Those episodes last night. Ouch. I had a terrible feeling that all the fluff they gave us in the beginning was just because they planned on killing us later in the season. Last night I said on tumblr that I'd rather pretend like after Killian left the voicemail, Emma heard it and called him back and then they just went somewhere to make out. Someone suggested that be a fic, and well here you are.

Disclaimer: I used lines from the 4x08 and 4x09 so just adding in that I own nothing. (Because if I did, the show would be a fluffy, happy, giddy pile of CS kisses and make out sessions.)

Moments after she ended the call with her mother, her phone rings again. It's Killian and while she knows it would be best to just pick up the phone and personally assure him that she is okay, she lets it go to voicemail.

An internal war debates within her, to listen to the voicemail or just delete it. She taps the indicator to listen, finger hovering just over the delete option. His voice stops her in her tracks. The concern and fear is blatantly obvious. He's not even trying to hide it.

Swan, it's Killian again. You have to listen to me. I know that you've been to see Gold and I saw what you did. If he has promised to get rid of your powers, don't listen to him. He doesn't want to help you, he wants to collect your powers in a bloody magic hat and when he does, you'll be sucked in too. I don't know what he's planning, but I know he's been lying to Belle. The dagger he gave her is a fake. And I only know this because…

Her heart lurches in her chest. She knows this is not going to be good.

Because I'm afraid I've been lying to you too. Gold blackmailed me into helping him. He knew I'd do whatever it takes to be with you and he used it against me. I just wanted to be a better man for you, Swan. But I failed and now because of that, I might lose you. I'm sorry. But I hope you'll never forgive me because that means you'll get this in time to save yourself. Goodbye.

Her hands tremble, sparking enough to cause the engine to stall in her car. There were too many emotions flowing through her. Anger at Killian for lying to her, disappointment for even believing for a second that Gold would help her and fiery rage that Gold would involve Killian in one of his schemes.

Ten minutes of extremely deep breathing left her almost light-headed but her fingers have stopped sparking and she can hold the phone in her hand. Not even fully through the first ring he picks up.

"Swan?" He asks cautiously but she can hear the underlying hope.

"It's me. It started with your hand right?" She asks, already knowing the answer.

"Yes." is his quiet reply.

"Come to the toll bridge, alone." She instructs.

-/-

Her magic flares to life, sparks shooting from her fingers the second he approaches. "Don't touch me okay? It's still not under control." She warns.

"I'm going to come closer." He states, walking purposefully toward her. She couldn't help but notice there was no hesitation from him, no fear.

"Did you see Henry?" She asks.

"Yes, he is fine. Elsa explained to him that the more you focused on not wanting to hurt him, the more unpredictable it made your magic and it caused the opposite. But he is fine, barely a scratch." Killian explains.

"I hurt him because I didn't want to hurt him?" She asks confused.

"Yes, love. You know that your magic is tied to emotion, just as Elsa's is. She said that it wasn't until she began to accept magic fully as part of herself and to love herself, magic and all, that she was fully able to control it." He says softly.

She snorts. "So tell me about this blackmailing issue." She needs to change the subject.

He sighs. "It does not paint me in the best light. I have failed you."

"I still asked you to come here, didn't I?" She counters.

"Point taken. After you asked me on a date, I went to Gold and asked for him to give me back my hand. I told him I knew the dagger he gave Belle was a fake to make him give me my hand." He starts.

"So you blackmailed him first. Wonderful." Her voice is a hiss.

"I wanted to be a better man for you, love. He put it back but threatened me that since it last belonged to me when I was a ruthless pirate it would act of its own accord. I grabbed the thief by the collar at the restaurant and it was I that gave him that black eye. I found him trying to break into the library. I went back to Gold to have it remove it, but he said he had given Belle the real dagger and now I had to make a deal with him."

"He kept your hand for centuries? What a sick fuck. What was the deal?"

"He is The Dark One. I believe "sick fuck" is a reasonable description. I had to agree to help him with something. We went to this man's house in the woods and Gold sucked him into a hat. Then he erased the tape showing that he and I were both there. I stupidly threatened Belle and he altered our deal to be for life."

"Are you really incapable of staying out of trouble? Do you remember being in the hospital? I told you you'd win the dead man of the year award. I expected you to be honest with me about Zelena and you didn't even bother to tell me she cursed your lips. I told you to take Elsa to the sheriff's station and I found you trapped under ice daggers by the Snow Queen. Then you decide to blackmail Gold and end up making a deal or multiple deals with him. Damn it Killian!" She's yelling, squeezing her hands together to keep the magic from escaping from them.

