Chapter Fourteen
Headlights bored through them in the darkness and Olivia scrambled to all fours as quickly as her aching lungs would allow. Her vision blurred in front of her, the two white orbs taking on an effervescent glow as the hurtled toward her. The lights flicked twice as a hand waved out the window, and as she focused she recognized Elliot's square shoulders behind the wheel. The squeal of his brakes permeated the fog in her brain and she finally managed to get to her feet, her drenched clothes hanging heavily off her. He leapt out of the car, his gun brandished beside him as he scanned the abandoned car and the two bodies littered beside it.
"What the hell happened?" he asked, his eyes squinting in the type of anger only brought on by fear. "I saw the car flee, but didn't hear anything from you. No mayday or anything."
"Radio's busted," Olivia managed as she coughed. Her lungs weren't yet on board with the concept of speaking. "I couldn't get a signal." She turned toward Alex, who was getting to her knees, a tentative hand nursing the back of her head. "You okay?" she asked, extending an arm towards her. The blonde merely stared up at her for a silent second before nodding and reluctantly taking her hand.
"You couldn't get a signal? Then why the hell did you stay down here? You should have come back up to regroup."
"There was no need," she replied evenly as Alex's hand dropped limply from hers.
"Yeah," Elliot cut in, fingering the sopping collar of her shirt. "Looks like you got everything under control. Jesus, Liv." He ran a hand over the thin, brown bristle of hair that ran across his scalp, a nervous gesture she had seen him perform for years.
"Which way was the car headed?" Olivia asked, talking over him. She needed Elliot to play cop, not big brother.
"East," he said, with a wave of his thumb. "Fleeing like a bat at of hell. I managed to get the make and model, but not much else. We'll probably find it dumped alongside the parkway in the next couple of days." He walked closer to the body nearest to him, a small-framed boy who looked no older than a teenager. "Who are these cads?"
Olivia followed him, water sloshing in the only shoe still left on her feet. Chances are the boy had wanted to work his way up the criminal ladder. Instead, he ended up splayed with bullets outside a nameless dock. This type of tragedy had long since stopped phasing her, though, and she simply shrugged. "Spade's lackeys. They were ambushed."
Elliot's eyes darkened and he looked up at her. "You get an ID?"
"Nah, they were masked. Unloaded on these two and then took off with the goods." She tapped the boy's shoe with her own and shuddered, telling told herself it was merely from the chill of the water.
"You think they were Johnny's guys?" Elliot asked. "Who else would sabotage a Rabbits trade like this?"
Olivia shrugged. "Doesn't seem like Johnny's style," she said, gingerly touching a finger to a tender spot on her jaw. If it was Johnny, and he failed to tell her about his latest escapade, she'd kill him herself. They weren't partners by any means, but she expected at least that courtesy, even in a world of criminals. "If you're up for it, though, we could make a trip over there tonight and put that theory to rest."
Elliot gave her a once-over, taking in the wet clothes and the bruise that was surely forming along her jaw, but a small grin appeared on his face. "You still up for a shakedown after your little swim?"
A smile began to etch across Olivia's face, but it faded quickly at the sound of Alex's voice behind her.
"Are you two out of your goddamn minds?"
She turned, surprised at the vehemence in the blue eyes that stared back at them. Alex's jaw trembled with either the cold or with anger; either way, she didn't look pleased.
"You could have died tonight," she said to Olivia, her voice raw and accusing. "If whoever that was hadn't - " her voice caught, and she emphasized her outrage with a wave of her hand. "This is not just another day at the office playing cops and robbers." She moved suddenly, and briskly, toward the idling car that Olivia had seen barreling toward forward not fifteen minutes before.
"Alex," Olivia tried, tossing a guilty glance at Elliot.
"Go gallivanting off on a wild goose chase if you like," Alex replied. "No evidence, no trail, no leads. Prove that your dick is as big as his. I'm going home."
