Regaining awareness brings the reality that I'm listening in on a rather heated argument. My eyelids seem loathe to open, and I choose for the moment to just listen in.

At least one voice is Xi'An, though not Kree'Gna, "He is an Imperial contractor, your own government agrees!"

I do think I recognize my doctor's voice, "I don't care what any of you say, I'm the attending physician and he is NOT going anywhere until I say so!"

"We will have him moved to our hospital, doctor." That voice is human, but doesn't sound like anyone I'm eager to let have his way.

"You will not!" the Xi'An retorts.

"I say he isn't leaving my jurisdiction until I've had a chance to question him." That voice is vaguely familiar, but I can place her right now.

"You will get another phone call and..."

"No, I won't. The High Advocate's office is involved now and they outrank you before the Imperator." She sure sounds spunky, but any Advocacy agent is likely not a friend.

"We'll see about that."

"He is our contractor and a foreign agent in your eyes. His contract allows us to take custody for his protection."

"What kind of protection do you intend? How do we know you didn't try to kill him in the first place?"

"Us?! Your people are reported to have threatened him with something like this!"

"Who said that?"

"I did," the lady agent responds with enough ice in her tone that I feel the chill myself.

"Prove it."

"With pleasure." I wonder if that is the woman who got pulled from questioning me last night. Whoever she is, there is blatantly no love lost between her and the OES weenie. Anyway, if I've got this about right, the only parties missing right now are MARC and the Tevarin from Gen or the folks he works for.

I finally peel my eyes open and look at the motley assemblage. There are actually two Xi'An present, a diplomat I've never met and Ksan Ko'Kree. The latter notices my waking and says something to the diplomat.

Meanwhile, the Advocacy agent is indeed the one from my questioning last night. She seems to have a fairly high ranking Agent at her shoulder, a person who is looking my way and happens to note that I am stirring.

Next to them and obviously arguing is the OES whomever, with the big guy from last night backing him up... um... Jones, yeah, that's him. He sees my eyes and nods to acknowledge that I recognize him.

There are two UEE Marines guarding the door, looking for all the empire like they are about to repel Vandies.

Finally, there is my doctor, looking more like a lion than he has any right to. I think he sees one of the others notice my waking and turns toward me.

"Mr. Ryan, I'm sorry they have disturbed your rest. How are you feeling?"

They all seem to stop talking to hear my response.

"Pretty bad, I hurt all over. Head especially, but the collarbone and ribs aren't far behind."

"You are mending nicely, but I keep trying to tell these people that two weeks is not enough to recover from your traumas, much less enough to relocate."

"Who said anything about relocating?" It might behoove me to support his case, "I'm in your care, doctor. You tell me when I'm ready for the next steps."

"We are here for your protection," the Xi'An diplomat insists, though without any introduction or courtesy.

"You will heal better under our care," OES talking head informs me.

"I side with is doctor, he isn't going anywhere," Agent whomever states.

I decide to make this a consensus, "What about the Marines? I'd like to know what they would like to do with the situation."

I get glares from everyone except Ksan Ko'Kree... he seems to be thinking something through. He whispers into the diplomat's ear again.

The Xi'An diplomat recovers his calm and looks my way. "I am Torsi Leelk, Diplomat to the UEE. You are Shawn Ryan, Imperial contractor assigned to Kree'Gna. Do you wish to recover here if you are protected from further attempts at your life? We are willing to transport you at any time to the Embassy to secure your convalescence."

"As long as my doctor believes I am best served here, I would rather remain here, Sir."

"He has no say in this, we are going to move him." OES weenie doesn't give up.

"The High Advocate's office supports keeping him here," the higher ranking Agent finally speaks.

I smile, "Then it's settled, yes? Anyone for a nice game of cards?"

"So," I ask the doctor, "Did I understand you correctly, the explosion was two weeks ago?"

He looks my way and smiles thinly, "Yes, you were brought here two weeks ago last night."

"I feel like I've missed things."

"You have," Agent Ellison states, "For one, we've found out that the explosion was most likely a missile or smart bomb. You wouldn't happen to know who would like to kill you, now would you?"

