A/N - epic. Important bits are underlined.
Ok, the universe is officially conspiring against me. Just as I started to get back into writing, I tripped over my laptop cord, breaking it and putting my knee through my couch and breaking that too. I also ended up in bed for 2 days with a back injury. Dammit! Arg.
Anyway, I bought a new laptop cord today and the first thing I am doing is posting a new chapter! Hurrah! Unfortunately, I haven't been able to write anything in the last two weeks. That'll teach me to back up to USB! I need to read over the last chapter I have written (Chptr 15) and pick it up from where I left off.
Oh well... here we go. Please remember, this has not been beta'd.
Remember where we left off last? Jacob wants to see Bella smile. Bella still screams and cries when no-one is watching. Everyone hates Edward.
Read on.
13. I got you
Bella Swan is giddy
Jacob Black: Why so excited, Bells?
Bella Swan: You know exactly why, JB.
Jacob Black: Yeah, but I want to hear you say it.
Bella Swan: Nothing to tell. Changed my mind.
Bella Swan is nonplussed, nonchalant and NOT GIDDY
Jacob Black: Ouch, that hurts Bells. Right to the heart.
Bella Swan: Right to the EGO, more like.
Jacob Black: Why do you have to bring the hate? Just admit it.
Bella Swan begrudgingly admits that she does, indeed, bring the hate.
Jacob Black: Smart ass.
Being friends with Jacob Black is one of the easiest things I have ever done in my life. Easier than breathing. He brought me back from one of the darkest places I have ever been and showed me how to live again. He made me laugh again.
The first time he saw me smile after our talks at the beach was one afternoon I had gone to meet him down at La Push. We were in his garage, just hanging out whilst he tinkered on his latest project. We were playing Shoot, Shag or Marry and enjoying giving each other the most awful combinations of people possible. When he struggled to decide whether to shoot Heidi Montag, Tara Reid or Lindsay Lohan, I started laughing so hard I was snorting.
"No, I refuse. There is no way I would ever go near any of them. I keep my goods herpes free, thank you very much." He was literally squirming at the thought, his facial expression one of horror.
"Come on, Jakey-poo. You know the rules – no opt outs. You made me choose between Rod Stewart, Steve Tyler and that old dude that dresses like a pirate. As if I would ever go anywhere near any of them! Gross old wrinkly guys really isn't my style" I pulled a face, sticking out my tongue.
"Bells, did you seriously just call me Jakey-poo?" He stood up, stalking away from the bike and in my direction. I could tell by the look on his face that he was trying not to laugh, but with his impressive stature it was still quite daunting. I decided the only way to fight fire was with some sparks of my own.
"Yep" I said, popping my 'p'. "What are you going to do about it?"
He paused for a moment, grinning, before loping quickly over to me and pinning me to the ground. "This."
His hand quickly went to my sides and he was tickling me for all he was worth. I laughed so loud, snorting embarrassingly, for a long time after he stopped. When I realised he was sitting back on his ankles, just watching me, I stopped and raised my eyebrows in question. He smiled and said, simply "You asked me once why I wanted to be friends with you. That, right there, has just become one of my favourite memories."
He didn't say it, because he never said anything that referred to my previously broken state, but he didn't need to say it either. He was glowing.
Because he had made me smile again. Just as he had promised.
I knew that I was flirting with disaster. Jacob had promised to just be my friend, but everything he did showed how much he really cared for me. But his presence in my life had become so crucial to my happiness that I quashed any guilt I had as quickly as it arose. He knew what he was getting into, he had admitted as much on the beach that second/first day. Jacob Black was a grown man, capable of making his own decisions, and he chose to spend his time with me. Yay for me.
I was careful to find a balance in my life, between the old friends and the new. Most afternoons I went to the Cullen's cabin and jammed with Alice. She really is a little freak on the drums. Emmett and Rosalie sometimes joined me when I hung out with Jake in his garage. Rose enjoyed playing around with cars as much as the guys did and she bonded with Jake over it very quickly. He was trying to convince her to give NASCAR a go, arguing that a girl like her would blow all of the chauvinists out of the water. I think she was considering it.
