Thanks for the reviews. It was great to hear from so many new readers! :)
Special thanks to Katharine for pointing out that Sam was more likely stationed in Seoul, South Korea (which incidently would make an awesome crossover). ;)
Chapter 14.
That evening Jack waited for Kate to come by his office.
He checked her mother's room after closing it up at eight but when he found no sign of her there either he was forced to leave without saying goodbye.
It had started raining some time during the day; as he drove home with the windshield wipers on, hunched over the steering wheel so that he could see the road ahead, he hoped that wherever she was, she hadn't got caught in it.
Once he reached his apartment, he took a hot shower and warmed a carton of leftover take out in the microwave so that he could an early night. He wanted to be at his best for her mother's surgery. It wasn't just his career that was at stake this time. He couldn't afford for anything to go wrong.
He was just about to sit down in front of the TV to eat when there was a knock at his door, loud and insistent.
"Kate?" he said, staring at her in confusion when he opened it to find her standing out in the hall, soaking wet and shivering, tiny droplets of water sliding from her long hair, down to the carpet at her feet.
"Where did you get this address?" he asked, still in shock. He'd been careful never to invite her back to his place, afraid of what might happen, of what his father would say if he knew.
"I looked you up," she confessed, her teeth chattering, wrapping her arms tighter around herself to keep warm. "I needed to see you. Can I come in?"
It was breaking every rule, every boundary that he'd set for their relationship, but against his better judgement, he found himself stepping back.
He couldn't leave her out there to freeze, he reasoned. He would give her the chance to warm up and then he would send her back where she came from.
"How did you get here?" he asked her, wondering how she'd managed to get so wet between a cab and the entrance to his building.
"I walked," she explained, moving past him into the apartment, and as he got his first good look at her, he saw that she was crying, her tears mingling with the rain on her cheeks.
He felt his stomach clench with fear as he went over each of the possibilities. What if he was too late and her mother was already dead? What if she'd withdrawn permission for the operation? What if Tom had changed his mind and come back to try to patch things up with her?
"Hey, what happened?" he prompted her once the door was closed behind them, cupping her shoulders in his palms so that he could study her expression.
He could see that she was trying hard to hold herself together but rather than answer right away her face crumpled with anguish and she shook her head. "They lied, Jack."
He'd never seen her so distressed about anything, Tom's affair and her mother's illness included; he tried to follow what she was telling him, but on its own, it didn't make any sense. "Who lied? Who's they, Kate?"
"My parents," she choked out, sucking in a deep breath. "My dad – Sam – he's not…" She trailed off, struggling to compose herself. "He's not really my father. Some guy named Wayne is."
He blinked at her, stunned, aware that he should say something but at a loss as to what. If what she'd just announced to him was true then no amount of words could make it better for her.
"Why don't you sit down while I get you a towel?" he told her, steering her into the living room, to the couch, where she would at least be more comfortable. "Then you can start again from the beginning."
She flashed him a grateful smile when he returned with one that he'd found in the hall closet.
"Are you sure?" he pressed gently, perching on the coffee table opposite her so that their knees were just touching, watching her wring the moisture out of her hair. "How d'you know all this?"
"I found an old picture of Sam in Korea while my mom was pregnant with me," she admitted, "so I asked him about it, and that's what he told me."
She let the towel sink to her lap as fresh tears sprang to her eyes. "How could they do that? How could they lie to me like that?"
It hurt him to see her so broken. "I don't know," he agreed with a sad smile.
On impulse, he reached out a tentative hand to stroke her cheek with the backs of his fingers. "God, Kate, I am so sorry," he murmured, wishing that he had something more to offer her than just his sympathy. "I can't even imagine how painful that must've been for you."
She leant into it, closing her eyes, and before he knew what she was doing, her lips found his in a kiss that was fierce and tender, desperate and sweet.
It was exactly the kind of contact that he'd been longed for but he couldn't help wondering if it was really about him. She was hurt and confused. He wasn't sure that he could trust her to understand what she was feeling.
He forced himself to break it, his heart heavy with disappointment as he said, "Come on. I'll drive you back to the motel."
He moved to stand, stopping when she used his hand to pull him back down. "No. Please, Jack?" she insisted. "Can't I just stay here with you?"
He knew that he shouldn't let her, that he was playing a dangerous game just by allowing her to cross the threshold of his apartment, but he could see that she wasn't ready to go back and face her parents yet and he wasn't ready for her to leave either.
He needed to be sure that she was okay first.
"We should get you out of those wet clothes…" he told her, stalling for an answer; he hadn't meant anything by it except that he was concerned about her catching cold but she took the opportunity to kiss him again, nipping at his bottom lip as she tugged on his shirt.
This time when he pulled away, he caught her hands in his, holding them at his sides to stop her. "You can stay, but you and me – this, Kate – is not gonna happen," he warned her. "Not tonight."
