[I'm Going to be an Optimist About This]
"No," Ross shouted, running forward with a hand outstretched, as if he could physically pull Bucky back up from the edge.
He halted at the very corner of the roof; Steve and Tony weren't far behind him.
All three of them stood at the edge of the roof, staring down at where Bucky's body had hit the water below. Ripples lapped against the wall that held the water; the only indication that Bucky had fallen.
Even as they stared, no body floated to the surface.
"You killed him," Ross said after a long beat. He turned to Steve and Tony, eyes wide and furious. "You actually killed him."
"And before you do anything rash," Tony said, taking a step back. "Consider this: you try and stop us from leaving and I will alert my friends in the government that you made an attempt on Captain Rogers' life after he stopped a dangerous assassin from escaping."
Ross snorted, crossing his arms over his chest. "Where's your proof?"
It was Tony's turn to snort. "C'mon, man, it's me you're talking to here. You really think I don't have some camera somewhere up here?" he paused. "Is that a chance you're really willing to take?"
Ross held Tony's gaze, eyes flickering to Steve, who stared back impassively.
Ross rocked back on his heels, demeanor relaxing back into the man in charge. He slid his hands into the pockets of his grey pants.
"You're mighty calm for just killing your best friend, Rogers."
Steve didn't move; his face was carefully blank and emotionless.
"It was what he wanted," Steve said between stiff lips.
And it had been. Bucky had asked Steve to shoot him. Bucky had actually agreed with Tony, of all people.
Steve shot Tony a sidelong look, but Tony gave nothing away. He had a smirk playing across his lips; the look of someone who had just soundly beaten his opponent.
"Bucky wanted to protect us from you," Steve added, jabbing a finger at Ross' chest. "As far as I'm concerned, you caused this." He let a little anger and hurt bleed into his voice.
Ross shrugged, and just like that, he had seemingly moved past the fact that Steve had shot Bucky, the man he had been chasing for months.
"What's done is done," Ross finally said. He turned on his heel, walking back to his men. He paused, throwing over his shoulder, "You're free to go home, Captain Rogers. You and your men."
Steve felt his surprise ripple across his face; he hadn't actually thought that Ross would let them go. Tony's threat had probably helped with that, but it was still a shock that Ross was just going to let them walk.
"That's it?" Steve couldn't help but demand. "All of this and you're just letting us go."
"Hey, Cap," Sam called from the helicopter. "Don't push it, man."
Steve waved a hand in acknowledgment, keeping his eyes glued to Ross' back.
Ross turned slightly so that he was eyeing Steve more fully.
"That's it, Captain. This started with the Accords, but it ended with Barnes."
With that, Ross continued walking. He and his men exited the landing platform, leaving Steve and the others alone in the fading sun.
With Ross gone, Steve turned back to the edge and dropped to his knees, staring down at the water. He swallowed roughly, glancing up to Tony.
"He's not dead." It wasn't a question. Steve trusted Tony; he had trusted him to the point of shooting his oldest friend in the chest. But that didn't mean he wasn't terrified that he had made a mistake and actually killed Bucky.
Tony shook his head, lowering himself to Steve's level.
"No," he said. "Bucky isn't dead."
Steve let out a shaky breath that he didn't release he had been holding. Trembling, Steve splayed his palms out on the ground next to him, holding himself steady.
Tony gripped Steve's shoulder with a hand, offering him support.
"We need to leave, Steve. Ross might have let us go because he thinks Bucky is dead, but clearly he's a madman and we need to get out while we can."
Steve nodded and together they both stood, standing shoulder to shoulder. Turning, they walked to the chopper that Sam had just fired up.
Sam's face was pale, the only indication of his reaction to the whole thing, but he didn't say anything until both Tony and Steve were safely strapped in.
With careful hands, the chopper rose into the air at Sam's touch.
The whirring of the blades overhead overwhelmed their senses, but that didn't stop Sam from shouting into his headset, "What the hell just happened?"
Bucky was alive. He almost couldn't believe that he was, but the fact remained that he was sopping wet with a sore chest, waiting for Steve and the others to show up.
After hitting the water, Bucky had made sure to stay under long enough that no one would see him. After a few minutes, Bucky had surfaced and swam to the side. He had then pulled himself out and trekked his way through the dark to the warehouse that Sam and Steve had first put him in.
It wasn't where they had agreed to meet, but Bucky was cold and figured that Steve would remember the place and check it before they left the city.
Bucky was sitting in the dark with his back pressed against a brick wall. His legs were splayed out in front of him, black pants soaking and tight.
With his flesh hand, Bucky gently prodded his chest, fingering the round hole in his shirt.
With cold hands, Bucky carefully eased his dark shirt off, letting it drop next to him in a crumbled heap.