School, however, is difficult.
Edward has taken to staring at me, every chance he gets. I don't know what his problem is, but it is driving me insane. He is sitting over the other side of the cafeteria, surrounded by blond cheerleading whores, burning holes in my psyche over and over. The others have noticed him doing it, but still respect my need to him not to be mentioned. Occasionally one of them would glare back at him, silently telling him to stop. He paid them no heed.
I was really excited today, because Jacob had finished fixing up a motorbike for me. After lots of pleading and reassurances (and promises to cook whatever he wants for dinner for a month), Charlie had finally given in and allowed Jake to give it to me. I had provided him with a thoroughly researched paper on the safety of riding a bike and promised to wear all of the protective gear he wanted. I ended up with a pair of leather gloves and riding pants, a bomber style, wind resistant jacket and a hard as hell helmet to ease his worries. Jacob was picking me up from school today, on my bike, because I couldn't wait until I got to La Push. I would be changing into my gear after gym.
"What's with the grin, Grommett?"
"Like you don't know, butt-munch"
The biggest smile I was currently capable of had been plastered all over my face from the moment I had woken up and remembered what day it was. It was BIKE DAY!!! Seriously, I was giddy. There would be no hiding it from Jake when he got here.
"I know, little girl. I still don't like it, though." Emmett was just as worried about Charlie when it came to the thought of me riding a bike. They had both seen me riding around with Jacob on his a million times, as well as on my own on the res. They knew I could handle it. They were just being over protective. It's cool, 'cause I know it is because they love me. Thank fuck they liked and trusted Jake, because I never would have been able to get away with it were it not for his awesome skills of persuasion.
Skills I had been trying to emulate myself. "Emm, the thing is… I am not a little girl anymore. I am seventeen and will be off to face the big wide world before you know it. Don't you want to know that you are sending me off with the skills to handle myself?" I brought out the puppy dog eyes, before changing quickly back to a wicked grin. "I know I, for one, cannot wait to show off my mad skills this afternoon! I swear, I am giddy."
Emmett laughed, "Ok giddy girl. Just remember, Charlie is bringing the bike up on the truck, so Jake can ride beside you on his. You only have a permit, so don't do anything stupid like going above the limits or popping a wheelie. I am sure Dad is going to be following behind you every step back to the house." He wrapped his arms around me, pulling my back to his chest.
"I love you, Emm. Seriously, I don't think anyone in the world has a better big brother than I do." He squeezed me a little harder before letting go. "Love you too, Grommett."
I started bouncing up and down on the balls of my feet, unable to keep still with all of the adreneline pumping through my veins.
Bella Swan is a hyperactive ball of excitement
Rose and Alice joined us at the drive of the parking lot. Rose was almost as excited as I was – she had tried to help Jake with the bike, but he insisted on doing it all himself. He was so proud of the way the promise of the bike had made me perk up, that there was no way he was letting anyone in on the project. He wouldn't even let Charlie or I pitch in any cash for the renovations.
Just before I was able to let any guilt bubble up to the surface, Charlie's truck and Jake's bike came into view. I started jumping up and down for real this time, grabbing onto Rose's hand as I did. "Ok, you've got to calm down Bells. Remember, Charlie is letting you ride the bike because you are a responsible young adult that can handle the responsibility. If you bound over there like an over-eager puppy, there is no wa-ay he is going to let you ride out of here by yourself."
Shit. Rose was right. Cool, calm, collected. Breathing. No bouncing.
Charlie and Jake pulled up near to where we were standing and I walked over as quickly as I could without resembling said over-eager puppy.
"Glad to see you have already put on almost all of the protective gear, Bells. As much as I might be worried about all of this, it is good to see you taking your safety seriously." Charlie started pulling the bike out of the back of the truck, whilst reminding me of the rules of the permit.