"Aside from people who might be in this room?"

Everyone is looking around except the agent... who might have a guilty look flash across her face for just an instant before control descends. "Meaning whom?" Ellison asks quietly.

"Well, I can't divulge all the possible players, though I might have to cite OEGC 2741-171 Section 4 for at least one party."

The OES bungler and Jones both look stricken, but they recover quickly.

"There might also be members of a certain caste who think I'm not for real and who might have threatened me as well." Diplomat Leelk looks as troubled as I've seen a Xi'An look recently, but Ksan Ko'Kree just stares expressionlessly.

"There may also be the person who hired Vixen, Hornek Tish."

She again looks like she thinks I'm seeing something in her, "You've mentioned him before," she snaps, then suddenly says in a calmer tone, "Yes, that might be a good possibility."

I wonder what is going on there? What could possibly provoke such an intense, almost gut level response?

Anyway, I continue, "I suppose there are any number of folks I've shot at or brought in for bounty over the years who might have a grudge, presuming they are still alive and have the means."

"Anyone come to mind?"

"No, not particularly... I've been out there hunting off and on for something like thirty-five years now." I try to think of any other suspects, "Oh, though I've been assured they don't really do things like that, it could have been MARC."

OES guy rolls his eyes like I just suggested fairies or elves. Agent Ellison seems unfazed, as does her companion. Torsi Leelk glances Ksan Ko'Kree's way and the latter just does the Xi'An equivalent of a shrug in apparent response.

My doctor does seem to have taken the conversation to heart, "Are you endangering this hospital or the staff here?"

"I sure hope not, Doc."

"That's not all that comforting."

"Whomever would have to be raving to go after a slice of the hospital, considering the response such wanton murder would usually bring. I think they might try to do a one-on-one but assuming the Marines there can't be bribed, I think whoever will just wait until I leave."

He nods and looks again at those assembled, "I think this is enough fun for my patient for today. I want him to rest and complete his recovery."

There is grumbling, but everyone files out. Well, except for a young nurse's aid who slips in and quietly asks the doctor something. He looks my way and then nods to her.

"Your niece wants to visit."

"Niece?"

From the doorway a stunning thirty-something says, "Lanai, Gloria's kid."

"My, how you have grown," I tell her, trying to keep from lying while letting the doctor know it's okay for him to leave.

"I wasn't sure you would recognize me on looks alone."

"Gloria said you were beautiful, but she obviously has no clue how far above that term you actually appear."

I think she is blushing, "Why thank you, kind sir."

She flashes a smile and I know I would be in serious trouble if I weren't mostly immobilized. Next to her, Xin is a rather plain woman. Her skin is warmly tanned, her figure is perfectly proportioned, and her long dark hair swishes about her waist in the most incredible fashion. But above all, her face seems that of a woman and a child at the same time; exquisitely shaped eyes, nose, and mouth... not quite Asian, but not Caucasian either.

"Where are you from?" I ask, mesmerized.

"A small archipelago in Earth's Pacific Ocean called Hawaii." She smiles in the most fetching manner and says, "Gloria said you would find me interesting."

"Gloria lied. Interesting is not a word that springs readily on your arrival. 'Marry me' is the term that comes foremost to mind."

She laughs, a mirthful sound like the playful tumbling of magical waters over smooth stones. "Well, Uncle TOG, we need to keep up appearances, don't we?"

I sigh. "Yeah, I guess so. If only I were thirty years younger and filthy rich."

"Oh, you never know," she teases, "Twenty younger and financially secure would be fine."

"I was born at the wrong time."

"Actually, I bet you were born at the right time and who knows what a Flunkie will do for her charge?"

"Yeah, well, I'm not sure I'd want that." I think for a minute then honestly admit, "What am I saying? Any excuse is just fine."

She laughs again and the room brightens markedly.

…..

The room is quiet; it has been so since visiting hours ended and everyone left. I think I was dozing and something has unsettled my nap.

Eyes open and I realize that there is a man standing silently at the foot of the bed... or whatever this contraption I'm secured to is called. He is watching me from under a broad hood that shades his eyes.