A red and gold metal vest hugged his chest, starting at his neck and ending above his hips.
He gently touched a finger to the breastplate, not really sure how it got there.
He had felt it expand across his chest when Tony had demanded Steve shoot him. The thin metal had slithered across his skin as Tony stared at him.
Bucky hadn't been sure what it was at the time, but he knew that he had to take a leap of faith and trust that Tony knew what he was doing.
And he did; Tony had a plan, a plan that worked. Bucky had successfully been shot and was presumed dead by Ross.
"Bucky?" Steve's voice rang out, echoing in the empty space. "Are you here?"
"I'm here," Bucky called out, voice catching slightly in his chest. He pressed a hand to the metal, feeling a bump caught in between the ridges.
He stood up, fingers tugging at the bump until it came loose. Bucky eyed the mangled bullet that lay in his palm. The bullet that had attempted to kill him, but ended up saving his life.
"Bucky."
Steve's arms were around him before he had a chance to even look up.
"You're alive," Steve mumbled, stress coloring his voice. "Tony said—,"
"I'm fine, Steve," Bucky interrupted, pulling back from his friend. "I'm fine."
"Nice digs," Tony said, coming forward. He nodded to the red and gold vest that covered Bucky's chest.
"What are you wearing?" Sam asked from next to Tony.
Bucky shrugged. "Ask Tony."
"It's part of my suit," Tony said as if that was obvious. "I put it on him when I was beating the shit out of him."
Bucky frowned a little. "You beat the shit out of me?"
Sam laughed. "Yeah, right. No way."
Tony half-heartedly glared at Sam. "Yes way, ye of little faith. But that's not the point. The point is that I slipped it under Bucky's shirt while Ross and everyone else was distracted."
"You slipped that whole metal vest on Bucky?" Sam asked incredulously.
Tony waved a hand. "No, of course not. I put a chip on him that later expanded into the vest you see now."
"So you expanded it when you told me to shoot him?" Steve asked from Bucky's side.
Tony nodded.
They all stared at the red and gold that adorned Bucky for a moment, hardly able to believe that they had pulled this off.
Sam strode forward, raising a hand to Bucky, who hesitantly slapped it with his own.
"I'm glad you're alive, man."
"Me too," Bucky said.
"Like you said," Sam continued, "we were just becoming friends. It would've been a shame if you'd dead."
"Whoa," Bucky said, echoing Sam's words from earlier. "Easy there with the f word." A grin stretched across his lips, one that Sam returned.
Bucky then gave Steve a look.
"Try not to look so happy, Steve."
Steve's own face was practically splitting from the grin that was etched on his lips.
"Don't tell me what to feel, Buck. I am happy," Steve said shoving Bucky gently with his shoulder.
"Sorry to break into your happiness," Tony said, slightly awkwardly, "but we need to boogie. Home awaits us, after all."
Bucky blinked, while Sam and Steve exchanged looks.
"Home," Steve said, savoring the word. "We're finally going home."
Home. Bucky wasn't sure what that was; he hadn't had a home since before he fell into Hydra's clutches. Romania had been his home for a time, but he had lived there with the knowledge that it wouldn't last; he would have to leave when someone finally recognized him. But what he hadn't counted on was Steve being the one to actually find him.
Steve had found him and now, months later, they were going home.
Tony wasn't sure how he should act around Bucky. It had only been a week since they had gotten away from Ross and came back home to the U.S.
They had gone back to the Avengers base, most of it unoccupied, giving Bucky the space he needed to keep up the pretense of death.
Tony hadn't wanted to leave them after they had settled in; he had only just gotten his friends back.
So he had stayed.
But now, he was faced with Bucky, and only Bucky.
Bucky, for his part, was ignoring Tony. He was sitting at the kitchen counter, bowl of cereal in front of him. His long hair was pulled back into a messy bun that Sam had insisted on trying, claiming that he had practice with long hair because of his sisters.
Tony was surprised that Bucky hadn't ripped Sam's hands off when he first started tugging at the dark strands. Clearly, Bucky had come a long way.
With his hair out of his face, Bucky sat hunched over his bowl, bare feet tucked into the bars of the stool.
Tony eyed the grey sweat pants that hung loosely on Bucky's hips. A black tank top covered Bucky's chest, leaving his metal arm bare.
An involuntary shiver rippled through Tony at the sight of the glinting metal.
"You can sit down," Bucky's voice made Tony jump. So maybe he wasn't being ignored by the other man after all.
"Uh, I'm okay," Tony said, although he scooted closer to the counter. "Where's Steve and Sam?"
Bucky shrugged. "Not sure."
Tony hummed, fingers gripping the edge of the counter.