"I know, Dad. I promise." I figured the less I said the better. If I reminded him that we had been over this a thousand times before and snatched my bike away from him, he might not be so cool about all of this.
"Good girl." Charlie paused just before giving me my bike though, causing more than a little panic on my side. It must have shown on my face too, "Now, don't look at me like that. I am still letting you ride. You have been so excited about today that there is no way I would tell you otherwise, but I do have some bad news."
Be cool. He said you could still ride. Responsible young adult. Even though I was reciting this all to myself, my inner Bella was screaming GIMME MY BIKE DADDY!
Thank goodness I keep her locked away.
"What is it, Dad? Is everything ok?" I tried to put an expression of pure concern on my face, to mirror the one he had on his.
He stroked his moustache, sighing, "I hope so. I just got a call from the station. Mark needs me down there to help with a domestic dispute that seems to be unravelling at the station as we speak." Shit. There is no way he is going to let me ride without him following me. But he said I could still ride today. Confusing. Maybe I should pay attention to what he is saying.
"So, as I said, I trust Jacob. I trust you. I trust that you will ride your bikes straight to the house. No detures. Following all of the road rules. I will know if you don't do as I tell you, Bells. I have eyes everywhere." Creepy, but true. One time, Alice and I tried to sneak out of the house when we were supposed to be doing homework because we had a craving for a milkshake at the diner, and Charlie was at the house waiting for us to get back, having been informed by a pair of said 'eyes' that we were there. Creepy, but true.
Ok. Time to reinforce the image of Adult Bella so I can get my ride on and show the growing number of lingering students my mad skillz on my bike. Haha. Suck it, haters. I am a hot biker chick in leathers.
"I promise, Dad. Straight home. Jake will be riding by my side the whole way and I am sure Emmett and Rose will be behind us too." I pooled all of the calmness and sincerity I could into the tone of my voice and the expression on my face. All joking aside, there was nothing for Charlie to worry about. I was a responsible rider.
"Ok, well make sure your gloves and helmet are on tight before you go. I have to get to the station – it sounded like Mark was about to have kittens." Charlie hesitantly handed the bike over me and went to walk back to the truck, but I kicked out the stand and left my baby for a minute.
I ran over to my Dad, hugging him from behind just like Emmett had done to me only minutes before. "Thank you for trusting me, Charlie. I won't let you down." I rested my head on his back for a moment, truly grateful for him being so cool about this.
"I know, Bells." He patted the hand I had on his chest. "That is why I am letting you do this."
I unwrapped myself from him and watched as he got in the truck and started driving away. It wasn't until he was out of sight that I turned back around to my friends.
"Oompf." Unfortunately, I turned straight into a 6ft Native American man-child. "The hell, Jake? Standing close enough?" I laughed.
He had his hands on my waist, straightening me up before looking straight into my eyes. "You ready for this, Surfer Girl?"
The grin was back on my face as I stared straight back at him. "That's Biker Girl to you, Jakey. I was born ready."
He pulled me in for a hug, kissing the top of my head. He had become a lot more physical with is signs of affection lately but in a gradual way, like he was trying to be stealth about it or something. I tried not to think about what it could mean. Instead, I just allowed myself to enjoy the hot older guy that was doing everything he could to be close to me. Like I have said before – Yay me.
He released me mostly, taking one hand instead and walking me over to Red. I'd named my bike that after Rosalie convinced Jacob to paint it in a bright lipstick red, because it was 'hot'. We told Charlie it was because it would make me be more visable to other drivers on the road.
"OK, Bells. Here we go. Gloves on." He handed me my gloves, which Alice had been holding for me during Charlie's speeches. "Helmet ready? Shit, Bella, where is your helmet?"
"Calm down, Jacob. It's in Emmett's Jeep. Emm, can I have the keys please?" Emmett threw me the keys and I quickly jogged over to the Jeep to grab them. Unfortunately, on the way back, something else grabbed me.
