BLEACH: Listen To Your Heart

Written By: FlexRhysode1

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, dearest readers…I must confess. I half-believe that is should be RukixRen and OrihixIchi in the Anime series! I'm horrible! What are your thoughts on the series regarding pairings?

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Bleach, or the Characters within it, or the song 'Listen To Your Heart' by DHT. All rights go to their respective owners, namely DHT, and Tite Kubo. I'm not going to write a disclaimer ANYMORE! I REFUSE! Lol. After 14 chapters, I refuse to write it anymore. From here on out, disclaimer is assumed, implied…unspoken. The only thing I own, will be Rukia's Bankai, Ichigo's Second Bankai Phase, Isshin's sword (Shikai and Bankai) and the stupid unnamed Kuchiki whom I hate. Maybe his death will come sooner than I planned…

PREVIOUSLY:

"I know what you want to ask, Ichigo." He said, and Ichigo blinked in surprise.

"Go ahead. You've progressed further than any of us hoped you could in this short of a time. Go on, visit. It's been a few days now, and I'm sure you're going crazy after seeing everyone tonight. Be careful, though. There's that sneaky Surveillance guy out there still. Take care of him first." Shinji said. Ichigo nodded, and pocketed his Soul Pager.

Hiyori stomped over to him suddenly, glaring. He tensed, ready to take a blow. She surprised him then, by lightly socking him in the shoulder. "Good job, tonight. Now get going, before we change our minds." She said grudgingly. Ichigo grinned.

"Okay. I promise I'll be safe. I'll get my body from Urahara's, first, and then I'll be back as soon as I can." He said, and a few of them laughed, knowing just as well as he did that he wouldn't be back for a while. He flash-stepped, and was gone.

CHAPTER 14: Marred Reunion

Ichigo was across town, hiding his reiatsu completely and monitoring for the surveillance Soul Reaper. He had his mask on, in case he would be spotted, and he was standing in the shadow of an apartment. He found the reiatsu, only after straining for near two minutes straight. When he was absolutely certain of their location, he moved.

One moment, he was two blocks away from his house and the next moment he was across the street from his house and on his neighbor's roof. He held Tensa Zangetsu against the throat of a man clad all in black, like a ninja. The man stiffened, gasped, but didn't move. Wise choice.

"Why are you watching her?" He asked, his voice hard and cold. He knew this man would only sense Hollow reiatsu, and wouldn't quite know who he was. Ichigo eyed the window across the street, able to see Rukia in his room. She was pacing in his room, and he grinned in spite of his situation. She knew he would come tonight, and she was waiting.

The man wasn't answering, so he snarled, "WHY ARE YOU WATCHING HER?" He added in almost an inaudible whisper, "If you don't tell me…I swear I will kill you."

The man was shaking, unable to attain the façade of bravery. "I-I-I was ordered t-to by my superior!" He stammered, his voice breaking. Ichigo felt a strange thrill at being able to scare the man like this.

"The reason?" He hissed.

"I-I had n-no reason given! They just said to report if it looked like she was telling someone something important!" He whined, and Ichigo ground his teeth. What would be the purpose of that? Did Rukia know something that someone didn't want her to know, and they were watching her, making sure to know if they needed to kill or harm her?

"You will leave here. You will not come back. You will warn your superiors…anyone found watching Rukia Kuchiki after this will be killed on sight. Go." Ichigo hissed, stepping back and removing his sword from the man's throat.

The man looked back once, and choked on a cry of terror as he saw Ichigo. He flash-stepped, hoping to flee from Ichigo. His Shunpo was so horrible that Ichigo could track his movement as easy as if he was walking. The man activated a gate, and fled into it. Ichigo frowned. He needed to tell Renji about it.

He flash-stepped, and was proud that he made it to Urahara's in one step. He stopped right outside the door, suddenly conscious of how intimidating he would look, wearing his Hollow mask and still holding Tensa Zangetsu. He hastily, yet carefully, tucked Tensa Zangetsu into the sash around his waist. Then, he stepped up to the shut door of Urahara's Shoten. He could sense Renji's, Ururu's, Tessai's, Jinta and Urahara's reiatsu close to the door, so he wouldn't have to knock loud.