Olivia balked at the language, which was more suited for one of Munch's poker games than the mouth of her tall, regal assistant. Clearly the endorphins running through her own body hadn't had the same effect on Alex. Elliot took a step toward Olivia, his eyes narrowing. "You want to take her home? We'll reconnect first thing tomorrow morning at your office. If I get uniforms out here for these bodies, chances are they're going to want to know what they hell you two were doing here in the first place. They won't be so friendly."
Olivia tossed a glance at Alex, whose arms were crossed protectively over her chest as she stalked toward the car. "What makes you think she'll be any friendlier?"
Olivia was bone cold, her wet clothes pressing into her skin and creating a frigid tingle every time she moved. Still, she had managed to convince Alex to let her drive. The car hadn't sustained any damage, despite Alex's earnest claim that she had hit something. That was likely the only evidence they'd have on whoever ambushed them. In Manhattan's underworld, though, that would be like searching for a needle in a pile of needles.
Olivia's apartment was closest, and she drove them toward it, unwilling to leave Alex alone or to take the chance of walking back into the quagmire of Skid Row. She was much more confident she'd be able to monitor any loathsome activity in her own quiet neighborhood. When it came to her apartment building, she was usually the bottom of the barrel, and that was a breath of fresh air in her mind.
Their drive was silent, broken only by the persistent chatter of their teeth. Olivia felt like she could crawl into a warm grave, but Alex's icy paleness worried her as they finally walked underneath the low, glowing light outside her building. Alex hadn't spoken the entire ride home, but rather than anger, her shoulders seemed to hold a resigned exhaustion. Not that Olivia could blame her. Almost dying could do that to a gal.
Her apartment looked the same as she left it a few days before, having spent the majority of her nights sleeping at her office, but she didn't give Alex much time to take in the surroundings. "We need to get out of these wet clothes," she said, heading towards the small bathroom off the kitchen. As she turned on the shower and laid out a few towels, she heard Alex behind her, both her footsteps and the telltale chattering of her teeth giving her away.
"The water should be hot in a minute," Olivia offered, running her fingers under the lukewarm spray and relishing the thought of thawing out her freezing body. Alex simply stared at her with an almost ghostly gaze, her eyes startlingly blue against the paleness of her skin. "We'll feel a lot better after a shower," Olivia continued, wondering if perhaps the blonde was suffering from shock. "It will help settle our nerves."
"You go first," Alex said quietly, the first words she had offered since leaving the docks.
Olivia shook her head. "I'll change out of these clothes for now, but you're going in first." She offered up another smile, hoping to earn one from her assistant. "You did save my life, sweetheart. It's the least I can do."
The humor didn't earn her anything but a slight grimace as Alex's fingers reached up behind her neck, fumbling at the buttons on the back of her wet blouse. She shivered as she concentrated, her freezing fingers seeming not to cooperate.
"Here," Olivia offered, walking around her and handling the small, delicate buttons. Alex's neck was frigid, but clammy, and her shoulders were tense. For the first time that night, Olivia felt a surge of heat echo through her, and she forced herself to focus on anything other than the tall, thin body in front of her. If she couldn't earn a smile from the blonde, she definitely wasn't about to earn anything else.
Her fingers unlatched the last of the short row of buttons and Alex turned, her eyes holding a cold, unreadable depth. Saying nothing, the blonde pushed her into the wall with a force bred more out of sheer fear and exhaustion than desire, but her lips suddenly took Olivia's in a cold, desperate kiss. Olivia let out a quick grunt of surprise, her hands finding purchase on Alex's hips as she hit the wall. Her assistant's fingers gripped the wet edges of her shirt, not bothering with buttons, but instead pulling it over her head, her lips following the path of it, tracing over cool skin.
Olivia adjusted quickly to the frenzied pace, following suit by pulling Alex's blouse over her head. As Alex's hands fumbled with her own skirt, pushing it down over her hips, Olivia struggled with her pants, their clothes and undergarments piling at their feet in a wet heap. The blonde's skin was cold, but Olivia could feel her own fingers heating it, tracing warmth over her as they grazed the tips of her breasts. She pushed Alex forward into the small shower, pressing her against the tiled wall and letting the hot water rush over both of them. The heat of the water made her hiss as it mingled painfully with the iciness of her skin, but Alex caught her lips quickly, silencing her.