"What the hell do you think you are wearing, Isabella?" Edward yanked me back, hard, securing a vice grip on the top of my arm.
This was so not what I fucking needed right now. I was having the most perfect day. I have Red, Charlie had to go, and all of the nosey little idiots in my school were watching Jacob and I with interest. I was having fun.
Now? Not so much.
"Fuck off, Edward." I tried to stay calm, but I was almost taken aback by the amount of venom that came through in my voice. "Let go of me. Now."
His eyes flashed for a minute, almost allowing me to see a medicum of pain in them, before turning straight back to steel. "No. You will tell me right now what in FUCKS name you think you are doing."
I tried to pull my arm away from him, but he was having none of it, his mood resembling that hideous day at the bridge. Fucker. I remember this asshole all too well "I am going for a ride on my brand new bike, Edward. Surely you remember how much I like a good ride?" I moved my body closer too him, hoping that it would surprise him enough to let me go.
It didn't work. Instead, he pulled me the rest of the way in, hard against his chest. I wouldn't give in. I raised my chin in defiance, staring him straight in the eyes as he spoke to me. "Of course I remember, Isabella. I just didn't realise you would trade one ride in for such another. If you were so desperate for something between your legs, you should have come to me."
Every word he said to me that horrible day came crashing back around me, but this time, I drew strength from them. I repeated them back, almost verbatim.
"It's done, Edward. Move on."
He let go of my arm, dropping it as if he was burned by it, but he didn't step back. "Is that what you are doing, Bella? Moving on? Tell me, what are you moving on too? That Neanderthal? Please." It wasn't until he pointed at Jacob that I realised my friends and family had all moved in closely behind me, hearing every word we were saying. Rosalie was currently trying to hold Emmett and Alice both back from killing Edward and Jacob was slowly walking closer to me. I turned away from Edward and took Jacob's hand in mine before turning back.
"I am moving on, full stop. It was a great couple of minutes we had there, Edward, but you know as well as I do… that is all it was." I sneered at him, squeezing Jacob's hand in what I hoped was reassurance.
Jacob reached his spare hand to cup my face, pulling my gaze from Edward's to his. "Is this the guy, Bella?" His voice was so tender, so full of the care that he showed me every day, that it shook me. I hadn't told him the reason for my breakdown, but he had pieced enough together to realise that the reason was standing right in front of us.
"It doesn't matter, Jake. Really." I tried to show him with my eyes and my actions that I was ok, but I was starting to realise that he was not. "Just tell me, Bells. Is this him?" His voice was starting to loose the tenderness and a tension was beginning to show.
Fuck it.
"Yes, Jake. It was him."
I dropped my head as Jake released me. "Emmett, take care of Bella for a minute. Please." Jake started shepherding me towards where Rose had miraculously managed to calm Emmett and Alice enough that she wasn't having to restrain them anymore. When I realised what Jacob was doing, I stopped dead in my tracks, looking back up at him pleadingly. "No, Jake. Let it go. Please? Come on, I really want to give Red her first ride on the mean streets of Forks."
He smiled gently, but with a strain in his jaw. "I promise not to do anything, Bells. I just need a word with him, that's all. Go back to Red and get your stuff ready, we'll leave in a minute."
And leave the two of them get all macho and stupid? No way. I also knew that there were only two people alive that could match my stubborness and they were both staring each other down right now.
"I'm not going anywhere without you, Jake. Say what you need to say, but I am staying right here." I stood right next to him, as the equal he had always allowed me to be. He didn't prove me wrong. He simply reached out and took my hand again, before speaking to Edward.
