Chapter Three ~ Ball of the Blood Moon
I found myself sitting alone on that small island from before, with no sirens in sight. It was just me, alone on the miniscule beach.
I couldn't remember how I got here, just that suddenly here I was.
What is this place, anyway?
…
It's awfully lonely here.
I looked up to see a pair of sirens, both of them wading in the water. It seems they were looking for me to approach them…
...I don't know what came over me, but...I did just that. I walked over to them, even though every story would tell of how sirens only bring death.
But they were not agents of death, but...messengers from an unknown. Their hands both extended towards me, I allowed for them to pull me under the water.
…
It was cold, colder than any winter's storm. I couldn't breathe, it hurt to fight anything.
...But I opened my eyes, and what I found…
Another person, being carried past me.
I turned my head around to get a better look, but...whoever it was...he or she was already gone from sight.
...Was it Fraize, Mei, or Sayino?
I wonder...what they will be doing on that island.
…
I broke the surface of the water, sitting alone in an endless abyss. It was raining, the raindrops hitting against me like bullets.
The sirens waved off, and I was left behind. Alone here, in...whatever this place was.
…
I want to go back...back to that island.
...I guess...I'll just have to wait.
I laid down, facing the voided sky.
Closing my eyes, I let out a sigh.
…
"You're doing great, Kozaki. You just have to push a little harder, and I'm sure you'll do perfectly."
I slowly opened my eyes, looking around to see I was standing in an ice rink. To the side, Ingreis observed me with her arms crossed.
"Hey. Don't tell me you're just going to give up after coming this far." She smiled, shaking her head.
"I…" I gulped, feeling at my right arm.
"He looks pretty damn tired, if ya' ask me." Soro glided over, carrying a simple film camera in his hands. "Maybe he should take a break."
"N-No. Don't worry about me." I forced a smile. "I can do this. Just...I need some time."
"Show us what you've got, then." Ingreis nodded. "Your spirit."
With a semi-confident nod, I started to skate around the rink. I picked up speed, the breeze felt...refreshing.
I wanted to do just that, showing them my spirit. Everyone...they need a leader.
...I guess I'll have to be the one to step up.
It's not that I...want it...but…
…
I…
It feels like...I have to. I can't reason why…
…
Why...am I…?
Lost in my thoughts, I accidentally slipped and fell face-first into the ice.
"Yikes...looks like he needs some more practice." Soro commented to Ingreis.
"I'm sure he'll get the hang of it." The figure skater replied.
I slowly looked up to see them both standing in front of me, hands extended.
But…
My eyes grew wide, my face growing pale…
Ingreis's head was bleeding, and parts of her body seemed to be positioned extremely unnaturally. Soro's torso had a huge hole in it, with several bullet holes around his body.
"Kozaki...it's not your fault." Ingreis smiled, although sadly. "Take this with you, let it be a lesson to you."
"I said you were going to survive, didn't I?" Soro grinned. "Do that, for us."
I took their hands silently, unable to say a word.
"...Just take a deep breath." Ingreis instructed me. "You can do that, can't you?"
I did as she asked of me, then noticing Yuuta and Kamiyaki gliding towards us.
...Their wounds…
…
I...that's right…
…
They're all...dead…
"Heya, Kozaki." Yuuta smiled, waving lightly. "Don't worry about tripping up! Even I've had fish slip out of my hands."
Kamiyaki giggled. "And that says a lot, coming from him!" She then winked. "Hey, hey! I know you can do this. You need to believe in yourself, yeah!"
"I…" I felt myself tearing up. "You...you all…"
Soro crossed his arms, looking to the ice of the rink. "Just promise us something, Kozaki."
"Wh...what…?" I asked, gulping.
The ice of the rink began to crack rapidly. Soro locked his eyes on me. "Don't fuck this up. They need you."
They...need me…?
"Indeed." Ingreis nodded. "Kozaki, there is a spark inside you. Don't be afraid to let it out."
The ice cracked more.
"You can do this! I'm cheering for you!" Kamiyaki pumped a fist. "You...you may not be able to help us, but…"
"There's still time for you to help the others." Yuuta gave me a thumbs up. "You can stop this, Kozaki. Just think of it like...catching a really nice fish for dinner! It may take a while, but you'll reel in a nice one if you're patient!"
Patient…?
I...I don't have time to be patient...if I am...more people will…
The cracks spread across the whole rink...and just moments later, the floor shattered. I was left standing on a barrier, reaching out for all my friends.
...But I couldn't save them…
I closed my eyes...shaking my head slowly.
...
I couldn't save them…
…
I…
…
Hnn…
My head... it's throbbing…
"Oh, amigo. Are you awake?"
I slowly sat up, rubbing my eyes. "Ghh...I…guess so…"
Fraize knelt over, patting me on the shoulder. "Esta bien?"
I looked up to him, feeling at my head. "I mean...I haven't died, yet. That's not...really saying much, though…"
Fraize looked to the floor, his face holding an emotion of worry. "...Amigo, uhh…"
"Hmm?" I blinked, wondering what he was looking to tell me.
He gulped, looking back to me. "Recently I've been...uhh...como se dice…" He then sighed, shaking his head. "Feeling...strange."
"Do you...want to talk about it?" I offered.
The tour guide twiddled his fingers nervously, unable to make eye contact with me. "Ehh...perhaps un tiempo otro…"
I didn't quite understand why Fraize seemed to be so...uncomfortable. He's usually so chipper and…
Well...I did notice sometimes he does get a little...flustered…
…
Could it be…?
We both looked over upon hearing the sound of yawning. Weise sat up slowly, his face carrying a blank expression.
"Weise, are you feeling alright?" I slowly stood up, then taking a seat on the bed besides the fashion designer. "Did you sleep well?"
Weise looked to his hands, not saying a word.
They were shaking, so I took them and gave them a squeeze. "Hey...what's wrong? Are you okay?"
He blinked a few times, looking at me in the eyes.
"Esta bien, amigo?" Fraize knelt over by the bed, patting Weise on the forehead gently. "Hmm...no fever."
"...I...had a cauchemar." Weise looked down, closing his eyes. "Mais...I can't remember what happened. I feel scared…"
"Ah, perhaps some...té caliente puede ayudar?" Fraize offered a smile.
