Landsmeet...
Loghain knelt before her, beaten, and bleeding. He fought to regain breath enough to speak. "I underestimated you, Warden. I thought you were like Cailan, a child wanting to play at war. I was wrong. There's a strength in you that I have not seen anywhere since Maric died. I yield."
Ravenna stared into his steely eyes. She believed Loghain was half mad, dangerous. It's not my right to take his life, and Maker, I'm tired of dealing death. For a moment longer, she considered carrying out his execution immediately. When her voice rang through the hushed Landsmeet chamber, the words she spoke seemed strange. "I accept your surrender."
Alistair shoved his way to her side, livid and disbelieving. "I didn't just hear you say that. You're going to let him live? After everything he's done? Kill him, already!"
Ravenna fixed him with her gaze, wanting to cuff him for being such an oblivious idiot. Acting like a spoiled child in front of the people who hold our fates in their hands.
"Wait! There is another option!" Riordan stepped to Alistair's side. Ravenna thanked the Maker for the distraction from Alistair's disgraceful outburst. "The teyrn is a warrior and general of renown. Let him be of use. Let him go through the Joining."
She knew better than to hope someone else would solve one of her problems, but Riordan's plea was beyond weak. For politics, I have to entertain this. Alistair's just demonstrated that I'm the one calling his shots. They're considering his claim based on my actions now. She didn't want her hesitation to allow Alistair an opening to speak, but there was little she could say. "Would that even work? He's not exactly loyal to us."
"What does loyalty matter? We are what we are." Riordan's cynicism appealed to Ravenna, and she had to force herself not to laugh. The senior Gray Warden continued, but his voice was pitched lower. This was a plea to her personally, not a performance for the Landsmeet. "The joining binds us to the darkspawn. You know this. If you were to forswear your oath and flee today, you'd find yourself in the Deep Roads or the Blight-lands, given time. You'd seek them out, or they'd seek you."
Anora stepped forward to add her plea to Riordan's. "The Joining itself is often fatal, is it not? If he survives, you gain a general. If not, you have your revenge. Doesn't that satisfy you?" Ravenna misliked the hope in her tone. Hope could inspire people to fight, even when the cause was lost.
Again, Alistair drew all eyes to him with an outburst, "Absolutely not! Riordan, this man abandoned our brothers and then blamed us for the deed! He hunted us down like animals. He tortured you!" Alistair turned to Ravenna. His tone promised violence, whether she condoned it or not. "How can we simply forget that?"
Very well. If he won't be stopped, I must appear to be directing him. I couldn't let him live, anyway. "No, Logain has to die for his crimes, Riordan. It is not my place to perform this execution, however." Ravenn nodded to Alistair and stepped back.
Alistair strode forward and delivered the blow. He paid no heed to the final words exchanged between Anora and her doomed father. A splash of his blood painted the Queen's cheek and she fell to her knees. Ravenna watched unflinchingly, and silently applauded Anora's performance.
When the votes were cast, all but one were in support of Alistair. Ravenna made a mental note to have the Bann watched, dealt with if necessary. The instant change in Alistair's confidence and posture surprised her, and while he held captive the attention of Ferelden's powerful men and women, her eyes sought the darkest corner. Zevran met her gaze, flourished a bow and melted from the room, drawing the attention of no one. She wanted nothing more than to accompany him. The crowd was too loud and pressed too close. She had been forgotten, and Cauthrien's drying blood was no longer enough to keep silk and satin-wrapped bodies from brushing against her.
Finally, she could take no more. She brushed her way through the crowd and stood at Alistair's side, placing a hand on his arm. "Enough, my King. Take command of your army so we can end this blight."
Alistair's confidence wavered. "Er. Right. Rally the men! We march for Redcliffe and victory over the Blight!"
Ravenna stalked out of the Landsmeet on Alistair's heels, but no one had any doubt who was leading.
Leliana walked beside Ravenna through the halls of the castle. The redhead had ambushed her as soon as she finished speaking with Riordan. Alistair brushed past them, clearly preoccupied with the earth-shattering news that one of the three of them must die or the blight would not end. This, on the heels of learning that the archdemon was on Denerim's doorstep. The news didn't surprise Ravenna, somehow. She would find a way to hold Alistair back and take the blow herself if Riordan failed. Her fate seemed sealed, and she was calm.