"Right then, we'll make this quick. Edward, is it?" Edward didn't respond verbally, simply sneering at Jacob like the spoilt child he so often was. "I'm Jacob Black. Although I can guess, I don't know what the hell you did to Bella, but you need to know one thing. You will NEVER get the chance to do it again. I am here now. If you ever think of touching her, you will answer to me. Now, don't think I didn't see the way you grabbed her arm just then and, so help me God, if we get home and she has even a hint of a bruise I will hunt you down." The strength and assurity in his voice would have been frightening if aimed at me. He paused, making sure Edward had time to absorb his words.
He then continued "Now, we are going to walk away and continue the rest of our afternoon as we had planned. We are not going to give you another thought." Yeah, well that wasn't going to happen. Nice try though, Jakey. "You, however, are going to run home to Mummy's house, staying the fuck away from us, thinking about the million different things you are going to do to make sure that I never have to speak with you again. Don't fuck with me, boy. I have been around longer than you have and had way more time to learn how to deal with little shits like you."
Jacob turned, walking with me back to our bikes. He didn't say a word until we were out of earshot of Edward.
He stopped, pulling my head into his hands. "You ok, Bells?"
"Yeah, Jake. Thanks. You totes stopped me from kneeing him in the balls then." It seemed I was going to deal with the situation with humour, for now. The screaming and the crying would come later, I was sure of it.
He chuckled at me before kissing me on the forehead. "Good. I'd hate to be the one to tell Charlie you were suspended." He grabbed my helmet from my hand, putting it on my head and closing the visor.
"Let's get the hell out of here, honey."
The ride back to the house was exactly what I needed. The rush I always felt when on a bike was there, along with the exhilaration of finally having told Edward to fuck off. Jacob had been amazing too. Despite initially trying to hide me away, he allowed me to stand by his side whilst he spoke to Edward. It was the first time the true depth of his feelings had been made clear. Although they still scared me, I needed this man by my side too badly to let him see it.
That is why I let him kiss me.
Ok, so I didn't so much let him as didn't see it coming. When we got home, I was so buzzed that I kicked the bike to a stand still and ran over to him, jumping up and wrapping my legs around his waist. He spun me around for a good while, before stopped suddenly. Before I knew it, we were kissing. I don't know how it started or who started what, but he was kissing me and I was kissing him back. I am not an idiot. I am a seventeen year old nobody from Forks WA and the hottest, sweetest, specimen of a 19 year old man that NASCAR and the Quileute's have ever produced was running his tongue along my bottom lip. So I opened my mouth and the floodgates all at the same time.
He kissed me for a good couple of minutes, before setting me back down and resting his forehead against mine. "Fuck, Bella. I swore to myself I wouldn't do that until you were ready."
I must have looked confused, so he continued. "I have been wanting to kiss you for ages, but I knew you were still dealing with shit because of that fuckwit. I just…" he ran his hand through his hair before resting it on my cheek, staring into his eyes that were full of overwhelming feeling "I just couldn't wait anymore. I am bursting to the seams with a million different thoughts and emotions that I was going to burst if I didn't kiss you. Please tell me I didn't fuck it up?"
I reached up to kiss him again. It was nice. "You didn't fuck it up, Jake."
I pulled him inside and sat us on the couch, before demanding he tell me what was going on in his brain. I had been ignoring his feelings for far too long now and it wasn't fair. To him or to me.
He told me about how he liked me, wanted to kiss me, and wanted to be there for me in any capacity I would let him. He also told me about how much he would like to kill Edward for hurting me and for the things he overheard him saying to me today. I convinced him not to, telling him that I did need him, and he wouldn't be able to kiss me if he was in jail. This then led to a good 20 minutes of making out on the couch before he decided he had to go home. He didn't want to, but he also thought we both had a lot to process and he needed to get off the couch before he did something that might make Charlie want to shoot him. I assured him that I wouldn't mind, but he just kissed me hard before leading me to the front door.
"I want to do this right, Honey. All of it. Romance, dates, parental permission, the whole lot. I came so close to fucking it up today. I really don't want to fuck this up." He was running his thumb along my cheek as he spoke. I swear I was listening, but I was also staring at his lips, wondering whether he would let me suck on the bottom one for just a little bit longer.
