sigh from Tidus. "Maybe that soldier was a rogue. Maybe he had his own reasons for attacking you."

"But why would I, in particular, be so important to some random crook?"

"Attention? Upsetting the other factions? A bad reflex?" He caught those last words with a hint of guilt. He rubbed his palm against his face wearily, trying to get a hold of himself. "I'm not sure what made him go this far, but unless I get all of the evidence I wouldn't make any pleas."

"You can't even just… make up theories?"

"I did that long ago." He recollected himself to stare at Tidus. "But between Shuyin, the church, the teachings and you, I learned that nothing is ever what it appears to be."

It dawned on Tidus that he was no longer willing to make any more arguments. Each fragment that bubbled from his throat was cut short by a drowsy, acidic feeling in his gut. He exhaled a brash breath and sat back down on the bed, grinding his teeth together.

There were many words in his vocabulary that he could apply to himself, but 'complacent' was not one of them.

There was an analogue clock hanging on the wall, reading an approximated half-past eleven. Each second the red hand would band and tick. Normally the subtle, unremarkable sound was supposed to make the fellow patient feel tranquil, and give them company when they had no visitors.

But now all that noise was doing was pointing out the uncomfortable silence - to be frank it was very irritating. Tidus' patience was waning. If this kept up any longer he would go buck-mad. He knew changing the subject would make him seem dishonest, so how was he supposed to counter Baralai's final statement?

Tick… tick… tick...

'Damn it…' Holding deep contempt for his nagging thoughts, he launched his legs forward. "Goddamn it!"

"Tidus…!" Yuna exclaimed with an exasperated tone, though found herself giggling straight after. "The Praetor is right next to you!"

"S-sorry!" he whispered with hasty submission, unable to escape Baralai's bewildered expression even as he fell back down. "Just- 'S the stress getting to me..."

But the Praetor kept eyeing him, even amidst the recuperating silence. Eventually flustered pinks blotched Tidus' face. Having enough (and wanting to forget that ever happened), he swallowed a thick lump and stared Baralai head-on.

What he saw was not the expected gurn of vile disapproval - far from it, although his brow was furrowed with crinkling skin. When he begun to inhale deeply, Tidus couldn't help but brace himself.

"You're stressed." Baralai's voice was deep and deadpan. "Over this."

And with that, the tension crept back. "O-of course I am. There's no problem with that, right?"

"Regardless of what your opinion of all this is, you're not the one being prosecuted here."

Narrowing his eyes, Tidus silently hoped for the slightest hint of reluctance from Baralai's side. 'Does he think I'm being insensitive?'

"Now…" His face darkened by shadows, Baralai insisted on composing himself before going forward. "I'm not saying that Rhion didn't deserve it. Nobody can deny that what he did was illegal. But for you to say that you're-"

'He is.' He shut his eyes, whistling tired air and tuning out the raised voice. 'Me and my big mouth...'

Needless to say, this was going down a very slippery slope. Tidus quickly sat taut, preparing himself to speak with sentences rather than vague blurbs.

Baralai was not looking at him, however. His silent attention was instead drawn to the other figure on the bed. A wooden creak sounded... followed by the Praetor's eyes bulging until they were showing mostly whites. He cleared his throat and stared at the bedridden man, slightly tense.

"I'm sorry. I know - I just said I shouldn't assume... " Pausing and shifting his gaze towards the woman, Baralai turned away and muttered indecipherable sibilants before rewinding. "Let me try that again. Why are you stressed?"

"Because it's my-"

The phrase escaped Tidus and Yuna's lips in unison. Stalling his thoughts, he allowed her frustrations to air.

"-companion's life being targeted by someone I dared considered a dear friend!" Yuna exploded, her restraint uncharacteristically absent. "He's gone through so much, and you think you can just waltz in here and tell him to get over it after all you did?!"

Baralai winced and sucked in a hasty breath. "But Yuna, it was a personal...!"

All she had to do was play the silent game before he was hanging his head and playing with his thumbs. "Nooj and Gippal invading our island didn't seem very 'personal' to me."

"I just wanted... to be safe about it."

"Coward," she spat. "You can't even put out your own fire."

Hissing out a sigh, she leant back and turned a sullen expression to Tidus' direction. His frightened face was set in stone, his mouth slightly agape. Sputters reverbed down his throat as his eyes darted between the two figures.

The group nearly jumped out of their skin when a hardy force walloped against the door, sending it apart with a pathetic squeak. There in the threshold stood the dreadful nurse, a fist against her waist and her deadly glare aimed at the only other woman.