He knocked twice, sharp yet soft. Almost immediately, Jinta threw open the door, glaring. He uttered a yell of shock and jumped backwards, going on guard. "I'm not here to kill anyone, or even to fight." He said, as soon as Ururu and Tessai appeared to support Jinta.

Urahara stepped around, and his eyes widened as he recognized Ichigo. He knew that he was operating as 'Hichigo', so he wouldn't blow Ichigo's cover. "Well…Mr. Hollow…I must say, you aren't my usual customer." He said, laughing nervously. Ichigo glared, stepping back into the role of 'Hichigo'.

"I'm here for the redhead. I need to speak with him." Ichigo said, keeping his hands loose at his sides. Renji appeared almost immediately, in a Gigai. He was wearing tight jeans, a tie-dye shirt, a brown vest over that, and a headband over his forehead. He looked like a hippy, and Ichigo fought not to laugh.

Renji separated from his Gigai immediately, popping a mod-soul into his body. His body knelt, while he stood with his Zanpakuto unsheathed and in a guard position. Ichigo rolled his eyes. "If I had wanted to attack, none of you would still be alive." He reminded Renji. Renji cautiously lowered his blade.

"What do you want?" Renji asked gruffly, noting that 'Hichigo' had his sword tucked into his sash.

"I was across town..." Ichigo started, and carefully thought how to phrase his next words. "I was on my way to meet someone, when I noticed someone hiding on a roof…spying on someone. Normally, that wouldn't have bothered me. Except, this was a man dressed all in black…and he was spying on a woman. One of your friends, actually." Ichigo said, and Renji's eyes narrowed.

"Now, I'm not usually nosy, but I don't just ignore something wrong when I see it. I asked the man his business…and he told me he was ordered to watch this woman, and report if it looked like she was telling someone something important. It's vague, but maybe your friend knows something important about someone and is being watched to make sure she doesn't spill the beans. " Ichigo said. Renji's eyes widened slightly. "I see…" He said slowly, his brain apparently going into overdrive to think about what Rukia could know.

Ichigo shrugged. "It's none of my business, but if we're going to be working together in the future…I'd like to think of this as the first act of goodwill." He said. Renji nodded slowly.

"Well…thanks for the information. If you'll excuse me, I need to go report this to…someone." Renji said, frowning deeply, and nodded at Ichigo. Then, he bowed to Urahara, and ran out of the Shoten. The Mod-Soul in the Gigai frowned. "Man…that means I'm stuck in here for a while! I'm gonna go sleep." It said, and walked away. Ichigo frowned as it slouched away. That was so un-Renji like…it was scary.

"Well, Mr. Kurosaki…how can I help you?" Urahara asked quietly, and motioned for Ururu to shut the Shoten door. Once it was shut, Ichigo removed his Hollow mask, and Tessai and Jinta both made surprised noises.

"Mr. Ichigo, what a pleasant surprise!" Tessai said, pushing his glasses higher onto the bridge of his nose. Jinta grunted. "Wow…didn't recognize you, Spiky."

Ichigo shrugged, and let his Hollow mask dissipate. He turned to Urahara. "I'd like my body, please. I was on my way to visit my family and Rukia…but Shinji warned me about Rukia being under surveillance. I took care of the watcher, and now I need my body to visit." Urahara inclined his head.

"Very well. Allow me to show you to your body. We had to do some cosmetic changes, in case you wanted to walk around in your body again." Urahara said, and started to walk towards the back rooms. Ichigo followed slowly, eyes narrowing. "Cosmetic changes?" He asked.

*************

Ichigo stared, dumbfounded, at his body. A Mod Soul had been inserted into it from time to time to keep the muscles working and in shape, to bathe and keep his body's hygiene in reasonable quality. But, his body was empty right now and laying on a bed. Urahara stood next to him, stifling a chuckle.

"Well, what do you think?" He asked lightly.