I wonder if I can raise an alarm in time to save myself... surely this is an assassin. But he seems odd for a killer, there is almost an aura of relaxed peace about the man; if this is a killer, I'm sure my time is up.

In a quiet baritone he speaks, "I am sorry I have disturbed you, Shawn Ryan."

"No problem, um..."

"Brother Colum. I lead the community that Brother Patrick was part of."

"Oh," I wonder if there is something proper to say, but have to resort to, "Well, I'm really sorry about his death and all. I don't know..."

"Peace, sir," he interrupts, but with respect and dignity. "Brother Patrick enjoyed tending the sick and injured. We had a report that Arron was injured and his wife Camilla kidnapped; Brother Patrick insisted on going to tend to Arron and give comfort."

"So I'm the cause of..."

"Hesh, hesh, hesh. I'm not here to lay blame and you should not be trying to take it. I came to see how you are doing. Brother Patrick had said several times that your were a remarkable person and I thought I might come by again and check on your recovery."

Again? "You've been before?"

"Thrice, sir," he states with an easy smile.

"I'm... um... well... thanks."

He laughs and I feel a bit more relaxed myself. "You needn't thank me, but I accept your appreciation. I have been wondering, would you like us to hold off on the wake for Camilla and Arron until you are able to attend?"

"Wake?"

He seems to think about my question. "It is an old traditional way to celebrate a life, or in this case, two lives. In most cases, it is held in a home, but since your home is rather unfit for anything right now, the flock they were part of has asked if we would host it in our meeting hall. We have agreed, but asked that it wait until we can see if you wish to attend."

"Um, sure. Do I have to do anything?"

He laughs again, "Other that be there if you want to come? No. Though I would advise that you wear earplugs if you don't want the music to infect you with uncontrolled desires to dance around and be joyful."

"That sounds like fun."

"It should be indeed."

"I'll come if you wait until I'm released."

"I will make sure it is so. Is there anything I can do for you now, Shawn Ryan?"

"No, that is more than enough, sir... um... Brother... what was it again?"

Smiling, he replies, "Colum. m. Colum."

"I'll try to remember that, Colum."

"Fair enough, Shawn, fair enough." As his words fade, he turns and walks out the door into the hall beyond. I hear him greet one of the nurses by name as he continues down the hall. Even his footsteps now are fading.

…..

Morning has come and with it a new pain: Doctor Harrington has unstrapped me from the restraints and my mending bones are getting their first real stresses.

I am in the physical eval and therapy room, grunting and sweating along with all the other invalids. Doc Harrington approaches with a rather attractive young woman, a nurse I guess, tagging along.

Why is it that now that I'm too old to be of interest there seem to be so many cuties around? When I was their age, all I ever saw were jaded waitresses and the occasional amazon who looked more masculine than the guy in the mirror. Maybe I should have gotten shot up more... on the other hand, maybe not.

Doc starts, "Shawn, this is Erica Vas. She's been assigned to work with you on your physical therapy program." There is an odd look in his eyes and a hint of disapproval in his expression, but I have no hints about what, unless it has to do with Erica.

"Ms. Vas," I say looking again at her. She has that penetrating eye contact that reminds me of Xin, a stare that seems to be assessing rather than friendly.

"I rather you call me Erica, Shawn."

The doctor has retreated a step or two, but I see him grimace from behind her back before turning away.

"Oh, Doc?" I call out. He turns back and smiles wanly. "What is the prognosis for release and such? I told Brother Colum that I would do the wake thing."

"You met Colum? Jix!" He returns now with a genuine smile. "I'll have to review your progress today and maybe tomorrow before I have an idea how those bones are holding, but maybe this week or more likely next. I'll drop by tonight to see how you did and give you a preliminary opinion."

"Excellent."

He turns and walks away again.

"So, Ms. Vas, you got the short straw?"

"Erica. And I don't know what you mean, Shawn."

"Let's stick with Ryan, or Mister Ryan. I don't really like people who presume familiarity before I have reason to agree to it. I'll call you Erica if you insist, but I'm less likely to cooperate with whatever torture you have scheduled for me if you insist on calling me Shawn."