"First you disregard the rules of the hospital, and now you're harassing the Praetor. Juicy," she smarmed with a malignant grin. "I think that's enough of a scandal to ban you for a very long time."

"Fine. I was just about to go anyway," Yuna seethed, quickly launching herself forward and shooing her off before slamming the door. "Come on, Tidus. We're leaving."

"Ah- Um, I…" He picked up his dysfunctional arm. "But this is my dominant one."

Out of the corner of his eye, Baralai was making intertwining motions with the flick of his wrists. A cocoon of mild yet warm light molded within his palms. He took the limp arm and let the light spill onto it with the consistency of liquid. It transformed into a double helix, wrapping and tightening around the muscle before sinking in. Tidus was shaken by the freshening sensation of his nerves rushing back into place, and at long last the limb was able to flail around like it always did.

"Esuna," Baralai simply said with a smile. "It's a nullifier. Hopefully it'll keep in effect until the poison leaves you."

He thanked him with a sincere giddiness before getting up to stretch. He strolled over to Yuna, who by then had softened considerably due to Baralai's actions. She took a large breather and nodded to herself, looking up at her companion.

"The next time I see that so-called 'Nooj the Undying' in action, I'm not going to be so quiet," she whispered in her usual tone, pressing down on the door handle and checking for any keen listeners. "I'm going to go check out with Mylia. Excuse me, Baralai."

"I'll just get some fresh air, then," Tidus mumbled as she left the room. Pivoting around to Baralai, he made a fanning gesture with his hand and exhaled a relieved breath.

The patio situated at the back of the hospital was a humble spot: a rounded fountain trickling with falling droplets stood above a moat of unused flowerbeds. Vibrant orange-brown leaves, which had broken apart from the blankets of foliage, were sprinkled across the wooden boardwalks and across the rising brick walls.

Leaning his elbows against one of the fences was Tidus, who had changed into a new set of thermal clothes and was listening to the older folks taking their leisurely walks across the area. He drew in a long and relaxed breath spiced with the autumn scent, casually kicking away the unkempt blades of grass that were tickling his ankle.

From behind him the door had slid open, followed by a sensation of added weight to the boards. Turning his head it was clear to see that it belonged to Baralai - slow and reluctant, as usual.

"Sup?" Tidus greeted him with a grin, sidling to the left.

It took him a few seconds before he finally decided to close the distance, mimicking the young man's positioning against the fence. The two of them let nature keep singing for a little while, but Baralai would apply a rag to the beads of sweat present on his brow every now and again.

"Somethin' the matter?" Tidus spoke up, noticing his condition a lot later than he should have.

"No, I'm- I was just a little shaken up back in there," Baralai explained with an airy voice, followed up by a chuckle.

"Ah," he exclaimed with understanding, leaning forward an inch. "Well, you're not alone on that, so - nothing to be ashamed of!"

"She…" Baralai lowered his voice, as if preparing for a retaliation. "...can be something fierce, can't she?"

Propping up his chin with his knuckles, he hummed a melodramatic note. "I guess so, sometimes. It makes me kinda worried for her."

Words were teetering on the edge of his lips, but he audibly gulped them down as they threatened to fall. This time Tidus caught his hesitation immediately, and approached him with a slant of his head.

"You're doing it again."

"I'm sorry…" Baralai muttered, cold breaths hitched and choked in his throat.

"Hey, it's all-"

"For being so foolish, I mean," he reiterated with a jumpy start before hurrying to change the subject. "Nooj has shut himself out from the Council ever since that day, and he's severed all forms of communication from the outside. I need to find a way to negotiate with him. I'm just wondering, Tidus."

He quickly said that last part with a finger raised in Tidus' direction, and pushed himself away from the fence, falling into a glum state of pondering. The young man silently watched him pattering around, back and forth.

"And I promised I wouldn't let New Yevon resort to any more violence. But the longer that Meyvn gets his party riled up..."

As he was mulling, he felt Tidus lightly smack him on his shoulder, wanting only his attention.

"Hey, Baralai," he called out with a firm demeanour. "Let's just all calm down for a sec."

It felt very foreign for him of all people to state that, but regardless he managed to get the Praetor to take in the soothing scenery once more - at least, until he would stop huffing so heavily. He nodded affirmatively to let him know that he was ready.

"First of all, I'm not mad at you." Tidus reassured him with a curled smile.