Ichigo choked out, "My hair…is…black." It was true. His eyebrows and hair were black. Urahara had died his hair, and Ichigo thought it looked hideous. Absolutely hideous. His clothing was all black as well, so he could have passed for a goth freak. Ichigo groaned.

"What? We had to make you mostly unrecognizable, and the most dominant feature was your orange hair. We added a fake scar, it can be removed if you wish." He saw Ichigo's look, and hastily reached over to the face of Ichigo's body and pulled off the clear sticker-type scar. He continued. "We also added a wallet with a fake ID, naming you as 'Roy King'. You're 18." Urahara said, and Ichigo growled at his name.

"Roy? King? What the hell? What's up with the weird name?" Ichigo demanded. Urahara laughed. "I wanted to name you Roger, but Ururu insisted on Roy. And Tessai demanded 'King' as a generic last name. So blame them."

Ichigo grumbled for a few minutes, before sighing. "Oh well. Fine. Thanks for taking care of my body, Urahara." He laid down in his body, synching easily, and Urahara laughed.

"No problem. Please, enjoy your new look." Urahara chuckled, and Ichigo frowned darkly as he sat up. He got on his feet and stretched. He was pleased to notice that it wasn't as stiff as he remembered. The mod-soul must have worked his body out well.

"Thanks…I'll try." Ichigo said sourly, and then popped his neck. "Okay. I'll see you later, Urahara. If you need me, contact Rukia. She'll get the message to me." Ichigo said, and Urahara nodded. "Very well. Have a good night." He said, his tone softer. Ichigo heard Urahara's genuine sympathy in his voice. Ichigo nodded, and walked away. He didn't want Urahara's pity or sympathy right now. He wanted Rukia.

*************

By the time he reached his house, he was so anxious that sweat beaded his forehead even in the cold night. He took a deep breath, the chilled air making him alert, and composed himself.

He walked up to the front door of his house, paused…and then knocked. He glanced at the watch on his left wrist as he withdrew his hand, and winced. It was already almost eleven o'clock. He strained his ears, listening for sounds of activity inside. He heard the television, which meant Isshin was watching the news before he went to bed.

Suddenly, the door opened, as Isshin said, "Hello?"

Isshin froze as the light revealed Ichigo, with his new look, standing patiently. His father's eyes were wide, shocked, and his jaw fell open. "I-Ichigo?" Isshin whispered. Isshin grabbed him before he could reply, dragging him into the house and shutting the door behind them. Then, Isshin wrapped Ichigo in a bone-crushing bear hug. Ichigo choked out a laugh, patting his father on the back.

"Welcome back, son. I felt you out there tonight, but I wasn't sure if I'd get to see you! When you left, I didn't think you'd get to come visit." Isshin said, releasing his son. Ichigo grinned.

"I couldn't stay away." Ichigo admitted, and Isshin chuckled. Ichigo's mood dropped for a moment. "Dad…did you fight Grimmjow? He mentioned a goat-chinned Shinigami who tried to protect Rukia…" He asked.

Isshin raised his chin indignantly. "Why does everyone call me a goat chin?" He muttered. "Yes…Lisa and I engaged Grimmjow, and he had us outclassed from the start. I was foolish enough to believe that I wouldn't need my Bankai…and I paid for it. Lucky for me, your appearance distracted Grimmjow. Lisa healed me, and then left. By the time that happened, it was too late to join you." Isshin admitted.

"Geeze…" Ichigo breathed, scared suddenly at how close he had come to losing his father. Isshin read him easily. "Relax. What's done is done, and there's nothing we can do to change it. Next time, if I see him again…my Bankai will be more than enough. Trust me." Isshin comforted his son. Ichigo shivered.

"Okay…but next time I'm going to make sure I'm there." Ichigo said, and Isshin grinned. "Well, good."

Ichigo couldn't help but grin back. "Kay." He said, and Isshin laughed and smacked him on the back. Ichigo stumbled forward, laughing. He felt so happy now, here…home. He saw his mom's poster, and realized he even missed that. Unable to help himself, he murmured, "Hey, mom."

Isshin patted him lightly on the shoulder, and murmured, "The girls are asleep…but you can wake them up. I'm definitely sure they won't mind."