Weise looked over to Fraize, twiddling his fingers. "Je...je suppose so. As long as it's herbal tea. Oui, it's the only tea I like."
I slowly reached over, gently placing my hand to his head. "...Did they...punish you last night?"
His face grew pale. I could see him starting to tear up. "...Oui…"
...They took him while we were sleeping. I should've known. I should've...done something…
…
"What did they do?" I pressed him.
Weise felt at his head, shaking it lightly. "Je ne peut pas...remember what they did...only that J'ai...never felt so scared before in my whole life…"
I exchanged glances with Fraize, and we both pulled in Weise for a hug to comfort him.
"It's going to be ok, Weise." I patted him on the back, gently. "We're here for you."
"Merci." He whispered, closing his eyes.
We sat together in silence for a while. I didn't know what to say to provide any comfort.
…
What did they do to him?
He can't even remember…
…
I'm...just glad he's still...alive…
…
What did they do to all of us, last night?
To Fraize...to me…
…
I feel...nauseous…
…
After changing and getting ready for the day, we all walked into the dining room to see everyone sitting together, mostly on edge. Well...I shouldn't say they were all sitting together. Nobody wanted to sit anywhere near Neizami. On one hand, I could understand that. But...it seemed to be a little cruel...
"Hey, guys…" Sayino waved, forcing a smile. "Good morning…"
I took a seat besides Riko, hoping to have the chance to speak with her about...
...Well…
I just hope she'll be alright…
Knowing that...someone was trying to kill you…
That must be...awfully terrifying…
…
"Hey, Kozaki…" Riko looked to me, smiling lightly. "Are you...faring well?"
I sighed, shaking my head. "I...I don't think so…"
Riko picked up my plate from the table and filled it with a stack of pancakes. "Anne made an American-styled breakfast this morning. I hope you like pancakes…"
Anne nodded, placing a hand over her heart. "I figured it would be a sweet surprise. After all...it's a way to thank you, Kozaki."
"Thank...me?" I asked, certainly surprised. "What did I do?"
"You helped so much in the...you know…" Anne sighed. "I thought...since you worked so hard…"
"Thanks, Anne." I chuckled lightly. "It...means a lot to me."
"There's fried eggs, bacon, toast...do you eat this stuff often, Kozaki?" Kyohi asked.
"Ah, well…" I scratched the back of my head. "Yeah, but... usually I'll have a bowl of cereal and milk…"
"Oh, and you like maple syrup, eh?" Tikari walked over to my seat, pouring some syrup for my pancakes. "Is this enough?"
"U-Uh...yeah...it's plenty…" I looked down, sighing.
"Never had American breakfast before. I usually have some omurice." Zraiko adjusted his glasses. "It's not bad, though."
Neizami nodded, without any words to give. It seems she, too...was greatly hurt by yesterday…
…
I felt so damn bad, seeing her sitting alone. I...I knew too well how it feels like to be socially isolated. It's...not a good feeling.
…
Maybe I should go over and sit next to her.
Ah, but...I don't want to be rude to Riko…
...Damn it, why do I always get into these situations?
"Quoi are these?" Weise asked, cheeks puffed. He poked at one of the pancakes with his fork, as if poking an alligator with a stick. "They look like...epais crepes!"
"...I remembered a recipe for blueberry pancakes my mother makes." Mest nodded. "We still would eat them from time to time…"
"...No es terrible." Mei shrugged, taking a bite.
"A cup of coffee would serve me well, wouldn't you say?" Sayino smiled. "Are you a coffee person, Kozaki?"
"M-Me?" I turned to Sayino. "N-No...I usually have some orange juice…"
"Amigo, esta bien?" Fraize asked, patting me on the shoulder. "You seem…"
"Oh, I'm fine!" I nodded, then taking a bite from the pancakes. "I…"
…
They tasted...just like how my mother would make them…
…
The juicy blueberries...the sweet syrup...the soft, fluffy pancakes…
Why…
Why is everyone being so...nice to me?
I don't…
I felt the fork slip out from my hand...felt the tears slip down my cheeks…
Felt myself crying to go home…
Felt myself crying for my family...
...Felt myself crying for my mother…
…
"Kozaki, please...I'm here…" Riko hugged me, trying to be of comfort.
"Stop it...stop it...please!" I pushed her away, running out of the dining room.
…
I couldn't face them…
I couldn't…
…
I sat down in the garden, feeling nothing but pain twisting me to my core.
I can't…
…
I…
I just want to go home. I want to see my parents…to see Shiro…
...To have my old life back…
I don't want to die here…
…
The others walked into the room, giving me space. Riko tried to say something, but...it was clear to her I wasn't in the mood.
It's just...I didn't want to be treated differently by the others. I don't want to be a hero. I just...want to be me…
…
And I want...to leave it be…
Riko walked to my side, sitting besides me. She didn't want to intrude, but...was still looking to comfort me in some way. She closed her eyes and took in a soft breath.
When I took steps to the side, you came to stand besides me.
When I wanted to turn away and hide, you reached out to hold me.
And now the sun has come and gone,
The final grain of sand has fallen.
I fell asleep in your arms, as we took two steps forward.
We stood sound, we stood quiet.
And then I could feel myself take two more steps.
Two more steps, if you would let me.
Let us...take them together…
...
Even after everyone left, I stayed behind in the garden. I felt as though...I'd die soon.
I just...I don't know why or how. I can't tell why I feel this...void…
Is it because of...how much I miss them all?
I closed my eyes, feeling my chest. Trying to feel...something inside…
...I can't feel anything.
With no idea how to spend the morning, I started to talk to myself, as though I was speaking with them. I...probably sounded crazy…
"...Hey, everyone...I hope you're resting well." I closed my eyes. "Is...everything alright? Are you at peace? I mean...to die in such cruel ways…"
No response, of course.
"I wonder...do you resent me? Is it my fault that you've all died?" I opened my eyes, slowly. "Is it my fault...we're here now?"
...Nothing.
"I...want to believe that we'll make it out of here, but...I just…" I gulped. "I don't see it. I don't see us making it out...I'm scared…" I took in a deep breath. "Scared to death...I…"
…
I covered my face with my hands, shaking my head slowly. "There's no point, is there?"
"Don't say that, Kozaki! Buck up, won't you?"
...Huh?
I pulled my hands away to see Kamiyaki standing in front of me, or rather...perhaps only a vision…
Am I losing my mind?