Between the kiss, the water, and Alex's feverish touch, Olivia warmed almost immediately. Their tongues tangled for dominance, but Alex's silent need was as palpable as the steam rising around them. Olivia broke the kiss long enough to turn her lips towards Alex's wet nipples, the water trickling off them and down her stomach. Alex groaned at the contact, her head pressing back against the tiled wall as Olivia's hands followed the trail of water all the way to her center.
They exchanged no words, only soft, wrenching sounds as their fingers vied for one another's bodies. Alex's hands caressed Olivia's breasts, her fingers gripping with a slight desperation as she attempted to pull the two of them closer together. Olivia's jaw ached from the kiss of the gun back at the docks, but it seemed to mesh with the internal ache coursing through Alex, and she leaned in to capture the blonde's needy lips once more.
Tracing Alex's folds, Olivia had the sudden, desperate need delve deeper into her. Her assistant's moan was muffled as she pressed her mouth along Olivia's shoulder. "Inside," she whispered, her voice barely carrying over the sound of the water, so low that Olivia was afraid she imagined it. More than willing, Olivia's fingers thrust firmly as Alex's teeth grazed the skin of her shoulder, her nails mimicking the gesture as they nails raked against Olivia's back.
As her thrusts found a long and deep pattern, Alex leaned her head against the wall, her eyes falling softly open. The current passing through them suddenly felt less primal and more like a need for connection. They didn't break eye contact until Alex's composure began to crumble under Olivia's touch, her shoulders going rigid against the wall as her hips bucked forward. Olivia curled her fingers, almost beckoning the blonde to come, and Alex let out a shuddering moan. She gripped Olivia's arms as her legs quivered, threatening to send her sliding down along the slick wall. The water seemed almost an after effect as it continued to rain down upon their stillness, and Alex pulled Olivia into her, holding her close. She pushed her back only slightly as her breath returned to her.
"I'm so mad at you," she whispered, her fist balled against Olivia's shoulder. "You're so goddamned reckless."
The vulnerability in Alex's eyes made Olivia lift the fist of clenched fingers, slowly kissing each knuckle. "I think we're both a little reckless," she replied quietly.
Alex shook her head almost imperceptibly, her eyes lowering. "That's not who I am."
"Then who are you?"
Alex let out an embarrassed half-smile, born out of frustration and cemented with self-hatred. "I'm just a very frightened woman," she said softly.
Olivia did see uncertainty in Alex's eyes, but there was something too solid and determined behind those eyes to count as fear. "We're fine, though," she said, dipping her head to catch the blue eyes that were staring somewhere along her collar bone. "We're okay for now."
The water was losing its heat against her back, and she moved reluctantly to shut it off. "If we stay in here, we'll be right back where we started. Shivering." Handing Alex a towel, she looked towards the mirror, which was fogged over. "How about I make us some tea?" she asked.
Alex shook her head. "I just want to be in bed with you."
The words made Olivia's head jerk upwards, but they didn't hold that same desperate desire that had moved Alex earlier. Instead, her eyes were innocent and clear. Her request was blatantly direct. And Olivia was fine in granting it.
They dressed, spreading their wet clothes along any spare space they could manage. Olivia did make tea for the two of them, the least she could offer considering her stomach was still tied in small, coiled knots from their night at the docks.
Alex turned her attention to the small photo that rested on one side of the bed as she sunk onto it. Olivia's pajama top swallowed the blonde's lean torso, but her long, pale legs peeked appealingly from underneath it. "Is this you?" she asked, picking it up the frame. "You and Elliot?" A disbelieving smile crossed her face.
"All right, you can sleep here, but you can't pry," Olivia said with a grin as she took it from Alex's hands. "Yeah, that's us."