Ichigo nodded, and grinned widely. He missed his little sisters insanely. He bounded up the stairs, not making any noise, and ran down the hall. He didn't think Rukia would her him, and he was glad. He wanted to surprise her still.

He stopped, perfectly silent in front of his sister's door. He waited for a moment, and then opened their door. He flipped on the light, and sighed. His little sisters were perfectly still, sleeping peacefully, their faces smooth and emotionless. He walked to the middle of their room, and stood there, sighing. He missed his baby sisters.

Despite Isshin's ritual of yelling to wake the girls up, he knew they were light sleepers and that the slightest noise from someone would wake them up. So he spoke softly. "Guys…I'm back." Instantly, Yuzu sprang out of bed, blinking sleepily. He laughed as Karin fell out of bed and onto her butt. Both of the girls stared, uncomprehendingly, at him, and he grinned down at them.

"Well…I thought you'd be glad to see me…but, I guess I wasn't gone long enough." He joked, and that made both of them launch themselves at him. He caught them easily as they wrapped their arms around his waist, and he laughed.

"Big brother!" "Ichigo!" They squealed, even Karin, and Ichigo squeezed them tight.

"Dad said you were out there tonight, and you killed one of the Arrancar!" Karin said, her eyes wide. Ichigo nodded, grinning. "Yeah. I couldn't let them hurt any of you guys, could I?" He asked, rhetorically. Yuzu buried her face into his body, sniffling. He patted her head, and comforted her.

"Hey, it's okay." He murmured, and Karin stepped back. She crossed her arms, looking smug. "Feeling paternal?" She ribbed, and he laughed.

"I never thought I could miss you guys this much." He admitted, and Yuzu looked at him. "Have you been eating enough? Are they treating you okay? Are they mean?" She asked, always the little mother. He laughed.

"If there's one thing that we have enough of, it's always food. When we're souls, we get hungry when we use spiritual power…so meal times are massive over there." He comforted her. "And they couldn't be nicer. They're all amazing, and have their own quirks…it's like a big family. Someday…I'll introduce you guys to them." He said, and Karin and Yuzu continued to pelt him with questions. He explained all of his training easily, keeping out any of the disturbing parts, and told them about each of the Vaizards. It took half an hour for him to tell them everything, and to realize that he desperately wanted to see Rukia. He sighed, and Karin knew immediately what was going on.

"Ichigo…" She said quietly, pausing hesitantly. He frowned. "Yeah?" He asked.

"Rukia…was…she was crying a lot earlier tonight, before the Arrancar came." She said. Ichigo stiffened, his eyes narrowing. "She was?" He asked

"Yeah…but we don't know why." Yuzu pitched in sadly. Ichigo sighed and ran a hand through his black hair. He made a disgusted face as he eyed a stray lock of black hair that got in his eyes. Yuzu giggled.

"I don't like it much either." She said. Ichigo grinned. "I'm gonna find a way to get Urahara back for this." He promised them, and Karin smiled. "If you want, I can beat up Jinta." She said, laughing. Ichigo shook his head. "No, I think he'd enjoy that too much…and you would too" He teased, not unobservant enough to not see the glint of fondness in her eyes when she mentioned Jinta's name. He grinned and ducked underneath the pillow she threw at him, and laughed as he darted to the door.

"I'll be back. Time to surprise Rukia." He said. He laughed, and crept quietly down the hall to his doorway. He paused, and frowned. The bedroom light was off. Had she given up and gone to bed?

He put his hand on the cold knob, and turned it. He pushed his door open slowly, glad it didn't creak, and examined his room as the light from the hallway lit it up a bit. His floor was spotless, and his desk was empty…but Rukia lay on his bed, on top of the covers. She was curled into a ball, trying to stay warm. He felt the sudden surge of emotion in his body, so intense it made his heart beat ten times faster than he thought possible. He felt light-headed as he saw her, wearing a sleeveless, spaghetti-strap dark violet sleeping gown. She was so beautiful, so perfect…

He crossed the room silently, and knelt beside his bed. She was facing the door, so the light illuminated her pale face. Her mouth hung open slightly, not much, and her breathing was deep and even.