Bucky swirled his milk with his spoon, glaring down at the soggy cereal.
"What'd the cereal ever do to you?" Tony asked, almost wishing he could pull the words back as Bucky's glare turned to him.
"It's soggy," Bucky said, as if that was obvious. "I don't like it soggy."
His glare broke after a moment and a smile graced Bucky's features. Relief instantly washed over Tony; he wasn't sure that he would ever not be nervous around the former assassin.
"You were just screwing with me?" Tony asked.
Bucky nodded, still smiling. He pushed the bowl away. "But I really don't like soggy cereal." He made a face at the bowl.
"You gotta eat it faster," Tony said. "That way it won't get soggy."
Bucky sent Tony a look. "Yeah."
Tony could feel the waves of sarcasm coming from the other man; it almost seemed like Bucky's old personality was finally coming through. Obviously, there hadn't been time for Bucky to really show anyone who he really was. And if Tony was being honest, Bucky probably hadn't been ready to let his old self come through until now.
Bucky's gaze dropped and his hands twisted on the surface of the glossy counter.
"Something on your mind?" Tony asked after a moment.
"Yeah," Bucky said. He straightened, catching Tony's eyes. "I need to...I don't think I've actually told you that I'm sorry."
Tony stiffened.
"People keep giving you excuses for what happened to your parents. They tell you that I didn't know what I was doing, that I had been ordered to kill them, that I didn't have control of my mind," Bucky paused. "I'm not saying those things aren't true, but they weren't what you needed to hear."
Tony couldn't look away from Bucky. He stood frozen, listening to Bucky's words.
"What you needed from me is this: I'm sorry, Tony." Bucky leaned forward, pressing his arms to the counter. "I'm sorry that I couldn't break out of Hydra's control sooner. Because I was too weak, because I didn't have Steve, because of whatever reason, I couldn't stop myself from killing Howard and Maria, and for that I'm truly sorry."
Bucky stopped abruptly, leaning away.
After a long beat of silence, he stood up, shoving away from the counter.
Tony was frozen, watching Bucky walk away. It hadn't occurred to him that maybe Bucky had been avoiding him this whole time too.
Tony had accepted that Bucky hadn't been in control of his own mind when he had killed Howard and Maria, but for Bucky to acknowledge that and apologize for it was something that Tony didn't even know he had needed to hear.
His chest loosened and he let out a deep breath.
He had been angry for a long time and he had directed that anger at Bucky, but after seeing exactly how Hydra had been able to control Bucky, Tony knew that he couldn't continue with the blame and the anger.
Bucky never had a chance against Hydra and their damned words.
Which meant that Howard and Maria never had a chance.
"Bucky, wait," Tony called out. He jogged forward, stopping just behind Bucky. "You don't have to leave."
Bucky's back was stiff and he didn't make any move to turn around.
"We could, uh, have some more cereal." Tony winced; it had sounded better in his head.
Bucky snorted, finally turning.
"Cereal?"
"Yeah," Tony said, relieved at the breaking tension. "We could see who eats it the fastest."
Bucky's eyebrow arched. "Was that a challenge?"
Tony crossed his arms over his chest, confidence rising a few notches. "Yeah, it was, metal boy."
"Metal boy?"
Tony waved a hand. "It's the best I got right now."
Bucky shook his head, moving past Tony back to the counter. "Keep working on it. I'm not getting stuck with that for a nick name."
Tony smiled at Bucky's retreating back. He might not know how to act around Bucky, but given some time, it would get easier.
Steve couldn't believe what he was seeing.
Tony and Bucky were hunched over the counter, stools push aside, gulping down bowls of milk and cereal.
Steve watched from the doorway as Tony attempted to cheat by poking Bucky's side with a finger.
Bucky only swiped the hand away, sending Tony a glare as he continued to slurp down the milk in his bowl.
Seconds later, it was over.
Putting the bowl down, Bucky wiped his chin with a hand, still glaring at Tony.
"Fucking cheater."
Tony shrugged, not denying it.
"You still won," Tony said.
Bucky acknowledged it with a nod of his head, a smile playing on his face.
Without even looking towards Steve, Bucky called out, "You gonna stand there all day, Steve?"
Tony jerked a little, looking over Bucky's shoulder to Steve.
Steve pushed off from the doorframe, moving into the kitchen.
Tony cleared his throat, trying to move past the fact that he and Bucky had been having a cereal eating contest, which Steve had just witnessed.
"Where were you?" Tony asked after a beat, leaning his hip against the counter.
"Sam and I were just picking up some friends," Steve said, jerking his chin vaguely behind him.
Tony raised an eyebrow. "Friends?"
"He's means us, loser," Clint Barton's voice rang out.