"Is that his shirt?" Alex asked with a knowing smile, pointing to the oversized button-down Olivia wore in the photo, stuffed into a pair of short pants that made her resemble a newsboy more than a nine-year-old girl. At that point, her mother had stopped buying her clothes altogether. Alex took the photo from her and set it back on the dresser. "You two look happy," she said.
"We had probably just knocked over a candy store or something," Olivia said.
Alex laughed. "That must be why you're so good at tracking criminals now, is that it?"
Olivia returned her smile as she leaned back on the bed, swinging her legs up. "Possibly," she said with a pointed raise of her eyebrow.
Alex moved closer and rested her head against Olivia's chest, the steady beat against her ear comforting in a way that she hadn't known it could be. Her fingers traced the small slice of skin between the hem of her boss' shirt and the waist of her pajama pants, which matched the top she borrowed. She smiled as Olivia's fingers trailed thoughtfully down her arm.
"Alex, Robert came to the office this morning," she said, exhaling.
The soft touch suddenly sent a quiver knifing through Alex's veins, and she swallowed back a mix of fear and anger. "Why?" she asked, shifting and looking up at her.
Olivia shrugged. "He wanted me to think you were working this case with him. Wanted me to believe that you were on a side other than mine."
"That's not true," Alex said, once again ready to defend her intentions, but Olivia cut her off with a stark laugh.
"Come on, Alex, after tonight? I know it's not true." She sighed, running a hand along Alex's side. "I wasn't going to mention it, but things just got a whole lot more complicated. I need to know why he has it in for you so badly. He's ADA; he's got everything he wants. Why the obsession with you?"
With each word, Alex drifted further from Olivia's touch, as if folding in on herself. "I don't know," she said, slipping onto her side, barely able to speak over the lump in her throat. "Things got bad after I contested my mother's will."
"Sounds like they weren't too great before that."
A new heat colored her face and it wasn't from the tea, or the shower, or Olivia's touch, which suddenly felt claustrophobic as it rested along her waist. "Olivia, can we not – can we just not do this right now?"
Her question was met with a simple kiss on the back of her shoulder and she closed her eyes against the wetness welling behind then, hoping that they stayed just as buried and unseen as the secrets she'd worked so hard to keep. "Whatever he did to you Alex, however long ago, it wasn't your fault," Olivia whispered. "Just know that." She sealed her words with another kiss.
With those words, she felt Olivia inside her with an intimacy that differed wholly from the physical love they shared earlier. Whatever happened or didn't happen between them, her boss had wedged her way into a place Alex had thought numbed over years ago.
"I followed you," she said softly, wiping her eyes as she looked back at Olivia over her shoulder. "The day before I called you to request an interview. I followed you from your office all the way to Central Park."
She felt Olivia raise her head, glancing inquisitively at her. "Always a detective, huh?"
"I wanted to know who I would be working for," she qualified.
"Oh yeah? What'd you learn?"
"That you walked briskly, but were always watching your surroundings. That you drank your coffee black and had a soft spot for cannolis. That you knew this city like the back of your hand."
Olivia laughed. "That when I'm not spying on the Manhattan underworld, the job can be pretty boring."
Alex smiled, resting her head back on her pillow. "You smiled once the entire time I watched you. Just once."
"That sounds about right," Olivia said with a nod. "Manhattan doesn't bring out the jester in me. What did I smile at?"
"A blue bird."
"A what? In Manahttan?"
"Mhmm," Alex said, recalling the memory with a smile. "It stopped beside you on a newsstand. And you looked over at it and grinned. Like you were sharing a secret with it."
"And that's what made you want to work for me?"
"It didn't hurt," Alex replied lightly.
"Hiring you was one of the best moves I ever made," Olivia said, her hand moving along the curve of Alex's hip.
"Of course it was," she replied. "Where else can you get a secretary, lover, partner, and rescuer for such a steal?" Their banter had taken a turn for the lighthearted, but a tight ball of anxiety settled just below her chest at the mention of their brush with death. At her own near brush with death that inexplicably had left her unharmed.
