Fighting Desire
part 14
Very early the next morning, Leo and Usagi rode away from the orphanage. Usagi had said his farewells to the headmistress the night before so there was nothing to delay them as they packed their belongings and saddled their mounts.
Leo was glad they would not be there when the children woke. He had a feeling that telling Mayu he was leaving would have been difficult for both of them. In a very short amount of time he had formed an attachment for the little girl; she had a beautiful and brave spirit. However, Leo knew that interacting with her further would be like leading her on and he could not allow her to have false hopes of his becoming anything more than a visitor in her life.
The darkness had the advantage of hiding the awkwardness between the two friends. Usagi's revelation from the night before sat heavily between them, especially since Leo could not reciprocate. Conversation was minimal; the need to stay sharply vigilant was excuse enough for that.
As the day wore on and Usagi behaved as usual, the awkwardness Leo felt seemed to fade. Leo was determined to hold onto his friendship with the samurai and to avoid any change in his interactions with Usagi.
They decided to ride as much as possible that first day and were well pleased when this leg of the journey wasn't interrupted by bandits as it had been the last time. Daisuke must have used the opportunity upon passing through with Lord Noriyuki's troops to sweep the area clean. The men who preyed on travelers were too wary to return anytime soon.
The pair discussed that turn of events as they settled into their camp for the night. Letting their horses act as an early warning system, they relaxed together over a meal. Leo knew it would be the last they would share alone, although he hadn't yet told Usagi that he meant to leave after speaking with Lord Noriyuki.
"Do you think the bandits are gone for good from this area?" Leo asked.
Usagi shook his head. "No, I do not. They have no home; men such as themselves are not welcome in villages for very long and must continue to move. The fear will fade with time and they will return."
"Perhaps Lord Noriyuki could form a brigade that is separate from his army," Leo said thoughtfully. "A group with outposts in the towns and villages that lie between the larger cities. They could patrol at random intervals and wipe out the bandits who operate within his jurisdiction."
Usagi sat up straight, his ears perking in interest. "This idea . . . yes, it has a number of advantages. There are many who would like to participate in protecting Lord Noriyuki's domain, but who do not join the regular army because their families cannot afford for them to leave."
"They wouldn't have to be full-time warriors," Leo said, following his own line of thought. "There could be shifts that would allow them the time off needed to attend to family. Recruits could be trained just as you and I trained Hideo and Kai. Everything they needed to do this job would be provided; lodging, horses, weapons, and training. Lord Noriyuki would pay them only for the time when they are actually training or covering their shift."
"There are many families who would flourish from an increase in their income by having a son or daughter in the brigade," Usagi said. "Leonardo-san, you must present this plan to Lord Noriyuki, it is the answer to a great deal of his difficulties in keeping his lands safe."
"With the added advantage of not allowing Hebi another opportunity to insinuate his loyalists into the outlying towns and villages," Leo said. "Without being able to recruit new men, Hebi cannot take over another city. Everyone would be more vigilant."
"Care would have to be taken that the brigade is not infiltrated by any of Hebi's loyalists," Usagi said. "As with any structure of potential power comes the opportunity for men to become tainted."
"Yes." Leo's eyes narrowed. "Lord Noriyuki would need to choose men he trusts in order to begin creating the brigade. There would be a lot of planning involved; maps would need to be drawn to determine locations for the outposts. Until he had a contingent built up of local citizenry, he would have to assign some of his troops to operate the outposts and train new recruits."
Usagi was watching Leo carefully, noting with pleasure the look of excitement and anticipation he could see on his friend's face and in his eyes. This idea belonged to Leonardo and it would be a great temptation for the kame to see it through to fruition. That would take months, possibly more than a year.
Being something of a strategist himself, Usagi was careful not to point that out to Leonardo. Doing so would sound self-serving after Usagi's revelation that he desired for Leo to remain in this world. Usagi was sure that Lord Noriyuki would make the suggestion himself and it would not have to come from the samurai.
Leo took the first watch that night, his mind too filled with his new concept to allow sleep. Usagi tried not the feel complacent about that fact knowing that this new idea alone might not convince Leo to stay with him.
Watching his friend concentrate on a plan and focus on working through all of its variables was mesmerizing. Usagi felt again the surge of longing and desire that came with thinking of Leonardo and once more made a resolution to fight for a chance at happiness with his kame friend by his side forever.