"Would TOG suit you better?"

"TOG is fine."

"Then I will compromise that far, TOG."

"I am curious, where did you hear TOG used?"

In a voice carefully modulated not to carry beyond us, she answers calmly, "Mr. Po, Major McMurdoe, and Xin Po briefed me about you. We have decided that it is fine that you remain here, but we do not want you so openly available to the... public."

"Meaning anyone who might ask questions." I smile, "Nothing like a real assassin managing physical therapy, what better way to kill me than with an accidental heart attack or hemorrhage?"

"If I were here to kill you, you would already be dead TOG."

"That's reassuring."

"It should be. If it matters, we didn't kill your friends. They were our leverage over you, so what would have been the point?"

"I'm not a spy, I have no idea what makes sense to you types."

She studies me again. "You don't trust me, do you?"

"Not a chance."

"Good. Trust no one."

…..

The cruel taskmaster this afternoon is still the evil natured Ms. Vas and I rather unhappily remain within her domain... the rehab room with its imitation of a large, well equipped, sparkling gym.

"Alright, TOG, get your ass in gear!"

"I thought I already did that," I try to retort, though without enough emphasis.

"Going from reverse to parked doesn't count."

For a moment, I ponder rebelling, but only for a moment.

"Very funny," I say before starting the sit-ups I've been avoiding.

"Yeah, pudge-boy, laugh all you want, you get an extra five if you keep it up."

No, no, no, no, no... don't make her mad.

"One," she states.

No. Not even gonna make her mad.

"Two."

I am so out of shape.

"Three," she counts with something like annoyance.

My stomach already hurts.

"Four."

This could take all day.

"Five. My ten year old sister could do this faster."

Great, have her do them then.

"Six."

This is supposed to be helping my bones how again?

"Who said you could slow down? Okay, seven."

I'm getting lightheaded... well, I wish I had such an excuse.

"Eight."

My poor tummy has been doused in fire.

"Nine. Or was that eight?" she teases with a twisted grin.

NO! Please, oh please...

"Ten. About time. Okay, push-ups."

"You have got to be kidding me."

"Not a chance, you old geezer. When I'm done with you you'll last more than six minutes."

"What are you..." I'm suddenly sure I'm blushing, "Oh..."

It takes a few moments, but I mentally start questioning: what was it Gloria said about the OES report? Something about being 'easy to manipulate with sex'... I wonder if Erica here intends to seduce me or otherwise use her body as a tool.

On the other hand, she has a nice figure and is probably Dora's age... sex with her could be a lot of fun if I can forget that she would be doing it because it is part of her job. I guess in a way, I would be paying for her with control... control over me. That idea troubles me and she looks less appealing as I assume the position for the required push-ups.

…..

Lanai is sitting in a chair facing the doorway when I arrive back at the room. Erica, has of course decided that she will escort me everywhere, obviously listening in whenever I speak with anyone.

Seeing Lanai, Erica announces, "This is a private room. Please leave."

Lanai gets an obvious kick out of being so rudely ordered about, her smile widening to heartbreaking proportions as she rises. "Oh, I'm sorry, Miss... I didn't catch your name."

"My name is irrelevant, please leave us."

I consider speaking up, but I think Lanai is about to take her own corrective action and I honestly want to see how this plays out.

Lanai strides directly at us, and out of the corner of my eye I can see Erica shift her weight as if to defend herself. Lanai, however leans towards me, kisses my cheek, and plainly asks, "How have you been today, Uncle Shawn? You seem to have picked up an admirer... did you notice?"

"Hello Lanai. Erica is my..."

"I am in charge of his physical therapy, that is all you need know. Now you may leave, I have things to discuss with TOG."

"Of course I may leave, but I shan't."

Erica is turning a shade of red normally reserved for volcanoes and disrespected Caucasian males. "Do not try my patience."

"So far you haven't shown any, towards me or apparently my uncle. Can't try something that isn't there." Lanai delivers her words calmly but with obvious intent to jab at Erica's temper.

Maybe this is a good time to settle things down a bit, "Ladies, can't we..."