"Speaking of," Olivia said. "You must have put up a pretty good fight tonight. How in the hell did you scare them off?" she asked. "If you used the gun I gave you, I give you permission to carry it everywhere from here on out."
Alex felt her blood run as cold as if she'd just hauled out of the ocean. She had played the scene over in her mind, the panic as the gun pressed against her chin, and then the wash of confusion as it hit the wood beside her. For a moment she had thought the crack was her own skull. "I don't know," she replied, which was partly true. Something about the action nagged at her, and she wasn't ready to confront it. At least not with Olivia lying beside her. "Can we talk about it tomorrow and just get some sleep?" she asked, turning over and pulling Olivia's arm over her waist.
"Sure," Olivia said against her neck, pressing a light kiss against it.
Alex bit her lip, swallowing back a lump of acidic fear. Olivia may be holding her, but only Robert would color her dreams that night. She closed her eyes, preparing for the nightmares to come.
The ring of the telephone jarred Olivia out of an almost drugged sleep, and she groaned as she reached over to silence it. The morning light had just started inching its way across her floor, which meant it was way to early for her to consider usual business.
"Yeah," she said, not bothered with formalities at such an early hour. She glanced over at Alex, who was just rousing out of her own slumber, wiping a hand across her heavy-lidded eyes.
"Olivia."
Olivia bristled at the sound of Nan's voice, which sounded thick and throttled at the other end of the line. "Nan. What is it?" she asked, glancing at the stopwatch on her table. "It's just after dawn."
"You got another body," Nan replied, her voice holding none of its usual confidence. "I wanted to call you first."
"Where?" Olivia glanced over at Alex, who had straightened at her sudden change of voice, raising her eyebrows over at her.
"Here. Birdie's." Nan's voice shook. "I found her this morning on my way in."
"Shit," Olivia muttered. Things had suddenly hit too close to home. "I'll be there in twenty minutes," she said. "Call Elliot, Nan. Lock up and don't open the goddamn door for anyone who isn't wearing a uniform, you got it?"
"Yeah," she said, distractedly. "Just get here, Liv."
Olivia hung up, glancing over at Alex. "Unfortunate wake up call," she said lowly.
"What is it?"
"I gotta go," she said, her mind buzzing despite the fog of sleep she had just been pulled from. She climbed out of bed, already pulling her shirt over head and heading for the small cut out in the wall that she had made into a makeshift closet.
Alex sat up. "Olivia, I'm not the jealous type, but I think it's best if you explain why you're rushing out of bed at the crack of dawn to see your ex-girlfriend."
Olivia shook her head as she reached for a shirt from the closet. Leave it to Alex to command logic this early in the morning. "Another body's been found," she answered, her fingers making quick work of the buttons.
Alex's eyes widened as she swung her legs out of bed. "I'm coming with you."
Olivia put up a halting hand. She didn't need Alex and Nan together, period, much less with a dead body to deal with, too. "Alex, I think it's best if you stay here," she said.
"Are we back here again?" Alex asked with a raised eyebrow and a purse of her lips.
The question gave Olivia pause, especially after the previous night, and she shook her head, resigned to the fact that somehow, she had actually come to rely on Alex. "We're leaving in five," she warned.
"I'll be ready in three," Alex piped, but furrowed her brow at the still damp clothes that hung along Olivia's dresser. "Please tell me you have a skirt or something remotely feminine lying around here somewhere?"
By the time Alex and Olivia arrived, a couple of police cars were already stationed in front of Birdie's, with a couple of uniforms blocking off the alleyway that lead to the back of the building. As they made their way back, Alex glimpsed Nan walking toward them, her arms clasped protectively over her. She seemed composed, as always, but the lines around her eyes let Alex know that she was indeed shaken. She felt a flicker of concern pass through her as she remembered the DA's investigation of the club. Certainly, a dead body wouldn't help Nan tout the positives of such an establishment.