Clint, Natasha, and Wanda emerged from behind Steve; Sam trailing after them. All of them looked tired, cheeks faintly dirty, but happy to be back.
Tony grinned, only hesitating a second before coming forward.
"Birdman, it's good to see you," Tony said, clasping Clint's hand with his own.
"It's good to be back," Clint said. "It's been too long."
Natasha leaned forward, pushing Clint out of the way, to give Tony a hug. He stiffened under her arms, but a genuine smile broke out on his face as he returned the gesture.
"You look good, Stark," Natasha said.
Tony shrugged under her arms. "Thanks. You too."
When Natasha pulled back, Tony gave Wanda a careful look. She stood slightly behind Clint and Natasha, eyeing him impassively. Keeping her distance, she gave Tony a nod.
Steve inwardly sighed; it would take Wanda some time to forgive Tony for his actions against her and the others.
He didn't blame her; after all it had taken Tony saving their lives for him to forgive Tony.
But it also taken Tony time to move on and forgive Steve too. The blame had gone both ways.
For Wanda it was a little different; Tony had honestly thought that he was doing the right thing by locking her away.
He was wrong, but he hadn't realized that until later.
Forgiveness would come, but right now Wanda wasn't ready for it.
Tony cleared his throat, waving a hand to the counter where the abandoned bowls of cereal still sat.
"You guys hungry?"
"Are you kidding?" Clint demanded. "Hell, yes, I'm hungry. Do you know where we came from?"
Tony shrugged, moving further into the kitchen, pulling move bowls out from the cupboards.
"Just know that we didn't have readily available refrigerators," Clint said, following Tony. "Pain in my ass, man."
Tony pushed a box of cereal and gallon of milk towards Clint, Natasha, and Wanda who gratefully claimed stools at the counter.
The cereal was passed around and soon all that could be heard was the grateful munching of the food.
"So," Tony said, somewhat awkwardly. "Were you all traveling together or...?"
Wanda's head popped up from her bowl and she shot him a dark look; reminding Tony exactly why they had been "traveling."
Clint calmed her with a touch of his hand to her forearm.
She looked at Clint, having an intense staring contest with him, before she sighed and went back to her cereal.
"It was just Wanda and me for a bit," Clint said around a mouthful of milk and crushed flakes. "Nat found us about a month into our trip." He swallowed. "We stuck together after that."
No one dared to point out that it probably hadn't been the smartest for them to travel together. Especially since everyone at SHIELD knew how close Natasha and Clint were and would be looking for them together.
At this point, it didn't matter anymore; they had made it months without being found and now Ross had given them permission to come home.
Steve was going to make sure that they wouldn't have to live in fear of Ross' goodwill changing; he wasn't going to have his team split again.
But for now, it was just good to have everyone back.
"I'm glad you're all back," Steve said, breaking the tension. "This place just wasn't the same without everyone."
"Like I said," Clint said, saluting Steve with his spoon. "Glad to be back, Cap."
As they went back to their food, Steve turned his attention to Bucky, who stood at the edge of the group, arms crossed over his chest as he watched the Avengers' reunion.
Steve crossed the space to stand next to him.
"You okay?" he asked quietly.
Bucky didn't turn to Steve, instead he watched as Clint started up a story in loud, animated tones about how he had fought a bull in Spain and apparently lived to tell the tale.
He snorted at Clint's wild arms and the fond, but exasperated look on both Natasha and Wanda's faces.
"Yeah," he finally said, turning to Steve. "I'm good."
"You'd tell me if you weren't, right?" Steve asked.
Bucky nodded. "Yeah. But don't worry. I'm okay." He paused. "I'm home."
The End
A/N: Aaaaand, that's it. I had trouble with this chapter too, but I'm okay with how it turned out.
Sorry if I caused any pain with the last chapter's cliffhanger! I needed Ross to think that Bucky was dead. Speaking of Ross, I know that a lot of people wanted him to die. I didn't kill him off for a couple of reasons. The biggest was that I didn't want any of the characters do it, because if they did, I think it could have been the start of a dark path for them. Like I said in the last chapter, Bucky decided not to kill Ross because he knew that he couldn't kill someone like that without losing a part of himself. Does that make sense? (Also it was super dramatic to have Steve "shoot" Bucky, instead of Ross just dying).
Okay, so I just want to thank everyone who read this story! It was a very different experience for me to update each week, but with all of your reviews I was able to get chapters done and posted quickly. I hope everyone enjoyed the ride because I sure did.
I'm definitely going to be writing more Marvel stories, but with school starting next week, I won't have time (I'm in a Novel Workshop class, so I won't have time to write fanfic). So I guess I'm saying that I'll be writing more stories, but just not for a bit.
Thanks again, everyone!