He hesitantly reached his right hand out, and caressed her pale cheek. Her breath hitched in her sleep, and she gave a soft moan and almost unnoticeably leaned a bit into his hand. He stroked her soft skin, trailing his warm hand down the skin of her neck, her shoulders, and her arms. Her eyes fluttered open, and he uncloaked his reiatsu enough for her to sense it was him…just so she wouldn't panic and hit him.

"Ichigo?" She breathed, her violet eyes alert. She waited for his response, as he looked into her eyes. He didn't even bother with his usually gruff façade, and he forgot his frown. "Sorry I took so long, Rukia." He murmured. She sat up slowly, examining him. Then, she frowned slightly and she raised her arm. Her hand touched his hair lightly, fingering the black locks, and she bit her lip.

"I know. It looks horrible." He laughed, and she nodded. "It really does." She admitted. He grinned and she smiled softly. Her lips captured his attention, so soft…tempting…

He leaned in and kissed her without really thinking about it, and all he could think about was the soft feel of her silk lips. She froze under his touch, which made him freeze. He pulled away. "I'm sorry." He murmured, ashamed as her reaction brought him back to reality. Just because he missed her so much and felt that way, didn't mean she would. He saw something in her eyes that he couldn't place…and he stood. He stepped back, feeling rejection wash through him, making him choke. He frowned and put up his tough-guy façade.

"I came to visit for tonight. I didn't mean to take so long to get here…" Ichigo said, crossing his arms over his chest. Rukia looked away for a moment, and then looked back up at him. He attempted to block his emotions, so she couldn't read him like an open book.

"Did I hurt your feelings?" She asked, her face showing her surprise. Ichigo frowned deeper.

"Of course not!" He scoffed, cringing inside at his lie.

"Oh you fool…" She sighed, and she stood. She crossed the distance he had instinctively put between them, and he let his arms fall to his sides. She wrapped her arms around him, as he stood stiffly. "I'm very glad to see you again…more than I can say." She whispered.

The words flew out of his mouth before he could stop them. "Are you sure?" He asked, slightly angry. She looked up at him in surprise. Her gaze looked slightly hurt. "Of course!" She whispered. He frowned.

"It's just…" She hesitantly said, and Ichigo winced. He knew it. Of course she was glad to see him, but there was something else. Had she realized that she couldn't wait for him? Had she realized she didn't love him? Did she want to go back to Soul Society?

"Stop it." She said suddenly, and she stepped away from him. He ground his teeth. "What?" He asked, trying, and completely failing, to hide the anger he was feeling.

"It's just that you caught me off guard. It's not that I didn't enjoy it, didn't want it." She said, lying. She didn't want to tell him about the event that happened yesterday night. She didn't want him to know how she had been used, how disgusting she felt, and how his hungry lips had felt too much like the Kuchiki's against hers. She didn't want Ichigo to touch her. She didn't deserve his touch. She was too weak, and now she was disgusting, used.

Ichigo read the lie in her eyes easily, but disguised the sudden breaking of his spirit by a snort. He said, "It's fine, Rukia. If you don't want me to kiss you, just say it. I told you that I'm comfortable with anything. Holding hands, hugging, kissing…I won't do anything, though, that makes you uncomfortable." He said. She could see his hurt in his warm brown eyes. He had obviously missed her…a lot more than he cared to admit. She had missed him too, but…she couldn't stand to be physical with him at the moment.

She didn't reply to his statement, but let it stand…so he would take it she didn't want to kiss. She saw a flicker of bitterness flash across his eyes, and she felt sorry for her actions. Maybe she could force herself to kiss him…just to take away the hurt she just inflicted. She was about to lean up and wrap her arms around his neck, when he turned away. She stopped, dropping her arms to her sides in remorse. He was hurt by her actions.

"So…how's everyone doing?" He asked. He sat on the bed, and she sat next to him. She made sure to have their legs touch at least, so he wouldn't think she didn't want him. He shifted casually, too casually so she knew he did it on purpose, and their legs were an inch apart…no longer touching. She wanted to kick herself.

