A/N: Pam drops the f-bomb quite a bit here. Just thought I'd warn you. Also, I know I told some of you who was in the apartment but I changed it. It's all peppermintyrose's fault. She planted this wicked idea in my head and I decided to run with it. Thanks again to my lovie hearttorn, my fab beta.

Pam's POV

I am not to be fucked with. I don't know why it is that people think that they can just do whatever the fuck they want to whomever the fuck they want, but I am just the bitch to set them straight. I take up for those I love and I love Sookie Stackhouse. She's too sweet to get mad or stay mad at anyone for too long. Granted, she's stubborn as hell and likes to throw a little attitude around, but she never stays upset. I guarantee that when she found Lorena at Bill's apartment she didn't even slap that ho. I know I would have.

What she won't do, I take care of for her, which is why I'm standing over the body of her brother. Yeah, I tasered his ass–twice. Oops! I thought he was that asshole, Compton. Ugh, just thinking his name makes me want to vomit.

Of course, I should have known it was Jason because he wears unusually scented cologne. It's one that I actually happen to like, very much. I had no idea he was here and why he didn't lock the door…guess he just forgot that he's not at home out in the sticks. We lock our doors in the rest of the world.

I really wish it had been that asshat. I'd be kicking him at this point, possibly tasing him again for my personal enjoyment. He thinks he can screw over my friend like he has and not have to face any repercussions? Boy, does he have a thing or two coming. If he thought I was a crazed bitch monster from hell in high school, I will be happy to show him I'm even worse now.

I walk out of the kitchen, back into the living room and sit down on the couch across from Jason. God what I wouldn't do to that man if he'd let me. Sookie knows about my infatuation with her brother, but she doesn't realize that I really, really want to fuck him. I cough to see if it will rouse him, but he doesn't move an inch. He's out cold. I put my finger under his nose to make sure he's still breathing.

I didn't know that I could put him on his ass like I did. He scared the shit out of me, walking up behind me and touching my shoulder. I whipped around faster than he could say "Pam" and I hit him with my stun gun. He jerked a bit, screamed, jerked some more, then hit the floor with a loud thud. I zapped him again when he was lying at my feet for scaring me shitless. I do not scare easily and did not appreciate that. When he wakes up I'll interrogate him, but for now I'll pour myself a glass of wine to calm my nerves.

Fucking Jason Stackhouse. That's what I could be doing right now had he alerted me to his presence like a normal person. Really, who sneaks up behind someone like that? He's lucky I didn't knee him in the nuts.

I wonder who I could call to locate Bill for me. I need to have a little talk with him. If I know anything it's that he won't give up where Sookie is concerned. He's a bit of a stalker. I only know because he tried that shit with me once. We screwed in high school after one of my drinking binges and he thought that meant he was my boyfriend. I have no clue why he would think something so ridiculous, but he did.

I guess some men just can't get over being used for sex. I was drunk and horny–he was there. End of story. I didn't expect him to phone me the next day asking when we could go out. I had never had a boyfriend and I hadn't planned on starting then. He kept calling, showing up at my home uninvited, sending me love notes.

After I thought about it, I realized I must have been his first. That was the only explanation I could come up with for why he was so attached after one night. Not to toot my own horn or anything but TOOT fucking TOOT! I know what I'm doing in the bedroom and I've never had an unsatisfied lover. But no one was as clingy as Dr. Creepy Von Douchenstein. It was times like that when I wished I had an older brother.

I finally put an end to his reign of terror by threatening to cut off his balls and stuff them down his throat. To make sure my point was felt, I pulled out the trusty little switchblade I keep with me. I watched sweat bead up on his forehead as he gulped almost audibly and slowly backed away from me. From that point on, he kept his distance. Until he began his infatuation with Sookie, of course. He developed some kind of thing for her after I turned him away. I'm not sure but I thought it was because no one had bedded her and he was dying to be the first.

Once a guy thinks he has a little control over you, he steps that shit up a notch or two and then you're in trouble. Like Sookie. I tried to warn her but she wouldn't listen. She had such a crush on that assmunch, that I couldn't get her to see reason. I tried to push her towards Eric but she only saw him as "a friend." Apparently Beeell was just the bee's knees to her and she had eyes for no one else.

Jason stirs. His hand goes up to the spot on his neck where I zapped him. It looks like two little teeth marks, almost as if he were bitten by a vampire.

"Pam, why the fuck did you tase me?"

"My sweet, sweet Jason. Why did you sneak up on me? That's why I tased you. What are you doing here anyway?"

"Well, I didn't feel like driving all the way home last night and I knew where Sookie kept her spare key. I replaced it when I came in and made myself at home."

"It would have been nice of you to lock the door you know. I wouldn't have been ready for a fight had I not thought someone was here illegally. I thought you were fuckface. I was so pissed at him that I tased you twice. Serves you right, though." I wink at him. He's so cute when he's flustered.

"Look Pam, I appreciate you caring enough about my sister to check in on her but next time can you make sure it's Bill before you get all zap happy? That shit hurt!"

"Here, let me take a look at that. Did you want some ice or something?"

"How about a stiff drink?"

"I could use a stiff dick right about now. What do you say to a roll in the hay with me?"

"I say you're my sister's friend and if she ever found out she'd kill me."

