They didn't get much sleep.
They both dozed off every few hours only to wake up pressed against one another in the dark, groping sleepily with tired limbs and sharing lazy kisses under the covers. At one point, Beth thought she was dreaming. The feel of him - against her, on top of her, inside her - it made her euphoric.
When the sun woke her around seven the next morning, she found herself sprawled across his torso, still naked and comfortably warm. She wanted to make him breakfast, but even that took a ridiculous amount of concentration due to Daryl's constant distractions. He ended up taking her right there bent over the kitchen table, and she wasn't even upset about burning the food. They ate it anyway, and if they cared any less, they would've kept repeating the same pattern, never leaving the house. But they did care, and Daryl had a job to do. They all had jobs to do.
Deanna had assigned them to everyone, but Aaron had handpicked Daryl as his new recruiter in place of his partner, Eric. Beth didn't have a job yet. She wanted one, but she was afraid of what she might get tossed into. She didn't want to be stuck in the kitchen or in charge of daycare. Sure, she hadn't minded stepping into that role when they were at the jail, but things felt different now. She wasn't that girl anymore. Beth wanted to be useful. She wanted to help protect their new home.
Rick called a meeting later that morning to discuss everyone's new roles. Maggie was going to serve as Deanna's apprentice, Glenn and Noah joined the group that made supply runs, Sasha was appointed to keep watch at one of the towers, and many of the rest filled in the gaps around town with various duties. Rick, Michonne, and Beth were strategically left out. As the others dispersed, Rick addressed Michonne. Daryl and Beth lingered behind.
"Deanna hasn't mentioned anything to us about what our jobs will be yet," Rick said, "but when she does, we should be willing to help. We need to make it look like we're settling in."
"We ain't gotta make it look like anything," Daryl cut in. "We should try."
Rick lowered his head. "I want the others to try. But we need to stay sharp, just in case."
Michonne nodded curtly and stood up. "I get it. I do." Then she left.
Beth got it too, but she didn't say anything. She knew Rick was only trying to keep his family safe. After everything they'd been through, he couldn't risk losing anyone else because he might have felt safe when he shouldn't have.
"What about her?" Daryl asked Rick.
He'd been referring to Beth, so she hovered patiently at Daryl's side as Rick waited for Michonne to be out of earshot. Then he spoke.
"I have my own job for you, Beth," he said. "And it might not be exactly what you were thinking."
"What is it?" she asked.
"I need you to play your innocent card." Rick swallowed hard. "I know you can fight. I've seen you out there. You're a lot stronger than everyone thinks, and I need you to keep it that way. At least for now."
"What does that mean?" Daryl questioned haughtily.
"It means, just pretend that you're not good with a gun. Keep watching over Judith. Make them think you're not watching."
Beth clicked her tongue apathetically. "You want me to be a spy."
"More or less."
Daryl stepped away and paced across the room. Rick's home was a mirror image of the one Beth and Daryl shared, given that everything was placed oppositely within the space. Daryl placed his hands flat down on the kitchen counter and hung his head. He stayed that way while Beth considered her options, then she came to a decision.
"Okay," she agreed. "I can do that."
Daryl's head jerked upward. "What?"
"It's fine. I can do it." She looked to Rick. "You're right, they won't even notice me."
She locked her eyes on the discontent in Daryl's face until she forced it to fade away. He sighed and straightened.
"Fine," he said, stepping just in front of her. He leaned in close, not giving a second thought to Rick watching their every move, and cupped her cheek in his hand. "But the second you hear or see anything that don't sit right," he added, "you tell me. Don't be brave."
She blinked and gave him a slow smile. "Okay."
"Alright," Rick let out. "It's settled."
""⧫""
She tried to suck it up and play house, but the dullness was wearing on her.
Beth loved Judith. She loved playing with her and keeping her fed and tucking her in at naptime, but she knew that time could be spent doing better things. She knew that Rick had assigned her for baby duty partly because he didn't trust anyone else to do it, but what about Carl? They could take turns. Beth wanted to be on the wall. She wanted to kill walkers and keep an eye on the perimeter. Daryl had taught her how to track and hunt when they were alone, so even being part of the scouting crew would be better than cleaning spit-up all day.
Nonetheless, she tried. She sat in Rick's house, rocking Judith to sleep and staring out the window for six days before finally giving in and doing something. If Rick wanted her to be a spy, she sure as hell wasn't going to sit around waiting for something suspicious to fall into her lap. So, she chose to be active.
Sasha and Tyreese were walking past the house on their way back from gate duty when Beth got their attention. They both came over, guns resting across their shoulders and heads held high.
Tyreese greeted her first. "Hey, Beth. What's up?"
"Can you maybe watch Judith for a little bit?" she asked. "I've been meaning to grab some things from the supply pantry but haven't had time."
Sasha relaxed her stance. "Yeah, sure. We don't mind." She ascended the steps of the porch and traded her rifle for the baby.