Ravenna allowed Leliana to link arms with her as they walked through the halls of Redcliffe castle. In silence, they traveled to a more remote wing of the building. When she judged it private enough for a chat, Leliana spoke. "So, we are Arl Eamon's guests, once again. I suppose we shall be leaving very soon, but this is becoming a familiar situation. It seems he hasn't realized his opportunity to be the man behind the throne has passed." Leliana's musical voice was quiet, but Ravenna wished she wouldn't say such things under the man's own roof.
"So it seems."
"For someone destined to become a Queen, and a powerful one at that, you do not seem pleased."
"I'm not. Alistair took the throne so he could watch Loghain die. He's not the biddable oaf that many seem to believe, yet he's not a politician, or even a tactician. And I won't be Queen. I won't marry him." I won't survive to, even if I wanted that. Ravenna saw no reason to share Gray Warden secrets with the former bard, especially when they would only upset her.
Leliana's horror and shock were almost comical, "But why not? He loves you, and you... Oh, Ravenna, you can't be serious!"
Stopped in the middle of the corridor and held her arms out. "Look at me! I'd be an absolute laughingstock!" For once, she was not dressed in steel and leather. Her muscular build was unsuited to the borrowed clothing she wore. She appeared bulky and awkward in the conservative Ferelden styles and Orlesian fashion was out of the question for the political statement it would be seen to represent. To nail the point home, she held up her hand and waved her diminished fingers before her and Leliana had the decency to look abashed. "Besides, already, there are whispers that his ascension is part of a Gray Warden plot to seize power."
"Why, that's rubbish. And it's that dress that's to blame, not you. Perhaps a dress that exposed more of your shoulders would be more flattering. Gloves to hide your poor fingers. And with the right shoes, you would be the picture of femininity."
"I have scars. Everywhere. I look amazing in men's clothing, but the Queen is expected to wear dresses, I hear. But clothes don't matter. When Alistair realizes he has his pick of women, he'll be relieved I turned down his proposal."
"He proposed? And you refused? Oh, my dear! This is awful. You are ruining my story!"
"I didn't, but I'm going to. If we both live to see the coronation, that will be soon enough."
Leliana clearly disapproved, but Ravenna was grateful that she didn't continue to argue. "I'm tired, Leli. It's been good to talk with you again."
"Maker grant that this won't be the last time. Good night, my friend. I hope you change your mind." The Orlesian woman pecked Ravenna's cheek and turned back to her own quarters.
Never. Even if we both survived somehow. As the King's whore, I'd get more respect than I would as the Queen. From the King as well as his Kingdom. Part of her secretly hoped that Alistair would tire of her quickly. She felt obligated to support him, even if that meant making him her puppet, but being under constant scrutiny was breaking her down. Many of her wounds were too fresh, and others too deep, for her to be comfortable with so many eyes on her.
One foolish Bann's daughter had even approached her to ask her about the time she spent in the Fort. The girl had romanticized the 'daring rescue' and pictured the prison as similar to being locked in one's room. Ravenna spoke to the girl for fifteen minutes, drawing several other listeners. She wasn't sure what effect her account had on the men and women present, and she didn't care. It was more than a relief to leave Denerim after that, and she dearly regretted speaking of something so personal and horrific in mixed company.
One of the torches outside her quarters was out. From the shadows, a figure emerged, startling her. "Zevran, you're lucky I'm so foolishly unarmed."
"Hush, mia cara. All is well. You have a visitor in your room. I thought you would wish to know." He bowed slightly and walked away.
"Wait, that's it? You weren't lurking in the shadows just to tell me that."
"Of course not. I intended to be the one awaiting your return. Imagine my irritation when I learned I was not the first to have the idea. When I realized I was beaten, I couldn't decide what to do with myself. I believe I shall spend some time on the roof."
Ravenna raised an eyebrow. "I suppose I have an audience to keep, but some air would be refreshing. Maybe later..." She trailed off, watching his reaction, wondering what game he was playing. Maybe he's heard something. Maybe he knows about the sacrifice somehow. Or maybe... I've told no one except Leliana about my intent to refuse Alistair, but somehow I don't believe that precludes Zevran from knowing.
A crooked smile quirked his lips. "I expect to be there long into the night." Once more, he turned to leave.
