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"Brooke…" Holly said walking into her sister's room "Brooke where are you?"

"In here Hols" she heard a voice call from the bathroom, Holly walked in excepting to see an upset Brooke but was surprised to see her, well cleaning, now Holly was defiantly worried "Umm… Brooke what are you doing?"

"Well I spilled some of my make up on the counter so I was trying to clean it up, but then I realized how messy this counter really was so I thought I would clean the counter but if I clean the counter I guess I should clean the whole bathroom huh?" Brooke said talking a mile a minute.

"Brooke you hate cleaning, you only clean when you are upset. You do it so you don't let your emotions get to you." Holly sighed cleaning up against the door frame as she watched her sister.

"Upset? Why would I be upset?" Brooke asked not looking up at her sister.

"Brooke…"

"You know I should probably go get some paper towels." Brooke said standing up still not looking at her sister. Brooke knew if she looked at holly she would probably cry and she didn't want to cry over something as stupid as Lucas kissing some girl; some girl who is his girlfriend.

"Brooke" Holly said again as her sister went to pass her "Brooke!" she yelled grabbing her "What is wrong with you?"

Brooke stood there trying to control her emotions before whispering "Why did he kiss her Hols? He said he loved me and he kissed her; he kissed her like that."

"Brooke who are you talking about?" and just like that night 4 years ago Brooke looks up at her baby sister and whispers;

"Lucas."

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Lucas was sitting there getting impatient; he wanted Emma to hurry up with her plan or whatever so she could see Brooke. He hadn't really talked to her since this morning and not only was that driving him nuts; the look on her face was killing him.

"Oh crap." Emma says jumping up from the hot tub.

"Baby what's wrong?"Nick asked his girlfriend.

"I think I forgot my shoes on the beach, I am going to go get them."

"Emma its getting dark why don't I go with you." Nick suggested.

"No its fine, Rachel, Katy and Summer will come with me."

"We will?" all three girls said at the same time.

"Yes, you all will." Emma said looking at Rachel then at Lucas real quick.

"Oh right, we will come." Rachel said getting the hint an also getting out of the hot tub and grabbing a towel.

"Ugh I guess I will come, I don't really want to stay with the guys, and their guy talk alone." Summer said getting out with her best friends. "Come on Katy."

"I don't know, I mean they're not my shoes." Katy shrugged.

"Yeah but do you really want to be stuck with us guys?" Lucas asked growing annoyed that she won't go.

"I don't mind; I mean I am with you not the guys." She smiled leaning over and kissing him.

"Yeah but maybe this little walk on the beach will make us all the best of friends," Rachel said sarcastically getting a smack by Emma.

"No but really four girls is better than three and we can let the guys have some guy time." Emma smiled.

"Fine, well if I am going why don't I get Brooke and Holly." Katy said getting out of the hot tub and head to the house.

"No!" Emma, Rachel and Lucas all said at the same time.

"Why?" Katy asked turning to face them crossing her arms over her chest.

"Because umm…" Emma said thinking of what to say.

"Well we know Brooke." Lucas shrugged.

"Yeah and she seemed upset, so if she is upset you don't want to be on the other side of that trust me." Rachel explained.

"Fine whatever." Katy agreed as the girls headed towards the beach and Emma gave Lucas a wink. Lucas figured he would wait a few minutes before heading up to Brooke's room.

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"I can't believe it." Holly said after Brooke explained everything that happened to them. "Well I guess I can believe it, I mean you are Brooke and Lucas, me and mom actually had a bet the whole time you two were friends about this, I guess I never thought ya'll would..Umm…now." Holly explained.

"Yeah me neither." Brooke said with a dry laugh.

"I guess that explains why you ran off earlier huh?"

"Yeah I must have looked so dumb, I just…I guess I realized how much I love him Hols and that really is scaring the hell out of me." Brooke said as tears started to escape her eyes.

"Brooke…" Holly said pulling her sister into a hug "It's going to be ok" She soothed as she rubbed her sister's back "But can I ask you something?" she asked as Brooke nodded her head and Holly pulled out of their hug. "Why is loving him so much such a bad thing?" she asked wiping her sister's tears.

"Because if I love him this much, it means he can break me." Brooke explained knowing her sister understood what she meant, Holly was about to say something when she heard a knock.

"Brooke…" the girls heard a knock at the door as the both turned to see Lucas standing there. Holly wiped the tear off her sister's face before Lucas could seem them and eased off the bed.

"I'm going to head downstairs, let you two talk." She said looking at both of them "Come find me if you need me?" Holly said towards Brooke and Brooke just smiled and nodded, as Holly turned and left shutting the door behind her.

"What's up?" Brooke asked in her fake cheery tone not wanting Lucas to see she was upset.

"I…umm.. Wanted to check on you." He explained as he slowly made his way over to her sitting next to her on the bed.

"No need I am fine." She smiled, but her body tensed when he took her hand in his. He noticed how she acted to his touch and it made him nervous, hoping what happened with Katy didn't mess things up with them, but a part of him knew it did.

"You sure, because…" he started but stopped when she shook head hand waving her hand at him.

"Luke everything is fine I promise." She smiled. "You don't need to worry ok?"

Lucas just nodded, knowing she was lying but knowing better then to push Brooke to talk about something when she didn't want too. "I missed you today." He whispered.