"Coach always says that in the hardest of times, you need to show your biggest smiles!" The cheerleader poked me on the forehead. "So do that, won't you?"
"K...Kami...Kamiyaki…?" I slowly stood up, feeling at my head.
"Cheer up, yeah~?" She crossed her arms behind her back. "They need you!"
N...Need me?
"Come on, Kozaki. You can do this!" Yuuta smiled, patting me on the back. "Just think of it like...looking for the catch of the day! It'll be delicious once you finally reel it in and cook it!" He pointed to himself, flashing a grin. "I should know. I have some recipes written in my diary if you need!"
Wh...What's going on here?
"Hey, dumbass. Why the long face?" Soro crossed his arms, frowning. "You've gotten this far, haven't you? Stand up tall!"
"I...I…" I looked around, insecurely.
Am I dreaming?!
Ingreis placed a hand onto my left shoulder. "Kozaki. Listen to me."
I turned to her, without a word.
"You need to keep it together." She pulled her hand away, pointing to me. "You've got to stop this killing game."
I looked to them all, shaking my head slowly. "...I can't…"
"You never will if you put yourself to that mindset!" Kamiyaki shook her head.
Wh...Why…?
"No...everyone's going to keep dying and dying...until there's nobody left…" I closed my eyes, shaking my head.
"And do you want that to happen?" Ingreis placed her hands onto both of my shoulders, shaking me lightly. "Do you want everyone to die?"
"No...of course I don't!" I looked her in the eyes. "But...I can't stop this!"
A silence.
"Kozaki." Yuuta took me by the hands, smiling. "It's okay."
"...H...How is it okay?!" I asked, tearing up. "I...I couldn't...couldn't save you…"
"We told you, hehe. Or...did you forget?" Yuuta winked. "Aw, I thought I was the only forgetful one! Well…" He nodded. "Remember this, Kozaki! You can still save the others."
"As long as you do that…" Kamiyaki nodded. "We will be okay."
"So please." Yuuta picked up his diary, handing it to me. "Go and be with the others. Make some nice memories! You'll remember that, right?"
I closed my eyes, thinking. "I…"
…
When I opened them, I was alone.
I walked to the kitchen, clutching Yuuta's diary.
...Make memories with the others. That's what he asked me to do.
…
Was it really him, or...am I going insane?
…
In any case, he was right. They were only trying to comfort me, and I...fucked it up.
...Now's my chance to redeem myself.
I flipped open his diary, looking for fish recipes.
Salmon wellington...that doesn't sound too hard! It's just salmon and carrots and stuff wrapped in pastry dough...r-right?
I slipped the diary into my back pocket and opened the fridge.
The fridge...it was way bigger on the inside. I could...I could actually walk inside to find more ingredients.
No wonder Anne can make so many different dishes…
Alright, let me see here…
Aha.
I found the salmon hanging on a rack with several other types of fish. It was quite large, and...it wasn't prepped.
…
Y-You mean I have to prep it myself?
I...I can do it! I'll do it so that I can repay everyone.
After bringing the salmon out of the fridge and closing the door behind me, I laid it down onto the counter.
…
Okay...now I have to fillet it!
I grabbed a clean knife and walked over to the fish. My hand began to shake as I prepared to carve it.
Its eye...it was looking right at me…
Gulping, I began to fillet the fish.
…
Well...it was more like I absolutely mangled it.
...Well it's ok! I salvaged roughly twelve portions. I just have to cook them.
…
Where's the lighter?
…
Shit, I can't find the lighter.
But I don't want to ask Anne. If I do...she'll know what I'm up to.
...Aha! I've still got that packet of matches in my pocket. This will do.
I should make a good sauce for the carrots, right? To make it more flavorful?
...You know, why follow a recipe when I can make it my own?
I was overcome by a desire for experimentation. I wanted to make something incredible, to show the others that I've still got that spark inside…
...That will to live.
I guess I got...a little too ahead of myself.
…
Hehe...it was fun. I couldn't control myself. I just had to let it out.
...That fire. I had to let it out.
...And when I did…
Beep! Beep! Beep!
"Kozaki? Hey, get up!"
I slowly opened my eyes, finding myself to be laying on the floor. There was an incredible heat.
"Yikes, you look busted. Here, I'll help you out." Sayino kelt over, then picking me up. "Hey, put out the fire quick!"
"On it!" Anne nodded, rushing towards a cabinet. She pulled out a fire extinguisher and started to spray it all over.
"Dunce-suke, you lit the kitchen on fire!" Mei groaned. "Now how will Kimidori prepara el almuerzo?!"
"I…" I felt at my head as Sayino lowered me to the ground. "I-I'm sorry...I didn't mean to…"
"Holy guacamole!" Kyohi gasped, running over. "T-The kitchen is on fire!"
"I-I know...I'm so, so sorry!" I shook my head, ashamed. "I...I wanted to be helpful and I...fucked it up…"
"Kozaki…" Sayino patted me on the head. "Hey, it's alright. We'll just note for future reference to make sure you cook with a buddy."
I tried to say something. "I-I-"
"You-absolutely-foolish-fool-!" Monobotto fumed at me, rolling by at a rapid pace. "My-wonderful-kitchen-has-caught-fire-! I-don't-have-room-in-the-budget-for-this!"
It rolled straight inside, seemingly to help Anne die down the flames...
…
I don't know what overcame me.
One second I was just trying to cook some fish.
The next…
…
I lost control of myself. I turned up the gas, I needed to see that fire. I needed to be surrounded by the flames. That pain...I needed to burn it away…
…
What have I done?
...
I sighed, closing my eyes. "...I'm sorry about...how I acted this morning…you were all trying to be nice and…"
Kyohi shook his head, smiling. "No. You have every right to have reacted the way you did, Kozaki." He pumped a fist. "Just because you're our leader...it doesn't mean you have to always put on a brave face!"
"L-Leader…?" I gulped.
"I never agreed to this. Dunce-suke, our maestro? Ridiculo!" Mei frowned.
"Just roll with me, Mei." Kyohi whispered, although it was audible enough for me to hear. "Gosh, you've seen how hard Kozaki works to keep us all safe, and to solve all the mysteries...haven't you?"
The vigilante sighed. "Alright...es verdad...pero, I refuse to address him as my leader."