By the time the sun rose the next day, the pair had been in the saddle for several hours. Leo's mind was still partly on the complexity of the plan he was formulating. He would meet with Lord Noriyuki and outline the concept, along with a suggestion that Hideo and Kai be given charge of implementation.
With the aid of Daisuke and Gen, Leo knew that his trainees were more than capable of taking on such a large task. Their loyalty to Lord Noriyuki was above question and both were adept at weeding out bad apples. If Hebi were to even think of placing any of his loyalists within the brigade, Hideo and Kai would know of it.
Having such a force in place throughout Lord Noriyuki's holdings would create a web that bandits, marauders, and invaders would be careful to avoid. Being able to create such a barrier would assuage some of Leo's guilt at leaving Usagi alone once more.
During the ride to the castle, Leo and Usagi discussed various points of Leo's plan, fine tuning it as they traveled. Neither of them spoke of their personal agendas, nor did their conversation or attitude give hints of such a thing. It was as if they both played a lone game of chess without realizing that they did, after all, have an opponent.
As they rode along the back trail that would take them to Lord Noriyuki's stables, Leo said, "I wouldn't mind a hot bath and a soft bed right about now."
"You have read my mind, Leonardo-san," Usagi replied. "I too am longing a room that is not already occupied by thousands of tiny creatures who are all intent upon making a meal of my skin."
Leo laughed. "Camping under the stars was less dangerous than sliding between those supposedly clean sheets at the inn in Noda."
"It is quite possible that the inn keeper could be charged with some crime, though I am not sure how one words such a thing," Usagi joked.
Leo was on the verge of answering when he noticed a plume of dust rising up from the trail. It was some distance from them and moving away rather than nearer.
"Someone else is using the trail this afternoon," Leo said in a low voice, instantly shifting into high alert.
"Yes." Usagi's attitude changed quickly as well. "This is not a highly traveled trail. I do not like how close this unknown rider is to Lord Noriyuki's castle."
Riding slower and with more caution, the pair approached the stables. At first they saw no one, but upon turning a bend in the trail they found their path blocked.
Standing before the stables were several dozen of the soldiers Leo had led into the battle at Chibiko. In front of the large crowd were Gen, Daisuke, Hideo, and Kai, all of them grinning madly.
"It appears they had someone watching for us," Usagi remarked loudly in order to be heard over the crowd.
"For three days now," Gen acknowledged as he stepped back to allow the pair room to dismount.
"How did you fare?" Daisuke asked.
Leo pulled his backpack from the horse and handed the reins over the one of the stablemen. "It was a false trail," he answered. "The wagon belonged to common thieves, and the other riders were separate from them."
"Bah," Gennosuke growled and spat on the ground. "Hebi is a ghost. If we want to put an end to him we need to have a séance."
"I sincerely hope it will not come to that," Usagi said with a smile. "I do not care for spirits."
No one asked where they had spent the last day or two and neither one of the pair offered the information. They took time to greet each soldier who had come to see their arrival, and then at Gen's bidding, they followed him into the castle. Daisuke, Hideo and Kai came along with them, obviously having been asked to do so by Lord Noriyuki.
The young Lord was waiting for them in the large room he used for conducting meetings, Tomoe Ame by his side.
"Usagi! Leonardo!" Lord Noriyuki called out in delight.
The pair bowed to the young Lord and then smiled as he clasped each of them warmly.
"You have made me so happy," Lord Noriyuki told them. "Through your efforts Hebi's blight has been lifted from my land and its people."
"We only wish we could have rid you of Hebi himself," Leo said.
Lord Noriyuki waved a dismissive hand in the air. "He will soon have no resources and that will render him harmless. With nowhere to go and no one to turn to, he will be captured or killed soon enough."
"Leonardo has given much thought to how you may thwart any plans Hebi may have for repeating his last venture," Usagi said.
"Ah, Leonardo-san, you are ever the general," Lord Noriyuki said. "We must discuss this further, but not at the moment. I see that the two of you are in need of some rest and a good long soak. All of you will both join me this evening for dinner and afterwards we will have time to review all of the events that have taken place."
Leo barely contained a sigh. He looked forward to the bath and a nap, but he would rather have skipped another formal meal. In fact, he had thought to take his leave of Usagi's world this evening and return to his home.