"Shut it, TOG!" Erica orders, obviously not used to being played with. To Lanai, she continues, "You have no idea who you are messing with, bitch."

"On the contrary, you are an OES Associate and a seriously inexperienced one at that."

Erica may have expected just about anything... but obviously NOT that. "How... who are you?"

"I am Lanai, dear Uncle Shawn's favorite."

I nod, she is indeed my favorite, though she isn't my niece.

Something in Erica snaps and she makes to slap Lanai.

I would swear I've seen this play out before in some Kung Fu holo or vid, Erica trying to strike Lanai and Lanai expertly blocking, parrying, or dodging everything. It is actually very entertaining, though I suspect Lanai is getting close to fed up with Erica's aggression.

Finally, Doc Harrington comes in the door and rebukes the both of them, "Ladies! Stop that! This is a hospital!" To Erica he adds, "I was told you would behave as a professional. If you can't, I will insist you are replaced by someone who can."

She looks at him with ill hidden venom, but says nothing in response. To me, however, she says, "TOG, we are leaving."

"No, I want to visit with the Doctor and Lanai. Besides, this is my room. You may leave now, however."

"You..." She is seething, but while she stares daggers at me, she seems to decide that right now isn't the proper time to try to press the matter. She slumps into a chair near at hand and just glares at the three of us.

"I would like you to see some of the results from today, Mr. Ryan," the doc says.

"Sure."

"Come with me."

Lanai sits down, obviously to wait, but Erica rises.

"You will wait here," Harrington instructs the Associate. I see her look about the room, probably back at the now busy Lanai. I believe she is beginning to see that I'm not quite the pushover she expected.

...

We walk into what I presume is Doc Harrington's office and I immediately notice that he has a wall sized glas that is tuned to a camera somewhere in my room.

"You keeping an eye on me too?"

"I had a nurse warn me that things were likely to get out of hand if the two women got together. Frankly, I'm rather disappointed."

"Yeah, they did let themsel..."

"No," he interrupts, "In you. You looked like you were enjoying that cat fight instead of doing something to end it."

"I tried..."

"If that little verbal thing is what you call trying, then we need to check to make sure that you weren't castrated in the blast."

"Excuse me?"

"You have two territorial females who at least appear capable of maiming or killing that you let get to the point they are trading an escalating series of blows; from what I can gather it was over you. Now you want me to believe you couldn't do anything to stop it? This is a hospital, we have people come in here for help, not martial arts battles."

"Look, this wasn't my idea."

"No, and standing up for you to keep the lot of government and Xeno hotheads from ripping you to pieces wasn't my job, was it?"

"You're making me a bad guy here?!"

"You obviously wanted the other girl to take Erica on, your body language and expressions encouraged her. I take it, by the way, she is another spy type of some sort and not your niece."

"Her name is Lanai and she is a MARC Flunkie."

He shakes his head in disgust, "You might give her some credit; in spite of her beauty, I don't think that woman is likely to have flunked anything in her life."

"Oh, yeah, I completely agree. Flunkie is a title they actually seem proud of; believe me, I have no clue why."

"Who is Mark?"

"MARC is the group that got me into this whole mess in the very beginning. MARC is the organization the OES types don't believe even exists."

"Oh, I do remember something that they acted incredulous about. Well, at least Erica asked permission to keep an eye on you."

"MARC never asks, they just show up or hack your networks or something like that."

He gestures towards the glas as he asks, "So they could have this whole thing?"

"Actually, I would expect they do if they think it worth while for their data stores or whatever it was they called them."

"Well, I really wish she had shown me the courtesy of at least letting me know."

I decide it might be time to change the subject, "So, how am I doing, Doc?"

"Well, except for the skull fracture, you seem to check out okay. While Ms. Vas doesn't seem to know the appropriate PT routines to stress test each area individually, she seems to have given all but the skull itself a good workout over the course of the day."

"So, how would I find out about my head?"

"Let me ask you: are you ready to face that feeding frenzy again?"

"Good point. If I'm not, where are we?"

"I would like another day of observation and probably a second to have a chance to run several imaging tests."

"And if I am?"

