England's List of Worst Fears
5. Being violated by France;
4. That Russia guy;
3. Being stuck with America for too long;
2. Being alone;
1. Being alone in a closet with France, Russia, and America.
Such is life.
But it must go on, oui?
So France and Germany's wedding was only five hours away. The fiances were totes excited, but everyone else was just weirded out.
'Dude, half of that couple raped me in the dark, and I'm supposed to celebrate his wedding?' Poland shouted.
'I know how you feel,' almost everyone replied.
Hungary and America were not there; they were going through some... INTERESTING pictures...
So now England ended up hangin' with Russia and Italy, who were severely depressed and drinking until their cells mutated to survive solely on alcohol and their livers died. It was a very sad sight.
'OIyunewr evrouinewrw,' Italy said before passing out.
Russia, however, was a superhuman, and was now on his two hundredth bottle of vodka (all of that cell mutating and liver dying happened to him CENTURIES ago).
'It's just... it's hard to see France unite with another country,' Russia said. 'I have Italy, da, but...'
'I know,' England said, putting a hand on Russia's shoulder.
'DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME, BITCH, OR I'LL CUT OUT YOUR GODDAMN MIDDLE CLASS.'
LATER...
'You may now kiss the bride-er, man-er... JUST KISS ALREADY,' Ireland said, throwing the Bible out the window. (BLASPHEMY. IT'S IRELAND. WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE DO THAT.)
France and Germany began to make out. (THERE ARE CHILDREN IN THE AUDIENCE. STOP IT.)
'CONGRATULATIONS,' England said to France. 'NOW YOU DON'T HAVE TO BLOODY RAPE PEOPLE FOR SEX.'
'Oh non, I'll still do that,' France replied. 'Starting with YOU.'
'OH HEY GUYS SORRY WE'RE LATE AND SHIT,' America announced. Hungary was next to him, wearing his clothes.
'And what were YOU TWO DOING?' Austria said.
'NOTHING!' America and Hungary replied.
'OH MY GOD YOU GUYS HAD SEX DIDN'T YOU HOLY SHIT,' Prussia yelled.
'WHAT?' Austria and England shouted.
'... I am SO gonna kill Prussia,' America said.
'WAY AHEAD OF YOU,' Hungary said. She started to beat up Prussia, and soon Prussia's retard bird was cooked and eaten. OM NOM NOM.
'Austria?'
'Yes, America?'
'I'm in love with your wife.'
'... GTFO.'
But honestly, is there ANYONE who ISN'T in love with Hungary? HUH? HUH? Yeah, I didn't think so.