[Chang Du, China, Shu estate. Guan Suo's room.]

"Little brother!"

Guan Suo woke up to see his big sister Guan Yin Ping sitting on the frame of his window. He shrieked and hid under his blanket. Her foot steps made the wood floor creek like banchees. She lifted the blanket off of him!

"Ahhhhh! Help! My dead sister is haunting me!" He cried out to whomever could have heard.

"I'm not going to hurt you! Suo! Why would I hurt my brother?" Yin Ping's red eyes flashed in the darkness.

"I haven't seen you in a long time... What happened?" His heart rate started to go back to normal.

"I became a vampire." She said sitting on the foot of his bed.

"A vampire?" Suo was clueless.

Bao Sanniang rushed in with her chainsaw yo-yo in hand. "Suo! Why did you call for help when it's only your sister?"

"My sister is a vampire! Sanniang!" He cried frightened damsel.

"A vampire?"

"Hi! Sanniang!" Yin Ping waved at her.

"How did you become a vampire? Yin Ping?" She took a closer look at the dark haired girl.

"It was after father died. I was stolen away by a vampire from Wu. He did horrible things to me and in the end I put a spear through his heart... Then a vampire couple gave me sanctuary... I decided to come back and see you all again." She explained without care.

"My poor sister." Suo hugged his undead sister.

"What is going on here? Suo?" Guan Xing came in with Zhang Bao.

"Our sister has returned!" Suo jumped into his brother's arms.

"Why doe's she look dead?" Zhang Bao exclaimed with an arm on Guan Xing's shoulder.

Liu Shan and Xing Cai were the last to answer the call, "What is going on here? Guan Suo?"

"Lord Liu Shan! It was nothing!" Guan Suo assured Liu Shan with a fake smile.

"I'm a vampire." Guan Yin Ping did the peace sign.

Liu Shan almost looks into the Guan girl's red eyes but Xing Cai grabs his attention, "Shall we have an other banquet? Liu Shan?"

"Yes,"

A out of the window a purple light grabs the attention of the descendants.

"What is going on outside?"

Below they see Jiang Wei chanting a spell. From the ground raises zombies. "Raise up! My army of undeath!"

"What the f#ck is he doing?" Guan Xing had mosiac put over his mouth.

"That awful smell is bothering me kitty senses!" Growled Bao Sanniang smothering Suos arm.

"Has Wei gone completely nuts?" Xing Cai stated the obvious.

"Seems so." Liu Shan covered his mouth.

"ZOMBIES!" Cried Yin Ping.

"Zombies? Why are we standing around here doing nothing!? We have to stop Jiang Wei..." Zhang Bao aimed for the door.

Xing Cai stopped him, "Jiang Wei wants to take over China by using zombies... It seems."

"We have to stop him! As you said sis! This is crazy!"

"I guess the Sima bros were right about Jiang Wei... He's insane!" Liu Shan claimed as the zombie of Liu Bei raised from the ground by the protege's command. "My asshole of a father! I will put him back in the ground... A second time!" Liu Shan grabbed his rapier and kicked the door open with his foot and walked out like a badass.

Xing Cai cheered with her hands to the sky and followed after him, "YES."

"Is that daddy? Down there? Sis?" Suo asked Yin Ping in an innocent sibling manner.

"He raised all three it seems... Even Zhuge Liang and Zhao Yun." She peered out with her superior eyes. "Let's go with Lord Liu Shan and Xing Cai."

[Liu Bei was an asshole father... A well deserved ooc moment for Liu Shan.]

The two vampires made out in the dark shade against the wooden column of the pavilion. A cancurous laugh came from behind them. It was Sima Zhao. Up after his third nap of the day.

"Hahah! You two are a cute couple!"

"Zhao, Don't be so loud..." Jia Chong broke away from the vampire bride.

"No, Please don't stop for me." He chuckled stepping down the stairs into the gardens.

Wang Yuanji read a book from the canopy gazibo over the garden pond. He figured Yuanji liked the book because she was laughing and smiling. Zhao sat next to her and looked over at what she was reading. "What are you reading? Yuanji?"