"Well then I guess she won't find out …"

Bill POV

"Hello there. I'm here to see Linda Stackhouse-Madden please." I throw in a little smile, winking at the redhead behind the desk.

"Sure, and you are?"

"William Compton. I have a three o'clock appointment with her."

"Yes, she's expecting you Mr. Compton. Please have a seat and she'll be right with you."

I sit and wait. I know Linda won't keep me waiting too long because she knows I have something on her. Her secretary alerts me that she is ready and I stroll into her office as if I own the place.

"Bill…" she leers.

"Linda darling! How good to see you."

"Cut the shit Compton, what do you want to know?"

"Well, I have a source that tells me you were at the Stackhouse residence the night Adele Stackhouse took a tumble down the stairs. Now, you wouldn't happen to have any idea how that happened would you?"

"Is that it? You come here with that as your threat?"

"No, not even close. See, Adele and I go way back. I bet she'd be more than happy to tell me what happened that night if I were to share some of my own information with her."

"Oh, and what exactly would that be?"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk, Linda. Do you think I would give up the goods that easily? No. First, you are going to tell me what your plans are for Sookie. Then, you're going to tell me why you pushed your mother down the stairs in her own home and more importantly why she hasn't turned you over to the police."

"I didn't push her. She fell. She wouldn't turn over her only daughter to the police, whether I was guilty of it or not. You have no leverage over me, Bill."

"That's what you think. Should I get Sophie Ann on the phone now, or will you tell me what I need to know?"

"Sophie Ann? What does she have to do with anything?"

"Sophie Ann and I have weekly meetings where she fills me in on what's going on in the world. I hate her fucking guts but that doesn't mean she's not useful."

"She's your boss. How can she be useful to you? Shouldn't it be the other way around?"

"It should be but considering she runs in different circles than I do, well it behooves me to find out as much information as I can, about everyone that I can. You included."

"What would you need or want to know about me? I'm paying you for your services."

"That's exactly my point. You are paying me for something and I want to know what. You don't want to tell me, a digging I will go. I can get information on anyone that I want and I have a bit of information on you that I'm sure you'd rather not get out."

"What kind of information?" She fidgets a bit. It's quite funny actually because Sookie does the exact same thing when she's nervous.

"Something about a paternity test." I twirl my fingers in the air as if I'm searching for the right words.

"What? What lies has she been telling you?"

"That's not important right now. What is important is what you are planning with Sookie. So, out with it." She takes a deep breath and sinks back into her chair. I think I have her now.

"It's all quite simple really. I was planning to make her look bad in the eyes of my mother so that she would leave the company to me. Jason doesn't want any part of the business and Sookie is the only other competition that I have."

"That's it?"

"Yes." Bullshit.

"There has to be more to it than that. I mean, why have me date her, take her virginity?"

"That's personal and none of your business. I don't care what you drag out at this point because I still won't tell you. You can go to hell." She's not going to budge, so I move on to something else.

"So you didn't push Adele down the stairs?"

"No, I did not push my mother down the stairs. She fell."

"All on her own?"

"Bill…"

"When I talked to her she sure seemed shaken up about it all."

"Wait, you talked to her? When? Is she all right?"

"Of course, she was my first stop before I came to see you. She's fine so no need to worry. I can check in on her anytime you know."

"You bastard! Whatever she told you was… She's an old woman and her mind's slipping so you can't believe a word that she says. I didn't push her. I just…she was running away from me and I reached out to her. I was just trying to turn her around so that she could talk to me. I didn't realize we were close to the stairwell when…She went tumbling down the stairs and I tried to grab her to stop her from falling. I swear I didn't push her. She told me to go. She told me to leave and that she would be okay. See, she didn't want anyone to think that I had pushed her either. She's my mother and I love her, no matter how unfair she may have been to me. Did I think about it? Yes, but I didn't and would never have gone through with it." Ask and ye shall receive.

"Linda, Linda, Linda…you are more gullible than your niece. I never went to see Adele. I'm sure she knows that Sookie and I have had a falling out and she wouldn't tell me squat. Now Sophie Ann on the other hand, she would tell me whatever I wanted to know."

"You son of a bitch. How dare you? Why would Sophie Ann tell you anything?"

"That's for me to know. Now, what shall we do about who is running things again?"

****

"So, Sophie Ann…can I ask why you and Linda are working so closely together?"

"You can ask but it doesn't mean that I will answer." She does not know about my methods of persuasion nor is she keeping track of the number of drinks she's had. I refill her wine glass. Doesn't take her long to get tipsy enough to loosen her inhibitions.

"Okay, that's fair enough. I just want to know what I'm up against. Is she as ruthless as you are or is she a nice kitty?"

"She's definitely ruthless. I'll tell you one thing. She's so worried that someone will find out she's cheated on Victor and that their daughter may not be his." Her speech is slurred, but not enough that I can't make out every word she's just said. Now I have my leverage.

"Why would she be worried?"

"Well, it isn't so much about the paternity of Hadley as it is that she cheated on Victor. He put something into their prenuptial agreement about it. She'll be left with nothing if he ever found out."

"How did you find out?"

"Well my darling, as I'm sure you've noticed, one will tell their bed partner anything." Well, well…it seems there's more to Linda than I could have imagined. I cannot wait to see her later on today.