"They're all okay, even Chad now. Orihime's healing powers have increased. But…you saw that earlier." She said softly. He nodded, glancing at her with a veiled gaze. She filled him in on how Keigo and Mizuiro and Tatsuki were still mostly wrecks, with Keigo not telling many jokes anymore and their lunches being rather subdued. She told him about his funeral, and he frowned a lot when she told him about it. She told him about everything she could think of…but he didn't relax at all. She had hoped he would relax and forgive her…but he remained stiff. His shoulders were set in a way that spoke of his tension.

They were silent when she finished…and Ichigo felt his father's reiatsu draw close. He sighed. "Well, I hate hurting people like that…" Ichigo murmured, and sighed. "But it's necessary." He said, and Rukia nodded.

"Of course it is. We can't have you hunted down and killed by Soul Society." Rukia said softly. Ichigo nodded half-heartedly, and said, "Well…it's about eleven…"

She could see how he wanted to leave. She felt beyond horrible. She had ruined his night, hurt him by reacting as she had. He thought she didn't miss him at all. She felt so low. Maybe she could force herself to pretend she was comfortable with him touching her…so he wouldn't be so unhappy. She was about to lean into him, when he stood. He stepped away from the bed and sighed. "I'm sorry, Rukia. I shouldn't have come. Shinji wanted me to come back as soon as I could anyway…" Ichigo lied.

Rukia blinked back sudden tears. "I…understand." She whispered. He looked back at her, and she saw a slight softening of his anger and hurt.

"I'll be around…if you ever want to talk to me, just call me on this." He said, fishing the Soul Pager Hitsugaya had given him out of his pocket. Rukia nodded, glad that he would at least be available to talk to every once in a while.

"I'm gonna go now. Call me if you need anything." He said, and walked out of the room. She saw his little sisters run after him, demanding for him to stay. He apologized, saying he was supposed to be with the Vaizard. They whined, and Rukia listened carefully as he murmured something.

"Karin…Rukia doesn't want me here, okay? It's better if I go. Just…do me a favor and if you guys ever need to talk to me, ask Rukia to call me and put you on. Don't worry…I'll be around." He said, and she jumped to her feet. This isn't how it was supposed to go! They were supposed to have a blissfully sweet reunion, but here he was hurting and leaving…believing she didn't want him around. She dashed out of the room, calling, "Ichigo, wait!"

But, she was confronted by Yuzu and Karin…and an empty hallway. She reached out with her spiritual senses and she felt his cloaked reiatsu a long ways away. He must have separated from his body and flash-stepped away as soon as he finished his last words to the girls.

Yuzu and Karin looked at her, Karin's eyes accusing while Yuzu looked confused. Rukia fought back a tremor in her bottom lip, and turned back to Ichigo's room. She shut the door behind her, shut off the light, went to Ichigo's bed…and curled up into a ball. She laid on his bed, allowing a few tears to stream down her face. Why did she ruin this? Why couldn't she have just went along with everything, for Ichigo's sake, so he wouldn't have been hurt like this? She had made him feel unwanted, unwelcome, in his own home! She felt so low…wondering what was wrong with her. She cried herself to sleep, completely hating herself.

-------------------------------

Ichigo was back at the Vaizard Hideout, holding his body over his shoulder. Everyone was lounging around as usual, and they all looked surprised as he suddenly appeared. He was wearing his mask, using it to hide the fact that a few tears had run down his cheeks, but wasn't in his Bankai Form. He strode over to an empty chair, and deposited his body roughly.

"Berry's back early!" Mashiro chirped, jumping up from next to Kensei. Kensei, who had been idly twirling his Zanpakuto on his fingers, gripped his knife and deposited it into his ankle-holster. He stood, as did all of the other Vaizard.

"Why're you back so early?" Hiyori demanded, appearing in front of Ichigo suddenly. She planted her hands on her hips, and was glaring. Ichigo turned away from her and grabbed his Shikai Zangetsu off his back. The bandage wrapping unfurled, revealing the gleaming blade, and he strode away from Hiyori and towards the training area.