"I missed you too." She whispered back, he leaned into kiss her but his heart sank when she pulled back from him.

"Brooke…" he sighed reaching up and rubbing her cheek with his thumb.

"Lucas please don't." she whispered closing her eyes not wanting to look at him and not wanting him to touch her right now knowing if he did would get upset again.

"Why?" he asked slightly upset she was being like this "Why won't you let me touch you? Why won't you let me kiss you?"

Brooke opened her eyes looking at him furring her brow and shaking her head at him "Why?" she asked in a pissed off tone like it wasn't the most obvious thing ever.

"Yes why? Why are you being like this and why every time I get near you are you tensing up or jump? Why Brooke what is wrong?"

She turned her head looking up at the ceiling not wanting to cry again as she took a deep breath "I don't maybe because all of 5 minutes ago Katy's tongue was down your throat." She hissed getting off her bed walking over to the window staring out. She heard him let out a sigh and ease off the bed over towards her and spinning her around to face him.

"Brooke she kissed me, I was about to pull away when you came out I swear." Brooke didn't speak just looked at him knowing if she spoke her voice would crack and she would most likely cry and she really, really didn't want to cry again. "You have to believe me." Brooke just again walked away from him. "Brooke, god what do you want me to do? She thinks we are together, all because you asked me to not tell her and break up with her." he yelled at her growing more than annoyed now.

"Your right Lucas this is all my fault!" she yelled back "You don't think I know that! You don't think I know she is your girlfriend even if you don't want to be with her. I know we slept together last night and I know you said you love me, but that doesn't mean seeing her kiss you; girlfriend or not doesn't hurt because it hurts like hell! " She cried, tried her best but it was no use the tears came and she couldn't stop them no matter how bad she wanted them too.

"Brooke…" He sighed knowing he hurt her. His heart broke he felt terrible that she was so upset about this, he did love her, he meant it last night but when he was about to tell her that she started again "Maybe…maybe this was a mistake." She whispered not looking up at him.

"What?" he asked, he prayed he misunderstood her, he prayed she didn't say it was a mistake.

"Maybe we just went too fast."

"Brooke…" he sighed walking over to her taking her hand "You don't mean that," But she wouldn't answer just looked at the ground "Baby come on stop this please." He begged but again she wouldn't say anything "This is not a mistake."

"I think it was," she finally spoke but still didn't look up at him. He let go of her hand and ran his hand through his hair trying to process all that was happening.

"Why you doing this?" he finally asked her, not in angry tone but in a hurt confused voice.

Why am I doing this? That's the question, the answer is because I realized how one person could completely break me, how one person has the power to make me feel so terrible inside and make me feel like my world is crashing around me. Maybe because I love you so much that my heart is crushed by the thought of you with anyone else. Or maybe because I want to end it with you before you end it with me. That was the truth; that's how she felt but she couldn't tell him that. So she just whispered "I don't know."

"Then don't do it, I love you, I want to be with you not Katy not anyone else. God don't you see that, don't you see how much you mean to me?" he asked as she again started to cry "Please don't cry, god please stop…" he said wiping her tears "Talk to me please. Baby you know you can talk to me, so please just tell me what you are feeling please." He begged.

"I think you should just stay with Katy, see how you feel for her." she whispered as her voice cracked at the end.

"Damn it Brooke don't you get it, I don't need to know how I feel about her; that kiss meant nothing, I felt nothing."

"It didn't look like nothing."

"Maybe because she felt something, but I sure as hell didn't. She never makes me feel or made me feel how you make me feel; even before you came back she didn't make me feel like you did. I thought about that what happened before you left every day. I wanted to call you tell you how I felt and how I missed you every day. No matter what girl I was with or what we were doing did they ever once compare to how I felt or feel about you, you have to believe that. God you have too." He was begging with her, pleading for her to understand how much he cared for her how much he needed her with him.

"Lucas…" she sighed looking up at him but he didn't let her speak as he just pulled her into him and kissed her. He felt her fight it at first but then give into it h slowly pulled away smiling at her "See that's how it is suppose to feel when you kiss someone, tell me you don't feel it Brooke?"

"Lucas…I…" she didn't know what to say of course she felt it she loved him but that didn't change the fact she was scared, of him the way he made her feel.

"Brooke…"

"Umm...its late Lucas, we should just talk about this tomorrow." Brooke whispered not wanting to talk about this not right now anyway...

"I don't want to talk about this tomorrow I want to talk about it tonight, right now." He knew Brooke; he knew that if he waited until tomorrow she would put it off and act like nothing happened. He knew if he didn't talk to her about this now odds were high he would lose her and he didn't want to lose her.

"Lucas please, I promise we will talk, ok I promise." She knew he knew her well enough that she would try to put it off as long as she could, but she was tired she didn't want to fight about it she just wanted to sleep and try to go the rest of the night without thinking of him and Katy together.

"Fine." He said feeling defeated. "But we are going to talk Brooke; I am not going to lose you." Brooke just nodded as he wiped the remaining tears off her face "I love you Brooke." He said leaning in giving her a light kiss on the cheek,and turned walking out of her room shutting the door behind him. Brooke rolled into her bed pulling the covers tight around her as tears started to fall again then looked over at the door as she thought of Lucas and whispered;

"I love you too."


A/N:Ok there is your chapter you know what to do, review :))