"You are cleared to go, just be careful about rapid gravity or pressure changes. No zero G for another week unless you get cleared."

"What could happen?"

"Worst case? You get the last headache you will ever need, it will make you cry in agony, and then you will die."

"Um... yeah, let's go with the first option, I need to make sure I'm okay before I go back to work, since work IS in space."

"Makes sense to... oh, no." The doctor looks very tired and a glance at the glas tells me why: a Xi'An has arrived at the doorway to my room... and it is Dnong Ksack.

…..

If walking to my room to try to head off any fireworks wasn't bad enough, Agent Ellison catches up with us as the Doc and I hurry there.

"I need some time to ask questions."

"Doc?"

"I don't see why not," Doc Harrington responds, "Though we probably need to get to your room first."

"Why," Ellison sounds puzzled and annoyed, "What is so important in his room?"

Over my shoulder I toss, "The start of the next Xi'An war?"

"Oh..." she replies, her voice trailing off.

I turn the corner into my doorway and almost walk square into Dnong Ksack's back. He turns quickly, his movements fluid and powerful in keeping with the long Xi'An tradition of martial arts training. But upon facing me, he relaxes his stance and returns to being the ornery looking dinosaur I've always known him to be.

"Shawn Ryan. You have female company; are you healed enough for breeding?"

The two women seem about to explode, but I manage to quickly answer, "No, they are here as minders, making sure that I don't upset their agencies' controlling interests." I turn to those in the room and introduce them.

"This is Doctor Harrington, the physician who is tending to my recovery. Doctor, Dnong of the Seer's caste." The two do slight informal bows.

"Next, this is Lanai, a representative of MARC who is keeping tabs on me." At the Mention of 'MARC', both Dnong and Erica turn to stare. Lanai rises from her chair and as the doctor already has, she exchanges slight bows with Dnong. I would swear that he is genuinely interested in her, though precisely why is not apparent.

Lanai asks quietly, "Will you not share your astranym?"

"No," he says clearly in very good English.

"Next, we have Erica Vas, the OES Associate with the unenviable task of trying to shut me up."

She does indeed look rather put out over what I've just told the Xi'An, but I continue the introduction, "Erica, this is Dnong."

She nods, but doesn't rise.

Behind me, Agent Ellison clears her throat.

"Oh and last but obviously not least, this is Agent Ellison of the Imperial Advocate's Office. Agent Ellison, Dnong."

"All the suspects together," Lanai says with something of a smirk. "No assassinations tonight, folks."

Erica takes offense first, "It wasn't us. If we wanted to kill him, we would have done it."

"There were three people in the building that got bombed, an IR sourcing would have shown such, as would an IR guidance system," Lanai states, "Only in this case a guy from off the grid was the third... How can we be sure you didn't plan to get Mr. Ryan AND Camilla and only Shawn laying a tool case on its side saved him from the hit?

Erica glares at her.

"What about you?" Ellison asks Lanai while Erica continues to fume. "You sure seem to have thought this out.

"Indeed, why couldn't I be working for Hornek Tish? Is it maybe because someone else has been communicating regularly with him and he would be unlikely to want a second contact about so sensitive a subject?"

Ellison seems frozen in place, she could have just died for all the movement that's visible.

Dnong is smiling, as bizarre as that seems, "And me?"

"You are the one on the Xi'An side who has been playing against Shawn since you both first met in Hadur. You originally could have cared less that information about MARC might have been gleaned from watching our interests, I would suggest that you meant for him to die or be arrested on Rihlah."

"Very good, but very obvious."

"Of course, but that is all I need say now, don't you think?"

"So, do I get to live for another night?" I ask. My question is supposed to be rhetorical, but as the four of them look sharply my way, I do have to wonder.

I feel so tired; I take a bedside chair and sag into it. They can resume their sparring if they wish, I've worked hard today and would like a rest.

At this stage of the game, I don't know what or who to expect, so I'm not disappointed that the last person I would have listed as likely to show up actually picks this moment to do so: Kree'Gna.

He looks about the room and bows slightly to Dnong before he turns my way and with a warm smile offers, "Shawn Ryan, Shē'sueren."

