Swearing and hints at sexual content.

When Jace ushered Clary into a car and strapped her in she was too shocked to even notice the fact that he was speeding, too still to question their rush. The ride itself was silent and came to her in flashes. As Clary stared at her hands, drenched and stained in the red of a life that she had no right taking...she cried. It wasn't quiet or unnoticeable either. It was uncontrollable sobbing that had her falling farther into her seat, trying to make herself disappear and rebirth into a better person. Because she was terrible. She was despicable.

Stop pitying yourself you worthless piece of trash.

You killed that man.

Live with it.

Her sobs turned into hiccups and she didn't understand why all of a sudden she felt the guilt, like a little seed, burrow into her heart. She much rather preferred the anger, she decided. It was a lot easier to handle. In those single moments in that car she felt so vulnerable and young that she was surprised, tamed into silence, and even the little voice that was always nagging in the back of her head was silent.

For a minute she felt human.

A full minute.

60 seconds.

And then it was gone.

Clary came back to herself as Jace screeched into a parking space, almost sending them into a fishtail on the slippery road. He didn't try to be inconspicuous as he grabbed her arm and shoved her towards his building...his apartment building.

"Why aren't we at the Lightwood's?" she shouted over the rain. It poured in buckets over their heads as they ran up the steps, Jace's hair sticking to his forehead and bending into straight lines. She didn't like his hair like that.

"Because you killed him too loudly Red!" Jace looked at her "How did you manage to not notice the 5 cars that followed us out of that place?" his sneer was venomous.

"We're being chased?!"

"YES RED!" by this time they were at the elevators, shivering and Clary watched as Jace frantically pushed the up arrow. The clicking filled the earily silent lobby, in fact, not even the concierge was waiting at her desk.

Weird. You'll have to ask about that later.

Jace continued to explain, "The Lightwood's are driving to a safe house, leading the men away from us...you. They saw us come out of there Red, and now they want you dead. Most of the cars followed them but at least one caught on to us as well" he paused for a second." WHY ISN"T THIS WORKING?!"and kicked out at the metal doors.

They didn't open.

"Okay Red, this is where all the cardio pays off..." Jace pulled her towards the stairs and up the first couple of flights before they heard the doors bang open and echo below them. Two male voices carried upwards They went up here and Boss told us his room number.

Jace unsheathed his gun from his pants before ascending the next flight.

The tension was thick and rigid in the hallways, and thankfully no one came through the doors on the floors as they ran past, however it wasn't long before the thundering footsteps behind them turned into gunshots. The first one was a ear-shatter boom that made her heart skip a beat and Clary ducked just in time to see it hit the wall where her head would have been, plaster and dust raining like the showers outside.

"Holy shit," whispered Jace as he turned back to check if she was okay, and with all the blood on her face she concluded that his prolonged staring was merely to see what blood was hers or not. He placed a hand on her back and pushed her faster, harder as he exclaimed breathless curses. Another shot was fired but was at least a foot off, hitting the wall above her shoulder.

Jace was right.

They were trying to kill her.

In that moment the guilt she had ignited into anger and she wanted to kill them all, Jonathan, Luke, the gunman, all of them.

She didn't feel human.

She felt awake.

As they passed the next door she opened it and slammed it shut before running quietly to catch up with Jace, who admittedly was confused as shit. She quickly hid him behind the railing on the next flight or stairs and pulled her own gun from her boot before positioning it on her lips, in the silent 'shh' symbol he'd used at her first party. He just scowled and watched as the men , who'd heard the door slam, rushed forward and through it, supposedly "following them".

The silence in the hallway was more terrifying than the the chaos was.

"To buy us time," she whispered, and he nodded before they finally made it to Jace's floor. Across the hall, to the right, a quick swipe of the card and they were in the familiar comfort of his room, cold and still as it was. With the lights on and the cat strutting forward to meet them it felt secure. Safe.

"We're not out of the clear yet," Jace said, "Those men said they knew where my room was, they'll be here."