"Because." He said, and called out, "Shinji! Me versus you, come on!" He roared, and all of the Vaizard exchanged loaded looks. Ichigo hadn't ever asked to go against Shinji. When it was Shinji's day to train Ichigo, Ichigo was always worse for the wear because he was so outclassed. Shinji appeared, frowning, at the top of the training room stairs.

"What're you doing back so early?" Shinji asked. Ichigo didn't answer.

"Let's go. Now." Ichigo said, and swung his Zangetsu. He left himself wide open, but Shinji didn't take the shot. He danced backwards, with so much ease it was apparent he wasn't even trying. Shinji asked again.

"What are you doing back so early? What's wrong?" Shinji asked, and Ichigo didn't answer again. He attacked Shinji, sloppily, as he pursued Shinji down the stairs to the training room. All seven other Vaizard followed, walking slowly, all of them wearing concerned looks. They didn't know Ichigo all that well…but it was obvious something was wrong.

Ichigo got tired of Shinji dodging and yelled, "FIGHT ME!" Everyone blinked in surprise at the desperate edge to his voice, and Hiyori frowned deeply. She was about to yell at Ichigo, when Rose murmured, "Don't interrupt. He needs this. Watch how Shinji handles this."

They all watched, some of them with emotionless faces, while Hachi worried aloud. "This is dangerous!" He whined.

Shinji finally engaged Ichigo. Shinji blocked Ichigo's dangerously reckless blows, never taking a shot at the young man. Shinji's moves were small, precise, never wasting energy in a more flashy move…he was dangerously efficient. Ichigo tried to block his pain, tried to block his anger and frustration, tried to shut it down as he hammered away at Shinji. He saw he wasn't getting anywhere, so he slammed his blade down on Shinji's and locked their blades together. Shinji regarded him without visible emotion, past their blades. Ichigo snarled and raised his left hand towards Shinji. He formed a Cero, and Shinji's eyes widened slightly as the red energy formed in Ichigo's palm. Ichigo fired Cero, and knew he missed. Shinji had flash-stepped to Ichigo's side, but didn't strike. Ichigo swung his blade up at Shinji, stopping it and placing his arm on his sword hilt.

"BANKAI!" He screamed, and spiritual energy exploded from him. He laughed as he saw this take Shinji by surprise and throw him backwards, and he waited for the smoke to clear to pursue Shinji.

When the smoke was cleared, Shinji stood across from him…his mask over his face. Their golden eyes met, regarding each other carefully, and then they moved. They moved with more speed than Ichigo had even used when he fought Byakuya. They Shunpo'd, counter-Shunpo'd, Ichigo attempting to catch and swing at Shinji. Shinji evaded him easily, and Ichigo found his frustration reaching boiling point. He didn't want to train…he wanted to fight! He wanted to cut, to be cut. He wanted the chance to live…or to die.

"FIGHT ME! STRIKE AT ME! CUT ME!" Ichigo roared, as tears ran from his yellow eyes and down his cheeks. He didn't care that Shinji could visibly see his tears, didn't care that Hiyori was screaming at him, and didn't care that Hachi had erected a barrier around them.

Ichigo desperately fired Getsuga Tenshou after Getsuga Tenshou at Shinji, in an attempt to make the man fight back. Shinji only deflected them with simple flicks of his wrist. Ichigo sprang forward, screaming again, "FIGHT ME!"

Then, Shinji attacked. Ichigo was quickly overwhelmed, unable to track Shinji's blade. He felt Shinji cut his clothing, never his skin, and then bat Tensa Zangetsu easily from Ichigo's grip. Ichigo's hand went numb from the force behind Shinji's blow, and Ichigo attempted to form a Cero to blast Shinji. Shinji smacked Ichigo's hand with the flat of his blade, smacking it away, and then smacked the back of Ichigo's knees. Ichigo fell forward onto his hands and knees as his legs buckled, and felt the sharp edge of Shinji's blade against his neck. He saw the orange barrier disappear out of the corner of his eyes, and he saw the seven Vaizard slowly walk over.