Bella Swan is a hormonal teenager. Whatevs.
He quickly pulled his hand back. "You've got to stop looking at me like that, Bells. Seriously. I need you to listen for a minute."
I moved my eyes away from his lips, knowing that there is no way I would be able to concentrate if I didn't. "I'm sorry, Jake. You were saying?"
He smiled and pecked me on the lips before continuing. "I want to kiss you for hours, Bella Swan, but I want to be able to take you out as well." How in the hell am I supposed to concentrate when he starts talking about kissing for hours? "Charlie knows about how I feel about you."
OK, that'll do it.
"Don't worry. He's laid down a couple of ground rules with me in case you agreed to go out with me. They are all perfectly reasonable, I promise." His hand moved back to my cheek, trying to distract me.
Cheater.
I pulled away from him this time, crossing my arms in front of my chest. "What kind of rules, Jacob Black?"
He waved his hands around to try and make it seem like nothing. "Please don't be mad at me, Honey. I know it is customary to get the girl to say yes to a date before her Dad lays down the law, but he surprised me with them the other day. It seems he and Billy are a couple of old gossips and they figured out my How to Woo Bella Swan Plan."
Plan? I knew about the whole, let''tnotice thing, but there was a whole Plan? Wait a minute. "Don't try and distract me, Jake. We'll discuss your stealthy little plan later. What are the damn rules?"
"Bugger, thought that might distract you. I'm not fooling anyone, am I?" I shook my head, waiting for him to continue. He did. "Well, there are only a couple of rules. All completely understandable. Your curfew is 10pm on weeknights and 2am on weekends. If we go to any parties, your brother has to be there too. No alcohol. Nothing illegal."
Hmm. That all did sound quite reasonable. He already had the partying with Emmett rule and I wasn't surprised it was still in place. The curfew was fine, more than I expected really. I am not a massive fan of alcohol, so that isn't a biggie. Nothing illegal. Charlie is the Chief of Police and a father, so it isn't really surprising. I wasn't about to let Jacob and my father dictate all of the rules of my burgeoning relationship, though.
"Fine. But I have a rule of my own."
Jacob seemed weary all of a sudden, but waited for me to continue before objecting.
"I am a seventeen year old girl and you are the hot guy I am about to start dating, yes?" Nothing like a little flattery to catch a guy off guard.
"You think I am hot, Bells?" Ha.
I wrapped my arms around his waist, resting my chin on his chest to look up at him before laying down the law. "Yes, Jake. I think you are hot. I think you are very hot. I will be more than willing to share with you more things I think when you take me out on this date you keep talking about."
He responded favourably, wrapping me up in his arms as well, moving in for a kiss. Time to go in for the kill. I pulled my head back slightly, letting him know I was not done talking. "My rule, Jacob Black, is that you will not set any more rules with my father or discuss our relationship with him in any way without me present. If you want to date Charlie, feel free to discuss anything with him till your little heart is content." The look of shock, entertainment and disgust on his face was adorable, but I pushed myself to continue. I wanted to get back to the kissing. "If you want to date me, you will discuss these things with me. Understood?"
He nodded, clearly not sure if I was done talking yet.
We sealed the deal with a kiss.
A/N
Do you trust me? I swear this is an E/B fic, but Jacob is not the bad guy. E & B have a lot to go through before they are anywhere near a place to be romantic again.
I hope that all makes sense.
FYI - for CPW and anyone who was confused by what a 'fortnight' is from the last chapter? It is an English/Australian term for 14 days (2 weeks). So we go from 7 days=1 week, 2 weeks = 1 fortnight, 2 fortnights = 1 month.
Sorry! I sometimes forget that we speak in different languages!
Thanks again for sticking with me. It makes my day and encourages me to write. Well, that and the two bottles of wine I have purchased to celebrate pay day! Cheers!
Please review. Even if it is just a single word.