"And we'll be ready, right?" she panted out, hands that were red and pasty white now on her knees as she tried to catch her breath.

Jace smiled dark and mysteriously before striding towards his closet. Sliding back his coats he revealed a panel of guns. "Fuck yeah."

Jace watched her as she stared at the bodies on the ground, studying her in the way he'd become accustomed to doing.

He couldn't help that she was so interesting, and smart, and strategic, and fucking hot. That was all on her. Honestly, he was the one that had to deal with her eerie mood swings and strange thought processes. He was the one who had to deal with being strangely attracted to a-a...mental patient.

The men had followed them to their room eventually and when they entered the door Red wasted no time before sending a bullet through their heads. She stood now, asking him with those perfect pink lips of hers, where they would put the bodies and he wanted to kiss her so badly that when he actually did he didn't realize that it wasn't a fantasy until they hit the blood soaked wall behind her. Her leg lifted automatically to his hip where his hand caught it a pulled it up further. God, she was heaven. Their tongues twisted in a battle that only they knew, a fight that ended in pleasure for both sides of the war. Her hands were like fire against his skin, sharing the same mind-consuming lust he had building inside him. Her skin, where it met the palms of his hand yielded so perfectly, like she was built for him, and when she groaned again as his lips slipped to taste her neck he honestly couldn't help the thrust of his pelvis against her own.

Her whimper made him stop.

When Jace pulled back he saw the faded bruises all along her legs and wondered for the umpteenth time, what had happened. He wasn't exactly raised in a perfect household, he understood what abuse was like, he knew that each one of those bruises held a story, a tale. Each purple and yellowy discoloration wasn't a flaw but character that she didn't have room to store in her soul, and so stored on her skin. He moved his eyes to her face where blood still flecked across her cheeks like her faint freckles, and darkness festered in her eyes. She was turmoil and chaos. The cuts she had along her neck and arms were just scars that shouted her story. They screamed for her, especially when she couldn't scream herself.

He wanted to kiss every single one.

Pulling away he lowered his eyes and took in the scene before them. "You should take a bath." he heard himself saying. "I'll clean all of this up."

When she turned around he could help but watch her walk away, sweaty strands of her red hair crusted with blood and whatever else she'd encountered that night hanging like a curtain down her back. Her long slim legs hesitated and then paused in her retreat, her spine twisting so she could look at him over her shoulder. Dirty as she was...Jace found her beautiful.

And because he knew what was best for her, because he knew she'd end up hating him in the end anyways, he could never tell her that.

It made his heart ache.

"Maybe...you can join me after you're done?" she said and then smiled and walked away before he even had time to process what she said.

And when he did he regretted it because the effect was painfully obvious hard-on that he got rid of only when he looked at the dead bodies on the ground.

"Fuck. My. Life." he muttered before calling up Alec to take them away and scrubbing down the walls.

Jace was lying to himself though.

Because he didn't hate his life.

He fucking loved it.

Sorry for the long wait again, I find time when I can get it, I swear!

Anyways reviewers: LindsayHonker-Thank you for your review! I'm glad you liked the lemon, it was my first one so I was worried about it :)

AllaceRose- you don't even understand how much you're review like MADE my day. Omg thank you so much.

To the Guest- I hope that this has a hint to what feeling might come. As seen in jace's POV he does have feelings for her but he's hiding them and concealing them as lust. He doesn't want to hurt her but he's also scared of getting hurt. I hope this helps on that front.

little dhampire 13- I probably could have used a better character to be in Luke's position, he's such a good person in the books (and this story) but he has the biggest connection to Jocelyn so it had to be so...Thank yous o much for reviewing!

Arcoirizada-Honestly I can't express how much your reviews mean to me. They are the nicest things anyone has like ever said about my writing and I appreciate them soo much. Thank you!

Anyways keep reading and doing what you do, THANKS for your patience. I sincerely appreciate it :)