"Kree'Gna, Shē'sueren."

Maybe if I follow the best behavior I can change the atmosphere in here; I rise, motion towards my chair and offer it to him, "I would be honored if you would take my place."

He seems to know I'm searching for a change of tone and replies, "I am honored but wish to stand for now. Please, keep your seat my friend."

"Thank you. How have you been?" I ask, noting that for the moment, everyone else is paying attention to our little exchange.

"Chash'anori. I miss my wing, but my duties have been pretty normal. And you?"

"Chash'ambosari. Well, maybe not quite: someone blew up my home and killed several friends..."

My voice cracks unexpectedly, my mind falters, and I can't get any more words out.

All of a sudden it hits me: Camilla and Arron and the strange but likable Brother Patrick... they are gone... forever. I can sense tears in my eyes... one escapes my right eye to start a moist trail down my cheek. Now there is a big one from my left eye, running along the edge of my nose and onto my lip to perch awaiting an excuse to fall further.

Only Doc Harrington and Kree'Gna seem moved by my emotion... well, maybe Lanai as well, but I'm not really looking her way, so it is just an impression. With the ferocity of a cloudburst, I suddenly have salty rivers and waterfalls tumbling down my face...

The Doc speaks, "We need to all give Mr. Ryan some space. Everyone out."

"Kree'Gna can stay," I try to say, but I think it comes out more as a sob.

The three girls do file out; I'm not at all sure what they think about my obvious weakness, but right now, I don't really care. Dnong Ksack glares at the doctor, but turns and retreats into the hallway, though he remains at the doorway. Last but not least, Harrington heads out himself, leaving only Kree'Gna and myself.

"You are struggling with your loss, Shawn Ryan?"

"Yeah," is all I can get out between sobs.

"I have never seen you so. They were nest-mates? No, the term I mean is..." he is thinking. "Family? They were family?"

"Not by blood, but by friendship."

"May their memory be honored."

"But why did they have to die? It's not fair." I hear my words as if some seven year old were saying them, but the raw emotions they represent seem to be those of a little boy hiding in this old guy's body.

"You have lost many friends in combat, is this not the same, Shawn Ryan?"

"No, Kree'Gna, very different. They never asked for this. They were down to earth people, farmers at heart. It's my fault they died, if I have gotten killed in space, they would never have been hurt."

"You blame yourself because a murder that was meant for you hit someone else? Is that either fair or logical?"

I shake my head, but also blurt out, "Wasn't there a time or two in your youth that I remember you being upset over unfair death?"

"Yes, you remember well. I have grown wiser, but perhaps less understanding. Please forgive my insensitivity, Shawn Ryan."

"Nothing to forgive, Kree'Gna. I guess I've never really grieved before, I don't know how to do it right."

"Should I come back after you have had some time?"

"I will be released some time in the next couple days, I'm not sure what the fantastic four out there have planned for me, or what's left of me after they tear me apart."

"I could still use a wing, my friend."

The torrents dry as quickly as they started, leaving their wet riverbeds as the cooling reminder that they existed.

"And I could probably use the chance to get back up there," I answer, "But I need to deal with what happened first. I've gotta make sure the plantation and the people who work for us... uh... me... who work for me are being taken care of."

"I understand, Shawn Ryan. Whenever you are ready, let me know."

In the mental lull from the grief storm, I decide to inquire, "May I ask you something?"

"Please do."

"Did you have anything to do with Ksan Ko'Kree arranging to have me kidnapped from that station before the trip to Rihlah? I don't believe that he rescued me... he had to have already been in that room, I never heard the door open."

Kree'Gna looks down at his hands; if he were a human, I would consider that a guilty look... but I'm not at all sure I'm reading that right.

Finally, he says, "We only follow orders. Please forgive if those orders contributed in any way."

I nod, "Yeah. I guess that's the best we can do some times."

He looks back up to meet my gaze, "You are a good human. I am sorry that I brought you these griefs."

"Yeah, well, I'm the one who accepted the risks."

"Do not be too hard on yourself, Shawn Ryan. Save a little anger for those who deserve it."