"I-I'm fine with that, really!" I fumbled for words. "I...I'm no leader…"
Just then, I noticed the crowd around the kitchen had grown. Everyone was standing, faces holding worry. Even Neizami showed up, standing timidly off to the side.
"The Bottolet announced that the kitchen caught fire!" Tikari gulped. "Are you alright?"
"O-Oh…I'm okay…" I sighed, shaking my head. "I'll be ok…"
"How did you even manage this?" Zraiko sighed, crossing his arms. "It looks like you were trying to make it catch fire. The place is a mess!"
Mest stood, watching me critically. He must be thinking I did it because of my talent, right…?
…
I've really gone and done it now...
"Kozaki, you should take a break." Riko smiled. "You're clearly...very much distressed right now."
"...I...I guess you're right." I gulped. "I...hope you can all forgive me."
"Maybe we should...go hang out together while Anne fixes lunch?" Kyohi offered. "I think...it will really help you out."
"Thank you for offering, but...what would we do?" I felt at my right arm, nervously.
"Anything outside la cocina, escuchame?" Mei glared at me, pointing straight to my face.
"Incase you forgot, we're trapped in space." Zraiko adjusted his glasses. "Where do you suppose we run should the place be swallowed by flames?"
"Alright, I hear you loud and clear!" I frowned. "No need to rub it in…"
"...Come with me, Kozaki." Mest stepped forward. "I would like to...have a discussion with you."
…
Oh no...he's going to rip me a new asshole, isn't he?
"Sure." I scratched the back of my head. "I've...been meaning to go to your Shift-Room anyway."
"...As I expected." Mest turned to leave. "Oh...and Riko, Kyohi, and Fraize...I extend the invitation to you as well."
They all exchanged glances as I began to follow Mest to his Shift-Room. They soon followed behind, as they didn't see anything else to do.
Upon Mest closing the door to his shift room, he locked it and turned to us. "Was this an outburst, Kozaki?"
"Huh?" I blinked.
"...You must've gotten your title of being the Super-Highschool-Level Arsonist for a reason." He walked over to me. "Did you light the kitchen because...you needed to start a fire?"
I backed away, nervously. "I-I…"
"Wait a minute, please!" Riko stepped in front of me. "How...how did you know about his talent?"
"...I quietly listen, observing everyone's movements." Mest looked around. "I found...you three know about this. What I am looking for is...an open forum. I want all of us to be on the same page."
Riko and Kyohi looked to Fraize.
"If I may ask, when did he tell you?" Riko asked, surprised.
Fraize scratched the back of his head. "Cuando...we stayed behind in his Shift-Room. Sí, he told me all about it…"
"I...I still need to make sure you all know everything…" I gulped, worried about causing tension. "Maybe I should now…"
Kyohi shook his head. "I think...Mest wants to talk about something before that…"
Fraize looked down, worriedly. "Yo comprendo…"
...
"What I need to know is...just what kind of an arsonist you are." Mest pointed to me. "If you are...a threat."
"Gosh, he's not a threat, Mest!" The hockey player stepped up. "Kozaki's worked so hard to keep us alive, why would he…"
"...How many people have you killed?" Mest glared at me.
"W...What?!" I asked in disbelief. "I've...I've never killed anyone!"
"Por favor, Mest. This is a misunderstanding!" Fraize stepped forward. "Kozaki no esta a bad person!"
Mest crossed his arms, examining me critically. "I'm only looking to make sure...this whole place doesn't catch fire."
"I swear, Mest." I put a hand up. "I-I'll try to control myself...the last thing I want is...for someone to get hurt…"
Mest walked over to his equipment, not looking at me. "... It's peculiar to think...you are an arsonist. It is a crime, after all. I find it unexpected that...partaking in criminal activity for you does not involve hurting others."
"I don't burn things to hurt others. I burn things because of my hurt, because I don't know any other way to...to feel relief!" I blurted out.
The tattoo artist sighed, sitting down in one of his chairs. "Keep your talent to your Shift Room. Promise me that, won't you?"
"I do hope you're not insisting Kozaki intends to burn us all alive." Riko held her hands together, upset. "Please, you must believe him! He doesn't want to hurt anyone!"
"...I promise." I looked down, gulping. "I'm...I'm trying to stop it...honestly…"
"K...Kozaki…" Riko looked over to me.
After a brief silence, Mest looked to the others. "...Dismissed."
They each seemed to be insecure about leaving, but did as what was requested.
"See you at lunch, Kozaki." Kyohi nodded. "Don't worry. We all have a need to vent from time to time! This is...just your way."
I nodded silently, watching him leave the room with the others.
The door closed, leaving me alone with Mest.
"...You've stayed." Mest observed. "Do you wish to...speak with me further?"
I slowly took off my hoodie and sweater, sighing.
"...Ah. I see." Mest turned to his equipment. "Where do you want them?"
I took a seat at the station, nodding lightly. "Nearby the others, light lavender and navy splotches, for them."
"Alright." Mest prepared his work. "I suppose...we shall take this time to speak further."
…
"...So tell me. What makes you an arsonist?" He asked as he was working.
"...I've been arrested before." I looked down. "Seven times. I've burnt down other people's things, abandoned buildings and structures...nothing to hurt people…"
Mest's voice held skepticism. "Truly?"
I closed my eyes, shaking my head slowly.
…
The detail...that only Fraize knows.
...When I told him everything…
When I told him...about Mikanne…
When I told him...how I burned down someone's house…
To feel…
…
Revenge.
…
So I told Mest. I told Mest all about it as well. About my need to feel revenge when I burned down that person's house. The strangest thing was...Mest didn't seem completely surprised. He was taken aback, sure...but...I felt as though he expected something like this to be said.
"But of course. How else would you have gotten your talent?" He asked.
...And he was right. How else could I have been the Super-Highschool-Level Arsonist? Ever since I was a child...I've been a criminal...
"Mest, tell me...where did your talent come from?" I looked back to him. "You say you studied design, so...why go into tattoo art?"
"It was...an odd turning of events." Mest finished up his work. "I don't believe I can explain it."
I decided not to press him further. After all, I knew he was uncomfortable when it came to talking about his most personal life.
I hope...if I continue to spend time with him, he will eventually open up to me.
Make nice memories with everyone.