"You're… So you're not." Baralai's face flinched, looking very taken aback. "W-well, I'm very grateful for that."

"I'm grateful as well," he noted, racking his body against the fence as the tweets of bluebirds fluttered past them. "So don't sweat it! Let's just let that all go for now, okay? Don't think about it. Like, at all."

Out of fear for sounding rude, he stifled the disbelieving laugh that was bubbling up. "What?"

"I'm serious. You're sorry; apology accepted," Tidus said, making a small hammering motion with his fist to emphasise his words. "And that's all that's gonna matter in the long run."

He nodded his head lazily, turning to face the fountain with the speed of a slug. Ironically, contemplating the young man's strange, irresponsible advice had him completely disregard what he was trying to get across.

"I'm not sure how you're able to do it, Tidus," he admitted with a musing tone. "Thinking is one of the principles of our being, isn't it? I can't understand how - being able to 'not think'? I'm afraid I just don't understand."

"See - that's exactly what you shouldn't be doing," he stated vaguely, a shadow of a smug grin creeping up.

"...Care to elaborate?"

"That! Trying to interpret things nobody cares about!" Tidus emphasised with an unintended harshness, doing his best to suppress his arm movements. "Like… Lemme give you an example. Hm…"

He then supported his elbow to cover his mouth with his palm, his eyes downcast and glazed over. Baralai was left to stand there in an awkward silence, his head gyrating in a sort of indecisive shaking motion. "So, now you're-"

"I got it," he said with a snap of his fingers, rising to make eye contact shortly afterwards. "So, you know how sometimes, we wonder what the meaning of life is?"

"Of course we do…? Isn't that something we all want to find out?"

Tidus exhaled softly. "Yeah, but, how do we start to know the meaning? There's nothing to base that 'meaning' on, so where do we even start looking for that answer to the meaning?"

As he was trying desperately to come up with a rebuttal, Baralai felt a dull twinge sparking in the recesses of his otherwise experienced and exercised mind. All that came out in the end was a rather embarrassing-sounding gurgle, before his posture slumped a little from overexertion.

"Just don't. There's no point in even thinking about it. It's a totally pointless question - at least I think so, anyway," Tidus concluded with a shrug, proceeding to wave his hand in front of the Praetor's dazed face. "See what I mean, Baralai? Keep dwelling on answers to that kind of stuff and your brain goes all mushy, and then you're really gonna have problems in all sorts of places."

"I see… I hope I know where you're coming from," he stated, shaking off his stupor by swatting his own cheeks. 'How did we even get to this point?'

"Heck knows, we don't want a brain-dead politician in charge of Spira," Tidus quipped with a cheeky grin, hoping that he'll get some amusement out of the Praetor's reaction.

However, his intentions completely missed the mark and veered into dangerous territory; Baralai's muscles clamped down on the flat piece of the fence, squeezing it tightly, and his breathing fell just short of aggressive spurts. Tidus was confused at first, but when the pieces all fell down together, his capacities for speaking briefly escaped him.

"I… I didn't mean to…"

"Imagine that, won't you?" he chuckled venomously. "What a concept that would be."

"You were possessed too..." Tidus seethed, recalling the facts a moment too late.

"Imagine being aware of yourself, but having someone else in complete control. Someone who wanted nothing more than to make your entire world burn." Baralai swallowed, his fist clenched. "Imagine waking up, your own fingers across the controls of a superweapon. Any longer and the world would have been ashes. Nobody would have known it was the work of that damned unsent. You would have been blamed for it all. It would have been your fault."

His tame outlook was at risk of breaking apart; the urge to yell and scream - to inflict - was increasing at a rate that he was powerless to try and stop. He smacked his palms down on the fence again, looking for any kind of outlet to shed the hatred on when the sounds of footsteps shuffled further away.

Whipping his head towards the direction of the noise, he immediately was plagued with guilt: Tidus' expression read of nothing short but terrified as he widened the gap between them, with his right arm slowly disappearing behind his waist.

What was he thinking just then?

"Baralai… I… I'm sorry."

More beads of sweat dripped from his brow.

"You have nothing to apologize for. You may look like him. Uncannily so. But it is plain to me that you two couldn't be any further apart."

A bated breath fled Tidus' throat, although it sounded like it was done with the slightest ounce of pain. His right arm fell limp again, and he hung his head as he slowly approached his old position, scratching his head along the way. Baralai returned to a more even keel.