He would do whatever he could to help her, but he wasn't going to let her use him as a distraction. She deserved better than that. They both did.
He dropped a gentle kiss to her forehead when she averted her eyes, ashamed, and got up, heading down the hall to his bedroom where he dug out his old college sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants that he hoped wouldn't be too big.
"Here." He pressed them into her hands, taking the damp towel from her and replacing it with a fresh one. "Bathroom's to the left if you wanna take a shower."
"Okay," she agreed with a tight smile, her freckled cheeks flaming as she rushed out of the room, but as guilty as he felt for embarrassing her, he knew that he would have felt worse if he'd given in.
When almost twenty minutes passed and she still hadn't emerged he found himself growing anxious. He didn't think that she would try to hurt herself, he couldn't be sure. She was unpredictable in her state of mind and that scared him.
In the end, his concern for her won out over his resolve to give her her privacy and he went to the bathroom to check on her.
"Kate?" he called, rapping on the door. "Is everything okay in there?"
There was a long pause; he pressed his ear to the wood, listening, relieved when she insisted, "Everything's fine. I'll be out in a minute."
As he lingered there, he heard a muffled sob escape her throat and he knew that she'd been crying and was trying to hide it; he wandered into the kitchen, feeling helpless because there was nothing that he could do for her.
He couldn't go back in time, and even if he could, there was nothing about her that he would change. She was perfect, whoever her father was. He just wished that he could tell her that.
"Jack?" He turned at the sound of his name to see her standing in the doorway behind him, looking like her old self only more dishevelled, his oversized clothes making her thin frame appear even smaller and more delicate.
"What is it?" she asked, crinkling her nose when he handed her a mug, and watching her shake back her sleeve to free her fingers, he smiled.
"Hot chocolate. My mom used to make it for me when I was having a bad day."
"It's gonna take more than hot chocolate to turn this day — this month —around," she insisted, but the corners of her lips lifted, the sight of her smile after what she'd just been through warming his heart.
"Thank you, for this—" She gestured to her mug "—and for just being there," she said, her voice soft and sincere. "I don't know what I'd be doing right now if I hadn't met you."
"You're welcome," he agreed, touched that he'd been able to make a difference, even if it didn't feel like enough.
As she stood there in front of him, holding his gaze, he wanted to kiss her, like he had so many times, but he didn't, tearing his eyes from hers and leading the way back out into the living room instead.
He sank onto the couch, expecting her to take the other end, surprised when she set her mug down on the coffee table and curled into the space beside him, her head drooping onto his shoulder, her palm resting against his stomach.
It should have been awkward, but it wasn't, not when he'd missed the warmth of another body against his, when he was enjoying having her so close.
"What're you gonna do now?" he asked her when he recovered himself, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her in so that their position was more natural.
She was in sore need of comfort: surely there was no rule against him giving it to her? It wasn't professional, but it was innocent enough provided that they didn't take it any further.
He raised his hand, combing his fingers through her damp curls.
She'd borrowed his shampoo, he noted, deciding that be liked the scent better of her.
He liked his sweatshirt better on her too. There was something about seeing her there in his apartment, in his clothes that felt so right.
"Are you gonna try to find this Wayne guy?"
"I don't think so," she told him, her eyes drifting shut as the soothing sensation washed over her. "Sam may not be my father, but he's still my dad. I just need to find a way to forgive him."
He sat there stroking her hair, listening to the even sound of her breathing as the tension left her and she began to relax until the growl of his stomach reminded him that he hadn't gotten around to finishing dinner.
"Hey, Kate? Have you eaten?" he checked, realising that with everything else that was happening, he hadn't thought to find out if she was hungry.
When she didn't respond, he glanced down at her still features, seeing that she was asleep. "Let's get you into bed, huh?" he told her even though he wasn't sure that she could hear him, tucking an errant lock of dark hair behind her ear with a tender smile.
She looped her arms around his neck when he lifted her up off the couch, clinging to him instinctively as he carried her into the bedroom.
As he peeled back the covers and eased her down, he couldn't resist placing an impulsive kiss against her lips, knowing that she wouldn't remember it in the morning.
"Jack?" she mumbled with a sleepy smile and he froze when it occurred to him that he she might not be as senseless as he'd thought.
"Yeah?"
"I'm glad I came here tonight," she told him and he relaxed.
"Me too," he agreed, grinning as he switched off the lamp. "Night."
"I really like you," she continued before he could leave the room, slurring the syllables together with exhaustion, and he let out a soft chuckle at how chatty she was, wondering if she was even aware of what she was saying.
It was endearing, but then as far as he was concerned, so were most of the things that she said and did.
"I think…" Her voice dropped to barely above a whisper, coming out as a kind of sigh and he had to lean in close to catch the rest, her next words almost stopping his heart "…I love you."
Next chapter: The next morning... ;)