"Who beat you to my chambers?" Eamon told Alistair that he wasn't allowed to bed his consort under this roof anymore. I doubt he'd disobey his dear uncle. And after Riordan's news, I can't imagine him doing anything but fretting, pacing all night long.
"Not your lover, or I may not have chosen to wait meekly in the shadows, as I did."
Ravenna held his gaze for a moment, wondering how that might have played out. I'm glad I don't have to find out, but the thought is amusing enough. "I don't suppose this will take very long, then." She didn't wait for a response before entering her room.
"Morrigan." The mage looked angry, as usual, but there was worry in her eyes.
"Do not be alarmed. It is only I." The Mage's voice was soft, soothing almost.
Ravenna closed the door behind her. "Don't you have your own room? Or is something wrong?" She crossed her arms over her chest. Finding Morrigan in her room tonight was not likely to be a coincidence.
"I am well. Tis you who are in danger. I have a plan, you see. A way out. The loop in your hole. I know what happens when the archdemon dies. I know a Gray Warden must be sacrificed, and that sacrifice could be you. I've come to tell you that this does not need to be."
The placidity and false calm Morrigan injected into her every word set Ravenna on edge. She knew sarcasm was uncalled for, but she couldn't help herself. "What glad tidings." She sighed. "I need to change. Since you're here uninvited, I expect no protests or you can leave." Morrigan looked uncomfortable but offered no complaint as Ravenna removed the horrid borrowed dress.
"You don't know me very well if you think I'm afraid to die, or so attached to life that I need a way out." She pulled on a pair of soft leather pants and a black linen shirt. "But I am curious, how do you know about this?"
"I know a great many things. How I know is not as important as what I am offering you, however. I offer a way out. A way out for all Gray Wardens, so there need not be a sacrifice. A ritual... Performed on the eve of battle, in the dark of night."
"What a storyteller you'd make, Morrigan. Your mother said you had a fanciful imagination. What sort of ritual is this?"
Morrigan's patience was clearly wearing thin, but her soothing tone persisted. "It is old magic. From a time before the circle of magi was created. Some might call it blood magic, but that is but a name. There is far more to fear in this world than names."
"And where did you get this ritual, Morrigan?"
"From Flemeth of course. I have known about it for some time."
"So you knew about the sacrifice before Riordan told me?"
"I did. Would you have believed me if I had been the one to tell you? I have my doubts."
"Of course you do. Perhaps you were right not to tell me, but not because I wouldn't have believed you. Unlike Alistair, I have never idealized the Wardens. I have seen them for what they truly are. They poison their recruits. Most trade one death sentence for another. Duncan played on my parents' fears as they faced certain death to force their consent for my conscription. He let them die so he could have me." Ravenna was lost in memories for a moment. She wished Duncan had survived Ostagar. There were so many questions that would never be answered. She sighed and focused on the apostate mage standing before her. "Tell me about your ritual, Morrigan."
"What I propose is this: Convince Alistair to lay with me. Here, tonight. And from this ritual a child shall be conceived within me. The child will bear the taint, and when the archdemon is slain, its essence will seek the child like a beacon. At this early stage, the child can absorb the essence and not perish. The archdemon is still destroyed, with no Gray Warden dying in the process."
"Why bring this to me? Why not just go to him?" Ravenna quelled the jealousy and anger that threatened to overcome her. Just to watch me suffer. I should have left her in the swamp for the darkspawn.
"I... He will listen to you, but he mistrusts everything I say."
"And now, so do I. We have been friends, Morrigan. I'm sorry you didn't value that enough to trust me. But I suppose your ritual would increase our odds of success. Tell him you know a ritual that will make the sacrifice unnecessary, and your price for performing it is a night in his bed. If he asks why, flatter him. He's sorely starved for praise, wherever it comes from. Don't tell him about the child or the blood magic and I think you can convince him on your own." Ravenna fastened a curved dagger to her belt and put her boots on. "Use this room if you want, and tell him I gave my approval, but it's his decision. I won't force him to be part of this."
"Very well. After this is done, you allow me to walk away... and you do not follow. Ever. The child will be mine to raise as I wish."
"As long as I never hear of you or the child, I will abide by that. I can't promise the same of anyone else." Ravenna donned a cloak and tucked a folded blanket under her arm, then turned her back on the apostate and forced herself to close the door gently.