A/N: I dedicate this chapter to almostinsane and Mr. Martin :)
Caveat: This chapter contains religious tones.
Disclaimer: Mass Effect, the Mass Effect universe, and the characters within, all belong to BioWare. St. Joseph of Cupertino and other biblical characters belong to humanity.
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Last Rites
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Chapter 14: The Commander
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— St. Joseph of Cupertino, have mercy on this soul of mine. Even if I reek of sin, help me find peace with God.
He is kneeling in his personal quarters, hands clasped together holding a rosary, arms resting on his bed.
— Please extend your protection over me and my squad. For tonight we will be staring at Death's face.
He is already clad in his armor, except for the helmet. He never felt comfortable praying with his helmet on.
— Should our lives end tonight, help us in the moments of our final breaths that we may ask God for absolutions to our sins.
Joker had told him that they will arrive at the Omega 4 Relay in less than 30 minutes. He had asked the squad members to gather when they're 5 minutes away.
— We have blood on our hands. We have been unclean. But please consider our sacrifices of our own blood, for the sake of humanity, as the price we willingly pay for our iniquities.
Miranda had returned to her own quarters to suit up. He had decided to take a shower, suit up, and... pray his own private last rites.
— Tonight, more blood will be shed. But please extend a protection over our abducted crew. Let no harm befell them for you are the patron of all spacefarers.
He had suited up with a heavy heart. He is not a stranger to deadly missions. But now, this particular mission... there's something different from all the missions before.
— We do not expect our survival. But I do ask that you intercede on our behalf, for God to grant us steady hands and sure steps. So that we can successfully carry out this mission and save all humanity.
He does not fear death. As a marine, he's trained to expect one during each battle. He does not fear failure. As an N7, failure is not in his dictionary.
But time has changed.
— But should it be God's will for us to keep our lives, then guide us from mistakes that will cause unnecessary deaths. And in our times of great needs, do allow miracles to happen, just like miracles happened upon you.
This is his greatest fear: The fear of losing his love. The fear that their life together will be quashed before it even has the chance to bloom. The fear that, having consummated their love, life will deal him yet another heart break.
— Thank you for listening to the prayers of your son, St. Joseph. As it was in your life, let it happen in ours: May God's will be done. Amen.
His voice is breaking. He feels his eyes getting moist as the consequences suddenly become vividly clear.
He tightens his grip on his rosary. As he does that, he suddenly recalls how he got that rosary. It's a gift from her. She bought it at Illium after they stopped her father from reclaiming her sister.
A teardrop slowly makes its way down his left cheek. Then another on his right cheek. Soon his body is shaking from the release of his pent up emotions.
— Hail Mary, full of grace.
— Our Lord is with you.
— Blessed are you among women,
— and blessed is the fruit of your womb,
— Jesus.
— Holy Mary, Mother of God,
— pray for us sinners,
— now and at the hour of our death.
— Amen.
He slumps on the bed as his crying graduated to sobbing.
How he wishes he could avoid the inevitable.
For inexplicable reasons, his mind wanders to the story of the Good Samaritan.
Samaritans had been, during the time of the Gospels, treated as second class citizens. Outcasts. Heretics.
But that particular Samaritan did not hesitate to help the injured, robbed man. A man that undoubtedly was part of the society that ostracized them.
The Samaritan didn't care. He saw a need, and he rose to the call for help. Even spending a sizable amount of money to ensure that the injured man will recover.
Cerberus, through the Lazarus Cell, is the Samaritan. And he, the injured, robbed man.
He smiles. Somehow, that line of thought comforts him greatly.
Still kneeling, he straightens up his body, and closes his last rites with the one prayer he always is very fond of.
— Our Father, Who is in heaven,
— Holy is Your Name;
— Your kingdom come,
— Your will be done,
— on earth as it is in heaven.
— Give us this day our daily bread,
— and forgive us our sins,
— as we forgive those who sin against us;
— and lead us not into temptation,
— but deliver us from evil.
— Amen.
He makes the sign of the cross, and stands up.
He visits the sink to wash the traces of tears from his face.
Grabbing his helmet, he leaves his quarters and waits for the elevator.
He is now ready.
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Author's Note: Shepard is still a man, after all.
Short-ish, I know. Still longer than Chapter 1, though :) ... But as the capstone of the crew on Normandy, I don't think Shepard's chapter needs to be long to be significant.
If you find the overtly religious tone of this chapter unsettling, then my apologies. This is how I had *my* Shepard in mind, after all. Besides, Ashley's not the only one who can be religious, right? :)
St. Joseph of Cupertino indeed exists. He *is* the patron saint of aviators, paratroopers, and astronauts. Go check out his interesting life on Wikipedia.
Thanks for reading! Now, please don't forget to leave me a review :D
Next chapter: A broker tries to offer a prayer.
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