…
I will. It's a promise.
Lunch was alright. It seems Anne was quick to forgive me for my mishap in the kitchen.
"Don't worry about it, sweety. It's the thought that counts." She smiled, warmly.
That reminded me...I still had Yuuta's diary in my pocket. I have to make sure I return it as soon as possible…
I guess Anne thought I really wanted to eat that salmon, so she had prepared a salmon dish for us to share. There was decent chatter, although Neizami distanced herself from everyone else. In fact, she stayed only long enough to eat before hurrying out from the dining room.
…
I should go talk to her.
...No...she needs time. I'm sure she must be greatly hurt by all , after she's had enough time...
And Riko...I still need to talk to her as well.
After lunch, that's a promise.
"Thank you for the meal, Anne." Tikari smiled, warmly. "Your hands seemed to be quite full, eh?"
The patisserie shook her head with a smile. "It's no worry, Tikari. I've had to manage worse situations than a kitchen fire."
A short silence.
"I'm...oddly interested to hear what could be worse than having your kitchen caught up in flames." Sayino scratched the back of her head.
"What if the kitchen was overrun by...a lion affamé?!" Weise asked. "Looking to eat...all of her sweets, leaving no crumb left behind!"
Mei rolled her eyes. "Vayrne, that's ridiculous."
"Je connais it's not expected, but…!" The fashion designer puffed his cheeks. "It would be worse than a kitchen fire, oui?"
"That also sounds utterly impossible." Zraiko adjusted his glasses. "When would that even happen?"
Weise pointed to the hacker. "When you least expect it, oui!"
Zraiko was about to respond, but Mest placed a hand onto his shoulder. The hacker sighed and brushed the subject off.
"W-Well...there was someone who attempted to rob us…" Anne gulped, looking down. "It was quite a mess, since the man was armed…"
"Damn...what happened?" I asked, turning to her. "You say attempted...does it mean he failed?"
Anne nodded. "I did all I could to protect my customers. After all, it is my obligation to satisfy them." She pumped a fist, looking determined. "I took my roller and whacked him from behind when he wasn't looking!"
Weise gasped, eyes wide. "You really did that? En aucune façon...so cool!"
Anne giggled, brushing her apron. "Yeah, then I took my extra pastry dough and smushed it into his face while some customers helped me disarm him."
"That's super cool, Anne!" Kyohi felt at his shoulder. "I still have to work on my own self-defense. Maybe you can give me some tips?"
"I will do my best." Anne smiled, kindly.
"S'il vous plaît, Anne! Teach me to be strong as well!" Weise raised his fists confidently. "I want to help us!"
…
Weise. Another person that I need to check up on.
That's three people now. I...hope I can keep up with everything…
"Ah-yes. Please-teach-me-as-well-Anne-Kimidori." Monobotto beeped.
We all turned to see it was resting on one of the vacant chairs besides Zraiko.
"No-extra-fish-?" Monobotto's glassy eyes lined up to the hacker's plate. "No-matter. It-seems-Zraiko-Nikiroi-will-not-mind-if-I-do."
With that, Monobotto snagged Zraiko's meal and grinded it up, including the plate…
Zraiko frowned. "...I wasn't done eating."
"Oh-boo-hoo." Monobotto teased. "Are-you-going-to-cry-?"
Zraiko groaned and turned away from the bucket of bolts, perturbed.
"It-seems-you-fools-are-quite-distracted-as-of-late. Perhaps-because-of-the-recent-trial-?" Monobotto spun around, slowly. "I-have-prepared-the-Mono-shift-Room-with-a-special-treat-for-you-all."
"What if...we don't want to come with you?" I asked, arms crossed. "And...you know...maybe you can kindly fuck off?"
Kyohi coughed, glancing over to me.
I sighed, standing up. "Okay, let me rephrase this." I clapped my hands together, pointing my fingertips towards Monobotto. "We do not have any interest in coming with you. Would you be so kind...to leave…"
Kyohi smiled, lightly.
"...And fling yourself out into space, where we won't ever have to see you again. Maybe you can piss off to the moon? Maybe hurl yourself into the fucking sun?!" I lost my temper.
The hockey player sighed, giving himself a face-palm.
"Damn, Kozaki." Sayino chuckled. "I reckon that Monobotto would consider it if we 'foolish lot' became boring enough."
…
Damn it all.
"Please-do-follow-me." The wingnut turned to leave. "You-fools-need-some-motivation-so-you-can-stop-being-so-very-boring."
We all were left to stand in front of the Mono-shift Room as Monobotto began its explanation of the 'special feature' being presented to us. Even Neizami was forced to come, standing isolated from the rest of us in silence. Monobotto must've threatened her...
"This-feature-will-be-a-sweet-reminder-of-what-awaits-you-fools-at-home-should-you-survive." Monobotto motioned to a scanner by the door. "Simply-swipe-in-your-Bottolet-here. A-projection-of-your-house-will-be-made-to-which-you-may-interact-with. You-can-have-as-long-as-you-need-before-the-feature-closes-permanently-tonight-at-night-bell. You-may-even-revisit-it-if-you-wish-until-then. There-will-be-no-penalty-for-those-who-are-in-the-room-prior-to-the-bell-and-having-it-ring-before-their-exit."
…
My...my home…?
I can see my home again?
I…
…
"Your-only-rule-is-that-you-cannot-bring-more-than-one-fellow-student-to-accompany-you." Monobotto rolled away. "This-attraction-is-completely-optional. However-I-have-no-doubt-you-will-find-use-in-it."
With that, the bucket of bolts disappeared to whatever sewers it lived in.
…
Go home...go home…
…
No...this is a trap, I'm sure. I can't fall for this. Nothing good will come out from this. It...it will only hurt me more.
…
So why...why did I step forward?
"Kozaki, what are you doing?" Zraiko frowned. "You can't seriously be thinking of going inside."
I stopped, looking back to Zraiko. "...I...I need to…"
"You can't let that robot into your head." Zraiko turned to walk away. "If you're smart, you won't play into Monobotto's hands."
I…
…
The crowd slowly decimated. Not because they didn't want to see their home, but because…
…
Because of what the killing game has done to us...breaking our minds...we can't even trust what we would find comfort in anymore without fearing that another murder would spark. Taking our love...and twisting it into a pitiful evil…
I looked back to the door, pulling out my Bottolet. It will be a quick trip, I told myself.