"I was lucky. It may have been... well, it was certainly for weeks. It was pure hell, don't get me wrong, but Nooj? He suffered with him for a lot longer. It explains why we fell apart two years ago."

"I- don't know-"

"He's a good man, Tidus. The chancellor is seeing red, though." he suddenly stated with a lighter inflection. "He's not going to tell the judiciary to go easy on that soldier, if he'll even give him a chance."

Moments passed by when Baralai caught wind of his sixth sense. Pairs of curious eyes, from both the few remaining patients on the patio and from the other side of the building's windows were latched onto the two men. He gave them a quick hand-wave before relocating them closer to the brick walls. By then the intruders had gotten the message and were carrying on with their own business.

"Are you okay?" he said to Tidus, whose innocent personality seemed to be snatched away.

"Yeah, it's… It's funny Shuyin slips in again," he grumbled, crossing his arms and leaning backwards. "I'm just as confused about him as you are, you know."

"You two aren't related?"

"Well… no. But maybe he is? Like from a distant time, in another place?" As expected, Baralai's face twisted up with the nonsense coming out of his mouth. "Yeah - exactly. That's just how I feel."

"Maybe the Gullwings can piece it together. They proved invaluable when it came to figuring out Shuyin's motives with Vegnagun. I'm sure they could dig some-"

"About that. They're defunct," Tidus dismissed his thoughts with sharp pronunciation. "It's just me and Yuna on a little boat cruise now. Maybe holding out for a lead, but we're not sure where to begin."

"I… see." He would have to ask her about those nitty little details later. "Perhaps you could do with a bit more focus. Let's figure out what your first objective could be."

"If I'm alive or dead would be a good place to-"

In trying to make his motor stop, he ended up with his cheeks slightly puffed out. Just as quickly as he released that cursed breath, he sucked in another one.

"That was a joke!" he blurted with unrelenting speed. "Heh. That was funny, right? Right?"

"If I recall correctly, I was at the head of a rather conspicuous trial determining that." Baralai shook his head in bewilderment. Trying to understand Tidus proved almost impossible.

"Oh… Oh." Whatever measures his mind was taking to suppress all memories of that incident were certainly beginning to work. "Um. If we can put behind the whole 'execution' thing Nooj was threatening me with…"

"Of course."

"Did anything come out of that?" he asked, greatly lowering his voice into a raspy whisper. "The ghosts scared me off before I could hear it."

At once, Baralai's eyes darkened and he began to cluck his tongue, thinking of the exact phrase he had to use to make sense of the situation. Tidus waited patiently - a rare occurrence. He lolled his head against the spherical monument on the wall, staring up at the luscious blue sky when sprinkles of pastel colours caught his eye.

'Pyreflies?' He watched them bob up and down, migrating to the south-west. 'Weird.'

"To put it in the most human language, Tidus…" Baralai started, rubbing along his lower face with exhausted eyelids. "Your state is a phenomenon. The likes of which have never seen a book of records."

The loft picked up with a burst of force, perfectly encapsulating the mood. Tidus tightly clasped his hands together and held them to his churning stomach. "S-should I be proud of that?"

"If you consider black pyrefly patterns in your aura to be a novelty."

"What does it mean?" A sobering memory flooded his mind, once relayed by Bahamut as he lay passed out at the base of Mount Gagazet. The dream…Tidus held out his hands, his lax fingers curled up. 'Was it because I was a projection made real? Did this come on when I returned, or did I always have them?'

"However you did pass the test, as we're proving right now," Baralai reassured him, trying to bring a light into this whole catastrophe. "You're not going to break apart near a pyrefly mass, so we know for sure you're not dead."

Either he didn't want to respond, or that not-so-secret revelation wasn't making him feel any better.

"But just to be safe, Tidus, I suggest you keep away from those Farplane entrances in Guadosalam and the cloisters," he muttered with a shifty cycle of his eyes. "Because… I remember that display in Bevelle. Something is not right with you."

"I...noticed." Tidus trailed off as his thoughts turned to Yuna, and the prospect of breaking her heart once more. 'What if I'm still a dream? Or worse?'

"Do you, uh, want to go back in?" he suggested to the young man, his heart heavy and aching. "Maybe Yuna's finished checking out."

Dryly swallowing a lump, he raised his head and nodded, holding up a single finger between them. "Just between us, okay?"

"I promise."

Just before his final smile faded, and before his form twisted around to make a dash back into the hospital, Baralai processed the sight of a thin, shimmering tear rolling down his cheek, and then made his chair on the wall.

'I'm sorry.'