She flipped out of focus and the book fell into the water. The book slowly drowned to the dirt bottom of the murky pond.

"Should I get my brother to fish it out?" Zhao asked the small woman.

"No, He went out tonight... By himself." She said frankly. "Why don't you get it for me?"

Zhao wouldn't, "I don't know what lives in there... We can get Jia Chong to fish it out." He has total resistance to disease, microbes, and poison.

"He can't pass flowing water." She stated fact.

"A pond sits in place, Yuanji." Zhao examined the body of water.

"Ugh, Go get Jia Chong."

Refusing to get up. Zhao hollered out to Jia Chong, "Jia Chong! Yuanji needs you to get her book out from the pond!"

Jia Chong turned his head and complied with his wishes, "I will be there soon."

Chong entered the garden with his companion. He alone began to strip down to his underwear and changed to a personally designed swimming trunks. He stood on a rock, putting on a custom pair of black and teal goggles and dived into the pond.

After ten minutes of Chong not resurfacing. Zhao began to get worried, "Did he meet Aqua Man down there? What is taking him so long?"

"Another world must be down there..." Qi remarked sarastically.

"Yeah, A junk yard of all the crap my father threw in the water." Zhao retorted to Fang.

"I didn't want to see that." Yuanji grunted.

Zhao hugs Yuanji with his arm, "Me neither."

Abruptly Jia Chong sprang out from the water. He had several things in his arms including the book.

"What did you find Chong?"

"I found these gloves and this fan. A baby toy and the book." He gave Zhao everything.

"These are my father's... My toy... I was wondering what happened to it." The toy looked like a decrepit Teddy. "Who threw my Baozi into the pond?"

"Probably your brother."

"Yeah, He would do that..."

"I will make you a bath, Master." Qi said taking the goggles of his face.

Sima Shi sat down in a chair. He was in a dark room with drapes on the four arches of the square. The foggy incense almost made him cough. In front of him a circular table with a cloth that had many different symbols. A shimmering globe was placed on the table by two hands with long artfully done nails.

"Why have you come to my shop?" Asked the voice of a witch.

"I came here to ask if you could preform a ritual." He muttered.

"What kind of spell?"

"You are connected to the mystic realm? Are you not? I want you to resurrect my father." Shi couldn't believe he was asking this. He really didn't want to bring back his father but the current situation demanded it.

The witch cackled "I thought by that sorrowful look on your face you came here for a love potion or a voodoo doll... Why should I resurrect him?"

"Werehorses."

"Werehorses?"

"First it was the vampires... We haven't had problems with werehorses since Tong Gate it seems... Now they are causing problems... Turning people into savage werehorses in the country side now they threaten to enter the cities." Sima Shi gazed into the globe and saw miniature people moving.

"He holds some secret knowledge in stopping these werehorses from grazing the lands of China?"

"Yes,"

"Don't tell me... Just pay me and I will do it... 1,000 gold." With that he dropped a large pouch of gold on the cloth of the table.

"Here."

"Let's get to business, Shall we?"

Zhao walked down the pavilion and into Jia Chong's quarters. He held Jia Chong's clothes in hand. "Chong, You forgot your clothes."

He entered his bath room and gently placed his clothes on the end table. Without much care for looking around.

Zhao closed the door after he left. The Sima stopped , opened the door and peeked in, "Are you okay in there? Jia Chong?"

"Yes. I am fine, Zhao." He said paitently in the blood filled tub.

"Oooh, So that is what you use the peon blood for... I'm going now." Zhao slowly closed the door. The blood of warriors makes another warrior even stronger.

From the blood waters emerged the nude and bloody Qi. "He's gone?" She gazed to the door with a band poster.

"Finally," He remarked.

The door opened and it was Zhao again. The vampiress squealed and used Jia Chong to cover her frontal.

"Hi, Qi... No wonder my brother likes your bosom... No, Actually everyone does... Nice, Seeing you!" He closed the door again.

Jia Chong laughed deeply, "Go back to Yuanji, Zhao."

[A/N: Damn! These sexual harassers! Next chapter Sima Yi comes back and there is something about the Shu kids.]