"Nan, what the hell happened?" Olivia asked, and Alex saw the muscles tense underneath her coat. Her boss had been quiet on the way over, and Alex caught the protectiveness in her stance as she leaned into the shorter woman.
"The hell if I know," Nan answered tersely. "I came in early to grab some notes I left in the office, and just happened to come in the back way. She was out there, just lying on the ground. Completely discarded. It's Mattie. Shit," she muttered shakily, as if the words were catching up with her all over again.
Alex followed Olivia's gaze behind Nan, where Elliot and a fellow officer knelt beside the body. A large dumpster loomed to the side of them. Whoever had dumped the body hadn't seen fit to discard it there; whoever it was had wanted her to be found. Alex gasped as they stepped forward, and she focused on the body, recognizing the normal chestnut brown hair and the soft, slightly flat button nose that she had seen only two nights before.
"Jesus Christ," Olivia murmured, shaking her head at the familiar face.
"I'm guessing you know her, too," Elliot said.
Olivia nodded, averting her gaze for a moment. Alex took a step backward, a hand still over her mouth. "Yeah," the brunette replied, turning back to Elliot with a frown. "Girl's done some work for Spade. But she's been helpful to us, too. She was on the inside."
"Not anymore," Elliot said with a grimace. "Same MO, though" he said, walking over to them, holding out an envelope with a pair of gloves. "Jewelry in the throat, the likes of which she never would have possessed herself." To emphasize his point, he slid the jewelry out into his gloved palm, displaying a delicate ruby ring with what used to be a shiny, but now tarnished gold band.
Alex stared down at his hand, and felt heat suddenly rise from her chest to her face, even as the air whooshed from her lungs. She knew that ring. She had long ago memorized its contours, had run her hands over it so many times as a child studying her mother's hands. She had even seen it immortalized in the stack of photos that Liz Donnelly had given her.
"Alex, you okay?" Olivia asked, but she couldn't summon a breath of air, much less a response. She backed away, running into a policeman who braced her arms with a pair of strong hands. She shrugged violently away from him as she continued toward the street, the walls of the alleyway suddenly tunneling in on her. Only one person had access to that ring.
"Alex?" she heard again, but she walked blindly toward the block of sunlight at the end of the alley. The night before at the dock had left her with a nagging, crushing guilt, which was now threatening to rise from her stomach. She recalled the way Robert had brandished her father's pocket watch, the gloat in his eyes at possessing everything that should have rightfully belonged to her. Including the ring. She heard the crack of the gun against the wood of the dock, the crack that should have been for her, but for some reason she had been spared.
The whole time, Robert. He had left her alive for a reason. When would he come after her?
"I need to go home," she said, her heart suddenly too big for her chest, and she leaned a hand against the wall as a wave of nausea sent the sidewalk up to meet her.
"Alex, come back inside," Olivia said, reaching for her. "I know it's upsetting, but we'll find whoever did this to her."
Alex leaned away from her touch and tried to straighten, but she did so on wobbly legs. "I just need to go home," she repeated.
"No, Alex, it isn't safe there. Come on, I'll take you back to the office." Again Olivia reached for her with a tender touch, a worried furrow crossing between her gentle brown eyes.
Alex jerked away as if burned, the sereneness of the touch a reminder of how little she deserved it. How had she not known what he was capable of? "No, I – I'll be fine. I just need to be alone for a little while."
Olivia frowned, clearly unable to discern Alex's sudden change in mood, and for the time being, she wanted to keep it that way. Robert had come within inches of killing Olivia and destroying the one good thing Alex had managed to salvage in a life that he had tried so hard to destroy. She wouldn't let him come near her again. If the cops thought Johnny Mack had something to do with the murders, then so be it. At the least, it would keep Olivia from getting too close to what had suddenly become a dangerous truth.
She knew where she needed to go; a place she hadn't been in years. It was finally time to confront her past before anyone else was hurt by it. Olivia's gaze still burned into her as she turned and walked away, but Alex refused to look back at her. This was now her battle and hers alone.
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