"It would be an honor," Leo said, his expression and mannerisms giving away none of his feelings.
Everyone bowed as Lord Noriyuki made his exit and then Usagi touched Leo's arm lightly.
"We will have the same rooms," Usagi said. "I am sure that by now someone has drawn a hot bath in each of them."
No one accompanied the pair as they trudged on tired feet to their bedrooms. Leo opened the door to his and before stepping through, turned to Usagi.
"I may not make it from the bath to the bed," Leo said with a small grin. "I hope someone will let me know when it's time for dinner."
Usagi laughed. "I will see to that. I believe I may be in need of similar assistance. However, it takes longer for me to dry off after bathing, so I cannot enjoy the luxury of lounging in the water."
An image of a nude Usagi rising from his bath, fur glistening with water droplets, came unbidden into Leo's mind and he swallowed. A slight flush painted his neck as he nodded and quickly backed into his room, closing the door softly.
Staring at the door for a long moment, Usagi's brow furrowed as he tried to think what could possibly have gotten his friend so flustered. A slow smile spread across his mouth as he came to what he believed to be the reason. Perhaps his cause was not lost after all.
Leo crossed the bedroom shakily, dropping his backpack on the bed before entering the room that held his already prepared steaming bath. Divesting himself of his gear but keeping his katanas close to hand, Leo stepped into the tub and lowered his slightly aching body into it.
That mental picture of Usagi was the first time Leo had ever thought of his friend in any way remotely resembling sexual. Soaking in the tub, Leo analyzed what had just occurred and determined that he really didn't desire Usagi, it was simply an instinctual response precipitated by Leo's already burgeoning hormonal needs.
He wouldn't have reacted at all if Usagi's proximity hadn't recalled the samurai's confession. Leo had enough of an ego to admit that the revelation had been very flattering to him, even if it was unwanted.
Understanding his reaction gave Leo a sense of inner peace and he relaxed, concentrating on the heat of the water in the same manner as he did the candles during meditation. It wasn't long before he could no longer feel his body and his spirit drifted, looking as it always did, for a path towards enlightenment.
His spirit instead took a route that led Leonardo to his brothers and he lightly touched each of them with his mind, ensuring himself of their well-being. He felt in each of them a certain unease; fear, trepidation, anger, frustration, and need. Leo could feel their thoughts center on him and then jump away, as though they were each fighting an inner demon of their own.
Pulling away from them and sliding back into his own body, Leo realized that the path he'd just taken was that of enlightenment. It led unfailingly to his brothers.
A soft tap on his door jerked Leo up from the bed he'd finally made it into. His hand swept down to his katana before his mind registered his surroundings and told him where he was.
"Yes?" Leo called out.
"I was to call you for dinner, shireikan," a servant responded, his voice suitably deferential.
"I'll find my way," Leo answered.
Quickly strapping on his gear, Leo took a moment to stretch, the delicious feeling of the bath and a long nap on a soft bed lingering in his muscles. Stepping into the corridor, he saw Usagi standing before his own bedroom door.
"Did you sleep well, Leonardo-san?" Usagi asked.
"Exceptionally well," Leo said. "I'm glad there were no assassins stalking these halls, I don't know that I would have awakened."
Smiling slightly, Usagi said, "I will admit to this also. Sleeping upon a soft bed should not be so hazardous."
Walking towards the dining hall together, Leo glanced sideways at Usagi and said, "The servant who woke me called me 'commander."
Usagi nodded. "Yes, they have heard the tale of how you took command of Lord Noriyuki's army and regained control of Chibiko. They were unsure of your place in the young Lord's life and it gives them satisfaction to have a title for you other than ninja. That is a word they do not care to utter, no offense given."
"None taken," Leo said with a grin. This bandying of words between them was at least normal and made him feel more relaxed in Usagi's company.
When they reached the dining hall, Leo's tension returned. The large room was filled with people, many wearing gleaming robes that denoted their stature in society. Leo felt distinctly out of place and even more so when a servant led he and Usagi to seats on either side of Lord Noriyuki's.
Leo soon discovered that the meal was a tribute to Usagi and himself, a way to thank them and to introduce them to some of the leading families in the region. As a ninja and shadow warrior, Leonardo much preferred anonymity, but he understood that Lord Noriyuki was performing a duty that befell one in his position.
