They don't leave the courtyard for a week.
Alec claims it's because they need to rest before heading back into New York, but he doesn't take his eyes off the door Clary left from as he says it.
They eat through their rations, portions cut down by spoonfuls while they aren't walking.
Jace spends hours poring over the map, wanting to find them the fastest way back to New York. He marks small towns as he does, places where there may be pockets of survivors or food that hasn't been raided. Alec secretly worries that someday, stored food will run out, or survivors will be picked off in the zombie-rampant city or they'll be picked off.
He doesn't know what they'll do then. They're trying to help people, but the human population of the city is dwindling, and he fears they'll have to retreat to the camps, where they'll eat through the foods there too.
He and Magnus become even closer, working together in journeys to the surrounding area by their new safehouse for more supplies. Alec tries to keep a safe distance while Jace is around, not wanting to rub in the fact that Jace's… Clary left him, but he knows Jace knows.
Jace gets further and further away from Alec, and he just isn't sure how to get him to talk to him again.
It's been eight days and Alec is losing his control on everything around him. The zombies get closer each night, and he knows that they have to leave.
But he can't turn his back on Clary.
"Clary?" Alec awoke suddenly at the sudden noise but managed to stop himself from shooting upright and reaching for his knife when he realises it's just Jace.
He rolls over, away from Magnus who was drooling onto his own arm as he slept and squinted across the courtyard to see Jace sitting just a few meters away from them with the transceiver set in his hand.
Jace was facing away from them but Alec sees how he lifts the radio up to his mouth to transmit again.
"Clary? It's me, Jace." He says softly and Alec rests his head on his arm as he watched his younger brother.
There are a few seconds of static on the receiver and Jace sighs. Alec's heart was aching for him. He'd been dating Magnus barely a week and he already couldn't imagine being away from him, especially not having Magnus storm off into a warzone alone.
"I know you don't want to talk to me." Static. "But I'm sorry." The white noise crackles on and on and Jace sniffs and rubs at his face. Alec knew Jace would be embarrassed beyond belief if he realised he was being watched and stayed silent.
"Just… Press the button. Let me know you're okay and safe. I'm sorry I told you to go."
Jace looks over his shoulder and Alec slams his eyes shut, feigning a long slow breath. A few seconds later, Jace talks again.
"I can't stop thinking of that night. By the apartments and with the flower. The sunflower?" Alec doesn't remember any sunflower, but he continues listening, albeit guiltily.
"Fuck, you looked so beautiful in the moonlight, you're always beautiful. I wish we could do that again, I wish you hadn't left."
The receiver crackles for almost a minute as Jace waits eagerly for an answer.
"I wish you were here." Jace is talking so softly that Alec has to strain to hear him.
"I miss you." The radio clatters to the floor as Jace buries his face in his hands.
Alec shuffles around and rolls back over towards Magnus and his heat, giving his brother time to grieve.
He closes his eyes, but Jace doesn't speak again.
Alec doesn't bring it up the next day.
It's day eleven when Alec finally admits that they have to get back to the city and its food before they starve.
They pack up their camp and don their backpacks again, and Alec swear it gets heavier with very step they take.
They walk for almost ten hours each day, and sleep for just about the remaining fourteen.
But the shops begin to hold food again and the houses they kick through have cans and bags of rice and pasta in cupboards and Alec can eat without worrying.
It's been fourteen days since Clary left them, and the first time that their receiver finally begins to crackle with static.
Magnus has his gas burner out because it's dangerous to light a proper fire in the back of the café they're in, and Alec was re-organising his first aid kit out of lack of anything useful to do.
He had thought that Jace was asleep on the cushioned benches running along the wall but as soon as the radio pops and a ''Hello? Hello?'' comes through, Jace flings himself up and off the chair.
He snatches up the receiver, even though it was right next to Alec, and presses the button immediately.
"Hello? Clary? We're receiving you, over." Alec scoots closer to hear the transmission clearer and Magnus abandons his cooker to place a reassuring hand on Alec's shoulder.
"Hello, this is the Northern settlement, can you hear us? Over." The voice on the other end is not Clary's and Jace bits on his lip hard, so hard that Alec can see blood bubbling up.
"Is this Clary?" Jace demands and his grip on the walkie-talkie is white-knuckled.
