February 14th

Dear Journal,

I've been feeling guilty all week...and worried. Kyle Langley disappeared Tuesday. Everyone is worried except those who should be. The elder's keep telling everyone it's all right, that he'll be back soon. The boy-pack has been skipping out on classes too. When the boy-pack is at school, they are always looking at Jason and Me. It freaks Jason out a lot. It makes me nervous. I know of Jason's history. I was smart enough to figure out about Jacob.

He's a werewolf. That's how he stayed so young. In all the legends, those who...phase more stay younger longer. I'm pretty sure it has something to do with his wife, Renesemee. Grandpa called her a "hybrid", I don't know what that means though.

Monday night, Jason came over to study. Caden didn't come that night. I was relieved. I don't want him to think he has a chance with me just because I let him kiss me. I mean, he's a VAMPIRE! Yes, I can say it now: V-A-M-P-I-R-E. And that should scare the heck out of me; sometimes it does when he sniffs my skin and hair.

Plus, I know I am much happier with Jason. It's real emotion. When I'm with Caden, I know he is using some kind of vampire spell to seduce me. And it's not me! Well, it is, but it's not who I want to be.

Tuesday, when Kyle went missing, Jason was really worried. They were kind of close. Jason said the boy-pack watched Kyle a lot too. And now he's gone. Things are getting so weird. What if Jason goes missing too? Plus, Jason said Jacob has been coming around more "checking up on things". I haven't told Jason that I know about the legends, that they are true. I wonder if he knows.

Wednesday night, Cade was back. He didn't stay long after I woke up. I tried to act really tied (it wasn't hard, I was really tired). He held my hand while I tried to fall asleep to brush him off, but then he brought my hand to his lips, smelling my scent and kissing my wrist. I yanked it away. "Please don't do that," I told him.

He nodded, somehow confused as to why I didn't want to talk to him. Finally he was convinced that I was asleep, though I wasn't. He kissed me on my cheek, jawbone and neck. I shivered and he left. I feel liked I need to talk to something about this. Jacob is coming back tomorrow to see Jason. I plan on being there too.

XoXo Jennifer Heartly