"I'll be back in twenty minutes tops," Beth assured her. "She just woke up from a nap so she's just looking for someone to play with."
"We can definitely do that," Tyreese said, grinning and taking Judith's little fist as she waved it at him. "Take your time."
Beth nodded and hurried across the street.
Olivia was in charge of checking out supplies from the pantry. She also kept a close watch on all the guns that were locked up just on the other side of the door. Beth had only spoken with Olivia once before, but she figured she could get by with some casual small talk. Rick had mentioned needing to keep their guns on them, but Deanna had insisted on having them checked in the moment they'd arrived. If Beth could get a hold of some handguns, it might make Rick feel better. And it would certainly prove she was useful.
"Hello," Olivia greeted her as she walked through the door. "You're Beth, right?"
Beth nodded innocently. "And you're Olivia."
"Nice to officially meet you." The woman extended her hand and Beth took it shyly. "You need to load up on some things?"
"I do actually," Beth concurred. She began rummaging through the shelves, picking up a box of noodles and a can of tomato sauce.
"Making spaghetti?" Olivia assumed.
"Maybe. Daryl said he had some his first night here, and I can't stop thinking about it."
Olivia tossed her a smaller box with angel hair pasta inside. "Take this instead. I've been hiding it for myself, because there's only the one, but you should have it."
Beth clutched the box to her chest. "Thanks."
"I've seen you two together," Olivia noted, then clarified, "you and Daryl. He really looks out for you, doesn't he?"
"Yeah, he does. I wouldn't have made it without him. It was just me and him for a while, and he taught me a lot." She wasn't lying, but she could feel the start of tall tale slipping from her lips. "I didn't even know how to use a gun. I'm still not great at it, but I know he'll protect me."
Olivia smiled. "That's nice. I wish I had that."
"You've got a whole town full of people. I'm sure at least one of them cares enough."
"Not like that. You've got something special with that guy. You're lucky. To find that in all of this." She gestured around the room as if to say the shelves were hiding walkers ready to leap out and attack. "It's rare you get to start over after losing everything."
Beth chewed nervously at her bottom lip. She didn't want to tell her it was going to be okay. She couldn't know that. Beth didn't know if Olivia would ever find someone like Daryl to look out for her, but she did know that Olivia probably didn't need to. In this world, in order to survive, you have to take care of yourself. Beth knew she was strong, and just because Daryl was there, it didn't mean she couldn't make it without him. She didn't want to, but she could. If she had to.
"I'm sorry," Olivia apologized. "I don't mean to bring down the mood. I'm glad your group made it here safely. I hope you can learn to call it home."
Beth nodded once and pressed her lips into a small grin. "Thank you."
"Feel free to look around and see if anything else catches your eye. I'll be in the armory."
This was her chance. She needed to bring up something girlish and naive about weapons.
But what could she say?
"You guys must have a lot of guns to need an armory."
Olivia frowned. "We like to have them, but we hope we won't need them."
"So they're just in there?" Beth gestured to the door. "For anyone to use?"
"Well, sort of."
Olivia unlocked the handle and opened it just enough that Beth could see a crack of light coming through a window on the other side. Beth faked a look of concern and Olivia caught it, believing in it wholeheartedly.
"Don't worry," she said. "You're still safe. If someone needs to go outside the walls, they come here to check out a gun from me. And when I'm not here, it stays locked up tight."
Beth sighed in relief. "Oh. Okay."
They both heard the other door open suddenly, and Beth saw a man named Tobin walk in from outside.
"Hello, ladies," he greeted them. He stepped past Beth and made a beeline for the room of guns. "I need to check out some rifles, Olivia. We're going to the construction site to pick up some more parts for the expansion."
"Sure thing." Olivia stepped aside and let him in, along with Abraham and another man Beth didn't know.
Beth waited until they were completely pulled into deep conversation, then she tiptoed across the room to get a better view. She saw a wall lined with automatic weapons and few smaller handguns. She saw a crate spilling over with boxes of ammunition and two small tubs of flares and smoke bombs. They were fully loaded, no doubting that. Surely they wouldn't miss one or two firearms missing from the vault, if she was really clever about it.
She decided that instead of being sneaky, she could be bold. She could casually enter the room, look out of place and start asking lots of stupid questions, and maybe they wouldn't really notice her slip something into her bag. Before she could make a decision about her next move, however, Tobin ushered her forward.
"You ain't scared of guns are ya?" he asked. "You don't gotta linger outside the door like that. You can come in."
Beth chuckled and took one step past the door. "Wow," she sighed. "I wouldn't know where to start."
Abraham gave her a look, but she purposefully avoided his eyes.
"If you ever want someone to show you how to fire one," Tobin suggested, "just let me know."
"Thanks, but I've got Daryl to show me."