"Kozaki, let me come with you." Riko offered, stepping forward.
"Ah...thank you, Riko." I smiled, lightly. "I appreciate it."
"Yo puedo wait here for you both." Fraize crossed his arms, nodding. "Incase...something happens."
Weise raised his right hand. "I can help as well, oui! I want to make sure you will be safe, Kozaki." He smiled, crossing his arms behind his back. "Just like...how you promised to protect me, est-ce correct?"
Kyohi pumped a fist. "We'll be ready for action if anything happens!" He then nodded. "I hope it goes well, since...you've been on edge all day…"
"Thanks, guys." I nodded. "It...means a lot."
With that, I swiped my Bottolet into the scanner and shut my eyes, opening the door.
…
I was hit with a wave of familiarity...as if I was stepping inside through my front door.
Riko closed the door behind us, then looked around. "What a cozy home, Kozaki…"
I slowly walked to the kitchen, recalling all the many memories made there. The many plates of macaroni and cheese, the dinners I would eat with my parents...with my family.
…
Before...we fell apart…
…
I walked to the living room, sitting on the carpet that Shiro would always lay down on playfully.
I remembered the games I would play with Mikanne, the two of us warming up by the fireplace…
And the chairs...just as worn but loving as ever…
Laying down on the couch, I closed my eyes. I just...wanted to be swallowed up by the simulation. Wanted to open my eyes to see this was all a bad dream, to see...that I was still back home, with my family…
"Kozaki...are you alright?" Riko asked, softly.
Sitting up, I scratched the back of my head. "I...sorry. I just...was remembering a lot about home."
The clarinetist sat besides me on the couch, taking my hands gently. "Kozaki...I know you're feeling very...homesick. Believe me, I'm certain we all are. Please...let this visit bring you positive motivation instead of…"
"Riko, don't worry." I forced a smile. "I made a promise to the person I called, and I don't intend to break it. I only make promises when...I know I will see through that they will be kept."
She looked to the side for a moment, then back to me. "Would you...like to talk about yourself?"
…
I told her about my life at home, about how we lived from payment to payment. It wasn't much, but it was home. It was where my parents raised me, and I could never resent them for how hard they tried.
They tried...so damn hard…
And I let them down…
…
"Riko, come upstairs." I stood up, slowly. "I want to...show you my room."
We had a seat onto my bed, where I took in a deep breath.
What I wanted...more than anything…was to wake up like this was all a dream.
"Do you...feel the same?" I turned to her.
"If this was all a dream...I would have certainly mixed feelings…" She gulped.
"Why is that?" I blinked. "Wouldn't it be for the best?"
"Well...it would mean that you and I would never have met." She smiled, lightly. "And...I do appreciate your friendship, Kozaki. I can't say I've ever known someone quite like yourself."
"Jeez...thanks." I chuckled. "I try my best."
"But of course, sir arsonist." She curtsied, giggling.
A short silence.
"Riko...please...I want you to show me how you're really feeling." I looked her in the eyes. "I can see...yesterday hurt you. I don't want you to hold that weight inside. You...don't have to hide your troubles just to allow me to vent to you."
She looked down, saddened. "I apologize...it wasn't my intention…"
"Come on, partner." I patted her on the shoulder. "Now it's my turn to listen to you. It's only fair."
She held her hands together, taking in a deep breath. "I...don't know how to express it. I feel hurt, I feel betrayed...I thought Ingreis and I...grew close to each other…" She closed her eyes. "That we bonded over our stress...our anxieties about competing…"
"How do you feel...that Soro killed her to protect you?" I pressed her. "Do you feel...upset at him?"
"...I feel...I am not sure how to say it…" Her hands shook, lightly. "Should I be angry, Kozaki? If it weren't for him and Neizami, I might've been dead now. But at the same time...we've lost two more lives...and the killing game...it's still going on." She bit her lip.
"...Don't hold back." I pushed her harder. "I know you're feeling something more."
She sniffled, tearing up. "It hurts, Kozaki. It feels like a knife to my heart. I don't...I don't know what to feel..."
I pulled her in for a hug, trying to comfort her. "I...I don't know how you feel, but...I do because I feel the same. I'm angry...angry because there could've been some other way. I'm relieved, because you are still alive. I'm upset...so damn upset…"
"...Is this...what despair feels like, Kozaki?" She asked, hugging me tightly. "This sick, twisted feeling that stings my heart...is this it?"
I closed my eyes, nodding slowly.
…
There's nothing else it could be…
…
Despair...
...
It took us a while before we left the representation of my home. Mostly because...I didn't want to leave. I wanted to keep living in the illusion...in the world where there was no killing game…
…
"Is everything okay, amigo?" Fraize asked, worriedly. "Estas triste? You've been crying…"
I wiped my face with the sleeve of my hoodie. "...I'll be okay. I needed to see my home again, anyways...to remember where I want to be."
He smiled, lightly. "Bien. Estoy feliz for you."
"So...it's not a trap?" Weise asked, eyes filled with hope. "Je...Je voudrais to go see my home, too..."
"No, it should be fine." I nodded, smiling. "Though...you should go with a buddy."
Weise turned to Kyohi smiling. "We have yet to get to know each other, oui? Come with me, Kyohi."
The hockey player smiled, feeling at his shoulder. "Gotcha. I hope we'll get to know each other well!"
As they walked into the Mono-shift Room, I looked to see Riko still wiping tears from her eyes.
"Hey, go get some rest for the remainder of today." I nodded. "You look like you really need it."
She giggled, softly. "Thank you, Kozaki...I will see you tomorrow."
I watched her slowly walk back towards her dorm room, then turning to mi amigo Fraize. "Thanks for waiting. Everything go well?"
Fraize crossed his arms. "Ah, well...we spend much of el tiempo listening to Weise talk about...ehh...ropa." He felt at the back of his neck, embarrassed. "My uniform...esta 'bon' o… 'pas bon' o...ahh...no sé!" He felt at his head, expressing his confusion.
I chuckled, patting him on the back. "It's fine, don't worry. You know how Weise is with his unique designs."
Fraize looked towards the Mono-shift Room, face carrying worry. "...His punishment…"
"Yeah...I'm worried about him as well…" I looked down. "...I can only hope that he will be left alone now."