She watches as the remorse cross his face which still holds no fear of her magic. They were barely a foot apart, her hands shaking from anger and uncontrolled magic and he didn't even notice.

"I'm sorry. You should be more than well aware now that I haven't made the best choices in my life. Since meeting you I've wanted to be better. At first I fought against it but it was as though I had no control over it. After our adventure to the past, it's only intensified. I need to be better for you. You don't deserve a man like me. And I've failed you."

"I hardly think the man who just admitted not making the best choices in his life and who recently made a deal with Gold really gets to offer his opinion as to what type of man I deserve." She says carefully.

"You're completely right, love. I hope you can understand I never meant to cause you any pain and I am truly sorry for not making the right choice the first time." He turns and move as though he's going to walk away from her.

Her arm shoots out to stop him. "Where are you going?"

Turning his body back, he says "I thought...you're angry…"

"I didn't say you weren't an idiot, but I didn't tell you to leave either." She replies.

"Uh, Emma…" He says and she follows his eyes down to her hand on his arm. The feeling of leather under her fingertips registered in her brain. A soft white glow is surrounding her hand. The same soft white glow that comes when is is in control of her magic.

She sucks in a startled breath. "How?" Unintentionally she jerks her hand back, causing it to crackle again.

"Do that again." He says.

"What? Touch you? No way. You see my hands right now don't you? It's unpredictable again." She is exasperated he would even make such a suggestion.

"Wasn't it unpredictable before you touched me? Do it, love. I don't believe you're going to hurt me."

"Killian…"

"Emma. Do it."

With her eyes squeezed tightly closed, she tries to ignore the crackling noises as her hand reaches out for him. Finally she feels the soft leather beneath her fingertips but just as she is about to sign in relief, a sharp crack sounds and she hesitates but it is followed by the even flow of her magic rolling through her again. Cautiously opening one eye, she looks down first to see the white glow from before. "Didn't that hurt you?"

"Equivalent to that of a mosquito bite." He says stepping into her space.

"Show me your arm. I want to be sure." She demands.

He couldn't keep the glint from his eyes. "The bossy savior wishes for me to undress." Carefully he shrugs off his jacket and uses his hook to pull up the sleeve of his opposite arm, revealing the unmarked skin to her.

The relief in her eyes was immediate. Somehow he had managed to neutralize her power. If she could calm down enough to keep him nearby without adverse effects, she thought she might be able to keep it under control.

"I'm going to kiss you now." He voice is soft, tender.

She barely has time to meet his eye and nod her assent before his lips are on hers, arms wrapping around her waist. There was another crackling noises as their bodies connected but it was again followed with the steady flow of her magic, enveloping them in a soft white light. Exhaustion of trying to keep her magic under control hit her at that moment, causing her to sag into his form. His arms simply tightened around her as he walked her backward toward her car, never breaking the kiss.

She felt the car against her back and relaxed against it, only causing him to press further into her. They fit together too perfectly. She knew it wasn't a coincidence. He broke the kiss. "I don't wish to ruin this love, but after my confessions why are you allowing me to kiss you?"

"Because you're an idiot." She says.

"What?" He asks confused.

"You and I, we understand each other, right? We know what it's like to feel like you aren't enough, like anything that you could ever do would still never be good enough. That we had to be different to make someone want us. To be worthy of them or anyone else. It's not like that with us. You need to know that. You are more than enough just as you are. But I need to ask. Why aren't you afraid of my magic? Magic hasn't exactly been kind to you." She said.

"I know you won't hurt me. I am fan of every part of you." He says sincerely, eyes boring into hers.

Her lips are on his, kissing him forcefully, physically telling him she is aware of what they both have declared in other words. Her fingers are roaming all over him, wandering from his hair to his cheek and neck, gripping tightly onto his collar before twisting her fingers around the charms at his neck. He gives it right back to her in equal measure, kissing her like she's never been kissed before with more passion and desire than one person should ever be able to contain.

He breaks the kiss and she can't help the moan that escapes her lips or her amusement as she feels the shudder wrack through his whole body at her response.

"You're parents, Henry, I'm sure are quite eager to see you. Elsa as well. Perhaps she can provide more of a permanent solution." He says.

"Really? Are you feeling okay? I would have thought this current solution of me having to touch you would have been more than enough for you." She jokes with him.

"I merely thought you'd wish to touch me of your own accord, not simply because as a solution to a magical issue." He says.

"I'd be touching you either way." She confesses.

He leans in and kisses her again almost chastely. "I knew you couldn't resist me."

"We still need to talk about all of this, you know." She says and he nods.

Thoughts?