AN: SHORT chapter but POWERFUL. Thank you for your reviews and please please keep reviewing!
Reid stood protectively over his comatose coworker, making sure nothing would ever harm her again. At least not under his watch. At least he hoped not. He hoped he was doing the right thing by putting his friend through unbearable pain in a halfassed effort to save her life.
Because Reid knew deep down JJ's chances of survival were less then acceptable; that if she did survive, and it was a huge IF; the rehab would be extensive and lifelong. He also knew that the JJ he knew would never want to live like this. Would never want to be left in a vegetative state, left dependent on others. But he had to give her a chance to survive… didn't he?
He had hope that JJ would recover, that she could regain her strength and mobility. That she would smile at him and laugh with him again, that she would return to her job a skilled FBI agent. And at first, he truly thought that was a possibility; and then reality struck him hard and fast.
He had seen her scans, her bloodwork, her X-rays and despite his positive thinking it couldn't erase science. And the science was saying that his best friend wouldn't come back.
And he hated it; he hated thinking it and he hated admitting it. But he had to try, he had to try and save JJ's life, even at the cost of her despising him for it later. Because he was not in the position to allow JJ to live or die; that was Will. And only Will.
And Reid knew that Will knew what JJ's will had stated, she had been very clear about it. He and JJ and Will had gone out to dinner days before her abduction and the topic had come up.
"No, listen to me." JJ had smiled as she took a bite of her burger. "If something ever happens to me, I do not want to be dependent on machines for the rest of my life. Just make it easy and let me go. Make sure they take everything, I am an organ donor. But don't let my life depend on machines."
"JJ…" Will had laughed, pulling her into his embrace.
"Will, promise me." Her voice had dropped "promise me you won't do that to me."
"Do what?" He held her tight against his chest.
"Leave me like that, promise me you will let me go."
There had been silence for a moment before Will had placed a kiss on the top of her head. "JJ, why are we talking about this? Are you okay?"
"Of course I am, just with my job, I just want… want my wishes known."
"Okay, JJ. Of course I will honor that," Will had agreed, still not letting go of his wife.
"Spense, I am holding you responsible for this," JJ had looked him straight in the eye and Reid had nodded his understanding.
She had disappeared a few days later, without a trace.
And as Reid thought back on the conversation, his stomach dropped further. He had made a promise to her, and here he was, deliberately breaking it in the off chance she would ever wake up.
And it wasn't fair.
"We will find them, JJ. We will find them," He promised, grabbing her hand in his own as he watched the monitors.
The sedatives had been stopped, with extreme resistance from the doctors, but with a court order in hand, nothing could be done. The staff had refused to stop them cold turkey and instead decided to wean her down a few hours at a time.
She had now been with half the dose of sedatives for over twelve hours. If JJ was going to wake up, if she still had any shot, they would start seeing signs of that at any time. Movement, increase in heart rate, fidgeting, eye fluttering. Something. Anything.
And twelve hours after the sedatives had started to wean; Jennifer Jareau had not given any indication that she would ever come back to them.