"Now that you've lost, would you please explain what this is about?" Shinji asked, his voice human…which meant he had removed his mask. Ichigo let his own mask shatter, unable to keep drawing on the power to keep his face shielded by the porcelain Hollow Mask.

Ichigo felt his heart break in time with his mask, pieces shattering and cracking and falling. He fought to keep control of his voice, he feelings, but tears overflowed from his eyes. He bit his lip, and a sob wracked his body as agony ripped through his breaking heart. "She…" He tried to say, but couldn't manage it. He curled up into a ball on his knees, resting his elbows on the dirt and fisting his hands in his hair.

He knew Shinji had sheathed his blade, and the other Vaizard were right by them. He could almost see their faces in his head, disgusted at his weakness. "She…doesn't…" He choked out, and groaned as he finally said it. "She doesn't want me!" The words brought a fresh agony ripping through his heart, nearly crippling him.

"What?" Shinji asked, clearly confused.

"Rukia." Ichigo whispered. "She…doesn't want me…" Ichigo whispered, squeezing his eyes shut. He didn't want to open his eyes. He wanted to embrace the darkness, he wanted it to submerge him and take him away.

"That's what this is about? About some stupid Shinigami girl?" Hiyori asked, incredulous. Ichigo howled, beyond angry. He sprang at Hiyori, but Shinji grabbed him before he could wrap his hands around her throat.

"SHE'S NOT SOME STUPID SHINIGAMI GIRL!" Ichigo yelled, and Hiyori recoiled and took a step backwards.

"Ichigo…" Shinji warned, his voice deadly calm.

"She…was…everything." Ichigo said, and went limp. Shinji relaxed his grip, letting Ichigo fall to his knees again. Ichigo hung his head, grinding his teeth.

"I…I…" Ichigo stammered, trying to speak past the sobs that wracked his body.

"You gave her everything you were." A soft voice said. Ichigo looked up slowly, and saw that it was Hiyori who had spoken. Her eyes were guarded, and she had her arms crossed over her chest. She pursed her lips, and looked away. "You gave her your heart, you gave her the ability…the control of your life, and she ripped it away?" She asked, not looking at him. Shinji's grip was loose, but not gone. Ichigo nodded pitifully, aware of how messy, dirty, and messed up he looked.

"Yes." He choked out. Hiyori nodded once. "Shinji…take him to his room. He needs rest." She said, and turned and walked away. Shinji stepped in front of Ichigo, locking their gazes, and said, "Follow me." Ichigo nodded slowly, and stumbled after Shinji as Shinji led him from the training room. He didn't go to retrieve Tensa Zangetsu…he just stumbled up the stairs after Shinji.

Shinji led him to a door near the back of the first floor, and Ichigo blinked in confusion. Shinji didn't say anything, but opened the door. Shinji motioned for Ichigo to go in. Ichigo stepped in, and he blinked as Shinji flipped on a light. The room he was in had a King-sized bed with a black comforter, black pillows, and black polished wood furniture. A cushioned chair against the far right side, a black end-table with a lamp on it while it stood next to the bed, and it had a black wardrobe on the farthest wall from Ichigo. Ichigo realized that his body was under the covers of his bed, tucked in.

"We were planning to present you your room tonight anyway…but then this whole Arrancar thing happened." Shinji explained. Ichigo nodded dumbly. "Thank you…" He whispered. Shinji gave him a half-smile.

"A few of us know what you're going through, Ichigo. We understand…" Shinji murmured. Ichigo looked at him in surprise. "When you feel you're able, come on out. If you need food, drink, someone to talk to…we're here. Remember, we're family." Shinji said. Ichigo nodded, and blinked in surprise when Shinji backed out of the room and shut the door to leave Ichigo alone. Ichigo went to the lamp, turned it on, went back to the room light switch and turned that off so the only light was the dim lamp. He stumbled to his new bed, synched into his body with a large amount of difficulty, and then cried. He felt black despair crash over him, dragging him down to its crushing depths, and he didn't resurface.

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THAT'S THE END OF THIS CHAPPY! IT was much shorter than usual, wasn't it? Review please! UBER PLEASE!