Throughout the meal, Leo listened to the conversation around him, noting that much of it was political in nature. Although quite young, Lord Noriyuki was well versed and spoke with knowledge and intelligence to men many years his senior.
Periodically, Leo would catch Usagi's eyes and the looks they exchanged would fill them with mirth. Certain words or antics from the other guests brought almost the exact same thoughts to the pair, and they didn't need to say anything to know what the other was thinking.
Fortunately, Leo was not required to speak in acknowledgment of the tribute that Lord Noriyuki was paying him, and that suited the Turtle. Leo was sure he could have found something appropriate to say if called upon to do so, he was just happy he didn't have to.
The meal lasted for nearly three hours before Lord Noriyuki stood and bade his guest's goodnight. When he was gone, the room began to empty and Tomoe Ame requested that Leo and Usagi join the young Lord.
Following her into a room filled with scrolls and a large table, Leo saw that not only was Lord Noriyuki and some of his advisors present, but so were Gen and Daisuke.
At Lord Noriyuki's bidding, Leo and Usagi made themselves comfortable as cups of rice wine were placed on the table in front of them.
"I have not forgotten that you wished to speak to me of another of your excellent plans, Leonardo-san," Lord Noriyuki said. "It is my wish to share a thought or two of my own with you. Please, tell me what is on your mind."
Leo took a sip of his wine out of politeness and began to outline his idea for a special brigade whose formation would hopefully resolve the issue of the bandits who now roamed freely over Lord Noriyuki's lands.
As he talked, one of Lord Noriyuki's advisors began to swiftly write down Leo's ideas. Sometimes the young Lord would interpose a question, other times the questions came from Gen or Daisuke.
When Leo was finished, Lord Noriyuki sat back and folded his hands together atop the table. After a moment of thought, the young Lord looked over at his advisors, who each in turn nodded.
"This plan of yours, this brigade, it is a very good idea," Lord Noriyuki said. "I will see to its immediate implementation. A great deal of work will need to be done to bring about its formation."
"Finding quality men to fill command positions will be essential to its success," Daisuke said. "I agree with Leonardo's assessment of Hideo and Kai."
"This leads me to the point I wished to discuss with you, Leonardo-san," Lord Noriyuki said. "While we were awaiting your return, Gen and Daisuke spoke frequently about the needs of our military. We had come to the conclusion that the primary force should be split into two equal structures, under the command of two generals. This brigade idea of yours removes the need for us to stretch our resources in such a manner. It still leaves one command position available."
Leaning towards Leo, Lord Noriyuki continued, "I would like to offer this position to you. You may choose to command the regular army, as you did when retaking Chibiko, or you may assume complete control over the brigade. Daisuke has assured me he has no qualms with regards to the army he is to command, I am sure he will have no problem turning the army over to you and leading the brigade."
"Leonardo-san, I have watched you lead and watched you fight," Daisuke said. "You have no equal and I would be most honored if you would choose to share this position of leadership with me."
They were looking expectantly at Leo and he could feel their eyes on him, none more so than Usagi's. A fleeting thought entered Leo's mind that Usagi had known that Lord Noriyuki would make an offer of this kind, especially after hearing Leo's idea on the formation of a brigade. Usagi had played his hand well in saying nothing of this; allowing the offer to come unexpectedly from Lord Noriyuki instead.
Choosing his words carefully, Leo said, "I am truly honored that you would make such a generous offer, Lord Noriyuki. The challenge in either of those positions is extremely tempting. If this were my world, I would most probably accept your offer, but I cannot. I have a much larger commitment to my family and my clan. Leaving them is not something I could ever consider."
The young Lord's expression didn't change, giving the impression that he had expected such an answer from Leo. "Then may I place another offer before you?" he said. "Bring your family here. They will be held in high esteem and may join you as part of my army. Gen and Usagi have told me something of your world; here you will not have to live in the dark underground. Your clan will be given land holdings and a home; servants if you wish for them. You can greet the sun each morning and bask in its rays, and all men will respect you."
To Leo, the words were quite alluring. There would be dangers here just as there were on Earth, but here his family would not only have Lord Noriyuki's support, but that of the Shogun as well. Here Leo and his brothers could make an enormous difference and he might just possibly be able to offer a better life to little Mayu.