"Sí." Fraize gulped. "Tengo esperanza que...he will be fine now…"
I then turned to leave. "Well...I'll see you at dinner, Fraize."
"Ah...espera." He walked in front of me, stopping me. "If it is alright...quieres visitar mi casa conmigo?"
I blinked, feeling my right arm. "Uh...if you want me to, sure. Why ask me, though?"
He blushed lightly, then shaking it off and turning away. "I will explain everything later, comprendes? Meet me a noche, por favor. A diez."
I watched as Fraize walked back towards the dorms, scratching the back of my head with an eyebrow raised.
…
What is he thinking about?
Dinner went by without much tension, the only oddity being Riko's absence as she had already gone to sleep. I returned Yuuta's diary just before, checking over some more fish recipes for future reference.
I'll make sure to cook with a buddy next time so I don't light the kitchen on fire. At least I'll help Anne cook so that her load is lightened...
...
Filet minion, probably the most expensive steak in the world. If I was still back home, I never would've even dreamed of eating it.
Anne...she's really an incredible cook. If I can't cook her a meal in return as thanks, I'll have to find some other way to show my gratitude for all her hard work.
…
After dinner, I brushed my teeth and sat on my bed, patiently waiting for it to become ten. I set an alarm on my Bottolet to make sure I wouldn't miss it.
Once my alarm went off, I went to meet him as he requested.
I...wonder why Fraize wants to take me with him? He could've asked Mei, as they both speak Spanish and may have some form of synergy...but…
...I'll be sure to ask him later. For now, I guess I should just appreciate the invitation.
I found him waiting patiently by the door, checking his watch.
"Hey, Fraize." I waved, walking over. "I'm here."
The tour guide smiled as I walked over. "Amigo, buenas noches! Thank you for coming."
"Yeah, no problem." I scratched the back of my head. "So...you want to show me your home, right?"
"Sí." The tour guide chuckled. "Puedo make good use of my talent, verdad?"
"Hah, sure." I nodded. "Show me around, then."
Fraize nodded and swiped his Bottolet into the scanner, then opening the door. "Bienvenidos a mi casa, Kozaki."
We stepped inside, the ambiance feeling incredibly...comfy.
The colors were all warm, the rooms filled with a lot of clutter.
"Ah, lo siento for the mess." Fraize felt at his neck, embarrassed. "Yo...didn't expect this…"
"Heh, don't worry. My house isn't much better." I smiled, trying to be of comfort.
He smiled sheepishly in return, then taking some time to try and tidy up. Even though...it was all just a simulation…
...
It seemed like this was an apartment of some kind. I took a peek out the window to get a view of the beautiful Mediterranean Sea, seemingly miles away.
"The view is...even better from...the balcony." Fraize spoke to me in pure English.
"Let's go see it, then." I smiled. "It's your house, after all."
"Eh...shortly." He smiled, walking towards a room. "Come see this, por favor."
I stepped in to find the room pretty small, with two sets of bunk beds.
Four...four people sleep in here?
"That one...at the top...is my bed." Fraize climbed up, taking a seat in his spot. "Mi hermana Annette, she sleeps...underneath."
"I see…" I crossed my arms, looking around. "And...who else is here?"
"Mis hermanos, Zeke y Aarón." Fraize climbed down. "Carla y Felix sleep con mi madre, as...they are quite young."
"Twins?" I asked, interested.
"Sí." He nodded.
I looked around in the small space. "So...where is your father sleeping? Not with your mother?"
He blinked, then looking away with a light frown. "...No."
He seemed to be bothered by this subject…
"Umm...why's that?" I tried to provide for a vent, if he needed.
"...Let's go up...to the balcony." Fraize brushed it off, taking me by the hand. "Come, amigo."
"O-Oh, alright." I nodded, following behind.
We had to swim through some clutter in order to get to the balcony, which was probably the only completely clean part of his home.
But the view, with a vivid sunset slowly dropping into the sea...it was beautiful.
We stood together, hands gripping the railings.
"The view is...amazing." I turned to him.
"Hehe...if only it was the real thing." He looked down, saddened. "I wish...you could see...the real thing…"
I patted him gently on the shoulder. "Sure I will. When we get out of here, you can show me your real home. You...you can even show me Barcelona."
He blushed lightly, nodding. "...Yes, I would like that very much."
Nodding in return, I smiled lightly. "Sure."
...
Fraize looked over to me, gulping. "Amigo...about this morning…"
I turned to him, leaning against the balcony railing. "Huh?"
"I want to...tell you a secret as well." He closed his eyes, starting to speak slowly to ensure his words were all translated. "After all...you've already told me...everything about you."
"Alright. I'm listening." I looked him in the eyes. "...You can trust me to keep your secret."
Fraize reached into his inner vest pocket to retrieve his Bottolet. Gulping, he handed it to me. "Por favor."
I looked to his Bottolet, unsure of what his secret was that could possibly be held here.
…
And then...I found it.
"Under your name…" I looked back to him, blinking. "There's another name here. Is that...yours?"
"Sí." He nodded, feeling the back of his head. "Me llamo Fraize Kimizai, pero...mi nombre es Ramón Loarte."
"...Why is your name a secret Fra...Ramón?" I asked, returning his Bottolet.
"Please...call me Fraize." The tour guide smiled. "Loarte was...from my father…"
"Did...your parents divorce?" I gulped, worried about mucking up such a touchy subject.
"Yes...my father...he used Mama. Made six children...left her to the dust." Fraize felt at his necklace. "Left us in...poverty. I the eldest...had to provide for them. Mama...she's not a citizen...can't find a job…"
"Fraize…" I patted him on the shoulder, gently.
"Mama is from Italy. Had to rely on my father...for everything." He began to tear up. "My father used her...faked love...just to have her be a model for…" He covered his face, tearing up. "It was in the middle...of the night when he left. Had a spat with Mama...he attacked her...and when Annette came to see what was wrong...father attacked her as well!" His voice became almost inaudible. "...Her screaming...is trapped in my mind...seeing her face bleed...I…"
"...I'm...I'm so sorry…" I gulped, not knowing how to respond.
"I couldn't keep the name...that man gave me. I...am not Ramón." He frowned at his Bottolet. "I don't want anything...to do with the man...who hurt my family."