The other man turned his head to look her up and down. He was tall and broad. Even standing between Abraham and Tobin, he looked like a giant. "That's right," he realized aloud. "You're the archer's wife."
Beth's throat closed involuntarily. Then she stuttered, "Umm, yes. I-I'm Beth."
"It's a pleasure, Beth." Tobin grinned and eased some of the tension. "This is my right hand man, David."
"You're married?" Olivia questioned. "Did you know each other before?"
Beth shook her head.
"Neither did me and Betsy," David said. "Now I wouldn't trade having her in my life for anything that came before the world went to hell."
"That's really sweet," Beth let out softly.
Olivia murmured a satisfied hum then led the men out of the armory with their desired weapons. Even though Abraham gave her a subtle nod, no one thought twice about leaving Beth to be the last one out. And they definitely didn't notice when she slipped three handguns and a box of ammo into the bottom of her bag. She covered the evidence with two cans of mixed vegetables and a can opener.
As Beth exited the house, she made sure to thank Olivia again for the pasta.
""⧫""
"Where the hell did you get this?" Daryl demanded, raising his voice in a way she wasn't quite used to.
Beth hadn't heard him speak to her in that tone since their shouting match outside the moonshine shack. That was before everything had happened. Before everything between them had changed. But the way he was looking at her now, one would think she'd robbed a bank. Pre-apocalypse, of course.
"I swiped it from the armory," she admitted casually. "No one noticed."
"But why?" he dared.
She shook her head, dumbfounded. "You heard Rick. I was just doing what he wanted. I'm keeping an eye on things." Daryl nearly cut in, but she added one more thing before he could. "We need guns to protect ourselves. If something happens, we'll need them."
"What do you think's gonna happen, Beth?"
"Nothing." She bit her lip and moved to stand behind the counter. She didn't do it to create a shield between them - she knew he wouldn't hurt her - but she needed the space. "You saw what Terminus was," she said, filling a ceramic bowl with water from the sink.
Daryl took note of where she'd placed herself in the room and stepped back. He sat at the kitchen table and slammed the gun forcefully down on the surface to let out some of his frustration in a way that wasn't towards her. Beth couldn't stop the reflexive flinch that resulted from the sound, despite knowing Daryl had removed the clip.
"I don't get it," he mumbled. Then he cleared his throat and spoke again, more calmly. "You're the one that told me to believe in this place. Now what? You've changed your mind?"
"No," she discouraged. "I just... " She fought back a surge of guilt. "I just wanted to do somethin'."
He got up and paced. She knew well enough by now that this was Daryl's way of rationing out his thoughts before they came spewing out across the floor in a heap of nonsense and rage. Sometimes even the patterns of his steps weren't enough to clear his head, though. So, it took lashing out and reeling himself back in before he was calm enough to state the truth.
It was getting easier for him to jump ahead to the end of that routine nowadays. Beth normally didn't let him waste time with bullshit. She called him on it, and he appreciated it. Now, however, he was really mad at her. No. Not mad. He was disappointed.
"I didn't do anything wrong," she stated clearly, regaining an ounce of her nerve. "And I'm not sayin' we shouldn't believe in this place. I just don't wanna sit around anymore. I agree that maybe Rick is being a little extreme, but when he gave me this job, it made me feel good. Even if it means pretending with everyone else, at least someone knows I'm capable of more."
Daryl stared at her hard. His brows knitted together in confusion but relaxed again almost immediately after registering the look of desperation on Beth's face. He understood.
"Beth," he let out, moving forward. "I know what you're capable of."
"That's different. It's you."
He scoffed. "Then what is it?"
She thought on it for a moment. In the time it took her to close her eyes and breathe, Daryl had come close enough that he was hovering over her. Not in a menacing way, but like a shadow. Like a quiet protector.
"When I was in the armory," she said, "this guy, David, assumed we were married. I didn't say anythin', because I'm tired of everyone lookin' at me like I'm a little girl." She lifted her eyes and met his. They were calm and collected. They were listening. "I don't know how old I am - I stopped marking the days after we had to leave the jail - but I know how I feel. And I know that I'm stronger than what they see on the outside."
Daryl voice broke. "Yeah. You are."
He pulled her to his chest, squeezing every last drop of doubt out of her. He threaded his fingers through her hair on either side of her face and took her in. She watched his eyes scan over her mouth and her nose. They searched her eyes and she allowed him to see her.
"I ain't mad," he admitted, clearing her conscience. "I just wish you woulda told me. If they caught you - "
"They didn't," she forced.
He chewed his lip nervously. "I guess it's alright," he noted. "You know, if you tell people we're married. Makes sense."
"That's it?" she teased.
"What? It ain't like Glenn and Maggie made some big deal about it."
Beth shrugged and pulled away nonchalantly. "You're right," she commended. She picked up the box of angel hair pasta from the counter and poured it into the bowl of water she'd already prepared. "But I at least need a ring."