As those thoughts ran through his mind, so did the ones that showed him Donatello happily engaged in tinkering with his latest gadget, Raphael revving the engine on his motorcycle while he excitedly told Leo of his latest escapade, and Michelangelo busy stuffing popcorn into his face as he watched a movie or played a video game.
His brothers were fully part of the world they had grown up in and leaving those things behind would be like cutting a piece of themselves off and leaving it behind as well.
Then Leo remembered how his family had fought the Shredder and brought about his final defeat. If not for them, the Shredder might easily have become the one from Donny's nightmare trip into another universe. What the Hamato clan had accomplished had made a difference, a very big one, and hundreds of thousands of lives had been saved. Many of those lives belonged to parents who would now never leave their children orphaned.
"I cannot ask my brothers to make that sacrifice, Lord Noriyuki. I thank you for the opportunity, but my world is the only one my brothers will ever be happy living in," Leo said. "We also have a duty there and cannot abandon it. People just like Hebi walk freely, spreading their evil, and my family has sworn an oath to stop them. Besides that, we have all trained since birth to be ninjas. All of us must hold true to that oath and that includes me."
Lord Noriyuki smiled. "I understand, Leonardo-san. I would not want to leave my world either. You are a ninja of great honor and must follow your duty. I hope that you know you will always be welcome here."
"Thank you, Lord Noriyuki," Leo said as he stood up and bowed. "I would like to bid you farewell; I am leaving tonight for my home."
Usagi's head jerked around, the look of surprise evident on his face.
"We cannot entice you to stay a bit longer and perhaps see to the beginning steps in creating your brigade?" Lord Noriyuki asked, a twinkle in his eye.
Leo smiled in return. "You tempt me greatly, but if I remain I will become immersed in the project and forget my other duties. It would be better if I were to leave immediately."
"As you wish, Leonardo-san. Safe journey to you," Lord Noriyuki said.
Once more Leo bowed and then left the room. Usagi stood up and looked over at Lord Noriyuki, his expression anxious.
"Perhaps I can try again to persuade Leonardo to stay with us," Usagi said.
Lord Noriyuki studied him for a moment and then nodded. "Do what you will, Usagi-san. I do not believe you will be successful, but you have certainly earned the opportunity to try."
With a bow, Usagi turned and swiftly followed Leonardo. Lord Noriyuki watched the samurai leave, noting the stiffness in his shoulders, and then looked back towards Gennosuke.
Gen lifted his cup and gulped down the remainder of his wine, reaching across the table to snag the cups left by Leo and Usagi. A corner of Lord Noriyuki's mouth lifted as he watched his most trusted bodyguard and good friend down first one, then the other. None of them lifted the scowl from Gen's face.
"Something is bothering you, Gennosuke?" Lord Noriyuki asked.
Looking up at the young Lord, Gen snorted loudly. "That is why one must never fall in love," Gen said in a low growl. "There is no profit in it."
"It is possible the heart is not privy to that piece of wisdom," Lord Noriyuki said as he chuckled.
"Ha!" Gen barked. "I taught mine. It doesn't jump around unless there is coin involved."
Lord Noriyuki leaned back in his chair, the satisfied expression on his face belonging to someone much older. "I am wounded, Gen. I was sure your loyalty to me was due to more than my wealth."
Dismayed, Gen's mouth opened to protest before he saw the young Lord laughing at him.
"There is a chance I do have a soft spot," Gen admitted gruffly.
Lord Noriyuki nodded at him fondly. "Do not worry, I will speak of it to no one."
Daisuke hid a smile in his cup. He too cared deeply for Lord Noriyuki and would willingly give his life for the young man. He knew that Usagi would do the same and felt a deep connection to the samurai for that reason.
It worried him that Usagi appeared to have feelings for the kame Leonardo, as Gennosuke had surmised. Daisuke had many opportunities to observe the visitor from another world and of one thing he was certain, Leonardo did not think of Usagi as anything more than a close friend.
A samurai torn by his emotions was a warrior without balance. Daisuke prayed that Usagi could resolve his dilemma quickly before the ronin had to face another battle. Without his focus, Usagi would most likely be unable to walk away from his next fight.
TBC….