I pulled him in for a hug, trying to comfort him. "Well...I know that Fraize is an amigo bueno. You are not the same as your father."
He hugged me back, tightly. "Amigo…"
We stood together in silence for a moment.
"...I wanted to ask...if you would let me…" Fraize wiped his tears with a smile. "About...your story."
"Yeah?" I blinked, waiting to see what his question would be.
"...If you hadn't attempted to...take your life…" He looked me in the eyes. "Where do you think...you would be now?"
I looked away, feeling at my right arm. "Honesty…I have no fucking clue. The me that I am now is the only me I know."
He smiled, taking my hands. "Then I want...this you to know...people love him."
I chuckled, closing my eyes. "I mean... obviously my parents do. Anybody else…?"
Fraize paused for a moment, now smiling bashfully. "...Sí."
"Huh?" I blinked, confusedly.
Fraize pulled me in for another hug. "...I know...why I've been feeling weird…"
"You do?" I asked, hugging him back slowly.
"...When I'm around you...I feel...many things. Comfort...safety…joy…" He relaxed his body.
I continued to stand there, not quite sure where this was going. "Uhh...y-you do…?"
"I want...those feelings...to last." Fraize whispered.
I still...didn't understand…
He feels...good things around me?
Why? I'm a madness magnet...I...I even told him everything about my arsonism…
…
I…
"...Kozaki." Fraize gently stroked my hair. "...When we escape...would you be...mi novio?"
...Novio…?
"Wh...what?" I looked to him.
"Aaah...you're making me say it...aren't you?" He pulled away, blushing. "...Maybe it...was too early to ask. Lo siento."
Too early to…
What? What was he saying?
Ask me what?
He chuckled, beginning to walk away from the balcony. "Un tiempo otro."
"N...No, wait." I turned to him. "Novio. That...that means…boyfriend."
"Aaah...hehe…" Fraize scratched the back of my head. "Sí. Kozaki, I...really like you."
…
I...I don't know how to feel about this…
"Are you…" I gulped. "Really...really…"
Fraize walked back to me. "Sí. Me quiero un...relación seria contigo one day."
…
Everything...slowed down…
Fraize placed a hand onto my left cheek, looking at me in the eyes.
...I...I was scared…I didn't know what was happening...what was going on in his mind…
"I asked you...to come with me...because I…" Fraize leaned in, kissing me on the right cheek. "...I needed to tell you."
I stood still, not quite processing what was going on. Did he...did he just…?
"...Even if you don't feel the same way." Fraize backed away, placing a hand over his heart. "I needed to get that off my chest."
With that, he left.
…
He...he...what?
Wh...what?
Wait...hold on here!
We only just met like...a few days ago!
Wh...why…?
...Is it...because deep down inside...he thinks we're going to die?
…
If that's it...I can understand…
...I would want to die...with someone to call my own…
…
But...even still!
Why me? What...what does he even see in me?
"W...Wait!" I hurried after him, but...he had already left the Mono-shift Room. "...At least...tell me why…"
…
I never had the chance to ask him, since he had already gone to his room for the night.
…
What time even is it?
11:40, huh…yeah, I guess we must've missed the night bell.
…
I need to get to sleep…
I changed into my pajamas, relieved myself, brushed my teeth…
...But I wasn't focused at all.
Fraize...
…
How am I supposed to respond to this?
Should I be angry? Should I be...happy?
I…
…
We haven't known each other for long at all, and yet…
…
I placed a hand over my heart, closing my eyes.
How long has he...been thinking about this?
…
I should've known there was something going on, but…
I never...really expected this.
I never expected...someone to be…
…
But...it makes me feel…comfort.
...Comfort to know that somebody...somebody loves me…
...
I laid down on my bed, closing my eyes.
I'm lost…I don't know...how to feel…
…
Fraize…do I...feel the same?
…
I turned to the side upon hearing the sound of a beep from my Bottolet.
…
Is it…?
I picked up the tablet and sat upright, opening the messaging app.
…
'Are you free to talk right now?'
…
"I mean...I was about to sleep, but...sure." I sighed. "...What's up?"
'You seem to be...unwell.'
"Oh, sure. Yeah, I'm unwell. Real unwell. Everyone...everyone is going to die. It's all fine, though! Just...just fine…" I laid down on my bed. "...No...it's not fine...I can't do this...I can't protect them…"
'You mustn't give up, Fifty-four. I know right now...you don't believe things will be alright. But...it's that belief that will help you to survive.'
…
"Heh...it's not like you know anything about what I'm going through. That pain…" I placed a hand over my chest. "...That...despair…"
'I do.'
"Huh?" I blinked.
'I do know that pain. That pain...of what killing games can bring. That pain of watching your friends kill each other. That pain of wondering if you're next to die…'
Silently, I waited to see if there was more he or she would say.
'There weren't many survivors in my game.'
...Wait a minute…
I sat up, feeling at my head. "...Your...game?"
'Ah...I really shouldn't be talking about this. Another time, I'd like to tell you all about it. For now...I don't want to compromise our mission.'
"Your mission...to save us, right?" I forced a smile. "You'll...you'll save us, and...nobody else will die. Right?"
'I don't want to make any promises...after all...it's part of the game is that motives are given to cause murders. I don't know how many of you will be alive by the time we come.'
…
The truth...hurts…
'We've estimated your location, thanks to one of your friends working to make a connection.'
Does Fifty-three mean...Zraiko?
"...Please." I clutched my Bottolet, hands shaking. "Get us out of here…"
'I shall do everything I can. Please. Don't stop believing in yourself and the others. Find...the strength within you and your friends...to end this killing game.'
…
"I'll do...everything I can." I nodded. "Fifty-three... I'll protect my friends. I have to."
'I look forward to speaking with you again.'
"...Heh. Thanks." I sighed, looking down. "I guess I've made a good impression, haven't I?"
'Ah...an impression for sure.'
I looked to my bed, ready to sleep. "...I'll talk to you tomorrow. Goodnight, Fifty-three."
'Rest well, Fifty-four.'
With that, I got under the blankets and closed my eyes.
…
I've got to protect them. That is what Yuuta, Kamiyaki, Ingreis, and Soro wish for.
…
Make nice memories with everyone.
…
I'm going to keep us alive, in harmony. We'll survive.
…
We have to survive.
~Chapter Three, Daily Life One, End~