14. Strength
A/N: At the timing that I'm writing this, I just published the thirteenth chapter about five minutes ago and the twelfth chapter about an hour or two ago. If this up on the same day, that means I pulled off 3 updates in one day! OMG! :O
~X~
A Jedi's duty was to be the Keeper of Peace, and also to protect those who cannot protect themselves in a time of danger.
Or something like that in Ahsoka's mind.
It wasn't like she understood what she had committed herself to being as, it was just she was more or less used to the part about fighting she nearly forgot sometimes she was also a Keeper of the Peace. She just didn't feel like, which was a bit of a problem for her. Earlier before, she had once asked Barriss what the difference was from that and a warrior, but even she didn't have the answer to that.
All she knew was that she had devoted her life, or at least a huge part of it, to fighting in this war she knew the Republic would win. She was proud to be a part of it, and was filled with joy to those who blessed her after she saved their lives. So many countless people with good hearts.
Though when you're in a relationship, for her, it was always Lux trying to be the one to protect her.
It wasn't that he was weak, it was rather he felt embarassed he couldn't protect his own girlfriend in a battle. But he was also proud to see her graceful and powerful skill when in combat. Though he had never seen her fight before, she had shown him before of her sabre, and it amazed him of how instantly powerful and brave she looked.
Though Ahsoka was a fighter on the outside when it came to battles, it was battles of the mind and heart was when she needed Lux.
She had seen so many things from the start of her young age, such horrors and tragedies not for the faint hearted or those sensitive. She pretended that it never go to her.
But Lux knew the truth.
Sometimes, when she would (if she could) spend the night over, he would hear her cry in her sleep.
He wondered what nightmares she would endure, whether a vision or a nightmare of a past event. The War was known to tear everyone apart.
But it was literally tearing Ahsoka apart mentally. She would make herself seem fine, after all, she had her new cheery attitude to life due to being in love; But sometimes, when she knew no one was looking, she would have a quiet mental breakdown. Silently let the tears fall from her cheeks and not expecting a single person to help wipe away those tears.
But Lux would.
On the nights she would cry, he would stroke her head-tails softly and hush her, wiping away her tears and kissing her forehead softly. He knew she was able to also read thoughts in the Force, and tried to have her read his, of the happy things he tried to think of or at least a positive influence.
But eventually, the dreams bounced from one to the other.
Sometimes, he would dream about her dying, or being expelled from the Jedi Order when they discovered the secret relationship she had with him and then she would fall to the floor and die of shame. There were even the horrible ones where he dreamed that he would kill her, and those very thoughts frightened him.
There was a pleasant dream once, where there was peace, joy, and love. No war, no fighting, no death, no violence. Just things being of a dream world he knew many Jedi would kill for now in this time of war. But what was odd was Lux started to cry silently at the thought, only because of the simple fact that that was not the Galaxy they lived in, and it never would be.
He wished it would, but he knows he has to suck it up for her.
Eventually, the dreams left him as if they got tired from trying to pick on him and went back to Ahsoka, taunting her in her dreams as she slept. But he still stays there by her side, comforting her no matter what. Lux knew he wasn't strong in battle.
But it was the strength he had in his heart that counted.
~X~
Hm...kinda angsty one-shot. Oh well, the themes are always going to vary! It's Star Wars, what can I say? Name one couple that in the real SW universe gets a true happy ending, no dying or awful tragedies. Oh well, more updates to come!