"No, my name is Raphael. I'm the leader of the settlement." Next to Alec, Magnus gasps and his hand squeezes Alec's shoulder. When Alec looks at him, Magnus' eyes are wide, but he shakes his head when Alec opens his mouth to question him.
Alec has so many questions but at the moment, Jace has a stranglehold on the receiver and zero thought to anyone else.
"We found this receiver on a zombie. Do you know a Jace? Over."
Alec sees Jace's face fall, and the horror on his face. Out of desperation, he reached for the receiver and held it up to his mouth.
"Was the zombie a female?" Alec tried helplessly and the static that returns on the line is deafening.
"No." Raphael replies finally. "A boy with white hair. We think he was Jace?"
The sudden wave of relief that crashes over Jace's face breaks Alec's heart. The other boy crumples to the floor to listen in, his chest heaving.
Alec knew what Raphael was talking about at least. Him and Jace had a matching set of walkie-talkies that were labelled by Maryse after the two of them wouldn't stop fighting about whose was whose. He was holding the ''Alec'' one in his hand, and Clary had been sent off with Jace's set.
"That wasn't Jace. Has anyone called Clary arrived there?"
There was another pause before there was a reply and Alec wasn't sure if the radio was struggling with signal or whatever radios ran on, or if the other boy was trying to pick his words carefully as he gave them bad news.
"There's no one by that name here. We haven't had new arrivals in a few days, although she… may be still on her way. If you or your group in the city, I strongly advise you leave to join us. We have a community and plenty of food."
Magnus took what felt like the first breath he'd had in days. Clary wasn't safe, but she wasn't dead. None of them had any idea of where she could be, or why some boy had her radio so close to the settlement. Magnus was still relieved; he should've known she was tougher than any of them thought. He wanted her to be okay, but there were other pressing matters to attend to now.
He held a hand out for the radio and Alec gave it to him without complaint.
"Are you Raphael Santiago?" Magnus asked and bit his lip waiting for the answer.
"Yes. How do you know me?" The boy on the other line replied suspiciously, and even Alec was looking at him in confusion. Jace was staring at the floor trying to calm his breathing, seemingly zoned out of the whole conversation.
"It's Magnus. Are you okay? You got to the settlement?"
"Magnus? Old Man Magnus?" Goddamnit, Raphael was making him look uncool in front of his new friends. "I'm fine, obviously. Are you still in the city?"
"I cannot believe you left me alone in the city." Magnus ignored his question in favour of grilling his old friend.
"I said I was going!" Raphael argued back and Magnus rolled his eyes, wondering if they could make the trip again just to strangle Raphael.
"You said we might go and then you left in the middle of the night." There was a long pause and Alec nudged him.
"You gotta say 'over'." He prompted even though Magnus knew Alec had forgotten to that for the whole of his conversation.
"You left in the middle of the night. Over." He amended. There was another long pause and Magnus knew Raphael was trying to find a way to dig himself out of the hole he was in.
"I guess it could be seen that way." Raphael replied infuriatingly and Alec seemed to be hiding a smile. "I'm glad you're okay though, old man. Over."
Magnus made a grumpy noise. "Me too. Over."
"You should come up to us. It's not safe in the city. We have weapons up here, and a fence."
"A fence?" Magnus snorted and Raphael huffed but he knew what Raphael meant.
"We need to find Clary." Jace said firmly and Alec left Magnus' side to wrap an arm around Jace. Jace leaned in to hide his face in Alec's shoulder and Alec watched Magnus from the floor, his expression more anxious than Magnus had ever seen it.
"I can't hang around all day, old man. Should we keep an eye out for you or not? Over."
Magnus still couldn't quite believe that Raphael had left to seek safety in the settlement a few months earlier and was now somehow running the whole thing.
"We have to find the other member of our party but then the plan is to travel to you. I'll see you soon Raphael. Over and out."
"I say over and out, Mag-" Magnus quickly shut the radio off, and knelt beside his boyfriend and his friend.
"We don't know if she's dead yet." Alec was saying gently and Jace, curled up into a ball of self-deprecation and worry, sniffled. Magnus immediately forced himself to forget it had happened.
"We don't know if she's alive." Jace said thickly. Magnus had no reply for that and lay a hand on Jace's back instead.
The three of them sat like that until the pot of water and pasta boiled over and Magnus' feet were dead and filled with the same static as the radio receiver.
Magnus was the only one to move to stop their dinner burning and as he did, he prayed for the first time in a very long time for Clary to be safe and okay.